“Oh, fuck,” Prez breathes out.
“What the hell are you talking about?” I lay my fist on the table. “Who the fuck was she seeing?”
“His name is Gabe.” I’m faced with two men who are used to dealing with information, seeing by the look on their faces they’re adding two and two together in a type of math I can’t understand. The name doesn’t register. Until Mouse expands, “I’m guessing it’s short for Gabriel.”
“Fucker’s playing with us.” Wizard slams his hand down on the desktop.
My gut churns. “Mouse?” I ask cautiously, hoping the answer to the sum I’ve come up with isn’t right.
Seems that it is when Mouse jerks his chin upward. “Unless it’s one hell of a coincidence, and I think it’s not, it’s Archangel Gabriel. He wants us to fuckin’ know it’s him who’s got her.”
Turning, I slam my fist into the wall.
“I should have put two and two together.” Throttle speaks through a tensed jaw. “Didn’t get much of a description, but the waitress said this Gabe had white blond hair and was a tall, muscular motherfucker.”
Wizard waves him off. “You weren’t thinking of matching a man from his description at the time, Throttle. Don’t beat yourself up. We wouldn’t have done differently if we’d known earlier. We can confirm it properly when we get the CCTV footage from the coffee shop, but I’d say there’s not too much doubt with what you’ve just said and the handle he’s using. Drummer. I think it’s best we assume fuckin’ Archangel’s got Olivia now, and I’ve fuck all idea what he’s going to do with her.”
“Give me the phone.” I hold out my hand. “I’m going to fuckin’ talk to him.”
Prez shakes his head. “Not without us thinking this through.” He closes his eyes as if he’s thinking. “Eli and Ollie were out on their own. He doesn’t know the club is involved, unless Olivia told him. If there’s a chance he doesn’t yet know, I want to keep him in the dark.”
A chance. A slim one. “He’s playing with us,” Throttle observes.
Mouse waves to Wizard, holding out his hand. “Let me examine that, Prez.”
“Can he trace the phone?” I remember Wraith could from his own.
“That’s what I’m going to find out.” Mouse looks tense.
It could make a difference if Archangel knows of our involvement. Wizard is right. If there’s a chance we can stay in the background, we might have a better chance. If he believes there’s only a man who’s not in his right mind trying to find her, then he might fuck up.
I rake my fingers through my hair, questions chasing each other around in my head. Why take Olivia? And, should I tell Eli exactly who we think has got her? What will it do to him for him to know it’s our worst enemy? Let him believe she ran off with another lover? Would that be kinder? At least he wouldn’t have to worry about her not being alive.
No. He might think it right now, but no man deserves to believe he’s been left for another. I beckon for the unlocked phone which Mouse reluctantly hands over. I read the messages for myself. Mouse was right. Nothing more there than to think they met for anything other than coffee. Mouse impatiently reaches for the phone again, and I surrender it back.
Thinking about it, Olivia went from being surrounded by people, both men and women, to living an isolated life with a man who gave her no attention and wanted none from her. She was lonely and would have been ripe to be picked by a friendly voice. Everyone here had known she was Eli’s from back when they were kids. No one’s ever seriously flirted with her. She’s not learned to be wary around strange men, and is likely to have treated him just like she would a woman who approached her.
“What you thinking, VP?”
“This Gabe targeted Olivia. Fuck knows how. It was planned.”
“How, we can only guess at, but we do know why. To hit us where it fuckin’ hurts.” Prez whistles out air through his teeth. “I asked Butcher to round up everyone for church. We need to locate her and fast. Jeez, Drummer, I hate to think what he might be doing to her.” Fuck. Archangel could use her to hurt us in so many ways. Disappear her so we never know what happened to her? Leave her dead body where it could be found? None of the reasons why he’d want her are good ones.
Prez continues, “Mouse, you stay here and search for any leads that could help us.”
A sharp rise and dip of his head and the half Native American shows his agreement.
“What do you want to do about Eli, Prez?” I ask him, being undecided myself. Would knowing what’s happened to Olivia destroy him completely? Or is that just as likely to happen if he eventually finds he’s been left out of the loop? I have no idea what a man in his state can deal with.
