by Dani Jace
Ray’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he took her hand. “I’m so sorry, Dahlin’.”
“Old news.” She tightened her fingers in his.
“I came home from school and found Mom crying. She said my dad called and told her he wasn’t coming back. All his clothes and things were gone.” He grimaced. “I turned around and did pretty much the same thing to you. Wasn’t my intent, I just thought you wanted me gone.”
She shook her head. “Never.” She brushed his knuckles with a kiss. “I felt like I deserted Bobby and you by leaving for college after Dad died.”
“It’s not the same.”
“Isn’t it? Maybe not the leaving part, but I didn’t come home to visit because it hurt too much to leave again.”
“Really. I thought you were having so much fun you didn’t want to come back.” He pulled the truck into the parking lot of a café and cut the engine. Then flipped up his shades.
She didn’t want to be seen as weak. “I’m sorry.”
“We’ve all made decisions and done things we regret. Clean slate?”
The second she learned he’d been at her graduation, she’d forgiven him. Saving her from Vic earned him a free pass for life. She leaned over and hugged his neck. “Of course.”
He held her for long seconds then helped her from the truck.
Inside, they sat at a booth by a window.
“Will you be able to pick your days to work for Joel?” He picked up a menu. “It’d be nice if he’d schedule your lessons for the days I’m on shift. Until you’re assigned a station.”
The worst scenario would be if she wound up on a different rotation than him. There might be days they wouldn’t be home at the same time. She scanned a list of burgers and sandwiches. “He said he would plan my schedule around the hours I’m available. So where does Craig work? You said he’s on days for now.”
“He works dispatch for the county and is on rotating shifts like the police. There’ll be times when neither of us will be at the house. Will you be okay?” He frowned.
Their server appeared and took their orders. “I’m not scared, if that’s what you mean. What if he brings over a date? Isn’t it awkward for you guys?”
“The extra room has a sofa and TV to double as a den.”
She’d never toured the house beyond the living areas and his bedroom. They had spent nearly all of their time at the cottage. A place they’d never set foot in again. Hurt welled deep in her chest. It may have only been a house, but was her home and filled with precious memories.
After their drinks arrived, a short, barrel-chested man approached their table. Ray stood and offered a sturdy handshake. “Sam.”
“Ray. How’ve you been? Heard you got on at Station Fifty-One.” He returned the grip.
“A little over a year now. You still volunteering at up at Carova?”
The older man’s eyes crinkled. “Yeah. Don’t want to give it up just yet. Gets me out of the house and away from some of the honey-dos since retiring.” He laughed.
“Sam, this is Jo.” His hand slid across the top of her shoulders.
She offered her hand.
“Ma’am.” He nodded and glanced at Ray. “I think this one’s got you, kid.” He passed her a quick wink.
“You’re right.” He grinned.
“Bring Jo to the station sometime. We love having company. I volunteer on Tuesday and Thursday until around three.”
“Will do.”
Their food arrived and the men said their goodbyes.
“So how many times did you work at Corolla?” Jo unrolled her napkin.
“Enough to know the key code to get in. Most of the time the house is vacant.” He raised his brows and reached for the beer parked in front of him.
“Is that an invitation or fantasy?” Hope welled in her chest.
After sipping his brew, a scant smile did little to cover the worry clouding his eyes. “Maybe both.”
“Might be a place to try something new.” She gave him a shy smile.
He exhaled slowly and cleared his throat. “Think I’d prefer a place where buzzers wouldn’t be going off in the middle of our fun.”
She loved shocking him and dug into her double cheeseburger. “So once we rebuild the house, are you going to move in?” She swiped a fry in catsup.
“It wouldn’t surprise me if Bobby and you aren’t offered a handsome sum for the property. It’s prime beach real estate, you know.” He cocked his head.
The French fry didn’t make it to her lips.
“Damn.” She’d never considered selling. She was adrift in the world, except for the hunk across from her.
“I’m sorry, Jo.” He rubbed his forehead. “Today was supposed to be fun and help you forget everything for a while. So far I’m O and two.”
“Don’t worry, Hemanus.” His gesture made her heart squeeze. “Penny’s Hill might even the score.”
“We can ride around it, but they’ll cite us if they catch us driving on it.” He tempted her with one of his fries.
She nabbed it along with his finger, then said, “Wouldn’t want you to lose your special permit.” Maybe she could coax him to the vacant fire station for some illegal fun. They could both forget their problems.
* * * *
Ray picked a playlist from his music player before he put the truck in four-wheel drive. They left the paved road at Corolla and traveled along the beach.
Back at the restaurant, she’d made it clear she wanted him. Any other time, he would have parked the truck between the dunes, sipped her sweet pussy and then sink into her tight body to take them both to heaven. If he were positive his dick would cooperate, he’d go for his firehouse fantasy as the place was probably vacant.
After a few miles, they reached Carova. Penny’s Hill was the second largest dune on the Outer Banks, and surrounded by a cluster of rough dunes nicknamed the badlands.
Foreplay/Long Time by Boston began to play.
Jo grinned. “Oh, my God, I can’t believe you remember Dad playing this.”
