Not the words to say to a woman who was pinning all her hopes on the idea. Especially when he’d been hoping that woman would find him so irresistible, she’d abandon her crappy notion about them only having sex when they were in flaming Cornwall.
As he’d given her the bad news, he thought he’d broken her. For a split second her face had drained of colour, her usually dazzling baby blues had dulled and she’d looked like she was going to howl. But then she’d straightened her shoulders and asked him. ‘What can you do?’
His version, a request to delete button, wasn’t as sexy, apparently. ‘Wordy’ and ‘wishy-washy’ were the actual adjectives she’d used, said with such clear disappointment he’d felt like a total failure.
Which, in turn, had pissed him the hell off.
‘I’m not hacking into any systems, even for you, Sunshine,’ he’d countered flippantly.
A response that had, unsurprisingly, got her back up. ‘I asked what you can do,’ she’d reminded him coolly. ‘Not what you won’t do.’ Oh, and then she’d added scathingly. ‘And please stop using Lucas’s ridiculous nickname.’
The scathing words had felt like a punch in the gut, though of course they’d been fully deserved. The nickname – his nickname for her – had been intended as an affectionate tribute to her glorious smile. The one he was never going to see again at this rate. He should never have used it in such a demeaning way.
After that he’d scurried away to his ‘office’, a.k.a. the meeting room he’d still not vacated, and spent the rest of the day trying to come up with a way to get around the ‘wishy-washy’ comment. Best he’d come up with was agreeing to call it a delete button, even though what actually happened was it triggered a request to delete.
Yeah, yeah, turns out he wasn’t a genius after all.
After firing her an email confirming his cunning plan, he’d hung around, sad git that he was, hoping to catch a glimpse of her; to apologise, to pick a fight, just to gawp, he couldn’t be sure. By nine o’clock, when she still hadn’t returned, he’d sloped home, tired, dejected and frustrated, only to find mice droppings all over his kitchen worktop.
Nice. The bastards had clearly been used to having the place to themselves while he’d been having sex on the beach.
And now here he was, the afternoon of day two, and Sam wasn’t just annoyed with him. She was seething.
It had started when he’d come back from lunch after a walk around the park to get away from staring at a computer screen and four walls. Deciding he’d play nice and see how Alice was doing with her part of the process, he’d turned the corner to her desk, only to find Damien Lynch strutting past.
Something in him had exploded. How dare the bastard walk in here like he owned the place after what he’d done to Sam? And yes, there had also been a healthy dose of how dare the bastard think he’s got a chance of getting her back? jealousy, too. So, he’d done what he was famous for and opened his gob without thinking first.
‘What the hell are you doing here, Lynch?’ he’d demanded which, now he’d reflected on it for a few hours, had been a tad confrontational.
The guy had swivelled on his shiny Italian leather shoes – it was a guess, but wasn’t that what all slick bastards wore? – and pinned him with a glare. ‘In charge now are we, Black?’
The retort had neatly put Ryan in his place, which had only served to annoy him more. ‘Just making sure you don’t nick any more ideas.’ His eyes had flicked to Alice’s computer screen and then back to Lynch. ‘You’ve done enough damage here.’
A gesture not missed by the visitor, who’d narrowed his eyes and replied in a voice dripping with cold fury. ‘What, exactly, are you accusing me of?’
To make the moment complete, Sam had popped out of her office, taken one look at them and asked Ryan the killer question. ‘What’s going on?’
He should have shrugged and said nothing. Or maybe smiled at Damien, said something along the lines of it’s all good, just ribbing him, and slunk off. But no, gut churning with jealousy and plain old dislike, Ryan had decided it would be a good idea to tell the truth. ‘I was wondering what Lynch was doing, walking past Alice’s unattended desk.’
In hindsight, he should have left out the unattended part.
Sam’s eyes had rounded in horror, but before she’d had a chance to tear him off a strip, Lynch had gone in for the kill. ‘You’d better have some evidence to back up that remark, Black, or I’ll sue you for slander.’
Ryan had smirked (again, perhaps not a great idea) and replied, ‘Your track record of being a douchebag speaks for itself.’
