Life According to Og the Frog

by Betty G. Birney

  That’s a very good beginning.

  “But he was stolen from his home in McKenzie’s Marsh . . . and that might even be illegal,” she says.

  “I checked, and it’s not illegal here,” Mrs. Brisbane interrupts her.

  “Well, it should be!” Heidi replies. “It’s wrong to take a small, helpless creature away from his family and friends. Away from his enbironment.”

  “Environment,” Mrs. Brisbane corrects her.

  I’m still thinking about the small, helpless creature part. Maybe the bullfrogs think of me that way, but I believe I am an extraordinary leaper, jumper and helper to all green frogs!

  “If you were taken from your home, it would be called kidnapping,” Heidi tells the class.

  I look at the faces of the other big tads, and they are very serious.

  “I wish Og could go back to McKenzie’s Marsh. But since he might make his friends sick, he should go to Piney Woods, where he can be in his own . . . environment,” Heidi continues. But I see her lip quiver a bit. “Even though I’ll really miss you, Og!”

  She quickly sits down, and Mrs. Brisbane calls on someone who is for keeping me in Room 26.

  “I think Og is super cool,” A.J. bellows. “I think he should stay here because he can teach us a lot.”

  “Would you like to tell us more about what Og can teach us?” our teacher asks.

  A.J. hesitates. “Like, what amphibians are like and, um, what it’s like to be cold-blooded. And, um . . . he’s so funny when he goes ‘BOING.’”

  He sits down quickly, just like Heidi did.

  At Piney Woods, I think that I’d be fed, I’d get to be outdoors, and I’d have a bigger space to hop around. I wouldn’t have any enemies, and lots of people would see how cool a green frog can be.

  In Room 26, I have no enemies, everybody loves me, I can help the big tads and Mrs. Brisbane, and I have a new furry friend.

  Humphrey breaks my concentration with some alarmingly loud squeaks. “SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK!!!!”

  “Thanks for your opinion, Humphrey,” Mrs. Brisbane says. I think she’s trying not to laugh.

  And so it goes. Garth rambles on about how animals should never be taken from the wild and why.

  “But Og has already been taken from the wild,” Mrs. Brisbane says. “So now what?”

  Garth mumbles, “Piney Woods,” and sits down.

  When Mrs. Brisbane asks Tabitha, she stares down at her desk and doesn’t say anything. I think I see tears in her eyes. Has she changed her mind?

  Gail is all for keeping me in Room 26. “Because he’s cute and we love him and I can tell he likes it here.”

  It’s a short answer, but she’s right. I do like Room 26. I like the big tads and Mrs. Brisbane. I like my new, clean tank and having a variety of interesting things to eat.

  Despite the fact that I peed on her, Mandy thinks I should stay, because I make her feel cheerier! That’s nice, especially coming from her.

  Richie’s speech is short and sweet. “We took in Og as our classroom pet. We shouldn’t get rid of him. That’s just rude.”

  Seth agrees. “Og makes Room Twenty-six more fun. And he’s good company for Humphrey!”

  “I think he’s cool, too,” Kirk says next. “I want him to stay, but I wonder if that’s selfish. Is he happy here? Would he be happier at Piney Woods?”

  Kirk hesitates, and I feel a joke coming on. “And why are frogs so happy?” he asks. “Because they eat whatever bugs them.”

  All the big tads groan, and Mrs. Brisbane tells Kirk to sit down.

  “Sayeh?” Mrs. Brisbane says. “I think you were in favor of returning Og to the swamp. Where do you stand on Piney Woods?”

  Sayeh stands up and hesitates before she speaks. She doesn’t have any notes.

  I just hope that whatever she says, she speaks loudly enough so we can hear her.

  “Yes, Mrs. Brisbane. I agreed with Heidi that Og was stolen away from his home and his family and friends. It seemed wrong to me, because it wasn’t his choice.”

  Heidi gives Sayeh a thumbs-up sign.

  Sayeh swallows hard and continues. “But I have been thinking a lot about my life. I had a home in a different country. My family and friends were there. And then we moved here, to a faraway place that was very different. We had to leave other family members and friends behind.”

