I walk out to find both Rigs and Kaden standing and looking at me. It almost makes me look behind me to see if they are looking at something else. I’m not sure what to make of their faces.
“So, umm. He’s all clean, and asleep,” I say as I make it over to them.
“I was just telling Rigs that I’m starving and need some American food. If you don’t mind, there’s a little place up the road next to a park. I really just want a good burger and fries. We can get it to go and eat outside,” Kaden says really quickly.
“That works for me. Rigs? You on board?” I ask just as nervous.
“Yep. We can put K.C. in his stroller and I’ll walk around with him while he sleeps to give you two kiddos a chance to talk,” he says, giving me a wink.
I feel weird riding over with Rigs. I want to be with Kaden, but this is all just strange. I don’t know how to act or what I’m supposed to do. I feel like a teenager again with a school girl crush.
Once we order and receive our food to go, we walk across the street this little quaint park. Rigs eats with us and then excuses himself. K.C. should be waking up soon. I don’t know how long Kaden and I will have to talk.
“I’m sorry again to spring this on you like this. I didn’t know how to handle it, and I just thought that an email was too impersonal. It took me so long to even find you. I never thought I would. I imagined you walking into my deli years from now and discovering him. I went into labor when I discovered your emails. Then with everything baby related going on, I didn’t respond right away. I thought I lost my chance. It wasn’t until the second time that Rigs came in that we struck up a conversation and discovered there was a connection. He pulled some strings and was able to find out when you were coming back…” I trail off and wait to hear his response.
“At first I thought you were with Rigs. I was so confused and pissed…” he hesitates and looks around like he’s searching for the right words.
“I could tell,” I interrupt.
“I’m not really good with talking to people. There’s so many things going on in this big head of mine. Just know that I’m not upset. I’m surprised, of course, but I remember that we didn’t use protection,” he makes a face and shakes his head. “I’m sorry about that. I’m not usually that irresponsible. I’m more pissed that I left you to deal with all of this alone. He’s beautiful, Alyse.”
“He looks like his daddy,” I say with a smile.
“Poor kid,” he says with a chuckle. “So, I’m off for a week. I don’t want to assume anything, but I’m hoping that I can use that time to spend with K.C. I can get a hotel.”
“I’d love that. I don’t want to assume anything either, but you can stay with us. Listen, I don’t expect anything from you except to be a part of K.C.’s life. I don’t want to think you are trapped.” I jump a little when Kaden immediately stands.
Putting his hands on his hips, he bends over a little and looks directly into my eyes.
“I take responsibility of what’s mine,” he says with a little growl.
“I didn’t…” I stand up as well.
“Sorry,” he interrupts, clearing his throat. “That came out too harsh. I want you to know first and foremost that I will help and I will take care of him…you. I will be a part of his life at the least.
“I like you, Alyse. From the moment I met you, I felt a connection. We owe it to that little boy to try. Hell, we owe it to ourselves to take the chance, right?”
“So, we take it one day at a time?” I ask.
“One day at a time. It’s not like I want us to move in together right away. I can’t anyways, Alyse. I have six months left on my enlistment and I’ll be deployed for the last three of those months,” he says quickly.
“Wait, you have to go away again? When?” I ask, feeling a pull in my gut.
“Shit. See. I’m an idiot. I could have done that better,” he says, coming around the table and placing his hands on my shoulders. “I’ll drive up to see you and K.C. every weekend until I have to leave.”
I reach out and fist my hands into the sides of his shirt and place my forehead in the middle of his chest. My nose is instantly filled with his masculine scent. My body instantly reacts causing me to shudder.
“Okay. I have a feeling there will be a few obstacles to get around in the beginning. We’ll figure it out,” I whisper.
Kaden pulls me into an embrace and I instantly feel protected. His strong arms envelope me. I wrap my arms around his waist and let out a sigh.
“You feel good in my arms. I think I could get used to this,” he says as I feel his lips kiss the top of my head.
“I agree that I feel good in your arms.” I respond.
“Mamamama,” I hear K.C. calling.
I don’t want to let go of Kaden, so I twist a little to see Rigs coming towards us with a very awake K.C. waving to us. He always makes me smile and fills my heart with such love.
“Sorry, he was insistent on coming back to his Momma,” Rigs says.
“It’s okay. I figured he would be getting up soon,” I say, releasing Kaden.
I unbuckle K.C. from his stroller and grab his diaper bag. “Okay first Daddy lesson of the day. Diaper changing.”
“Um what? I don’t know anything about any of that,” Kaden says, backing away.
“He’s just wet. I’m not going to make you do it, just make you watch and teach you a few things,” I say, laughing.
I grab a changing pad from the bag and lay it down on the picnic table. Kaden steps over beside me and gives me his undivided attention. I gently lay K.C. down and place my hand on his belly.
“Always make sure you have a hold of him. He rolls and squirms a lot,” I say, pulling a diaper and wipes out with my loose hand.