At which point Sam had politely asked Damien to come to her office before turning her cool blue gaze on Ryan. ‘I’ll talk to you later,’ she’d told him in a tone so cutting, it had sliced right through him.
Feeling dismissed, and fizzing with self-righteous anger, he’d decided to find the evidence by accessing the server.
It turned out that nobody had logged onto Alice’s computer since she’d logged out for her lunch break.
All that had happened half an hour ago. His humiliation now complete, Ryan was back at his desk, ruing the moment the universe had decided it was a good idea for Sam to come and sit next to him in that bar all those months ago. If she’d not been drowning her sorrows in champagne, her judgement temporarily clouded, he’d not have seen her naked, not had her incredible legs wrapped around his waist. And not have felt like punching Lynch’s face when he’d seen him.
Following that logic through, he then wouldn’t have felt compelled to confront the guy, and wouldn’t now be sitting here feeling like a clumsy oaf who’d just hugely embarrassed himself in front of the girl he desperately wanted to impress.
Staring gloomily out of his office/meeting room, his mood plunged further at the sight of Sam walking Lynch out. How could she be so polite to the git, after what he’d put her through?
Because she still has a thing for him.
Why else had she been so knocked for six when she’d seen him at the conference? Then there were the tears when he’d come to her office. Not forgetting that when she’d had the idea about the app on the cliffs in Cornwall, among the first words out of her mouth had been Lynch’s name.
He was so lost in his thoughts he didn’t hear Lucas knock on his door. Or maybe he hadn’t knocked, Ryan thought testily as the guy waltzed right in. All pink trousers and lime-green shirt.
‘You’re making my eyes hurt,’ he grumbled.
Lucas struck an exaggerated pose. ‘Don’t be such a whinger. You know it’s a good look on me.’
His expression dared Ryan to contradict him, pulling a reluctant laugh from him.
Lucas gleefully clapped his hands. ‘God, I’m good. I’ve only been here a few seconds and already I’ve turned your glower into a smile.’
Ryan raised his eyes to the ceiling. ‘Fine. Good job. Now get lost, I’ve work to do.’
‘We all have work to do. As you’d know if you sat in the open plan area with us, at the desk you were assigned, instead of hiding away in here.’
Ryan drummed his fingers on the table. ‘You done with the lecture?’
‘I didn’t come to lecture. That was a bonus. I came to get rid of the scowl from your face, which I believe I’ve achieved.’ He angled his head, giving Ryan a long scrutiny. ‘What caused it?’
Easy would be to say, ‘Nothing.’ It would also get Lucas out of his hair quicker. But it would also be lying. ‘Did you see Lynch and Sam?’
Lucas frowned. ‘Yes. She was showing him out. Shame she didn’t use the tip of her pointy shoe against his arse, but hey, that’s Sam for you.’
‘Exactly. Why is she so frigging polite to him?’
‘It’s her way. She figures cool politeness is more powerful than anger.’ Lucas gave him a sharp look. ‘Anger shows you care.’
‘You’re telling me that seeing him strut around here doesn’t turn your stomach?’ Ryan asked incredulously. ‘After what he did to her?’
<
br /> ‘I can’t stand the man,’ Lucas agreed affably, walking towards the door. ‘But seeing them together doesn’t trouble me.’ He gave Ryan another loaded look. ‘The question is, why does it trouble you so much?’
Sam fixed an icy smile on her face as she saw her ex out of the building.
‘Goodbye, Damien. I appreciate the information, but next time feel free to email me.’
Damien gave her a wounded look. ‘Seeing me in person is that bad?’
Once the hurt in his eyes might have softened her. Now it just made her mad. ‘Seeing you in person takes up too much time. Time that would be better spent protecting the company you’re trying to destroy.’
He let out a huff of bitter laughter. ‘What was I supposed to do? You made it quite clear you no longer wanted me at Privacy Solutions. I had no choice but to set up a company in a field I knew. Anything else would have taken too long and required money I didn’t have.’
‘You had a choice, Damien,’ she countered coldly. ‘You could have chosen to keep your pants zipped in the first place. You could have chosen to move far away. You could have chosen to work for someone else. But no, you were angry that I found out about your tacky little affair, angry that I didn’t forgive you, so you chose to try and destroy me.’
