“She was,” he said with a bittersweet smile, his shoulders slumping. “And now I’m back to being alone.”
“No, you’re not,” I said, locking eyes with him. I placed my head opposite his. “I’m here for you.”
Max reached out touch my cheek with the back of his hands. His weather-beaten knuckles gently rasped against my skin. His grey eyes seemed like a pair of blizzards that were even more intense. I leaned in to get a better look at them. So much passion and pain swirled in each iris. Our lips were just millimeters from each other. I wanted to ease the tension and pain in his beautiful grey eyes.
Then, we kissed.
His lips were as warm and welcoming as the fireplace he tended. Max made the log burning in the hearth seem like a mere firecracker. The man’s body was like a wildfire setting the forest of my heart ablaze.
In these cold days, I had forgotten what it was to be truly safe and warm. It wasn’t just thick clothing or a good heating system that kept a person warm. It was the warmth that came from love and companionship.
I felt him grasp the sides of my face with both hands. Max kissed me even deeper with his tongue holding down mine like depressor. My fingertips traced the muscular panes of his bare chest.
Suddenly, he broke away from me. Conflicted emotions clouded his grey eyes. I almost blurted out a ‘sorry’ before holding my tongue. I honestly didn’t know what to say that would make the situation less awkward.
For a moment, there was only silence except the howl of wind outside.
“I’m heading to the garage,” he said, avoiding my gaze. Max went to get dressed. It felt like he was putting on a piece of armor to shield himself from me. “Do you need anything from your car?”
I was as flush as a strawberry. “No, I’m good.”
Max went into the garage and disappeared for a better part of an hour. I made some hot dogs for us it. I let the links stew in the pot while I fished through the pantry for toppings. They were easy enough to make. It gave me time to think about our relationship.
And rehearse a hundred different apologies.
I didn’t know what exactly I felt for Max. It was a mix of admiration, attraction, and empathy. I felt as much love a woman could for a man she had just met. Yet, I respected the pain that still lingered in his heart. It felt callous to pick at it while it still healed.
Max returned when I finished laying the hotdogs on their buns. “Do you want anything special on yours?”
“Smells good,” he said, breathing in the aroma of the freshly cooked food. “Just ketchup, mustard and relish. I’m not too fancy about what I put on meat in tube form. I picked it up from Maria. Germans like having as little garnishing on their sausages as possible.”
I handed him his hotdog. “Okay, just the essentials for you.”
“Thanks,” he replied, immediately chowing down on his hotdog. “Tastes great.”
The two of us sat and ate together. We talked about everything except for the awkward kiss we had mere moments ago. If anything, avoiding the subject made me think about it even more about the gorgeous man next to me.
My nipples grew hard but it wasn’t from the cold. I imagined his hand cupping my breasts and pinching hard on them. I wanted to kiss his warm lips again. I wanted him to suckle my lower lip before plunging his tongue deep into me.
Finally, Max broke the awkward silence and my perverse thoughts. “I supposed we should talk about what happened earlier, Emily.”
“I just keep saying stupid stuff,” I sighed, wanting to crawl into a hole and disappear. “You must think I’m the worst guest ever.”
“No, the worst guest I ever had was a traveling salesman who tried to sell me a used ottoman,” he laughed. I joined in a girlish giggle. I was relieved that the tension was somewhat relieved between us. “You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. You’re a lovely, charming girl.”
I shot him a look of disbelief. “You really think so?”
“I never lie to a lady. Eagle’s honor.”
I sucked in my lower lip. “But I’m not beautiful like Maria.”
“I had my romance with Maria… but it’s time to move on,” he said, shaking his head. “That’s what she would’ve wanted… but you deserve better, Emily. You deserve someone better than a shell of a man…”
I almost wanted to laugh. The biker didn’t know just how gorgeous and charismatic he was. I guessed it was a side effect of living by himself in the middle of nowhere. This place probably didn’t get it share of young women in need of a handsome boyfriend.
“But I want you, Max,” I replied, placing a hand on his cheek. I felt it slowly swell and deflate under my fingers. “You’re the kindest man I have ever known.”
I tugged at the neck of his t-shirt. I saw the toned musculature peeking over the rim of his shirt. My eyes trailed down to his groin.
In turn, I began to unbutton my shirt. I revealed my bra-clad breasts to him. Taking off my shirt, I began to remove my sweat pants as well.
Suddenly, Max reached out to stop my hand. “We can’t do this, Emily. I don’t want you to do this out of a sense of obligation. I may be your savior… but I can’t be your lover.”