  All the big tads are very quiet. Even Kirk looks serious for once.

  “Like Og, it wasn’t my idea to move,” Sayeh continues. “My parents said we must leave. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. This was a strange place, but soon I had new friends and I liked this new country. I don’t know when it happened, but after a while, this became home. I still think of my old home, but this is where I want to live now. It is my true home.”

  Sayeh stops and looks toward my tank.

  “And I can’t help wondering if this is how it is for Og. Of course, he loved the swamp and his friends and family. But every day, he seems more at home in Room 26. He hops and leaps and makes us laugh. And his great, loud boings remind me to speak up for myself.”

  “BOING-BOING-BOING-BOING!” I agree. Because this is the best speech I’ve ever heard. And I helped Sayeh, and I didn’t even know it!

  The room has been very quiet, but there are a few nervous laughs when I chime in.

  Then Humphrey pipes up with a “SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK!” and my friends burst out laughing.

  “All right, class,” Mrs. Brisbane says with a smile. “Let Sayeh finish.”

  “Thank you, Og, for helping me. I have changed my mind. I think he should stay.” Sayeh sits down.

  I can tell she’s glad to be finished.

  “Thank you, Sayeh!” I say. “BOING-BOING! You have helped me make up my mind.”

  Because I know where my home really is.

  There is great silence in the classroom. Even Humphrey is quiet.

  Suddenly, Tabitha jumps up. “Og helped me, too! This has been a strange place for me, but Og made me feel at home. I don’t know how he did it, but he made me feel like trying. I’m sorry I didn’t say it sooner, but I really want him to stay! And I hope all my new friends in Room Twenty-six agree!”

  “I agree!” I tell her, and she smiles.

  “Thank you for speaking up, Tabitha. Anyone else?” Mrs. Brisbane asks, looking around the room. “Art?”

  “Once I kind of dozed off and Og woke me up before I got in trouble,” Art says. Then he adds, “Sorry, Mrs. Brisbane.”

  “I’ll pay more attention next time.” She laughs. “Og helped me, too.”

  I did, didn’t I? I made her life easier by liking the mealworms, and I helped get Mrs. Brisbane’s attention so she saw that paper Aldo was so worried about.

  It’s true! I’m doing my part as a classroom pet. Now, if only I can keep my job.

  “Thanks to all of you who spoke,” Mrs. Brisbane says. “The lunch bell will ring at any moment. I want each of you to write your decision on one of these slips of paper.” She walks around the room handing them out.

  “BOING!” She didn’t give me one. Or Humphrey.

  “Write ‘Piney Woods’ or ‘Room Twenty-six,’ fold it, and put it in the box by the door on your way out,” Mrs. Brisbane continues. “Do not put your name on it. This is a secret vote.”

  I see my friends writing, but I can’t tell what they’re jotting down.

  The bell rings, and one by one, the big tads file out, each dropping a vote into the box.

  “Thank you,” Mrs. Brisbane tells them as they leave. “I will count the votes when we get back from lunch.”

  Some of the big tads groan. “Can’t you count them now?” A.J. asks.

  “After lunch,” Mrs. Brisbane says firmly.

  They all leave the room, and Humphrey quickly opens his cage door—and ju
st as quickly closes it again.

  I see why. Mrs. Brisbane has come back into the classroom. “Now, where did I leave my lunch?” she asks. I don’t answer, because I think she’s talking to herself.

  Humphrey stares at her intently as she rummages through her handbag, and then through another large bag she carries with her.

  “I’d forget my head if it wasn’t attached,” she mumbles.

  I wouldn’t like to see a headless teacher!

  Then she starts opening all of the desk drawers and searches them.

  There’s still no lunch, so she flings open the closet door and disappears from view. I can hear her muttering to herself.

  When she comes out, she says, “I know I made my lunch this morning. And then I put it in—” She stops suddenly. “I put it in the car! Oh, and now I’ll hardly have time to eat it.”

  She rushes out again.

  Humphrey and I are all alone again. It’s just us and that ballot box in Room 26.