His face paled. ‘You’re right, I was angry you threw me out for one lapse in judgement, after all we’d been through together, but to say I set out to destroy you?’ He gave a slow shake of his head. ‘Come on, you know me better than that. I still … care for you.’
She steeled herself against the softness of his voice, the tender expression on his face. To allow him to hurt her once was poor judgement on her part. To allow him to do it again would be total madness.
Silently she turned and walked away, striding purposefully towards the meeting room Ryan was still hiding in. Ryan, who’d embarrassed the heck out of her with his unfounded accusations towards Damien. God, the man could be annoying sometimes. Which was good, actually, because it meant she didn’t have to worry about jumping back into bed with him.
Yet as she turned the corner, she caught sight of his insanely sexy face through the glass wall of the meeting room and her traitorous heart skipped a beat.
Annoyed, she reminded herself. She was annoyed.
One sharp tug at the door handle and she walked straight in. ‘I’m not knocking on a door you shouldn’t have.’
His face was carefully blank as he stared back at her. ‘Fair enough.’
‘Why are you still in here, anyway? I said you could work here temporarily, while you got up to speed. You’ve been here over three months. Get back out with the others.’
His eyebrows flew upwards. ‘Scrapping for a fight, huh?’
‘No. Just finding it hard to keep my temper while you’re doing your best to annoy me.’
He let out a low, humourless laugh. ‘You think that’s what I’m doing?’
‘I think you can’t help yourself.’
‘Just one of my superpowers, I guess.’ With a grunt of frustration he pushed away from the desk. ‘Look, I can’t be the guy you want me to be, okay? I can’t work out there, with everyone chatting in my ear all day. I can’t make your ruddy app do everything you want it to do. I can’t ignore how I feel about you. And I can’t sit back and let your fucking ex stride back in here like he owns the damn place.’ He glared back at her. ‘Not after what he did to you.’
Somewhere in her chest, her heart squeezed, but now wasn’t the time to dwell on his words. She desperately needed to be his boss. Not the woman afraid she was falling for him. ‘Do you have any idea how much your little display in front of Damien embarrassed me? Especially as he’d only come to give me a heads up on rumours he’d heard about a similar app in development.’ She glanced away, taking a moment to draw breath. ‘What happened with Damien is my business, not yours. I don’t need you defending my honour. I don’t need you protecting me.’ Her eyes sought his again. ‘I need you doing your job.’ He flinched and instantly regret surged through her. ‘Sorry. That came out wrong. I didn’t mean to—’
‘Put me in my place?’ A small, flat smile. ‘Sure you did.’ He refused to meet her eyes. ‘I’ll move my stuff before I go home.’
And now the squeeze on her heart was painful. Yet as strong as the desire was to forget the reality of their situation, she knew it was better this way. There was so much work ahead of them. She couldn’t afford to let … whatever it was between them divert her focus. Or his.
‘Thank you.’ Carefully she closed the door behind her. Being the boss, providing the strategy, the inspiration, cajoling, nurturing, driving the team on to do more, be better than they’d ever believed. All that, she enjoyed.
Hiding her feelings, pretending she didn’t care for the man she knew she’d just hurt? That truly sucked.
‘Everything okay?’ Lucas fell into step alongside her. He took one look at her face and grasped her arm. ‘Nope, don’t say anything, sweet cheeks. Come with me. I know exactly what you need.’
Ten minutes later she found herself in a small café, complete with plastic red and white check tablecloths and an air of down to earth and ordinary. After taking a sip from her mug of tea, she bit into the toasted bun Lucas had ordered for her, melting butter running over her fingers. ‘You figured a teacake was what I needed?’
He grinned as he watched her lick her fingers. ‘You’re not a flowers and cupcake kind of girl. You like practical. A good, simple but delicious teacake is right up your street.’
He wasn’t wrong, she thought as she munched on another mouthful. ‘How come you know me so well, yet Damien still thinks I like roses?’
Lucas looked affronted. ‘That’s obvious. I take notice. Damien was always far more interested in himself.’ His expression turned slightly cunning. ‘Now Ryan, on the other hand. He takes notice, too.’
