Eden peeked her head in. “Can I steal Ryder away, Ollie?”
He shrugged. “I guess.”
“As you can see by his neutral reaction, I’ve been riveting company.” I rustled his hair. “We’ll hang out again soon.”
“When are you going back to California?” he asked.
I looked over at Eden and said, “I don’t know, buddy. I haven’t figured it out yet.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
*
RYDER
I looked around, noticing that Eden had cleaned up all of the dishes while I was with Ollie. The vague noise of Ollie’s iPad in the background was the only sound that registered as I found myself alone with her for the first time in a while.
Our bodies were close as we stood before each other in her kitchen. Every inch of my skin was aware of her.
My lips ached to kiss hers. Even though I wanted that more than anything, I held back, unsure how she would feel. Hadn’t I sprung enough on her today? Yes, she exhibited a certain level of comfort with me online, but this was the real deal. I couldn’t just assume everything would be the same—she hadn’t chosen this scenario. She hadn’t invited me here. Until I could confirm her feelings, I wasn’t going to assume it was okay to kiss her or touch her. And as of right now, she still seemed a little on edge around me.
“So, Ms. Shortsleeve, I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on your last name.”
“Yeah. That’s me. Thanks a lot, Ollie.” She smiled and just looked at me for a while before she shook her head. “I still can’t believe you’re here, that you found me.”
“Are you happy I’m here?”
Eden nodded. “Yes. Please don’t doubt that.”
Relief ran through me. I reached for her hand, and she looped her fingers in with mine. Even that simple touch caused my dick to stiffen. If this was how it was gonna be, this would be one of the longest weeks of my life—or however long I was staying.
“I really don’t want to…but I have to work tonight,” she said.
Disappointment filled me. “You can’t take the night off?”
“I’ve been off the last couple of nights, remember? I can’t afford to disappear. It’s making me nervous. I’ll lose my clients.”
Never had I understood her need to keep that job the way I did tonight. Now that I saw how much responsibility she had, it was clear why she needed that steady income. It was sure as hell a lot more money than she made waitressing.
“I totally get it, Eden. I’m sorry for not immediately understanding.”
She looked pained. “Believe me, it’s the last thing I want to do tonight.”
It hurt me that she felt forced into it in any way.
“How about this? Why don’t I go to the hotel and let you work. Then tomorrow night, in the early evening, I’ll come back and take you and Ollie out to dinner before you have to start camming.”
Her expression brightened. “That would be awesome.”
“Is there any place in particular he likes to go? I don’t know the area.”
“Yes. There’s this steakhouse that’s cafeteria-style. You can pick what you want from a line-up of choices. He likes to be able to smell the different options before making a decision, since he can’t see what they look like. He loves it. It’s called York’s.”
“No-brainer then. That’s where we’ll go.”
A long moment of silence passed as we looked into each other’s eyes. Being here still felt so surreal. She looked like she wanted to tell me something.
“I know Ollie mentioned Ethan,” she finally said. “He moved to New York.”
“I see. You never mentioned him.”
“I know.” She paused. “He’s one of the reasons I’m very reluctant to get attached to anyone. He got a job there and wanted me to move. I told him I wasn’t willing to uproot Ollie. My brother loves his school, and it really is the right fit for him. Ethan had to decide whether to take the job or stay in Utah with us, and he chose the job. That’s really all there is to that story.”
I nodded. No wonder she was so hesitant about taking things further with me.
“You were with him for how long?”
“A couple of years. He walked into Ellerby’s one day. That’s how I met him.”
“Have you dated anyone since?”
“No. Not a single person in the two years since we’ve broken up.”
“So, you haven’t been with anyone?”
“No, I haven’t.”
“That’s a long time.” I examined her face and could see the scars written all over it. “He really hurt you, didn’t he?”
She took a deep breath. “The breakup with Ethan was my first real heartbreak. We were together for a year and a half. He made me feel protected, although I never expected him to want to take on everything that came along with me. You know? It just sucks when you care about someone, and they don’t choose you. At the same time, I totally understand why he left.”
I felt a tightening in my chest and couldn’t figure out if it was jealousy or anger at him for hurting her and making her think he’d made the right choice by leaving.
“So, you weren’t camming back then, when you were with him?”
“No. Not yet.” She laughed. “He has no clue what I’ve gotten myself into. I haven’t spoken to him in a long time. Sometimes I laugh, thinking about him accidentally finding me.”
“That would serve the fucker right.”
She laughed and looked over at the clock. “Crap. I need to get Ollie to bed and start getting ready. I’m sorry.”
I didn’t want to leave her, but I needed to let her work.
“Don’t worry about me. I’m gonna catch up on some work emails and get some sleep. I haven’t slept for shit the past couple of days.”
“Because you were worried about me. That’s my fault.”
“It’s not—and you know what? I wouldn’t change a damn thing about what it took to get me here to see you.”
Her mouth curved into a smile. “I wouldn’t either.”