  I stare at the box, knowing my fate will be decided by the slips of paper inside.

  I’m feeling so jumpy, I hardly notice Humphrey open his cage door and skitter across the table. But as I realize he’s sliding down the table leg, I am very nervous.

  “Humphrey! Don’t go! You won’t have time to get back to your cage!” I tell him.

  He darts across the room—and what’s that he has in his mouth? A tiny slip of paper.

  “Come back!” I shout. But Humphrey keeps going.

  The box sits on a stool. It’s a lot lower than our table, but it’s very tall for a small hamster to climb.

  So I am amazed that Humphrey neatly climbs the rungs of the stool and—with great effort—pulls himself up onto the top.

  “Careful, Humphrey!” I tell him.

  Then he stands on his tippy toes and hangs on to the rim of the box with one paw. He drops the paper into the box with the others.

  The box teeters a little and starts to tip.

  “Watch out!” I scream, and give my danger warning. “SCREEE!”

  Humphrey quickly lets go and slides down to the top of the stool. Just as he slides down one leg, the bell rings.

  Lunchtime is over!

  “HURRY!” I shout. “SCREEE! SCREEE!” I just can’t help myself.

  He races across the room as fast as a jackrabbit, grabs the cord to the blinds and starts swinging.

  “Hurry, Humphrey!” I tell him. “Please!”

  The door opens and students stream into Room 26 just as Humphrey lands on the table and speeds toward his cage.

  My heart is pounding even faster than his footsteps as he runs into the cage and closes the door before anyone—except me—notices.

  “You did it!” I tell him. “YOU DID IT!”

  My neighbor weakly answers with a squeak.

  Decision Time

  PLOP. PLOP. PLOP-PLOP. It’s raining. Plop. Plop. Plop-plop. Squeak-squeak-squeak! I’m in my cozy tank in Room 26, and I’m here because I’m a classroom pet who helps my friends, just like Humphrey. I can Float. Doze. Be. And I only get wet when I want to. Because I’m here to stay.

  Too bad it’s just a daydream. The sound of the raindrops on the windows of Room 26 usually calms me, but since this is the day the class is voting on my future, I’m not a bit relaxed, and neither are the big tads.

  Humphrey’s been spinning his wheel nonstop. The poor guy will be exhausted!

  All of the big tads are restless, too. It’s time to count the votes, but Mrs. Brisbane is waiting for one person to arrive.

  One person? Is it Bert? Is it Dr. Okeke?

  Nope. But it’s someone very important: Mr. Morales, the principal. This time, he is wearing a tie with little frogs all over it. They look a lot like me!

  “I decided to have someone from outside Room Twenty-six tally up the votes,” Mrs. Brisbane tells the class.

  Before he begins, Mr. Morales says, “Mrs. Brisbane told me you all put a lot of thought into your votes. So now . . . we’ll find out the final decision.”

  Final decision.

  Go or stay.

  We love you or we don’t.

  You’re in or you’re out.

  There is no in-between.

  But at least I know what I’m hoping for. I hope the vote is for me to stay. Because Humphrey and the big tads have taught me what a good classroom pet should do.

  And if I stay, I vow to be the best classroom pet I can possibly be, cross my toes!

  Of course, if I have to go to Piney Woods, I will still Float. Doze. Be. But in Room 26, I’ve learned that there’s a lot more to life than sitting on a lily pad.

  I’ve learned that a little critter can make a big difference to humans. Humphrey has done that, and I want to do it, too.

  The room is very quiet as Mr. Morales reaches into the box and reads the first vote.

  “Piney Woods,” he says.

  My heart sinks down to the tips of my webbed toes.

  But the next vote is “Room Twenty-six.”

  And then there’s another.

  My mind races as he reads the votes off one by one.

  In the end, there are two votes for Piney Woods. The rest are all for me to stay in Room 26.

  “I guess that’s a clear choice,” Mr. Morales says. “Og will remain as your classroom pet.”

  There are cheers and cheers and more cheers!

  I am cheering, too! Even Heidi and Garth join in.

  I hear some very lively squeaking as well. Thank you, Humphrey!

