by S. J. Wright
Avoiding her question, he continued. “There are threats right now, within the council—situations that could put the girls in jeopardy. Teddy has promised they will be protected, but I don’t think it’s going to be something she can control.”
“Then why take them back at all? It makes no sense!”
“There are so many issues to be handled. The situation in Arizona is becoming a nightmare. Teddy said that there is now a government investigation into what happened at the farm.”
Sarah dropped her arms from his waist and stepped back. “And she can’t handle these things? She needs you? What can you do now, Michael? Your vampire days are over.”
That was when she noticed his hands trembling. With a woman’s well-tuned intuition, Sarah knew. If the girls were in danger, Michael would do anything to protect them.
“You’re thinking of being turned.” It came out as a whisper.
He nodded. His face was steeped in shadows. There was a kind of suffering in his expression that Sarah had never witnessed before.
“I can’t leave them with her and know they’re in danger,” he said. “I can’t protect them as a human. Not effectively.”
She sat back on the swing, her face ashen.
“Sarah, I have to become vampire again. You know what that means.”
Her gaze was still unfixed, drifting across the nothingness that she saw in her future—without Michael. It stretched out before her in ceaseless ebony waves. She would drown in a world without him. She would be lost.
Sarah would want that—to lose herself as she lost him.
What Michael saw in her expression was defeat. He was determined that they would spend their last night together being loving and intimate, feeding each other the food that soon he would have no need to consume.
He reached out a hand for her. Perhaps she was stunned senseless by his news. Drawing her inside the front door, he began to employ every single skill known to man (and vampire), which would render a female lover helpless against his onslaught. Sarah hadn’t quite wrapped her mind around their conversation on the porch. But soon, it didn’t matter.
The instant his lips touched hers, her body felt as if it were drifting on some cloud in the middle of nowhere. Without fail, that gentle wave of sweetness that she always tasted on his lips would transform into something far more carnal and desperate. No man ever wants to be seen as desperate, but ultimately between the long, slow wet kisses and Sarah’s body pressed against his, the word desperate became relevant. His grey eyes closed, he tilted his head back and moaned, a chord that rang of loss and lust. That was enough to derail Sarah’s thoughts. All she could feel was desire, melting her on the inside and lighting up her skin with bursts of carnal electricity.
He began to unbutton her cotton shirt. It was something crisp and clean. It was Sarah. Her innocence, her spirit, her giving heart. As gently as possible, he manipulated the little circles away from their slots and drew Sarah’s shirt open at the waist. He didn’t resort to gentle with the bra. He ripped the back of it when it didn’t unfasten during his first attempt. Michael’s fingers were trembling.
They had managed to get as far as the stair landing leading up to the bedrooms. He was holding her wrists above her head with one hand. With the other, he was grazing the curve of one breast with the tip of his thumb. The nipple contracted and grew stiff before his touch even came close. When he felt the very tip of her hardened nipple, he growled lightly in her ear and tightened his grip on her wrists.
“You belong to me. You’re mine, Sarah.”
She nodded jerkily, trying to push closer to him. The sea of conflicting emotions going through Sarah’s body was dark chaos. He was leaving, but here he was kissing her like he’d never wanted her more in his life.
The pressure of his index finger on the inside of her glossy thigh under her denim shorts kept the fear at bay because she knew what was coming.
His finger trailed up until it reached the fabric of her pristine white bikini panties.
“I want these shorts off, sweetheart,” he whispered into her ear. The vibrations of his tones started a chain reaction that began at her right earlobe and ended in her abdomen. She trembled a little, but felt a great release building within her. He would make her scream before he was done with her.
Her skin was warm enough to radiate heat even through the cotton panties. His fingers moved lightly over the dark hair between her legs and the index finger trailed down until it was hovering over her covered clitoris.
Michael wanted her eyes on his when he touched it. He dropped her wrists and wrapped his fingers around the back of her neck, gaining her quick attention. Sarah locked her gaze on his.
What she saw there was impossible.
For the last time, my heart.
Something inside Sarah’s head snapped into place.
Jesus. He’s seriously going to leave me. This is no joke.
Rage burned inside her, pushing away all the fiery passion she’d felt. She clenched her fists at her sides and her head rose in a challenging gesture.
“This is how you say goodbye? One last time before you leave me forever, right?”
Whatever answer she saw on his face, it wasn’t the one she wanted.
Her powerful right hook came at him like a loco snake. For a moment, he thought she was joking; a brief moment. Then the impact of her punch sent him stumbling back onto the stairs against the cedar post wall.
He couldn’t think of anything to do. He remained on the stairs, watching her carefully. There was no anger in him that cried out for reprisal. He should have approached her differently. Now he was going to pay for it.
Sarah looked down at her hand and groaned. She’d broken open three knuckles on her right hand. With only a second’s hesitation, she moved down the stairs and through the hall to the kitchen. The nearly blue florescent light above the stove was still on, spreading the room with what looked like moonlight to Sarah. She turned on the cold water at the sink and held her right hand under the flow.