I began walking toward the door. My heart pounded because I really wanted to kiss her goodnight. I hadn’t felt this way since I was fourteen on my very first date, such anxious anticipation. But I wasn’t sure whether it was okay to kiss her for a number of reasons. One, I didn’t know if she wanted me to. Two, I suspected it would be like a drug—once I started, I wouldn’t be able to stop and would want to do much more than kiss her. Three, I had to really think about whether whatever was happening with us extended into “real life.” Suppose I kissed her…then what? We have a week of fucking around and then I leave? A kiss was a kiss…but with Eden, it would mean so much more. I needed to be careful.
She stood in the entrance as I stepped outside.
With my hands in my pockets, I said, “I’ll come by around five tomorrow. Does that work?”
“That’s perfect.”
Eden leaned against the door, staring at me like she was still in awe of my being here. I reached for her hand and kissed it firmly, letting my lips linger on her skin longer than normal. That was my compromise.
After I got back to the hotel, I told myself I wasn’t going to log in to her show. But curiosity got the best of me. I happened to catch it right at the point where she had taken her top off. It was just as hard to watch as I thought it might be. In fact, it was more difficult than ever.
Her nails were painted red. They hadn’t been that color earlier. My heart started to palpitate as I fixated on her hands massaging her breasts and imagined her digging them into my skin…or someone else’s. I hadn’t watched her show in a while for this very reason—I couldn’t handle the idea of other men ogling her anymore.
That was pretty damn ironic, considering how we’d met.
***
The next evening, the line to get into York’s was long. While I preferred to sit down, order a meal, and not have to pick up my food like I was in a high school cafeteria, I could totally understand Ollie wanting to smell everything.
It had taken forever for five o’clock to roll around. I’d spent the day catching up on work emails and took out some of my nervous energy on the hotel gym equipment. I swam a few laps in the pool, too. Then my hand got a good workout in the shower as I rubbed one off to relieve the tension.
Now that I was with Eden again, it was clear that nothing I’d done today had worked to calm the adrenaline running through me. She looked stunning without even having to try—my gorgeous little hippie girl. She wore a long, flowy, white sundress. The material was so thin I could practically see through it. Her beautiful long, sandy brown hair was straighter than usual. She must have blown it out. And she was wearing a little eye makeup, even though normally she went au naturel.
She placed her hand on my arm. “I hope you like this place. I know it’s likely not what you would’ve chosen.”
“I bet it’s gonna be great if Ollie loves it so much. If the line ever moves, I’ll get to find out.”
“It’s always like this,” Ollie said. “But the food is worth it.”
“I trust your opinion, Ollie. After all, you loved my pie. You’re a man of good taste.”
Eden flashed me a huge smile, and as our eyes locked, we seemed to drift off into our own world.
Fuck, I want her.
Here we were in this busy restaurant line, and all I could think about was being inside of her. Ollie was playing with his iTouch, listening to something. It felt like Eden and I were the only two people in the room.
My heart raced. I knew in that moment that kissing her would be worth the risk. Unable to hold it in anymore, I placed my hand on her waist and pulled her closer to me, for the first time feeling her soft, supple breasts against my chest. I let out a shaky breath, because her body felt so damn good against mine.
She grabbed my shirt and dug her nails into my chest. There was something very erotic about that. It was like she read my mind—I’d fantasized about that very thing last night while watching her from the hotel.
The look in her eyes finally gave me the confirmation I needed. I slowly leaned in, and she pulled me closer. Her eyes turned hazy as she parted her lips, ready to receive my kiss.
The slight moan that escaped into my mouth made my dick harden. And there was no going back as I began to devour her mouth. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. Her lips felt incredible as all of the sounds in the room faded away. I went all in, slipping my tongue out to fully taste her and circling it around hers.
Even though Ollie seemed to be into his game, I knew I had to stop before he noticed something or we got kicked out of this place.
Reluctantly pulling away, I looked at her and mouthed, “That felt so good.”
“I know,” she whispered.
I ran my thumb along her lips, so hungry for more.
“I heard you kiss,” Ollie said nonchalantly.
Eden’s face turned red as we both turned to him.
I cleared my throat. “You did, did you?”
“Yeah. Pretty gross,” he said without turning his attention away from his device.
“Don’t be rude, Ollie,” Eden scolded.
“That’s okay,” I said. “He’s entitled to his opinion. I used to think it was gross when my parents kissed. I get it.”
Ollie scrunched his nose. “Why do people even do it?”
Eden responded, “It’s a way of showing affection.”
“Why don’t you just hug? It’s less slobbery.”
“Because adults like to kiss. We don’t have to explain why,” she said.
I was a little stumped as to how to explain it to him, but I wanted to try. Then a thought popped into my head. “I can try to explain. Maybe when you’re older, you’ll get it. But a hug—it’s like ice cream, right? Nice and sweet. Very good. But a kiss, with the right person, it’s like the full sundae with warm chocolate sauce, whipped cream—the whole shebang. It makes you feel giddy. You know how when you’re eating something and all of a sudden you start humming to yourself because it’s so good? That’s what kissing is like.”
“Remind me not to get a sundae for dessert.”
Eden and I looked at each other and laughed.
