Sexy Witch is a personal mission with a cultural context. The path you will discover within these pages is unique to you. A combination workbook, spell book, and informational guide, each chapter of Sexy Witch offers you the opportunity to move deeper into the process of deconstruction and then reconstruction of your relationships with your body, your sexuality, your sense of self, and your sense of power and empowerment. Sexy Witch offers you a process by which to establish your intuitive understanding of how you work, and what works for you. Through working Sexy Witch, you will be initiated into the mysteries of your own body, psyche, and power. You are the Priestess here, and yours is the Temple. Build it. Honor it. Enjoy it!
Deconstruction: To take apart, in this case for the sake of examination and to prepare for reconstruction. I am not referring specifically to literary Deconstructionist theory.
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Matrix: Womb, starting point, context.
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Androcentric:
Male-centered.
Within these pages I offer a cultural context for the experiences that, as women, we nearly universally face. From body shame to body acceptance, from genital shame to pussy pride, from overall sexual fear and disempowerment to creation of a healthy matrix for personal empowerment, the roots of our causes of wounding and our potential for healing are becoming more and more exposed.
In Sexy Witch you will learn about the underpinnings that create an atmosphere supportive of our continued shame, and you will learn how to break free from that atmosphere. You will learn how androcentric culture has historically created self-supporting belief systems designed to stabilize the status quo. You will learn how everything from fashion to medicine and medical theory have been used as part of a system designed to keep women “in their place.” And, you will learn about the work that women have done throughout history to overcome this oppression.
Perhaps more importantly you will also learn, through exercises, journaling, and ritual, how these cultural stories have shaped the person you are today. You will have the opportunity to explore where your early experiences (imprinting) and personal history (yourstory!) have created more personalized complexes of emotion and behavior. You will also see where these meet up with our cultural biases, and where they don’t. You will have the opportunity to mine your own depths, and to transform coal into diamond. You will be offered the power to rebuild your worldview in ways that work specifically for you, and you will emerge from this experience with the ability to move beyond any limitations that you do not choose to maintain.
While Sexy Witch includes elements of cultural and feminist theory, this book is not about blame, and it is not designed to get you angry and leave you that way. My hope is that through offering a metaperspective of cultural influence, we can begin to release our feelings of responsibility for the multitude of conditions that allow our wounding while also claiming the power to heal those wounds.
Through claiming our wounds, we also claim our power to heal. Freed from our attachments to titles like “victim” and “survivor,” we may find empowerment based in a healthy sense of personal awareness, power, and self-actualization rather than empowerment based in victimization.
It is important to recognize that all of us—woman, man, boy, and girl—are trapped in this cultural game. The experience varies from vantage point to vantage point, but we all have our programs. Or rather, the program has us.
Metaperspective:
A massive overview that takes the whole picture into account.
• • •
Manifestation:
To bring into existence, or that which has been brought into existence.
As we begin to see this cultural fabric, we may become more able to recognize how some of our wounds are founded in it, and how the wounds of others arise from these same sources. At that point perhaps, at least to an extent, we can globalize those wounds. In doing so, we may see how healing ourselves can be a radical, magickal, and revolutionary act. Becoming healthy, strong, and empowered may be the most revolutionary, and perhaps evolutionary, act we can engage in.
So, I wrote Sexy Witch for me, for you, and in the hope of leaving this world a better place for the children (yours, mine, ours), and their children, and their children’s children. May we all grow strong, resourceful, and healthy.
Some Words About Words
Words are powerful. We must recognize this in order to be truly effective in our goals and manifestation. Words and how we use them—or don’t use them—also have an amazing ability to shape thought, culture, and our personal realities.
Wiccan:
A widely practiced denomination of Witchcrafting.
I feel that the roots of words are interesting and important, but truly, a whole book could be written on the origins and evolution of just a handful of the words you will see within these pages. However, for the sake of clarity and understanding, I feel the need to define at least a couple of words you’ll be seeing a bit of here: sexy and Witch.
When operating from a healthy and self-defined space, it is possible to know that the word sexy is about a feeling, an attitude. Throughout this book you will have many opportunities to find out what sexy means to you, and in the knowing of it, you will gain more power to claim your own desire and the personal power of sensuality and sexiness.
This book is not focused on “how to get your man” or “becoming a Goddess in the bedroom,” though these may be pleasant side effects of the work you do here. Instead, the magick you will work chapter by chapter is designed to bring you into your power as an individual, as a woman, as a sensual and sexual being, and as a Witch.
The word Witch is a word that is often misunderstood, so I want to make very clear my intended meaning. The word Witch may come from any number of root words. Many linguistic historians believe the word Witch has Indo-European roots, and came from words meaning anything from “pliant branches” to “village” to “sorcerer.”1 At this moment, my main desire is to clarify how I use the word Witch, not to create a map of why.