Wizard thinks for a moment, clearly considering my question carefully. Then he voices my own thoughts. “Things have happened fast. Do we make or break Eli by getting him involved in this?”
If Eli’s head was screwed on right, I know there’d be only one way to look at it. I realise I don’t have any option but to treat him like the man he was. “Involve him,” I decide when the decisions passed back to me. “How the fuck would you feel if it were Amy? I know how I’d be going crazy if it had been Sam who disappeared. Can’t keep him out of it, Wizard.”
Prez’s hand grasps my shoulder. “You think he can handle it?”
Shaking my head, I reply, “I’ve got fuck all idea, Prez, but that we should give him the chance is my gut feel.”
He nods. “Okay, Drummer. He’s your son. I’ll defer to you on this one. Eli joins us in church.” He then opens the door and disappears out of it, Throttle close on his heels.
I pause a moment. Mouse reaches for his joint, picks up a lighter and applies the flame to it. “We’ll get her back.” As he speaks, his intense dark eyes compel me to believe he’ll do what he can, but if he’s right, we’re dealing with a man who hasn’t got an ounce of compassion within him. We might not have much time.
“Find her fast, Mouse.”
I leave and head to the meeting room as brothers are filing in for church. Making my way to the top end of the table, I receive slaps on the back, or serious nods, that simple gesture conveying sympathy, support and promises of retribution to whoever’s taken one of our own. I’m not surprised in a situation like this, word has already gotten around. Hound meets my eyes from the opposite side of the table and gives me a nod, an acknowledgement he has already filled people in on what’s gone down. It saves time, I’m down with it.
Three chairs remain empty as everyone takes their place. That of Wizard, Wraith, and my normal seat at the end of the table.
A minute passes, then two. Then one more. Glances are sent my way, but I shake my head. This is Wizard’s show now, he should be here to lead it.
Eventually the door opens. Prez steps in.
Looking grim, he goes quickly to his place at the head of the table. Instead of banging the gavel, he raps the wood, an unnecessary gesture as attention is already on him.
“Olivia’s missing.”
“Any info on who’s got her?” As Peg snaps his question, I realise no one else knows yet.
Wizard pauses, then says, “We think Archangel’s got her.”
The reactions are about what you’d expect, and it takes a moment for everyone to settle. This time Prez does need to use the gavel.
“We’ve brought Eli back to the compound.” There’s not much comment. That had been agreed to previously. However, Prez’s next statement isn’t accepted so easily. “I’m bringing him in on this discussion.”
Hound again raises his chin my way.
“What the fuck, Prez?” Marvel groans, putting his head in his hands. “You think that’s a good idea seeing as how we all feel about him? Enough to agree to having him close, but having him seated around this fuckin’ table?”
Before I can open my mouth, Hound’s voice thunders, “Do I need to remind you, Eli had gotten to the point when he couldn’t mentally cope. It wasn’t his fault, nor a conscious decision. Now his w
ife’s gone. I agree, he deserves to be part of getting her back.”
Marvel’s face looks thunderous. “If he hadn’t taken her off the compound, she wouldn’t be in Archangel’s hands. I don’t see how I can forgive him, not for this, Prez. He should have stayed, explained—”
“He didn’t fuckin’ know what was wrong with him. Hell, even if there was something wrong.” It’s Joker who aims his comments to Marvel now. “You don’t wake up feeling different one day. It creeps up gradually, until you can’t distinguish who you are anymore, or remember a time you thought differently.” He pauses and makes sure he’s got everyone’s attention. “Eli got it stuck in his head that he was going to let everyone down. Rather than risk someone dying on his watch, he walked away. Fuckin’ feelings he couldn’t put into words overrode any rational side of his brain thinking clearly.”
“We could have killed him.” Lady turns to his partner. I remember he was one voting for leniency and wonder now whether he recognised something at the time from having watched Joker spiralling.
