I'm glad I'm not counting on the bus to get home, tonight, Annie thought as she tried to peer through the snow that stuck to the bus window. And I'm really glad Jack's car has such good safety ratings. I'm a little worried about driving in this mess.
The snow was falling so heavily; she could barely see the glow of the streetlights from the bus. Annie had to ask the bus driver to alert her when they reached her stop, as she couldn't see well enough to make out the street signs and she was afraid she wouldn't even be able to see the big church on the corner of her stop.
"You be careful out there, you hear?" The bus driver looked at her with motherly concern as Annie climbed down the steps and into the snow. "Don't walk in the road, even if the sidewalks are snowy. It's hard for drivers to see in this blizzard, and it's dangerous for you to be out walking."
Annie thanked the driver for her concern and promised to stay on the sidewalks, even if it took longer. Despite the storm, Annie wasn't in a hurry to get to Jack's house.
Annie had to keep blinking her eyes to clear the snow from her lashes as she trudged through the drifting powder and thought about what to do when she got to Jack's house. Last week, she had hardly been able to eat anything at dinner because she had been so worried about her upcoming spanking. Maybe she should just get her spanking over with as soon as she got there. With the way this snow was coming down, she might not be able to stay very long, anyway. The streets were a mess and only getting worse. She didn't want to come all the way out here to Jack's house and miss Mamie's eightieth birthday party, only to find she would have to postpone her spanking until another day because Jack had to take her back to her dorm before the streets were too snowy to drive.
The thought of her spanking filled her with dread, but maybe it would be best just to get it over with. Although the spanking last week had hurt, it hadn't been nearly as scary as the first spanking Jack had given her, and afterwards, she had felt an incredible feeling of relief as the crushing guilt she'd felt over her misbehavior had lifted at the conclusion of her spanking.
Annie's breath fogged around her as she climbed the steps onto Jack's porch. She could hear the sound of music coming from inside, but it stopped suddenly as soon as Sam began barking to let Jack know that she had arrived. Jack had the door thrown open and was ushering her inside by the time she reached the top step.
"You didn't have to turn off your music just because I got here," Annie said as Jack unwound her scarf and helped her out of her coat.
"Turn off?" Jack looked surprised. "I was playing the piano. I stopped to let you in."
"Oh!" Annie looked over at the grand piano in the living room. "That was really good. It sounded like…like…" Annie floundered for a second. "Like a real band or something," she finished lamely.
Jack laughed. "I took both classical and jazz piano lessons for years, but nobody ever told me my piano playing sounded like a band before."
Annie felt the blush creeping over her face. Why did she always say something stupid around Jack? She couldn't seem to walk into his house without putting her foot in her mouth. "I mean… I didn't mean… I…" She bent to take off her boots and hide her face.
"I guess I should say thank you." Jack attempted to make her feel better as he brushed the snow off Annie's coat and hung it up. "I'd like to be in a band some day, maybe after I get tenure. Although, I'd rather play guitar than piano in a band. I took up the guitar in high school because I thought it was way cooler than piano, but I still like to 'tickle the ivories' now and then. How about you? Do you play any instruments?"
When Annie shook her head, Jack sat back down at the piano again. "Would you like me to play something for you?" he said as his hands gently pressed a few chords.
Annie took a deep breath. Might as well get it over with, she'd feel better once it was over, and if she wasn't as nervous, maybe she wouldn't be as likely to make stupid comments.
"Jack, can I ask you something?" Annie rubbed her hands together to warm them up. I can do this, she told herself. I can ask Jack just to get the spanking over with right away.
"Sure, Annie." Jack looked at her standing there nervously, and he thought he knew what she was going to ask. She wanted to ask him to forget about her remaining spankings.
* * *
Jack had been thinking along the same lines, all week. He should let her out of the rest of the spankings he had promised her. When he had gotten her call and rushed to rescue her from her attacker last weekend, he'd realized how much he wanted to protect her. He wanted so badly to tell her about the feelings he had for her.
He had tried to talk to her all week, but they were never alone. Because she had been attacked in his lab, the university wanted to reinforce the security of the lab, to protect both the animals and the personnel. Construction crews had been there from early morning until late at night, installing security cameras, biometric locks, panic buttons and secret alarm systems, and even a pressurized locking, two-stage entry, airtight double security door to the inner room where the rats were kept. The inner rat room was now completely isolated from the outer lab offices.
Jack had thought long and hard about how to proceed with Annie. He had ordered a new leather paddle last week over the internet, and it had arrived, a couple of days ago. When he'd opened it and hefted it, he had loved the feel of it in his hand, and he had imagined spanking Annie with it. Then, the memories of rushing to her rescue started to intrude, and he'd realized there were many things he'd rather do than spank her.
Finally, this afternoon, Jack had decided he would let her know how he felt about her, tonight. He'd originally wanted to take it more slowly, maybe take her out few more times, share things with her, let her warm up to the idea that he wanted to be with her. But after the trauma she'd suffered last weekend, all he had wanted to do was hold her and keep her safe. Instead, he'd had to leave the comforting to other people, her friends and her brother, and watch from a distance, as they took care of her.