  Despite all the cheering, Mrs. Brisbane has a worried look on her face.

  “But I’m concerned because I think there were more votes than there are students,” she says.

  Mr. Morales does a quick recount, and Mrs. Brisbane is right. “We have an extra vote. I think it might be this one.”

  He holds up a thin strip of paper that is much smaller than the others.

  “The writing is so small, I can hardly read it,” she says. “But it does say Room Twenty-six.”

  That’s a relief, because if Humphrey didn’t want me to stay, our lives as neighbors might be difficult.

  She looks around the classroom. “Whose vote is this?”

  No one raises a hand or answers.

  “If someone tried to vote twice, I’d like to know about it,” she says, studying the big tads’ faces for a sign.

  They all look so innocent. Because they are innocent.

  And Humphrey doesn’t squeak up because he didn’t vote twice.

  Mrs. Brisbane sighs. “I hope whoever this paper belongs to will let me know privately. Meanwhile, even without this vote, Og will stay.”

  The cheers are deafening!

  BING-BANG-BOING! My heart is hopping around. This is what I wanted all along. I just didn’t know it.

  Even with all the noise, I can hear a small, shrill voice.

  “SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK!”

  “Thank you, Humphrey,” I tell him. “Your vote counts with me!”

  * * *

  I think that we’ll be going back to the normal routine in Room 26, but I am wrong.

  A few days after the vote, Mrs. Brisbane makes an announcement. “Dr. Okeke has invited us to participate in this spring’s Wildlife Fair at Piney Woods. But we have a lot of work to do to get ready.”

  “But you said it’s not until spring,” Garth says.

  “Yes,” Mrs. Brisbane replies. “And the first day of spring is just a little over a month away.”

  And what a month it is!

  In addition to their usual lessons, my friends make big posters for our display at the fair.

  Garth spends a lot of time recording me and I am hoppy to sing all of my favorite songs. But when he mixes them up on the tape, they don’t sound quite as good as the
y do in the swamp.

  Heidi and Gail make up a dance called the Frog Hop and teach it to all the big tads.

  It’s fun to watch Tabitha hop alongside Sayeh and Seth. Tabitha’s giggling even louder than Gail!

  “That will attract people to our display,” Heidi explains.

  “I hope it doesn’t drive them away,” Richie mutters.

  Mrs. Brisbane likes the dance. “But I think we also need to tell people why frogs are threatened and what they can do to help.”

  So my friends get busy making posters, and they show them to me.

  A.J. makes a drawing of a beautiful pond—with people picking up the trash around it. It says KEEP OUR RIVERS AND STREAMS CLEAN across the top.

  Garth draws some bottles with scary labels and puts X’s through them. He writes: KEEP CHEMICALS OUT OF OUR WATER.

  Mandy’s poster has a big factory pumping out black smoke with DON’T POLLUTE in huge letters.

  And Sayeh’s looks just like McKenzie’s Marsh with drawings of all the animals who live there. It says PROTECT OUR MARSHES!

  “Thank you, friends!” I tell them.

  Hearing about all those problems makes me glad I live in a nice clean tank in Room 26!

  “We can take Og to the fair, can’t we?” Tabitha asks one day.

  Mrs. Brisbane thinks that’s a wonderful idea—and so do I!

  “But what about Humphrey?” A.J. asks. “He’s wildlife, too.”

  Gail giggles. “I never saw a hamster in the woods.”

  A.J. shrugs. “Maybe not, but hamsters must live in the wild somewhere.”

  Mrs. Brisbane says he has a point. “I’ll call Dr. Okeke and see if we can take both of them.”

  And that’s how Humphrey and I end up at the Piney Woods Wildlife Fair a few weeks later.

  There’s plenty of wildlife there, from eagles (I just can’t look at those sharp beaks) to somebody walking around in a bear suit. It doesn’t look like any bear I’ve ever seen.

  The wildest wildlife of all are the humans.

  The Frog Hop does attract a lot of people to the display table, where folks of all ages show up to admire Humphrey and me. And that gives the big tads a chance to talk about how frogs are disappearing.