Joker nods grimly. “Sometimes death seems the only way out.” He pauses to let that sink in. “Eli got to a place where there didn’t seem a way out. He wasn’t thinking rationally. Perhaps we weren’t either. We didn’t ask questions.”
Hound is nodding as Joker speaks, when he finishes, he takes over. “I’ve seen Eli, spoken to him. From a sergeant-at-arms point of view, Eli saw himself as a danger to this club, so chose to leave it. He wasn’t thinking of himself, he wasn’t being a fuckin’ selfish bastard. He was protecting us the only way he thought he could.”
“But the upshot is Olivia was left exposed and has been taken.” Shooter looks confused. “If Eli’s so lost in his head, shouldn’t we be finding her for him? What fuckin’ help can he be? He could be a hindrance.”
“We can’t leave him out of it!” I roar. “If I’d seen his distress, spoken to him earlier, all this might have been prevented. Let’s not repeat the same fuckin’ mistakes.”
“I don’t understand why he didn’t talk to you, Drum. Or you, Throttle.” Shooter sits back, folding his arms.
Prez rolls his eyes. “That bitch you went with, before you hooked up with Charlotte? You almost lost yourself in the bottle when she walked away.”
Shooter goes bright red. Yeah, he ran on alcohol fumes for a while. Known for being a sharpshooter, he nearly fucked up when he missed a critical shot. Luckily Heart was there and took it for him instead. We all knew what was wrong, asshole hadn’t admitted it until Blade, surprisingly, had put it together and confronted him. We’d stepped up and given him Satan’s Devils’ therapy—told him to get his head out of his ass, pull himself together, and go fuck a whore. Worked, as I seem to remember. The point is, he hadn’t asked for help.
“We’re men,” Lady puts in. He ignores the snorts. “We bottle things up. Eli was feeling shit, but didn’t know the reason. As Joker deduced, his own brain turned against him.”
Marvel, to give him his due, looks thoughtful. “I ain’t got an old lady. Never have, never will. Partly because I don’t want to have anything that I could lose. Except my bike. That would fuckin’ kill me if I lost that.” He gives a weak grin, then looks serious again. “I know you think I’m hard and unfeeling, but I fuckin’ love this club. Hate anything that threatens it. If Eli thought he could lead us wrong, well, perhaps it was right for him to step out. Now he’s lost his old lady.” He glances up to see if we’re still with him. When he sees we are, he carries on, “Losing her and the baby will fuckin’ destroy him. No way he’d recover from that. Not knowing what’s going on could drag him down too. Now you’ve explained, I can’t see how we can keep him out of it.”
“You suggesting we bring him in on our discussions?” Wizard asks. “Or just keep him updated?”
As Marvel thinks of his own answer, Throttle supplies his own. “Eli doesn’t trust himself, but I still do. Whether he knows it or not, he could have something to contribute. Olivia’s his life, always has been. He needs to have a chance to shape how we get her back.”
I notice he’s being positive and not saying if. It’s the only way we’ll survive this. It’s not just Eli who would be destroyed if we lost her forever, it would be each and every member of this club. That’s the reason Archangel took her. He knew how to get us where it would most hurt. He’d have gotten the same result if he had taken any one of our old ladies, we just made it too fucking easy for him to take her.
At that moment, the door opens and in steps Wraith. I’m not surprised by the desolate look on his face as he drops into a chair and his head falls into his hands. Peg’s arm rests on his shoulder, but no one offers words of sympathy. There’s nothing you can say to a man whose daughter is missing.
Prez raises an eyebrow toward him. When Wraith looks up, he catches his eye, and tells us, “Sophie’s a fuckin’ mess.” His own dishevelled appearance suggests he is as well. “Sam’s trying to comfort her.”
“Eli outside? He know you couldn’t find her?”
“Yes, and yes.” His eyes meet mine. “That shut down mood he’s been in? Well, he’s swung the other way now. The prospects are having a hard time holding him.” Wraith shakes his head. “I’ve seen him the past few days, Drummer. Seen him at his worst. Now he’s got a need for action, and it’s tearing him up. He’s just taken a swing for Nathan, desperate to go and look for her himself, even without a clue where to start.”