I quickly loosen his clothes and start to take off the dirty diaper. “Now this next part is very important. There’s something magical about air and the penis. Once the open-air hits it, it wants to pee. Always have something to cover it or it will go off and you will not enjoy the outcome.”
K.C. giggles and claps his hands like he is cheering the few times I got hit unexpectedly. “You think that’s funny, don’t you, buddy?”
Another round of claps and giggles occur. Kaden holds out his hand and K.C. slaps it. “Hey! Don’t encourage him!”
“Sorry,” Kaden says, laughing. “Just couldn’t help it.”
“Getting ganged up on already,” I say with a smile.
I finish explaining how you need to wipe him clean and show Kaden how to put on a new diaper. I finish getting K.C. dressed and Kaden immediately reaches down and picks him up.
“That didn’t look too hard. The rough part looked to be all the little buttons. I’ve got big hands,” Kaden says, patting K.C. on the rear as he bounces him on his arm.
“Wait till you have to do number two. Your son is a healthy pooper. Those are not enjoyable,” I say, putting everything back in the diaper bag. I toss the dirty diaper in the trash can.
“I’ll leave that up to you,” Kaden say, wrinkling his nose. “I already got to smell it once. No thank you.”
“Oh no, you don’t get off that easy. Mom needs a break from poop duty,” I say, pulling out some baby food.
Kaden straddles the picnic table and turns K.C. around so he’s facing me. I mirror him and proceed to feed K.C. as if it’s the most natural thing in the world, like we’ve done this together a thousand times before. We talk as I scoop spoonful after spoonful until K.C. finishes the jar.
I don’t even notice that Rigs is sitting across from us until he clears his throat getting our attention.
“Sorry, Rigs,” I say, embarrassed that I’ve total ignored him.
“Oh, don’t mind me. I think we should get going, though. We have three hours of a drive, remember?” Rig says, smiling back and forth between us.
“Oh yeah. Umm,” I start to say.
“You and K.C. are riding with me. Rigs, you can go ahead if you want,” Kaden says, standing up and shift
ing K.C. around in his arms.
“Sir, yes, sir,” Rigs says teasingly. “I’ll be by to pick you up tomorrow around three o’clock.”
We switch out K.C.’s car seat from Rigs’ truck to Kaden’s and I give Rigs a hug goodbye.
“Thank you for being here for me today. I don’t think I would have been able to do it without your support,” I say to Rigs.
“Anytime, doll. Hey, I got to see my brother, so it was a win-win for me,” Rigs says, pulling Kaden in for a hug.
We stand and silently watch as Rigs pulls away. I show Kaden how to properly strap K.C. into his car seat and we head off to home. My home. Maybe one day our home? I don’t want to look too far ahead, but I really want this to work out. The initial nerves have melted away and all I feel now is pure contentment.
Chapter Eleven
Kaden
Ithink about everything that I know about Alyse and everything I don’t know. We start randomly asking each other questions on the way back to her place.
When talking about my parents, I’m hit with the realization that they are grandparents. They don’t about K.C… how the hell am I going to unload this bit of news? I think about what Alyse had to overcome and had to do all alone.
“How did you tell your grandparents? I mean, I need to tell my folks. Any guidance?” I ask, feeling the palms of my hands suddenly become sweaty.
“Well, I just called them and told them. They were upset at first, especially with what my mother had done. But I assured them I wasn’t going to be like her. I was all in with this baby. They came to visit right after he was born and left knowing I had things under control. I was more nervous about you,” she says.
“I was supposed to go down and visit them for a few days after they got home from traveling. How do you feel about coming with me? Just for a day or two? I know it’s a lot to ask…” I say, glancing over to try to see her reaction.
She squirms a little in her seat, reaching back to touch the top of K.C.’s head. He’s facing backwards, which I learn they need to be for at least the first year. This baby stuff can be overwhelming.
“I need to check with Kat. She’s my diner manager, remember? Today was the first day I’ve ever taken completely off at the diner since Kaden was born. I still want to make sure she’ll be okay. I can’t wait until all these surprise reveals are over. My stomach can’t take it,” Alyse says with a nervous smile.
“I’ll tell them everything beforehand. As soon as I do, though, I know my mom is going to demand to meet you two immediately,” I say with a chuckle.
“I feel really bad now not giving you some kind of heads up,” she says, rubbing her hands up and down her legs.
I reach out to stop her movement and end up entwining her fingers with mine. It feels good. I give them a squeeze and look at her with a soft smile.
“It’s okay, Alyse,” is my only reply.
We finally make it to the diner and Alyse instructs me to pull around to the back. The sun has started to set in the sky. There’s a beautiful orange glow to everything. I can’t believe I’m here with her right now. Seeing her in person again is playing with my emotions. I want to swoop her off her feet and get re-acquainted with her body. The body that I’ve only felt once but is embedded in my brain. Yet, I want to just watch her with my son and remember all the moments I witness between them.
