I interrupt him with a kiss on the mouth. “It’s the same. Let’s talk about us tonight.”
His hand moves to cup my cheek before he gives me another kiss. This one is longer. His touch is softer. “I’ll be back in a few hours.”
“I’ll be gone by then,” I say. “There’s something important I need to take care of today. I’m going to call Eleni. I need to. I don’t care about the money, but I trusted her and she needs to know that she shattered that.”
His eyes search mine for a clue. “If you need backup, I’m an Uber ride away.”
“I need to handle this alone.” I straighten. “It’s important that I do.”
With one last press of his lips to my forehead, he closes his eyes. “You’re my favorite person, Raelyn.”
I bite back my emotions as I close my eyes too. “You’re mine.”
Chapter 25
Calder
I spent the day spreading cheer in the world. That’s a first for me. Instead of rushing around Manhattan frustrated with all the people getting in my way, I smiled at everyone I passed.
I bought coffee for a group of college kids who stopped by their favorite café to load up on caffeine.
Then, I did something that I swore I never would do. I watched my grandpa do it when I was a nine-year-old kid. Christmas was approaching, and instead of giving gifts to my older brother Lennox, Magnolia, and me, he took us down to the grocery store and made us watch him pay for other people’s food.
At the time, I was angry with him.
I wanted a building block set, but he wanted my siblings and me to understand that fate doesn’t cast the same shadow on everyone.
Lennox got the message loud and clear. He used the good that thrives within him to keep the tradition going. Somewhere in this city, he’s probably standing in a grocery store, wearing an expensive suit, and playing Santa to everyone.
He’s a lawyer with the heart of a saint.
Magnolia and I are still getting there. I’m determined to be a better person because I want Raelyn to be proud of me.
That’s not to say that I haven’t sprinkled my wealth around and planted a few seeds in the form of scholarships or donations to worthwhile charities. But, there’s a different peace that settles inside someone when they help a stranger who is down on their luck.
I turn the key in my studio’s lock, hoping that Rae made it back before me. For someone who craved solace a few weeks ago, I never want to be alone again.
I need to temper that need. If I come at Raelyn with the full force of my emotions, I’ll scare her the fuck away.
I slide the door open and blink twice.
This can’t possibly be real.
A Christmas tree is set up in the middle of my studio. It’s decorated with sparkling white lights. I step in and slide the door shut behind me.
Music is playing softly. It’s a Christmas carol that I recognize from the days I used to sing it with my family before opening gifts and diving into our feast.
My gaze shifts to Raelyn.
She’s standing next to the tree. She’s dressed in red. It’s not the pantsuit she had on the night we were formally introduced. This is a dress. The fabric shimmers as the lights from the tree bounce off it.
I approach her with measured, heavy steps. With her arms outstretched, she walks toward me. We meet halfway as I pick her up and spin her in a circle. The skirt of her dress floats around her legs.
“You look like an angel, Rae.”
Her eyes flutter shut before she opens them again. “I hope this is all right?”
Glancing around the studio, I see a table set with a white cloth, two tall white candles, plates, wine glasses, and a pizza box in the middle.
“Dexie told me that’s the best pizza in Brooklyn.” She scrunches her nose. “I may have had a sample bite. I think she’s right.”
Laughing, I kiss her softly. “I can’t believe you did all of this.”
“We’re celebrating.” She moves to slide my jacket off. “Get comfortable, Calder.”
“How comfortable?” I perk a brow.
“Take off the tie. Leave the rest on for now.”
I pout, which lures a laugh from her.
“What are we celebrating?” I question as I gaze into her dark brown eyes.
“My lost painting is found.” She smiles. “I couldn’t have asked for a better gift.”
I lift my brows. “We should celebrate the fact that I found the artist behind that masterpiece. I never thought I would.”
“You were looking for some guy named Ray,” she points out. “If you kept doing that, you never would have found me.”
“You would have found me.” I surprise myself with the words.
“Fate would have shown me the way here.”
I nod. “I like to think that.”
She kisses me. It’s slow, and as she breathes me in, my heart races. “I’m the luckiest man in Manhattan.”
“You wanted to talk about us.” Her breath flows over my cheek. “What about us, Calder?”
I’ve thought about this conversation all day. I’ve searched for the right words and rehearsed what I want to say over and over.
“I’m crazy about you,” I admit. “Don’t ask me how I can feel this much this quickly, but it’s happening.”
Her eyes stay trained on mine. “I’m just as crazy about you.”
“I don’t know what tomorrow is going to bring, and stop me if you think I’m pushing or scaring you.” I pause to catch my breath.
“You’re not scaring me.”
“Yet,” I joke. “I’m only getting started.”
She waits for me to go on.
“I know Amsterdam is still on the table, and even if the appraisals on your paintings come back high, and I’m confident they will, I know you probably crave adventure.” I stare into her eyes. “I’m falling hard for you, Rae, and if your journey takes you across the ocean, I want to visit you. Hell, I want to be with you often as I can because this feeling that’s inside of me is new. I can’t get enough of it or you.”