I am not Wiccan, though many of my teachers along the way have been. My magickal practices are infused with a Wiccan flavor, but are also influenced by many other traditions. My spiritual orientation is very eclectic, and Sexy Witch draws upon all the teachings that have formed my magickal relationship with reality. My style of magick-working—and my relationship with magick in general—is what I term “intuitive.” The magick you will work in this book is primarily intuitive magick.
When I use the word Witch, I mean magick-worker, magickian, mage, Priest/ess, God/dess, mother, sacred whore. (Whore is another interesting and magickal word, which I delve into in Appendix II: A Compendium of S/heroes.) I mean a worker of magick so attuned to her intuitive relationship with herself that she does bend and shape reality, whether she consciously decides to or not. (And I do hope that through this work we will all gain some ground on being more capable of consciously deciding to create our lives.)
The title Witch is not, in my opinion, one that is conferred, but one that is claimed. I claim it, and I offer you the freedom to do the same.
While we’re on the subject of words, I may as well address the “magick” versus “magic” spelling choice. The magick spelling first came into use during the 1940s or so. This new spelling was used to delineate between “real” magick and parlor magic, as in magic tricks. For many practitioners, the spelling has stuck. The magick spelling is most commonly used in the Ceremonial Magick and Thelemic communities, but is widely used throughout the whole magickal community.
How to Work This Book
Sexy Witch can be worked alone, or you can create a group focused on sharing the process of self-discovery. If you want to share this process with your best girlfriends, you will find a series of rituals in part 2 titled “Rituals II: Rituals for Circles of Sexy Witches.” This
section will guide you and your crew in facilitating the rituals in a group setting.
If you prefer to work this transformation solo, part 2 also includes a section titled “Rituals I: Rituals for the Solo Sexy Witch.” This is a ritual guide designed to facilitate you in honoring your own transitions in ritual space.
Before diving into the chapters and the work at hand, I suggest that you read the introductory sections of whichever ritual section you will be following (solo or group), and that you read through Appendix I: Recipes, Correspondences, and Other Details You Might Need to Know. If you find yourself wanting more information on any of the ideas or topics presented, check Appendix III: Informational Resources to find starting points for your additional research.
Also, while you may have performed some of the exercises included in this book in the past, I encourage you to do many, if not all, of the exercises included. With most magickal work, you will gain new information even from the same exercise if used in a different context.
Sexy Witch is modeled on the flow of initiation. Not all of it will be easy, though much of it will be fun, and all of it (even the frustrating parts) will deepen your understanding of yourself. The first four chapters are dedicated to rendering the structure that houses your assumptions. In so doing, you will begin uncovering the roots of your discontent, and creating the space to define the ideal relationship with yourself.
The last three chapters are dedicated to rebuilding a world-view that suits you. In the reconstruction-or
How to Free-Write:
Put pen to paper and write. You can start with a prompt word, or just a topic. Do not stop writing until your time is up. If you get stuck, start again with a new prompt word, or with the one you first started with.
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Mind Map:
A mind map is a map of words on a page, with lines connecting them to one another (figure 1). A mind map can become a great visual representation of how ideas connect in your personal view of reality.
How-To: Write a word in the center of a piece of paper. As you build off the center word, you will create a visual representation of how your mind connects concepts.
iented chapters, you will have opportunities to rebuild your relationship with your senses, to adopt mentors (be they deities, cultural icons, or people you know), and to allow yourself to fully accept, and to dedicate yourself to, the responsibility and joy of living in your sensual, sexual, self-loving, self-nurturing, self-adoring, and self-possessed power.
Each chapter in Sexy Witch includes exercises, activities, and journal pages designed to take you into, and through, your process of transformation and empowerment. Throughout this book you will also find sidebars full of fun facts, myth and lore, illuminating quotes, and anecdotes that will deepen your experience of each subject covered.
You will need a journal to write in, writing implements that you enjoy using, and some art supplies. All journaling prompts should be completed in your journal so you can keep track of your progress and so you will be able to look back over it later if you feel the desire to do so. All art-related activities will have complete lists of any supplies that are needed.
Figure 1: Mind Map
Journaling prompts are on-topic words or phrases that are designed to be a starting point for your process of discovery through writing. This writing is really just for you, unless you want to share it with others. It’s not about skill or readability, but about mapping your own internal terrain regarding the personal discoveries that may come up while working this book. Your writing may be pages of prose, or it may be poetry, scrambled scrawling, or even clusters of single words. It is not about the appearance of it, it’s about getting at the depth we can reach when we begin to attempt to listen to our own inner voice.