The blood mixed with the cold water on her quivering right hand and dripped quickly down onto the stainless steel. It found its way in a series of miniscule streams, bowing to gravity and the force of the water. She turned off the faucet. When she saw the last pink drops fall and make their way slowly toward the drain, she felt something precious was about to be lost just like those drops.
It will fall and then disappear.
She pressed a dry paper towel on her hand where the blood was beginning to clot.
She heard Michael walking across the stained concrete floor of the first story. His bare feet slapped against the concrete. She looked up at him, her expression dull, when he came through the doorway.
In front of the sink, he reached for her. He looked intently into her chalky white face.
“Don’t do this. I have to go. Think about the girls, sweetheart.”
“I know what you’re doing,” she replied. “You managed to get through a year living with me before you realized that you don’t really want this. Thanks.” Sarah dropped the paper towel into the wastebasket and headed for the den.
He followed her into the den.
“For fuck’s sake, Sarah! You know me better than anyone ever has! How could you imagine that I would not do everything I possibly can to protect those kids? You know that’s not the way I handle things. And I love you so much, sweetie.” When she didn’t respond to the gentle tug he gave the sleeve of her shirt, he went on a little more casually. Even Sarah could see one of those old walls rising up between them again. The hint of humor would increase, become elevated and then Michael was truly angry. She had nothing to fear as far as her own safety. But he often left her at this point in the argument because he needed to let the rage go.
She was wrong. The lowered eyebrows were different this time. He wasn’t mad. She saw the first teardrop roll down the left side of his face. Leaning away, he tried to get his emotions reined in before she started crying too. It had ha
ppened before. Michael stared at the television over the fireplace. He had cursed up a storm the night he decided to finally install the bracket in the wall to hang up the flat screen. These drifting thoughts helped get things back in line. He rubbed at the corners of his eyes quickly, turning away from her. She walked into the guest bedroom at the end of the hall and quietly closed the door behind her; and locked it.
That one gesture said everything. He wouldn’t be forgiven for this.
Chapter 4
Nelly pushed open the back screen door. She was soaking wet from the rain. Drops of it had flattened her new short hairstyle that she had acquired the week before. She was carrying two paper grocery bags that were dark with drops of rain and likely to tear open in an instant.
“Lord above! I left my umbrella at home. I’m sure I resemble something close to a wet cat.”
She chuckled at her own misfortune and unloaded the two bags onto Sarah’s cluttered kitchen counter.
The young woman she’d raised turned to Nelly with an expression that defied reason. Sarah’s eyes were strangely lifeless. Her face was pale and Nelly worried that she might be truly ill. She gripped Sarah’s upper arms lightly and peered into her face.
“What in the world is wrong, honey? You’re missing the girls?”
“He’s gone.”
“Michael?”
“He’s gone. He left me.”
Her expression was calm and held no hint of the turmoil she was experiencing inside as she sat down on a barstool across the kitchen counter. She stretched her lean tan arms across the bar and rested her head between them. Her words came out muffled.
“The girls are in trouble and Michael is going to be reborn as a vampire so he can help them.”
“Oh, sweetie...”
“So we broke up. He could already be changing back right now into what he used to be.”
She fixed her gaze on the window over the kitchen sink. She remembered the incident with the curtains. It was the first household chore she’d asked him to do at the cabin. She needed help mounting the rod to the wall and Michael couldn’t seem to get the curtain rod hung straight; he had laughed about it later. It was just one moment of hundreds that brought joy breaking through the tragic history between them.
But now he was gone. And I might never see him again.
Coming around the kitchen counter, Nelly pulled Sarah into her arms and rubbed her back.
“He was thinking of Sam, then. Is it possible for him to get her to safety and then come back to you?”
“No.” Sarah sounded hoarse and tired. “No. He’s going to be king like they all wanted him to be. Almost like nothing else ever happened. It’ll be as if he never really knew me.”
“He loves you.”
“Not enough!”
She stood up and began to pace across the kitchen, both hands on her head and pressing against the increasing pain of a rare headache.
“He’s doing the right thing for Sam, so I can’t hate him for this. He knew that. I can’t punish him for looking out for our girls.”
Nelly smiled sadly. Sam and Anne had had quite an affect on Sarah. She had been a wonderful mother figure to the two changelings until Theodora had come for them away a few days ago. It had a devastating consequence for both Michael and Sarah because they’d hoped that with Selena’s help, the girls could become human and stay in Indiana. They wanted just that, but it had all gone to hell when Teddy came to take them away again. What could they do in the face of Teddy’s power and political influence?
“She could have found someone else to take the throne,” Sarah said.
“Why do they need a monarch anyway? It all seems old-fashioned to me,” Nelly said.
“I don’t know, but they’re set on it. If Michael offers himself, I know they’ll take him over Sam in a heartbeat. And with Anne still missing...” She hesitated and then sighed deeply. “Michael will be king. Then he can find Anne and protect them both.”
“As a vampire,” Nelly replied.