He couldn't live that way any longer. He had to tell her how he felt about her. He could only hope she would at least consider a more intimate relationship with him. Tonight was his best chance. Instead of spanking her, he would tell her how he felt.
Now, it seemed as if she was on the same wavelength. At least, she seemed about to ask him to let her out of her spankings. When she did, they would talk and he would, slowly and gently, try to let her know the depth of his feelings for her.
Jack smiled at Annie and said, "Ask me anything."
Annie took another deep breath and blurted out, "Can we just get my sp-spanking out of the way, first thing?"
Jack tried to hide his surprise. That was not at all what he had been expecting. "But, Annie, I—"
"Please, Jack!" Annie's voice held a note of desperation. "I just want to get it out of the way."
"But, Annie," Jack began again. "We don't—"
"You remember how much better I felt last week, afterwards. I just want to get it over with and then I'll feel better again."
Jack looked at her there, her hands curled into fists on top of the piano, rocking on her toes in her nervousness, and he did remember. She had been terrified of her spanking last week, but after it was finished, she had cried herself to sleep as the burden of guilt lifted from her. She had told him how much she suffered from guilt and anxiety and explained that the spankings gave her a way to escape, instead of carrying the burden with her for the rest of her life.
As he struggled with his conflicted feelings, the irony of the situation struck him. Ever since he was fourteen and he had stumbled in on his oldest sister's fiancé spanking her, Jack had wanted more than anything to find a naughty young woman who would agree to be spanked for her misdeeds. Now he had finally found a willing female, one who was asking him to spank her, one who had told him how much better she felt after he spanked her, because it helped relieve her of debilitating guilt, and how did he feel? He didn't want to spank her! Was this God's way of punishing him for all the erotic fa
ntasies he had entertained about spanking his various girlfriends over the years? If so, it was a fitting punishment, he thought ruefully.
Jack clearly remembered the day, when he was fourteen and he burst in on David spanking Morgan. It had been just a few weeks before their wedding, and Morgan had been freaking out over last minute details about the reception. She had been uncharacteristically testy all day, and his mother had sent his father and other sisters off on various errands, trying to placate her. Jack had been too young to drive, so he had been stuck at the house with Morgan and their mother and Morgan's fiancé, David, all doing everything in their power to make Morgan's wedding perfect or at least less distressing to her. But Morgan had just gotten more and more demanding and had finally snapped at her mother, "I don't give a damn about the napkins, Mama, I just want the flowers on the table to match the damn dresses!"
Jack had been a little shocked at Morgan's words, as Mama never allowed swearing in the house, but before Mama could reply, David had taken his fiancé firmly by the arm and escorted her up to her room. Both Jack and Mama were relieved that David was going to talk to her and calm her down. Jack couldn't understand what all the fuss about flowers was for, anyway.
A few minutes later, Jack had gone to his room to get ready for swim practice. He was looking forward to getting out of the house and away from all the wedding craziness, so at first, he didn't even notice the sounds coming from his sister's room next door. As he was pulling on his swim trunks, though, he recognized the sound of his sister crying and the scolding tone of David's voice. He felt a little bad for Morgan. She was normally such a loving person, and, being twelve years older than he was, they had never had a problem with sibling rivalry. In fact, she'd always been the one to look out for him when he would fight with his middle sister, Bailey. He hoped David wouldn't make her feel too bad about what she had said to Mama. She was just under a lot of stress, getting ready for the wedding.
As he gathered up his goggles and sunscreen to put into his swim bag, Morgan's crying grew louder then Jack heard what sounded like a sharp slap. It came again and again, while Morgan's cries increased in intensity. Jack couldn't believe his ears! Was David actually hitting Morgan? Jack was frozen with shock for a moment. Sweet, mild mannered David, the guy who had taught Jack how to ride a bike and had been almost like a part of their family ever since Jack could remember, was beating Morgan?
Jack leapt into action. With his father out running errands, Jack had to be the man of the house and defend his family. Jack had always been tall for his age, but even so, he knew that, at only fourteen, he was no match for a grown man twice his age. His eyes scanned his room frantically for anything he could use to his advantage. Of course, there were no real weapons here, and his father kept the hunting rifles downstairs under lock and key, but his eye fell on his lacrosse stick. It would have to do.
Naked except for his swim trunks, Jack grabbed his lacrosse stick, ran out of his room and burst into his sister's room next door. "You get your frickin' hands off my sister, you…you…girlfriend abuser!" Jack bellowed with all the bravado he could muster.
As Jack looked around the room, he felt confusion dawning. Instead of finding his sister cowering on the floor in a corner, while David the Brute stood over her swinging his fists at her, a very unexpected scene greeted him. David was sitting on the bed and Morgan was draped across his lap, with her jeans and panties around her knees. David held Morgan's hairbrush in his hand and appeared to be spanking her with it like a child.
Jack's confusion only increased when, instead of appearing grateful to him for rescuing her, Morgan actually began screaming at him. "What are you doing in here? Get out of my room! You have no right to burst into my room without knocking. Get out of here, right now!"