Sam wanted to scoff, but instead she found herself asking, ‘Why do you say that?’
She didn’t miss the glint that appeared in his eyes. ‘I hear after the brainstorm he took you for a walk on the cliffs. Told you to start believing in yourself.’
‘You and Becky are a right pair of gossips.’
He pouted. ‘Only about important stuff.’
‘And you think Ryan helping me is important?’
‘You tell me.’
Oh no, she wasn’t going there. Finishing off the teacake, Sam sat back in her chair. ‘What’s important is getting Privacy 2 launched.’
‘If you say so.’ He crossed his legs, flicking at a non-existent crumb. ‘Still, there’s no reason why you can’t work hard and play hard.’ He winked. ‘At least I hope not.’
Sam’s eyes widened. ‘Oh my God, Lucas, you’ve found someone?’
He went all coy on her then, dropping his eyes, his cheeks flushing slightly. ‘Maybe.’
Reaching across the table she gripped at his arm. ‘Tell me everything.’
‘There’s nothing to tell.’ He smiled across the table at her. ‘Yet.’
‘Where did you meet him? What’s he like?’ She gave his arm a playful slap. ‘Come on, give me something.’
‘We met at the gym. He’s fiendishly attractive and nearly as funny as me.’ He swigged back the last of his mochaccino and eyed her thoughtfully. ‘Tell you what, come out with us tomorrow. You and Ryan. Then you can tell me what you think.’
Sam spluttered. ‘Me and Ryan?’
‘Don’t get all twitchy. He’s a friend, you’re a friend.’ When she still glared at him, he threw his hands up in the air. ‘Okay, we’ll get some others in the office to come along. Maybe Becky and her drummer guy.’
‘I don’t know.’ It still sounded way too much like a couples thing. Whatever she and Ryan were, they couldn’t be that couple that everyone at work gossiped about. She wouldn’t go through all that again.
‘Come on.’ Lucas gave her his pleading look. ‘I want you to meet Jasper. Tell me if lust is impairing my judgement.’
She was hard
ly the one to give him that advice, she thought despairingly. But as she’d never been able to say no to Lucas, she gave him the answer he wanted. ‘Fine.’
Chapter 25
Somehow he’d found himself in a swanky club on a Friday night, talking to his gay co-worker about the positive and negative attributes of a bloke called Jasper. From what Ryan had seen so far, Jasper seemed decent – unpretentious (a bit of a surprise, given his name) and affable. He just wasn’t the person Ryan wanted to spend his evening thinking about.
Once again, his attention shifted to the woman currently talking to Jasper. The one with red hair, currently tied back in a simple ponytail, huge blue eyes and a smile that made even the glummest man in the room – and yeah, that was probably him – sit up and take notice.
‘Don’t you agree?’
Shit, that was the third time Lucas had asked him a question. The last two times he’d had to ask him to repeat. Lucas would have a hissy fit if he asked a third time. ‘Yeah.’
‘Thought you would. Hard not to agree with a great ass, dynamite smile and sexy lips you want to feel all over your body.’
Ryan continued to stare at Sam. ‘Definitely.’ Belatedly he realised where Lucas’s focus was. ‘I mean, if you’re into that type of thing.’
Lucas slid him a look. ‘If you’re into six-foot-two hot men who answer to the name Jasper?’
Ryan took a swallow of his beer. ‘Exactly.’
‘As opposed to five-foot-ten beautiful redheads?’
Ryan shook his head, laughing under his breath. ‘Okay, I’m busted.’ He forced his attention back on Jasper. ‘Seems like a good guy. Bit earnest, but better than being flip. Weird sense of humour, but same as yours, so I can see the attraction for you.’ He shifted his gaze back to Lucas. ‘You slept with him yet?’
Lucas rolled his eyes. ‘I can always rely on you to voice the question everyone else has been too tactful to ask.’ He glanced down at his bottle of beer, then back up to Ryan. ‘Would it surprise you if I said no?’
Ryan shrugged. ‘What, I’m supposed to think because you’re gay you were shagging each other before you’d even swopped names?’ His eyes slid unconsciously back to Sam. ‘Don’t have to be gay to do that. Just dumb.’
The New Guy Page 19