“Transports you back in time, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah, like every time I catch a whiff of coconut pie or Chanel Nº5, I think of your mom.” She snickered.
“For me, it’s cheap cologne and cigarettes.” He gave her an eye roll.
“And nail polish!” They both blurted at the same time laughing.
While his oldies playlist shuffled through songs, they reminisced about carefree days when only the waves and her friendship mattered. Although he’d lost his paternal father, he’d gained a true father by fate’s hand and a glimpse into a career field that he eventually chose.
The afternoon burned late and the spring sun edged at the horizon. He drove toward the beach and headed them for home. Along the way, surfcasters fished in the returning tide.
He stopped at Winks for gas. The store’s winking smiley face was another iconic memory into the day’s trip to the past.
“You want a drink?” Jo grabbed her bag.
“Surprise me.” While filling the truck’s tank his cell phone rang. “Have they found him?” he asked Bobby.
“Nate’s on the run with a suitcase of money. Left his high-end dealer with colored aspirin instead of Ecstasy. Now the thugs are hunting the prick along with the DEA.”
“What does that mean for Jo?” He returned the nozzle to the gas pump.
“Hopefully he won’t return and our problem is gone.”
Sounded too easy. With their luck, something was bound to bit them in the ass.
Chapter 44
Before the alarm buzzed, Jo tried for a little action from the big guy, sliding her hand down his belly and into his boxer briefs. His erection flexed against her fingers and gave her hope. As he woke, he quickly halted her assessment and positioned her in a way giving him full access. Protest was not an option as his tongue flicked and tormented her beyond coherent thought, propelling her through a vortex of ecs
tasy and beyond.
While she reconnected her motor neurons to her brain’s synapse, he headed for the shower. She rushed to the kitchen to surprise him with breakfast. Nothing fancy.
He entered with his hair still damp, clean-shaven and smelling of his favorite aftershave. The clean woodsy scent tempted her to tug him back to bed. She handed him a cup of coffee and set a plate with two grilled cheese and bacon sandwiches on the counter.
“Thanks, so what’s on your agenda today?” He sipped at his coffee.
“Return of the recent favor, but I guess that’s out of the question.” She poked out her bottom lip.
“I need to get to the station.” He took his plate, sat on the sofa, and ate while flipping through the TV channels.
“I know.” She came around the bar into the living area. “I’m heading to the grocery store in a bit.”
“Get whatever you think we need.” After finishing his sandwich, he rose, produced his wallet and handed her several twenties. His fingers grazed her cheek while he held her captive with those sensual blue eyes. “Sorry, I’m a little preoccupied this morning.”
She understood, but he wouldn’t let her help. “It’s okay.”
He touched his lips to hers.
She wanted to undo his belt and fly and let her mouth prove he was fine. Instead, her tongue traced the seam of his mouth.
He welcomed her kiss and fed on it as his hands roved over her back. “I love you. Please be careful and check in.”
He’d made it clear, until law enforcement apprehended Nate, she needed to let him and Bobby know her whereabouts at all times. “I love you, too.”
After he left, she considered his reluctance to make love. He’d become her rock. If he suddenly decided he was done with her, she’d crawl in a hole and die. She’d tried not to be too needy. Yes, she’d broken down a time or two, but she’d nearly been killed and left homeless.
The event had possibly taken him back to a former hell or added another. Attempting to talk to him about it would probably start another war. She’d control her female itch and give their love life some time before stirring the pot.
Once she finished tidying the house, she wandered into the spare room, flipped on the TV and powered up Ray’s laptop. Her phone buzzed. She glanced at the display.
Tami. She hadn’t thought to call her with everything going on.
“Hey.”
“You okay? I’d taken Mom and the kids to visit her sister in Virginia. One of the firefighters said it was your house. Why didn’t you call? Where are you?”
“At Ray’s place. Sorry. I’m not supposed to talk about it, legal stuff and all.” She’d blame it on the authorities to avoid the discussion, and whatever reason, her plight shamed her. “Nothing more to tell than what the paper said. It took a full day to replace my driver’s license and bankcards. I picked up a few clothes to get by for now.”
“I’ve got some things that are too small. They’ll probably fit you.”
“Sounds good.”
They agreed to meet later at Papagayos. Her suggested meeting place didn’t surprise Jo. At any rate, she needed to touch base with Harley. Returning to work would take her mind off things, and maybe his DEA buddies had shared some information they weren’t telling Bobby and his crew.
The bar hadn’t opened when she arrived. She walked around to the back and knocked.
Harley opened the door and hugged her. “Come on in. You look good after everything.”
“Black-eyed and the tail a little singed.” She followed him in through the storage area.
“I figured you’d call when you were ready to work.” He stepped behind the bar and flipped on the lights.
“Could you use some help now? Ray’s on shift.” She’d rather work than return to the house and run down the what ifs list.
“Sure.” He pulled a zippered pouch from his pocket and loaded the cash register.
She snagged his keys from the bar, unlocked the front door and returned.
“I still feel bad I wasn’t there for you when you needed me.” He latched his keys onto his belt. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad Ray was.”