Sarah went to the refrigerator and took down a magnetic photo frame that held a picture of Sam and Anne. They had spent that day playing in the rain and mud, like proper country girls. Sarah had snapped the picture of the two of them standing in the rain, covered by brown mud with their arms around each other. Anne was laughing with her head thrown back and Sam was grinning at the camera like an imp. It was Sarah’s favorite picture of the girls together.
“These are my children,” she told Nelly quietly, handing over the picture to the older woman. “And they need me. They want to be tucked into bed at night like normal kids. They want a regular life and the closest they’ve come to getting that was living here with me and Michael.”
“It’s not going to be like that, Sarah. They are not little girls. Anne could have had three doctorate degrees by now if she’d been allowed to attend college. And you’ve seen how Sam gets depressed if she sees a group of teenagers. She will never get to live that life.”
“You don’t understand.”
Nelly smacked one of her hands on the tabletop in frustration.
“No! You don’t understand. How many years have I been taking care of you and your sister, Sarah? Have you ever thought about what I might have given up in order to be with you?”
Sarah’s eyebrows crinkled in confusion.
“What do you mean? I thought you were happy with us.”
“For the most part, I was. Until your Dad passed away.”
There was a moment when Sarah saw the shadow of grief pass over Nelly’s face and she realized that despite being around each other a great deal since her father died, Sarah had never truly seen Nelly mourn for him.
“I wondered about you two sometimes,” Sarah said softly. “Did you love him?”
The older woman’s eyes welled with tears but she didn’t make eye contact when she answered.
“Always.”
Sarah held herself motionless. She was a statue in that dark kitchen with the rain pounding the roof above her. Her stomach gave a little flip. Could it be true? She had been expecting a swift denial or a half-hearted shrug. But not this.
“Nelly, what are you not telling me?”
The woman who had always been there for her, who was always willing to listen to her (whether it was about school or her sister or anything) was sitting there crying after being asked a question that she probably wished she hadn’t answered. Because she knew once this little fragile secret came out, it would drastically shift her relationship with Sarah.
Nelly looked at her with tired eyes. She loved Sarah beyond all others in her life. Tears slid down her cheeks. It felt like she was about to lose everything she treasured.
“Sarah, I’m your mother.”
What followed was a long silence, broken only by Sadie, Sarah’s Golden Retriever, scratching at the back patio door and the monotonous patter of the rain falling against the house, the trees and everything else. Sarah moved slowly towards the back door.
I don’t understand.
Sarah pulled open the sliding door. The faithful dog sensed the tension in the room as soon as she came in. She sat obediently next to the towel on the floor, put there specifically so that Sarah could dry the golden fur. Sadie turned her soulful brown eyes towards Nelly and whined.
Sarah continued to stand by the door. She watched the rain coming down, slapping itself against the potted flowers on her little deck. The miniature rose bush, known to rose enthusiasts as Golden Horizons, was covered with rain. Some of the yellow petals had fallen away from their stems and lay sedately on the weathered boards of the deck. She stared at them.
“Sarah? Say something, honey.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Sit down. I’ll tell you.”
Sarah listened to Nelly’s story about how she had fallen hard for Robert Wood before he’d met Selena. They had been friends throughout middle school and even after her family had moved north to Greenwood when she was seventeen, Robert would drive
up a few times a month to take her out for pizza and ice cream.
“He was so awkward as a young man,” Nelly said in the gloom. “I swear he had legs as long as a baby giraffe. It was his heart that drew me in.”
She gave Sarah a sad smile.
“We were engaged when I turned eighteen. Our families were hopeful. I’d grown up on a farm like he had, so it seemed as if our future was set.”
“When did he meet Selena?” Sarah asked, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
Nelly shook her head.
“He met her the day before I told him I was pregnant with you.”
“What? How could he do that? How could he leave you alone?”
“He didn’t abandon me. That’s what I meant when I asked you if you knew what I had given up. I never got married, Sarah. Except for my sister and brother, my family deserted me. Your Grandmother Wood insisted that I stay at the farm. She was convinced that Robert would come back to me.”
Sarah sighed.
“He did come back. But with her.”
“Yes, he did.”
Nelly shrugged and gave her daughter a half grin.
“Selena was quite surprised at what she came home to. Grandmother Wood felt that if your dad wouldn’t give up Selena, then the child I was carrying should belong to her. She did promise me that I could remain at the farm and take care of you for as long as I wanted.”
“Selena and Dad eloped then?”
“Yes. It broke my heart, Sarah. But I held onto some hope.”
Her tired eyes met those of her daughter. Tears had begun to form in the corner of each eye.
“Every time I felt you move, it brought me a little burst of joy. When you were born, I took you into my arms and thought I’d found heaven.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
Sarah wrapped an arm around her mother’s ample waist and leaned her head on Nelly’s shoulder.
“I’m so sorry he hurt you like that. It wasn’t fair.”
“I don’t blame him. When he met Selena, he wasn’t in his right mind.”
“What do you mean?”
Apprehension moved across Sarah’s features.