K.C. slept on and off during the drive back so he was ready to play. When I think of babies, I think about crying. Not with K.C. He’s got to be the happiest baby I’ve ever seen. I can’t help but continue to fall in love with him more.
Once we are in her apartment, I’m struck with not knowing what to do. I’m standing right inside the door still holding my rucksack and just staring at her.
She’s like a whirlwind. She has K.C. in a highchair with a few pieces of cereal in a matter of second. Then she’s pulling stuff out of the refrigerator and seemingly putting together something I’m assuming is for dinner.
And I’m still just standing there staring.
K.C. squeals and I hear him calling “Dada.” It’s breaks me from my temporary spell.
“Hey, buddy,” I say, smiling over to him.
Alyse spins around and notices me still standing inside the door.
“Kaden, oh my goodness. Please make yourself comfortable. I’m sorry. I just kind of went into my normal routine. I’m figuring you may be hungry and I usually give K.C. a little snack before his bath and bed. I have a feeling he’s going to be a little off schedule and probably won’t be falling asleep at his normal time tonight. Do you want to take a shower or anything?” she asks as she drops another handful of that familiar circle cereal in front of K.C.
“Yeah, a shower would be wonderful. I need an iron, too. I’m sure the dress shirt I have in this bag isn’t going to be in very good shape. I may need to press my khakis, too,” I say, setting the bag on the floor.
“Pull them out and I’ll press them for you while you are in the shower. Down the hall, first door on your left. There’s towels in the closet. And, umm…I don’t want this to seem like I had anything planned, but just in case, I got some toiletry stuff for men. It’s in the closet, too. Along with a new toothbrush, just in case, “she says as a little blush crosses over her cheeks.
“You don’t have to iron for me,” is all that I can seem to get out. The blush seems to fascinate me and I find myself mesmerized. Then I think about her actually getting me toiletries and I break out in a wide grin.
“What are you smiling about? Get me your shirt and pants and go,” she says, tilting her head as she holds out her hand and looks up at me.
“You got me stuff. Just in case?” I say as I continue to smile. “I like when you blush.”
It comes out sounding stupid, so I clear my throat and unhook my bag to dig through to find my shirt and pants. I pull out a t-shirt and a pair of sweat shorts to change into.
“I like that you like when I blush,” Alyse says, wiggling her fingers for me to hand over my clothes. “And I like your clean-shaven face, but I liked your beard more.”
“It’ll be partially back in a couple days, sweetheart,” I say, smiling.
I hand over my clothes and peck her cheek with a kiss. I walk over to K.C. and blow raspberries on his neck, which is received with a huge belly laugh that sends a burst of joy through me.
“Daddy loves you, little man,” I say as I head down the hall to the bathroom.
As I stand under the steaming hot water, I feel the tension of the day wash away. I look around at the different items in the shower/tub combo. From her various selections of hair and body products, to the same for K.C. I see a net that is stuck on the wall with suction cups that hold various bath toys. Everything neatly in its place. I wash my entire body and run my razor over my head. I go to shave my face and stop. There’s already a little bit of growth from just the last twenty-four hours. Even though I’ll have to shave it off again, I’ll let it go for Alyse until then.
After I’m finished, I dry off and slip on my t-shirt and shorts. Heading back out into the main living area, I see Alyse sitting on the couch with the TV on and K.C. sitting on her lap playing with what looks like a book made out of soft plastic. Alyse is talking to him and flipping through the pages as they both point to different things.
“Feel better?” Alyse says as I nod in agreement. “Sit down and let K.C. show you what he can do. K.C., do you want to show Daddy your book?”
I sit down on the couch and K.C immediately crawls over and sits on my lap. He wiggles until he seems to find a comfortable spot and pats the book.
“Boo,” he says.
Alyse scoots over and says, “K.C. is learning like no other child I’ve ever known. Not that I know a lot. But I’ve read a ton of books and did research. He’s incredibly smart. However, he rarely says more than one syllable words and he sometimes doesn’t finish the end of the word. Like he just said book now but left off the ‘k’ sound. You’ll get used to it. Though, I don’t think
it will last long. It seems like just last week he started forming more words. They grow more every day.”
K.C. grabs my hand and pats the book with it. “Yeah, little man. I see the book. Are you going to read it to me?”
To my amazement, he nods his head and opens it to the first page. It’s a picture book with animals. The first one is a picture of a dog. Alyse says, “What sound does a dog make?”
K.C. immediately lets out a small barking sound and claps his hands. She proceeds to ask him what sound each of the animal’s make in which K.C. correctly makes the sound of each. The chicken had to be my favorite, though. I asked him a few times to make that sound. It came out sounding like buck and was pretty damn cute.
Broken Ties (The Broken Brother Series Book 2) Page 6