“Get him in here, Wraith,” Prez demands. “Can’t have him running off as a loose cannon.
“I’ll go,” Joker offers, and then stands and disappears out of the door. Only seconds later it reopens, and Eli pushes past him to get in.
I notice Eli sits next to Wraith, but doesn’t look at him. I’m still angry with the man myself. I’d never have let Olivia go off alone whatever her arguments had been. But I don’t say a word. One look at the man shows he’s suffering enough without anyone pointing his fuck-up out.
Eli, himself, looks agitated. His hands fidget, his body almost seems to be twitching as though it’s too great an effort to keep himself still. I suspect he’s avoided taking another of his antidepressants this morning.
Prez bangs the gavel. “Eli. You’re here as a guest not a member.” He breaks off and looks pointedly at Marvel, before he resumes, “Olivia’s missing and we’re going to help get her back. What you don’t yet know is that we’ve got good reason to believe she’s been taken by Archangel.”
Eli looks like he’s stopped breathing. His hands fist, his knuckles go white. Instead of the constant movement, he looks like he’s frozen.
This is it, I think silently, watching him carefully. This is the point where he loses it completely, or resurrects the man I know is still inside.
“Breathe,” Marvel says from beside him. “Fuckin’ breathe, Brother. You’re not on your own now. Need your head in the game to get her back.”
I think we’re all surprised it’s Marvel who speaks to him. Then again, you never know which way that man will jump. That it is the one most likely to have confronted him seems to pull Eli up.
He does indeed take a couple of deep breaths, visibly struggling to pull himself together, then addresses Prez. “Why…” His voice cracks and he tries again, “Why do you think that?” His voice becomes a little firmer. “What evidence have you got?”
Prez nods my way. I take over.
“A man calling himself Gabe appears to have befriended Olivia.” As a pair of distressed eyes in particular come my way, I elaborate, “It’s sounds like an innocent friendship. It’s not the first time they had coffee together. Though from the message thread on her phone, they’ve only been in contact for a few weeks and only ever met at the coffee shop.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Eli…
Liv’s gone.
When I’d first heard, my immediate thought was that she had left me. I couldn’t blame her, I’d pushed her away. But Liv would have faced me, told me, not left without explanation, if only
to tell me what an ass I’d been. Then, I expected the baby was coming early, and hell, that was such a scary thought, I just filed it away. I’m not ready. I’d left it to Wraith and Sophie to go to the hospital, unable to cope I’m ashamed to say.
When she hadn’t been found, well, that was the point it had gotten through the mists in my brain. Liv was missing.
For the first time in months, thinking of someone other than myself breaks into the depths of despair and self-loathing that I’ve been drowning in. Just a crack in the walls I’ve been hiding behind. I feel I’m stumbling my way through a thick fog, knowing I’ve two options facing me. I could take the easy way out, stay here immersed in my pain and misery, or I could start looking for a way out. A way to contribute to finding my wife.
Believing I was still on my own, that no one would help a lost son of the Satan’s Devils, my first impulse had been to ride around the streets of Tucson, just trying to find a trace of where she might have gone.
The prospects had to physically restrain me. I became more and more agitated that I was helpless, held back from doing anything at all.
Then Joker had come out to collect me and had brought me into the space I’d never thought to enter again—the hallowed meeting room where the Satan’s Devils hold church. It seems strange to sit here without the comforting weight of my leather cut on my shoulders. For a start, I don’t understand why I’m here. I do notice Drummer’s sitting in the VP’s seat, the place that so recently was mine, and once again, I’m relegated to a position lower down the table beside Wraith.
When I listened to the chilling rendition that they think Archangel has Liv, I froze. My brain screaming, I can’t do this. I could walk back into that fog and disappear behind those walls I’d built for myself. Nothing can hurt me there as I don’t care.
“Breathe,” Marvel says from the other side of me. “Fuckin’ breathe, Brother. You’re not on your own now. Need your head in the game to get her back.”
Hawk's Cry : Satan's Devils MC Second Generation #2 Page 18