Harley apologizing. That was a first. “Good God man, you were in anaphylactic shock.”
“I’ve been bitten by a real Black Widow.” He pointed a finger at her. “Your friend’s venom is worse.”
“She’s just looking for love like the rest of us.”
His gave her partial smile and nodded. “I’m happy you found it, Jo.”
Tami arrived with clothes and a peace offering for Harley, an expensive Harley Davidson vest in black leather.
“Ahh thanks,” he said eyeing her over the bar. After being bitten, Harley’s attempt to be gracious fell short.
“I’m really sorry.” She clasped her hands together. “I hope we can go dancing again sometime.”
He turned to Jo, his dark eyes pleading.
“Thanks for the clothes.” Jo set the box behind the bar. “Have you gotten a call for a station yet?”
Tami shook her head. “We can only hope volunteering will get us a better chance at the couple of openings here on OBX.”
Not great odds and the reason she’d called Joel. She could work on the mainland, but would rather stay close to home. “Yep. Guessing, I’m keeping my night job.” She glanced to Harley.
“That reminds me.” Harley turned for the cash register. “The customers started a tip jar for you.” He handed her what looked like several hundred dollars.
“Wow. Thanks!” She was shocked and humbled.
“They know you’ve been working your ass off to pass the fire academy and volunteering, too.” He slipped behind the doors to the kitchen.
She tapped Tami a beer and chatted until the lunch crowd arrived. Back to work at Papagayos felt as comfy as wearing worn flip-flops. All of her regulars expressed their concern. She enjoyed working here and would probably ask Harley to let her have a couple of shifts now and then even after being assigned a station. She didn’t have an opportunity to talk to him in private until the bar cleared.
“Any news from your friends?” She washed glasses prepping for the after work patrons.
“I’m sure you heard your problem is on the run.”
“Yeah, but Ray’s not convinced.”
“I’m thinking Nate’s hauled ass to save his own. So when’s Ray’s next four days off?” He leaned against the shelves of displayed liquor bottles.
“Next Wednesday. Why?”
“You guys should take off and go somewhere. Get away. He’ll have part of Memorial weekend free.”
“Well, neither of us have been sleeping well. I feel guilty because it’s my fault.” She’d never mention Ray’s lack of desire.
“What you went through was life-changing for both of you. He’s probably going through more shit in his head than you can imagine. Every soldier has trouble sleeping sometimes. Occasionally, there’s trouble with other things. You get my drift?” He inclined his head.
“No problems there.” She turned her attention to the sink of glasses. Maybe it wasn’t her. She’d read a few things about post-traumatic stress. The last thing she needed to do was make a big deal of things.
“Well, it could happen. I’ve been there.” He loaded the cooler with more beer.
“Yeah?” She racked some glasses.
“My fiancée thought I was cheating on her.” He scratched his beard.
Fiancée? Holy shit. “Were you?”
“Not at first, but Allie assumed I wasn’t attracted to her anymore. When I finally fessed up, she didn’t believe stress could leave a man hanging so to speak. It pissed me off she didn’t trust me. I mean fuck, a guy can’t always control shit like that. Anyway, just know if he has trouble, it probably has nothing to do with you. Okay, kiddo?” He patted her shoulder and strode to the end of the bar.
“Thanks.” He hadn’t said so many words in a row since she’d known
him. Guilt and a confession in one conversation.
He grabbed his motorcycle helmet off the shelf behind the bar and headed for the back door. “I need to check on something, I’ll be back before closing.”
“If you get underground info on Nate from your DEA bros, will you cut me in on it?”
“Absolutely.”
Now she needed to figure out a way to let Ray know she understood what might be bothering him.
Chapter 45
How many more days could he pretend? Carefully, Ray snuck into the house after his shift.
Jo’s beauty made his heart hitch. Her petite nose, long lashes, and pouty lips were peaceful in sleep. Carefree waves of amber-blond framed her shoulders. His cock stirred at the partial view of breasts. He eased between the sheets and found her naked except for her panties. The bare curve of her hip enticed him.
Scooting close, he inhaled her clean scent. He ached to be inside her. What if he couldn’t follow through? That would be more embarrassing. The returning nightmares were the same each night. Blood. Hers. His fault. He took a deep breath trying to dispel the gut-wrenching vision. He had to keep his shit in the box to get over this, before she thought he didn’t want her.
She rolled and snuggled against him. Her eyelids fluttered.
He tensed and withdrew.
Her hand smoothed over his back. Soft and loving, her touch soothed him. He swung his feet to the floor. “I need to shower.”
“You don’t smell, baby. Come on. We’re acting like an old married couple.” She knelt behind him and rubbed his shoulders.
His muscles lengthened as her fingers released the tension. He rolled his head, relaxing. “You’re right. I’m sorry.” He hung his head. “It’s not you. It’s me.”
“Whatever’s wrong, I love you. I’m going to keep grabbing you and letting you know I still want you. Really, really bad.” She rimmed his ear with her tongue and reached around to stroke the center of his chest. “Nice cleavage, stud.”