“I don’t think of you as just my savior,” I replied, feeling his grip loosen around my hand. “At first, I wasn’t sure I could even trust you. I’ve always had a thing against bad boys. But you’ve shown me that you’re more than a leather jacket and a bike strapped to a pickup jeep.”
He started to speak. “Emily-“
But I silenced him with a finger before pressing my body against him. Taking off my finger off his mouth, I replaced it with my lips. Our mouths became locked in a passionate kiss. His tongue yearned for more but I broke it off before he got what he wanted. “I need you, Max.”
He stared at me as if lost in a daze. I wondered if old memories of Maria flooded back into his mind. They had been through much together. Max had fought for her. He had even left the motorcycle club that raised him to start a new life with her.
Max looked like he had lost a limb. It was the same look I had seen in war veterans. When I was younger, I had volunteered in nursing homes and halfway houses for soldiers returning from wars. It wasn’t an unusual sight to see them come back missing an arm or a leg. Sometimes, they would continue to fell pain in their toes or fingertips in the missing limb. It was called phantom pain and it was said to be a trick of the mind. Nonetheless, the look of loss was there on Max’s face.
I wasn’t vain enough to think I could replicate the passionate romance they shared. I was like a camp fire compared to the wildfire that was Maria. Nonetheless, I wanted to comfort Max and keep his heart warm.
“I’ve always been afraid to care about other people, Emily,” he sighed. “Life was so cheap back when I was with the Steel Eagles. The people you knew could die at any moment. I could wind up dead. People I knew could wind up joining a rival club and fighting against me. There wasn’t any point in getting close to anyone I knew. Yesterday’s friend could be tomorrow’s enemy.”
“Then you met Maria…”
“When I saw your car, I was tempted to leave you there,” he said, looking away. His forehead became tinged with shame. “I didn’t want to get close to anyone else ever again. But I couldn’t after what had happened to Maria and Michael. I thought about just getting you to where you needed to go before never seeing you again.”
“But you didn’t,” I said with a smile. With a finger under his chin, I turned his head to face mine. “You gave me a place in your home. Now, if you can manage it… I’d like a small piece of me in your heart.”
Max tugged the side of my pants. “I can.”
I didn’t bother resisting as he picked up my body and gently laid it on the couch. He pulled my pants down my legs. My bra and panties soon followed.
Max’s hands caressed the side of my body before moving up to cup my breasts. I leaned in for a hard kiss. Soon, I locked my hands around his neck and pulled him into a deeper kiss. I fel
t his palms grope my ass as our tongues tangled.
Breaking away for a moment, my lover leaned over to kiss my tender breasts. I let out a lingering sigh as he suckled a nipple before moving onto the other one. “Oh… Max…”
Down under, I felt his hand massage my thighs. He relieved me of any tension that remained in me. I could feel his knuckles brush up against my wet sex.
I brought my legs together around his hand. It wasn’t to hold him back. It was just the opposite. I wanted him to go deeper. Indeed, Max began to play with my stiff clit.
In fact, he played me like a piano. He would open up my legs by sucking my tits. A gentle nibble would spring my thighs wide open. My pussy was as wet as the saliva dripping down his chin.
Max entered my very wet sex. My body immediately grew stiff as if someone had put puppet strings on me. I shivered in feverish delight. My vision got momentarily blurry but I could make out Max’s grey eyes.
The pierced my soul as he questioned me. “You love this, don’t you?”
I stuttered as if grasping wildly for intelligible words. “I- yes… oh!”
He turned on the heat by pinching harder on my nipple. “I’ll ask you again, do you love this?”
“I love it!”
He squeezed even harder. “Say it again!”
“I love it!”
“Say it like it’s your sermon!”
I screamed at the top of my lungs. “I fucking love it! I love you!”
I practically tackled the larger man onto the couch. Pressing myself flush against him, I straddled his hips. I bent back like a bow and placed on my hands on his chest for balance.
Taking charge again, Max flipped me onto my back in one swift motion. After taking off his clothing, he gripped both of my calves. Placing my legs above my shoulders, I felt his shaft touch the lips of my sex. He rubbed it against my body without ever entering me. I didn’t have to guess what was coming next.
Gently, he entered past the soft flesh of my slit. I reached down with a hand to help guide his cock. For a moment, he stopped and rubbed the sides against the lips of my sex in a circular motion. I wondered if this was how Maria liked to have sex. I found that it pleased me as well.
The look in Max’s eyes suggested he had the same thoughts. Nonetheless, the biker regained his focus and locked his eyes with mine. That’s when I noticed that tears were rolling down my cheeks. Making love to Max was almost like a religious experience.
