She held her emotions together. He’d just visited the life he’d been ripped from as a teenager, a life he could never have back. She knew seeing his parents again must have been excruciating. She couldn’t imagine. Dad—what I’d give to see you again. As hard as she tried to conceal her emotions, her eyes flooded with tears. She blinked in an attempt to stop the tears from forming. It didn’t work.
He drew her hand closer to him, appearing concerned. “Janie?”
“I don’t mean to cry. I don’t want to make this any harder on you.” Tears spilled over her lashes. “Just hearing about you seeing your parents for the first time in so many years. . .I miss my Dad.”
“It’s my fault he’s not here.” He dropped her hand and threw his leg over his bike. “Your friends are still here. Go with them. I’m not good for you.”
Janie gripped his leg to physically restrain him from leaving. She knew it would never be possible to stop him if he really wanted to go. She didn’t care. She’d lost him once. She refused to let him go again. “It’s no one’s fault. It happened. It was tragic, but it happened. Please. . .I’ve already lost one person I love. I can’t do it again.”
Kai stared forward. “How can you still want me? I’ve only added heartache and complication to your life. Janie—I killed your father. I don’t expect you to get past that.”
“Look at me. Look into my eyes.” He turned to face her. Wet streaks lined his cheeks. “You made me feel again.” He didn’t speak. Am I even getting through to you? “Do you hear me? I feel again. I am no longer numb. You aren’t allowed to carry any more guilt for his death. Do you understand me? No more guilt. He’s gone and I will miss him every day, but you’re still here and I refuse to let you go.” She pushed him. He blinked. Another tear trickled down his cheek.
“Why won’t you talk to me? Are you leaving?” She waited. His forehead crumpled. He looked away again. “Damn you.” She breathed out. Her heart felt as if it had been ripped from her body. “Do what you have to do. I’ll say this once and then I’m leaving. You’ll never have to see me again. I’ll never be a source of your guilt again. You can live without having to look at me every day.” Out of breath, she said, “For what it’s worth, I. . .I love you.”
She turned to run away, but her legs didn’t budge. She pried her feet from the ground and left him sitting on his bike, speechless. Is that all I meant to him?
Janie let her tears fall to the pavement. She raised her head to make sure her friends were still there to drive her home, but she didn’t see them—Kai blocked her view. She stumbled to a halt. He snatched her up, embracing her tighter than he’d ever done before. “Without you, I don’t want to live.”
She drew back from him. “Do you mean it? Don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”
“More than I’ve ever meant anything.” He combed her hair back and held her head tightly within his grasp. “I love you.”
She choked out the question she had to know the answer to in order to move forward. “Are you leaving?”
His eyes traced every line on her face. She could feel his breath on her lips as he took her in. “My heart is here, with you. If you’ll still have me?”
Janie laughed and cried at the same time. Relief washed over her, along with an unequivocal need to be close to him. “Can we please get out of here?” She peeled her high heels off. “Now.”
“Where do you want to go?”
“I’m yours tonight and every night, forever.” She rose up on her tiptoes, her hands clutching his shirt in her fists. “Your house,” she said softly.
Kai flipped her up into his arms and placed her on the back of his bike. He removed the helmet from the back and handed it to her. “This is going to be a quick ride.”
“Whatever gets us there fastest!” She ran her hands up his chest, stretching to get her arms around his neck. He bent forward and kissed her. She grasped his collar and lowered him down onto the bike.
“Let’s go.” Without another word he spun around, straddled the bike and booted the kickstand. Janie wrapped her arms around his waist and held him tightly. The bike lurched forward.
In the morning, Janie ran her bare legs up and down his satin sheets, his arms still wrapped around her. She smiled and tightened her arm over his.
“You’re awake,” Kai said. Goose bumps formed along her skin.
She rotated to face him. “How long have you been awake?”
“Awhile.” He brushed a kiss over her nose. “I’ve been thinking.”
She examined his morning look. His perfectly disheveled mess of wavy golds and whites fanned out around his dark pillow. She plucked the tangled ribbons of white highlights out with her eyes. “What are you thinking about?”
“We’re good for each other.” He kissed her forehead and flipped onto his back. He stared at the ceiling, exposing his crisscrossed scar. Janie traced it with her fingers, waiting for him to finish. “Neither of us was looking for love. Actually, we both tried to stay as far from it as possible, and look what happened.”
Janie rested her head on his chest. “You just had to come into the alley that night. Otherwise, who knows, we may have never met. We would have stayed lonely, miserable fools forever.”
He held up his hand. “You’re forgetting. You tried to run me over with your car. You initiated our encounter.”
She weaved her fingers through his. “Really? You didn’t have any interest in me. You only wanted my kill.”
He laughed. “Who, Mr. Muscles and the newbie?” He became more serious. “I noticed you before that evening. I have a confession to make.” She eyed him interestedly. “I followed you home that first night, after you ran into the pole.” He rolled onto his side to face her. “It wasn’t a coincidence that we met in the alley.”
“Let me guess. You followed me there, too?”
“I was curious, intrigued by you. And you were so damn frustrating in the alley, and the night in the parking garage, and pretty much every night after that.”
“You weren’t exactly a bowl of cherries yourself. You almost let me ride the bus home with a poisonous demon splint in my head.” On instinct she touched her head.
He placed his hand over hers. “I wouldn’t have really let you go.” He paused. “It didn’t matter. I knew you would stay.”
“Oh, really, Mister Confident.” She pushed him backward.
He wrapped his arms around her. “I’m a catch, a dysfunctional mess, but a catch.”
“That makes two of us. . .well, the dysfunctional part.” She gladly accepted his embrace. “So what’s next, I mean, with Tavares?”
“He’ll continue his quest to create a new type of vampire. You stopped him from succeeding in Baltimore. You did your job.”
“And Jerome, what’s going to happen to his gang?”
“I heard Tanya took over as head vamp.”
Janie mused. “That should be good. I like her.” Janie thought about the last time she saw Tanya. If it weren’t for her, she’d be dead. “By the way, thanks for getting my dagger back for me after Tanya beheaded Caleb.”
He smiled. “I know how important it is to you.”
She stared at the blank TV on the wall. “You know, I’m leaving in less than a year. I don’t know what city they’ll put me in next. I don’t want to lose you.”
He directed her chin over to meet his stare. “Janie—you aren’t going to lose me. We’ll work it out. And don’t completely write off Baltimore yet. Quinn has taken charge of Antony’s crew. Baltimore still needs you. Tanya’s going to need you.” He skimmed her lips with his. “I will always need you.”
“Baltimore needs us,” Janie said.
“Us—” Kai rolled her onto him and kissed her.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Taryn Browning graduated with a BS in Education from Towson University and went on to earn a MS in Reading from Hood College. She lives in Virginia with her husband, two young sons and their dog. When she's not writing, she enjoys reading, spe
nding time with friends and family, dancing, music, movies, and the beach. Visit her at www.tarynbrowning.com, on twitter and facebook.
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