Jack was so surprised, he almost dropped his lacrosse stick. "B-but…I'm rescuing you." He couldn't quite comprehend what was happening. Why didn't Morgan rush over and hide behind him so he could protect her better? Why was she laying over David's lap getting a spanking? Why was she yelling at him?
Morgan screamed at him again, to get out of her room, but Jack had just stood there staring at her, trying to make sense out the situation, until David had taken charge.
David scooped Morgan up in his arms and set her on the bed, where she hastily and awkwardly tried to pull her panties and jeans back on. He walked over to where Jack stood in the doorway and put his hand on Jack's shoulder. Jack was too confused to try to fight him off with the lacrosse stick.
"Listen, buddy. Go down to my car and wait for me there. I'll give you a ride to swim team practice and I'll explain everything on the way. Go on, now." David spoke quietly but firmly.
Jack hesitated, reluctant to leave Morgan alone with a man who beat her, but when she screamed at him yet again to get out, he turned and hurried back to his own room. He grabbed his bag of swim gear but took the lacrosse stick with him, just in case.
As he hurried through the kitchen, Mama came in with a worried look on her face. "Is everything okay? I thought I heard Morgan yelling."
"I think maybe she's gone crazy!" Jack didn't know what to tell his mother. He couldn't even make sense of it himself. "Maybe all this wedding stress has driven her completely over the edge."
Mama reached for her keys to drive him to swim team, but Jack told her that David had offered him a ride. He went outside and waited by David's car, still clutching his lacrosse stick. After a moment, David came out, his eyes searching Jack's face as he hurried down the driveway.
"Hey, buddy, you're starting to scare me with that stick. Why don't you leave it here?" The tense smile on David's face tightened as Jack just gripped the stick even more firmly.
"I don't know, buddy," Jack replied evenly. "Do I need it to keep you from abusing any more women while you drive?"
David sighed and leaned against the car. "Okay, Jack. I'm going to talk to you man to man, and if you still feel like hitting me after we're done, you can, but not with that stick, okay? If you still think I deserve it, you can punch me once, as hard as you want, and I won't try to stop you. Is it a deal?"
Jack still felt uncertain, but he walked over and put his lacrosse stick in the garage. He refused to look at David as he got in the car.
It was a car ride that changed Jack's way of thinking for life. David had explained to him that some women (and some men, too, but Jack had found that even harder to believe) had a strong psychological need to be held accountable for their behavior. He explained that some people look for a partner who will help them to be the best person they can be, by enforcing rules and standards that they decide on together.
David told Jack that when he met Morgan in college, Morgan was a bit on the wild side. After they had been dating for a few months, they had a big fight about Morgan's irresponsible behavior. David had considered breaking up with Morgan until she had confessed to him that what she really wanted in a partner was someone who would lay down the law and not let her get away with the crap she pulled. She had asked David to help her control her behavior by holding her accountable, whenever she failed to live up to her standards. She asked David to be there for her, protect her, and love her, but to punish her if she stepped out of line. She told him she needed him to spank her if she misbehaved, because she needed firm but loving discipline in order to flourish.
Jack had been shocked that his smart and successful, about-to-become-a-veterinarian, sister would choose such an arrangement, but it started to make more sense to him as David explained the tenets of Domestic Discipline relationships. David also told him that a man had to hold himself to very high standards, if he expected to be responsible for the discipline of his wife, and many men were reluctant to accept that much responsibility.
As Jack thought about all the things David explained to him, he decided that he wanted to be the kind of man David was describing. He wanted to be a man whom a woman could count on to take care of her. He wanted to develop the kind of inner strength and self-control that David t
old him was necessary for a successful marriage of this type. It would take a lot of hard work, self-discipline, and fortitude, but Jack was determined to become a man worthy of the kind of relationship David had described to him. At fourteen, Jack decided what he wanted in a marriage, and he had spent the last twelve years of his life trying to become the man he needed to be to live the life he wanted.
Now, standing here in front of him, was a woman telling him she needed his discipline.
Jack stood up and reached for her hand. "Okay, Annie, let's get it over with."
Chapter 13
As a series of emotions flitted across Annie's face, Jack thought to himself that she really was an open book. He could see relief that he had agreed to her request, quickly followed by a tremor of fear, after which, a look of grim determination followed. Still holding her hand, he led her up the stairs.
* * *
Annie wanted to object, protest that she had changed her mind, think of some reason to delay, but she took a deep breath and followed Jack upstairs. At the door to Jack's study, she suddenly balked, resisting stepping over the threshold. When Jack reached back and put his arm around her shoulders, guiding her into the room, she ceased her resistance and entered quietly.
The room was not set up the way it had been last week. There was still a desk and some file cabinets on one side and a television and couch on the other, but here was no chair in the center with a ruler on it, as there had been the last time he had spanked her.
Jack dropped his arm and walked across the room to the table near the desk. He pulled out the same chair he had sat on last week to spank her.
As he moved the chair to the middle of the room again, he spoke quietly to Annie. "I want you to go into my room and bring me the paddle. It's in the top drawer of my bureau. Go get it and bring it to me, here."
Submitting To Her Professor Page 13