He went deeper into me as my moistness overwhelmed him. I felt as fragile as a porcelain doll before such a powerful man. Yet, I knew Max would be gentle and considerate with me. I almost wanted to laugh at how I had fallen so hard for a bad boy.
“Make love to me, Max,” I said breathlessly, tugging at his muscular body. “I want you inside of me!”
My eyes opened wide when he placed his shaft at my opening. I arched my back and my toes dug into the soft cushioning of the couch. It pulled him downward against me. Little by little, his cock sheathed itself inside of my sex.
I convulsed like a mental patient. Only Max’s strong, heavy body kept me from falling off the couch. I lifted my feet and dug my heels against his back.
When I calmed down, Max slowly pumped into me. I was wet enough for him to penetrate me with relative ease. Nonetheless, I was still tight as a drawn noose. It didn’t stop my lover from thrusting in and out of me with increasing speed.
Soon, Max began to hit his stride. My body shook violently whenever he drove his prick inside of me. My hips bucked wildly as though I were a mechanical bull throwing off its challenger. However, Max was more than up to the challenge. I punctuated each motion with a soft moan that lingered in the air.
He fucked me with complete and utter abandon. “Oh Emily… God you feel amazing…”
“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me!” I chanted, clutching his back like a drowning woman to a life raft. The sense of euphoria from my climax made me writhe in ecstasy. “Please fuck me, Max!”
I turned my head and ground my cheek against the couch as he came inside of me. My lover groaned and kept plunging into me with his tool. Our bodies shuddered as they both searched for guidance and stability.
With a grunt, Max fell to my side. I let go of his back and allowed him some space on the couch. We were both tired and covered in sweat. The cold and the snow seemed to be a lifetime away. It didn’t take long for us to snuggle and drift into sleep. I felt warm and secure in his arms.
“What does this mean, Max?” I asked. The dynamic of our relationship had changed dramatically in the past few minutes. “For us?”
“It means whatever we want it to mean,” he answered, kissing me soft on the cheek. “For now, just enjoy the moment.”
For the first time since I met him, there was a genuine look of peace on Max’s face.
I awoke in a different bedroom. It was where Max slept. He must have picked me up and placed me there by his side.
Looking through a nearby window, the blizzard looked fiercer than ever before. Max and I had hoped it would die down and we could go out for more supplies. It didn’t seem like we were leaving anytime soon.
However, the sight of Max convulsing beside me on the bed cut my thoughts short. I saw him toss and turn under the blankets without ever opening his eyes. It was as if a he couldn’t break out of a nightmare. I heard him mumbles words that unmistakably sounded like ‘Maria’ and ‘Michael.’
I grasped his shoulder and shook him. “Max? Are you okay? Max! Talk to me!”
His eyes opened wide before shutting themselves again. He seemed almost blinded by the light. Max wiped the sweat of his brow before focusing on my face. “Emily?”
I couldn’t help but feel that he had mistaken me for Maria. “You were having a nightmare, Max.”
With tears in his eyes, his next words confirmed it. “I thought she was alive and I left her out in the cold…”
I rocked his head back and forth. “It’s okay. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. You don’t have to act like a tough guy around me.”
He didn’t hide his emotions as I cradled him in my arms. We didn’t talk but instead communicated through our actions. I held and comforted him as if he was a lover of ten years.
Our night of passion had changed our relationship. Maria may have comforted him and patched him up emotionally when the pain of the past reared its head. Now, she was gone and it was up to me to help Max. He had been my savior but he needed some saving of his own.
Finally, Max spoke after brushing his knuckles against the side of my nude body. “That was some night we had.”
“More like a lunch break,” I replied with rosy cheeks. I caught a glimpse of myself in a nearby mirror. My hair was a total mess and I looked like I had one wild bedtime encounter. Then again, it was completely true. “Damn, we slept past dinner. At least we got plenty of rest.”
Max gave me look of longing. “I wish I had dreams about you.”
I bit my lower lip before speaking. “But I wasn’t in it. It was Maria, right?”
He nodded. “And it scares me.”
“A dream scares you?” I said incredulously. “It’s just some electrons firing off in your brain. It’s all in your head.”
“No, it’s not that,” he sighed. “I’m afraid of letting my guard down again.”
“I don’t understand, Max…”
“I’m afraid of letting of falling in love again,” he answered, regaining his composure. Max seemed to be drawing strength from my support. “I put on the same emotional armor I wore during my days at the Steel Eagles. I was afraid to get close to anyone again. I would go for weeks without any real human contact. I just didn’t want to get hurt again. But I can’t deny the feelings I have for you, Emily. You’ve stripped me of my armor.”
SAVIOR: A Motorcycle Club Romance Page 4