Tears pool in the corners of her eyes.
“I’m not asking you for anything.” I cup her face in my hands. “I just want a chance. I want to see where this can go, and hell, if it goes the way I think it will, I want a future with you. I want my entire future to be with you.”
I suck in a breath because that is not the fucking speech I prepared. This came from my heart. Laid bare and pounding in my chest, I said what I felt for the first time in my life.
“I’m not going to Amsterdam,” she whispers. “I don’t care if I have to work three jobs like my mom did or paint Christmas ornaments for the rest of my life. I don’t want to go. I want to stay and see if my heart is right because it’s telling me that you are my tomorrow, Calder. I know it’s too soon, but I feel that we were always meant to be. We just took a few detours before we found each other in that snowstorm.”
As if on cue, snow starts falling outside.
Rae glances at one of the massive windows that overlook Manhattan. “I belong here with you, with Dex, with her baby. I want New York City to be my home.”
I test fate and blurt out what I’ve wanted since I saw her on the sidewalk. “I want this to be your home. This studio, the loft, all of it.”
She glances around. “It feels like home, but…”
My stomach clenches in a knot. “Look, if I went too hard, forgive me. I know it’s soon.”
“I’ll stay with Dex and Rocco until the baby is born, and maybe after that, we can talk about me moving in?”
It’s enough for me. It’s more than I deserve. “Agreed.”
“Are you hungry?” She asks, eyeing the pizza box.
“For you, yes.” I slide my hands down her waist. “But, we’ll eat pizza, and then I’m carrying you to our bed.”
Her smile tells me that it will always be our bed. It’s the place we’ll make love, plan our future, and find our inspiration.
&
nbsp; With her head resting on my shoulder, we both stare out at the night sky and the falling snow. “You make me happy, Calder Frost.”
“If that’s all I do in life, I’ll die fulfilled with my purpose.”
She glances up at me. “I’m glad you broke my balls.”
I huff out a laugh. “I am too.”
Chapter 26
Raelyn
My breath hitches in the darkness when I feel Calder slide his nude body over mine.
We both left the table as soon as we finished our pizza dinner. He chased me up the stairs, finally grabbing hold of me just as I made it to the bed.
My dress was pulled off with his strong hands before he knelt between my legs and brought me to the edge over and over. I clawed at his hair as he tasted me. His lips sucked my clit. His fingers stroked my pussy, and when I finally did come, he lapped at me, sending me into another dizzying orgasm.
He whispered that he wanted me to sleep because he was aching to fuck me.
“Raelyn,” he says my name with his lips pressed against my breast. “Your body was made just for me.”
I believe that.
He knows how to touch me, kiss me, and fuck me. I feel things when I’m with him that I didn’t think I’d ever feel. It reaches beyond the bliss of an orgasm. When I come with Calder, I feel it in every part of me.
He glides his fingers over my folds. “You’re wet.”
“I was dreaming about you,” I whisper.
He lets out a deep laugh. “Never stop that.”
“Never.”
His arm slides beneath me, moving me so he can take me the way he needs to. It’s the way I want. Rough, hard, passionately.
I cry out when he pushes into me. I moan when the deep-seated guttural sound comes out of him as he thrusts again and again.
“Calder.” His name falls from my lips in a silent vow.
“So good.” He pumps again and then again, pushing me toward another release.
I grab hold of his shoulders, force him closer to me and kiss him.
“I adore you,” he murmurs against my mouth. “So fucking much.”
With his hand wrapped around my neck, he kisses me hard, leaving an imprint on my soul that I know will be there forever.
***
Two hours later, with his blue robe on, I’m sitting on a bench next to one of the windows in the studio. The snow has stopped, but the blanket of white covering the roofs of the buildings of Manhattan is still there.
I wouldn’t call it a winter wonderland, but it could be the scene from a dream. I stare out at it, determined to save it all to memory so that it will find its way, in some form, into my art.
“This is a fucking vision.”
I look over when I see Calder at the foot of the stairs. He was asleep when I left him. I wanted to finish my Christmas gift for him.
As he approaches, his gaze drifts to the tree. I can see the moment he spots my gift. It’s hanging in the center. It’s the only thing on the tree, other than the string of white lights I draped over the branches earlier.
“That’s for you, Calder.”
“For me?” His hand jumps to the center of his bare chest.
He put on a pair of jeans before he came down to the studio. He looks beautiful with his hair messed from my hands, and his lips swollen from my kisses.
I stand and approach him. “I’ve been working on it whenever I had a chance.”
I watch as he leans in to get a better look at the ornament.
His smile gives way to a laugh. “Is that us?”
I nod. “It’s us.”
He cradles the ornament in his hand. “That’s you with your wool coat. I’m there with my gray scarf. Is that a coffee cup in my hand?”
“Look what’s in my hands.”
He does before turning to face me. “It’s the bag of balls, isn’t it?”
I step closer and reach for the ornament. Carefully removing it from the tree, I look up at him. “Open your hands.”
He does. He stretches his hands out while I place the ornament in them.