We finally got to the point in the line where we could grab a tray.
“Ollie, I’m gonna use you as my guide on what to eat here. I’m following the expert.”
After adequately assessing the aromas, Ollie selected a salad with Thousand Island dressing, roasted chicken with garlic mashed potatoes, and green Jell-O with whipped cream for dessert.
I stuck to my word and put whatever he got on my tray as well.
After I paid for us, we found a booth and sat down.
Ollie had a great appreciation for food. He ate like there was no tomorrow. He’d been the same way with my chicken pot pie—ate every last morsel on his plate and then some. I theorized that maybe without being able to see, his sense of taste was amplified. Eating became that much more important and enjoyable.
While I definitely liked the food, my focus was on Eden: watching her enjoy her meal and feeling my dick twitch every time she licked her lips. That kiss was the best of my life, and I was dying to taste her again.
Desperately needing to get my mind off of sex, I asked, “So is Ollie short for anything?”
“Olivier. Our Mom was part French,” Eden answered.
Probably why I like French fries so much,” Ollie said.
“Could be.” I chuckled. “Come to think of it, I love French fries, too, and I’m a quarter French. You’re onto something. That explains it. Anyway, Olivier is a really cool name.”
As I looked between the two of them, I noticed that he and Eden had the same nose. Other than that, they didn’t really resemble each other.
When Eden caught me staring at her, she blushed. If she blushed like that from a single look, I wondered about her reaction if I did other things to her. We’d done stuff on camera, but there was a huge difference between virtual intimacy and the real thing. It was weird to think that while she’d seen me come, our bodies had hardly ever made contact.
She hadn’t been with anyone in two years. Despite the sexual nature of her job, this shy girl in front of me was the real Eden. Everything she did in front of those cameras was an act; I could see that now.
Ollie interrupted my thoughts. “Can we take Ryder to the trampoline park?”
Eden seemed to think about it for a moment before she said, “No, I don’t think that’s a good idea with your stitches.”
I rustled his hair. “Trampoline park, huh?”
Ollie drank some of his lemonade and nodded. “It’s called Bounce. It’s super cool. I went there once for a birthday party.”
“Yes,” she said. “But that was a small group of kids in a rented section. We can’t just go on short notice when it’s open to the public. It will be a free-for-all, and some kid will knock right into your head. You’re still recovering.”
Ollie looked disappointed, but he nodded in agreement. “You’re right.”
I wondered how many times Ollie had to give things up that typical kids took for granted because of his impairment. He was so mature. Most eleven year olds would be nagging their parents until they got their way. But Ollie only had to be told once before he came to the conclusion that Eden had his best interests in mind. He was a damn good kid. In the short time I’d known him, my admiration for this boy knew no bounds.
I scratched my chin. “You know what I like better than trampolines?”
“What?”
“Standup acts on YouTube. You want to go home and listen to some?”
He smiled. “Yeah.”
***
Back at Eden’s, after I’d hung out with her brother for a while, I joined her in the kitchen while Ollie stayed in his room.
I listened carefully for the sound of his device turning back on. That kid had the most sensitive hearing. When it was clear he was engaged in something that would allow us some privacy, I looked over at Eden. Her eyes were ha
zy, and I knew what she was thinking. I was thinking it, too.
Within seconds, my mouth was on hers. We took up exactly where we’d left off at the restaurant. It was as if our kiss had simply been on hold all night, as if I’d just released a pause button.
She tasted so incredibly good. I felt like a goddamn teenager—so horny, so hungry for her as my tongue explored her mouth. I didn’t know what to do with my hands, because they wanted to go everywhere, touch everything at once. I settled for raking my fingers through her beautiful, long hair that smelled like flowers and coconut.
My hands traveled down her back and landed on her ass. I squeezed it hard and pushed her into me.
Lowering my mouth, I began to suck on her neck, stopping with each movement to notice how her skin was changing color from white to pink. Fuck, that’s such a turn-on.
I really tried to stop myself, but I couldn’t resist lowering my mouth and devouring her breast through the material of her dress. Her nipples were hard, poking through as I circled my tongue around her left one.
Her hands were on the back of my head as she guided me back up and pushed me deeper into her mouth. The sounds she made were killing me. I knew she could feel my erection against her. There was no denying how hard I was, and there was nothing more in the world I wanted right now than to fuck her on this counter. I would’ve given just about anything for that, to wrap her legs around me and empty all of my frustration into her.
But I knew my body was moving way ahead of my mind. Even though the prospect of sex with Eden felt like it was right there, the distance between the present situation and that scenario was like the length of a football field.
I stopped the kiss and buried my head in her neck. “I want you.”
“I want you, too,” she panted.
I looked into her eyes. “I don’t think you understand how much.”
Eden’s breathing became heavier. “I’m scared.”
“I know. That’s why I stopped, even though I really didn’t want to. I know you’re not ready.”
“I mean, you’re leaving in what—a few days?”
“I’m leaving, but I’ll be back.”
“Then what?”
Answering honestly, I said, “I don’t know.”
Love Online Page 10