The exercises and rituals for each chapter build on what was achieved in the previous one, so each chapter should be completed before moving on to the next. Each chapter is designed to be worked for one week. If you wish to take longer than a week in working a chapter, that is entirely up to you (and your crew, if you are working the book with others). However, I do suggest that you allow yourself at least seven days per chapter.
At the beginning of each week, I recommend that you read through the whole chapter. After you have read the chapter in full, go back and perform the exercises as the week progresses. Some will be assigned for the whole week, and those will be listed at the beginning of each chapter. If you don’t get through all the reading on the first day of your new Sexy Witch week, you can hop ahead and begin your work immediately.
Now, Sexy Witch, read on, and enjoy the journey!
[contents]
1 Stav Academy Library, http://www.stavacademy.co.uk/mimir/witch.htm.
part one
The Chapters
chapter one
Your Body Is a Temple
★ Daily Practice: Little Rituals Everywhere, page 20.
Your Body Is a Sacred Space
Your body is a sacred space. Maybe you’ve heard this sentiment before. Even if you have, chances are you have never quite believed it. But here it is: your body is the dwelling place of everything that makes you who you are. Your body is home to the amazing physiological and evolutionary alchemical magick that has created you, wholly unique and individual. Written in ancient code, our DNA carries secrets still undiscovered. Your body is a living ark, holding ancient stories encoded in your very cells.
More than merely a home to your heart and soul, your body is your heart and soul. And, your body is—in a profound way—your mind. The body and mind are not two things, separate and divisible, but one thing. The mind is a process, not an object. It is the amazing, synchronous magick of nerves, tissues, synapses, hormones, minerals, and molecules working in concert. Memory, desire, choice, and action are all born of the miraculous dance that is every cell in your body doing exactly what it is meant to do.
Alchemy: A magickal process of transformation that can change the composition of elements.
• • •
Systemic: Pertaining to a whole system. In this case, pertaining to your body as a system.
Creating change in your body can create instantaneous change throughout the dynamic, living system that is your body/mind/ spirit. Your entire being—your history, your potential, and your amazing ability to overcome adversity and create revolutions of evolution—may well be encapsulated in your very cells. And, changing the way you think may be the most effective way to create transformation immediately and effortlessly. Remember, thought is an adaptive physiological process replete with systemic feedback. It may be easier than you would think to create a new pattern to the flow.
Our bodies are the vehicles by which we manifest our Will on earth, and they are even more than that. Our bodies are the point of interface where the individual meets up with the rest of creation. In this chapter we will create ways to honor and sanctify this amazing, dynamic vessel that is our most unique and valuable temple.
Magickal Act: Visiting the Temple
A Magickal Thought: If you can change your mind, you can change anything.
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Guided Visualization: A technique that is used to great effect in counseling, sports, motivational speaking, and even medicine. Guided visualization is also a basic tool for ritual and magick.
This is a guided visualization. If you are not yet familiar with guided visualization, the exercise may take some getting used to. Or it may come naturally to you. Either way, as a Witch it is important to hone your skills of visualization, inner vision, creation, and exploration. The ability to journey inside yourself is a wonderful skill to have, and honing the ability to visualize is one of the most important things you can do to become effective in magick, and even in daily life.
During a guided visualization, you may see a series of images, or you may have the visualization
run in your mind like a story line or dream, as one continuous flow. Cultivate nonattachment to how your visualization will present itself. Allow images to morph, flow, and change. If you find your mind blank for a moment, allow that blank spot in your journey to exist, and then to pass. Relax into the exercise, and allow yourself to just stay present with the process.
As with any exercise, the more you work on visualization, the more easily it will happen for you. If you feel less than satisfied with the results of a visualization the first time you try it, perform the exercise again. You could also record your voice reading the script, and use that recording.
What You Will Need
• Time. Visualization: five minutes; writing and art: twenty minutes, or as long as you want.
• Space where you will be uninterrupted.
• Your favorite art supplies.
• Journal.
• Writing implements.
• Pillow (optional).
• Blanket (optional).
• Incense (optional).
• Essential oils (optional).
• Fresh flowers (optional).
How-To
For this and other visualization exercises, you will need a space that is peaceful, quiet, and private. Create a time and space that’s just for you, where you will be uninterrupted and able to focus. In this guided visualization, you will visit your temple. After this journey you will paint, draw, collage, sculpt, or otherwise craft an artifact representing your temple, or an image of it. Next you will journal about the visualization, and about creating the artifact, if you choose to. Prepare all the supplies you will need before you begin the exercise. Have paper, writing implements, and art supplies ready. As much as possible, stay in the visualization while you get it down on paper.
Sexy Witch Page 2