With a run of my hand over his cheek, I whisper. “Turn it over.”
His eyes catch mine. “This is exquisite. It’s perfect, Raelyn.”
“The other side has something on it too,” I whisper, trying to control my emotion.
He carefully rolls it in his hands until the other side of the globe comes into view. “Fuck. Wow, Rae. This is fucking everything.”
It is.
It’s my painting laid out on a smaller, breakable canvas. I’m there on the swing, with my hair flying in the wind and the vast field around me. There’s something extra in this version of my self-portrait.
“That’s me,” Calder says with his voice breaking. “I’m pushing you on the swing.”
His eyes meet mine.
We stare at each other, soaking in the pure magic of the moment and this life.
“I’m not alone anymore.” I smile. “You’re there with me.”
“You’ll never be alone again, Raelyn. I’ll always be right beside you.”
Epilogue
Christmas Day
Raelyn
I carefully unwrap the gift from Rocco and Dexie as they watch. Calder is here too. Dexie invited him not just to unveil the sculpture in the foyer but so that my family could get to know the man I love.
It’s still early, but I know this is love.
Calder knows too.
We haven’t exchanged the words, but we’re close.
“Vision is the perfect name for the sculpture,” Rocco says as I continue prying tape from the gift box my sister handed me.
“It’s fitting.” Calder smiles at me. “Your wife had a vision, and I brought it to life. I was honored that she named it and I’m humbled that you see the beauty in it.”
“I wish I would have seen the beauty in Rae’s paintings.” Rocco crosses his legs as Dexie settles in next to her husband on the couch.
I stop what I’m doing to look at my brother-in-law. He’s decked out in the T-shirt I got for him. He laughed when he saw BIL written across the front in pink letters. I laughed harder when I opened up a package that was labeled from Santa Claus.
Inside was a white button-down shirt. On the back, stamped in black letters, are the words Artistic Genius. On the front, in the same black ink, a small SIL is on the collar.
Rocco told me that I should take Santa’s hint and wear it when I’m working in Calder’s studio.
“You always supported my work, Rocco.” I lean forward, resting my hand on Calder’s knee. “If it wasn’t for you buying that painting from me, I might not have pursued my passion.”
He nods. “I’m always here if you need me.”
“The same goes for me,” Dexie chimes in. Her hand drops to the star-shaped pendant on the necklace she’s wearing. It was my gift to her this Christmas. “Open it, Rae. I can’t wait to see your face.”
I glance over at Calder. Dressed in a dark suit, he looks every inch the gentleman. He was insistent that he wanted to wear a suit and tie to our Christmas Eve celebration. I didn’t argue. Instead, I slipped into my red pantsuit because I know how much he loves it.
Finally, pulling the last piece of tape free, I open the rectangular box and peer inside.
“You got me an envelope?” I ask with a chuckle.
“I promise you there’s something very special inside.”
Curiosity sets my hands to work. I carefully rip open the envelope before sliding a single piece of white paper out.
Dexie jumps to the edge of the seat. “I’m freaking out. Open it.”
Rocco laughs. “She’s getting there. Give her a minute.”
I take that minute to look at the faces of my family. I wish my mom could be here, but she’s found someone this Christmas too. A doctor she works with invited her to have dinner at his home in Aspen. She took the chance because that’s what we all need to do. Dive in headfirst, and hope that when you emerge from the murk
y waters, light will be waiting for you.
After I glance at Dexie and Rocco, I look at Calder again.
I stare at his brilliant blue eyes. They are the same eyes that held me captive during the snowstorm and gaze into mine when we make love.
They are the eyes of a gifted artist and a visionary. One day, I hope our children will have the same color eyes as Calder.
I take a breath and carefully open the paper in my lap.
At first, I can’t register what I’m looking at, but then it hits me. My eyes fill with tears.
“Is this real?” I look at Dexie and Rocco. “This is real?”
Dex tears up. “When your nephew is born, we want you to be his godmother.”
“It’s a boy?” I ask. “You know that it’s a boy?”
“We couldn’t wait any longer.” Rocco laughs. “We both thought we knew the gender, and we were right.”
“What will his name be?” I ask as Calder grabs my hand.
“Bryant Walsh Jones.” Dexie looks at Rocco. “Bryant Park holds a special place in Rocco’s heart and Walsh, well that’s us.”
I smile. “It’s perfect.”
“What’s perfect is that you’ll be here to watch him grow up.” Rocco kisses Dexie’s cheek. “The more family we have around us to love our boy, the better.”
***
We walk into Calder’s studio at ten minutes to midnight. Our evening was spent with my family. After we opened gifts with Dexie and Rocco, we crossed the street for a big meal with Rocco’s family.
It was overwhelming in the most wonderful of ways. Calder felt comfortable. I could see it in the way he stepped into every conversation with ease. He smiled at me constantly, and when the evening was winding down, he helped Marti with the cleanup, insisting that he was going to create a sculpture for her birthday.
I know he will.
As he takes my coat from me, he feathers kisses over the back of my neck. “I love this pantsuit.”
Frostbite Page 9