by Melissa Good
She’d spent so long the last time she was here, just sitting, and 260
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watching the water, and wondering what in the hell she’d done so wrong in her life to earn the repeated disappointments dealt to her where her heart was involved.
Now, here she was, sitting here wondering what in the hell she’d done so right in her life to deserve this. She leaned her head against the chair back. And it wasn’t just the ring. It was what was behind it. It was the equal commitment she’d been searching for almost all of her life.
It was what her parents had, and something she’d simply assumed everyone else was entitled to. Jesus, if I’d known how damn rare that is, maybe I’d have entered a convent. She closed her eyes. The last time she’d been here, she’d made the decision to leave her dreams behind.
This time she found the sudden gift so overwhelming, she hardly knew what to do with herself. Slowly, she lifted the ring to her lips and pressed them against it, feeling a single tear wind its way down her cheek.
There was no doubt this was messing her up. She knew it. She knew damn well this was going to make doing her job the way she’d become accustomed to it difficult to the point of impossible.
Kerry’s gentle, loving influence had already wrecked her emotional shields, breaking down icy barriers she’d kept in place almost effortlessly for years. Now she was left with the same responsibilities, the same goals, but without the single minded, cold purpose that allowed her to achieve them.
Damn right she wished the resignation had stuck. Especially now.
She let her eyes slide open, and blinked them, to clear the moisture out.
Right now, she felt a distinct urge to chuck her whole damn career, and take off with Kerry to someplace quiet, someplace small and sleepy.
Maybe she’d open up a little corner computer shop where the most exciting thing that happened in a day was someone catching a boot sector virus.
Her eyes found her lover’s face. But that wasn’t fair to Kerry, either. She’d just gotten started, and besides, she liked Miami.
Dar sighed. She’d just have to see how things worked out, that was all. Maybe she could change the way she did things.
Yeah. Maybe pigs would grow jet engines and take off from an onramp of Interstate 95.
A rattle broke her out of her musing, and she looked up to see the water pot shivering against the shelf, evidently quite well heated. Dar stood up and retrieved it, yelping a little as the heated plastic stung her fingers. ”Ow.” She put it down quickly, then got two cups ready, and set plastic cone filters on top of them, adding scoops of the fragrant ground beans and pouring the water over it. It smelled great, and she took an appreciative sniff, letting her worries go for the time being.
No point in worrying about it now anyway, right?
She fixed the coffee with lots of cream and sugar, then she picked up Kerry’s cup and wandered over to the bed, now gently bathed in Hurricane Watch
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early dawn’s peach colored light. As she neared, sleepy green eyes fluttered open and blinked at her, picking up the light in their depths and highlighting the golden specks that floated in the misty color.
”Hey,” Kerry burred softly, her voice slightly hoarsened from sleep. She cleared her throat. ”What are you doing up?”
Dar smiled, and sat down on the bed, offering her the cup. ”I had to uphold Miami’s reputation for tough natives. I got up to turn the heat on,” she admitted.
Kerry sat up, crossing her legs and accepting the coffee. She pushed her sleep disheveled hair out of her face with an idle hand as she yawned. ”Mm.” She sipped the beverage. ”Thank you, Dar. I really appreciate this.” Her eyes flicked to the quietly pensive look on her lover’s face. ”Where’s yours?”
”Hmm?” Dar started, then smiled. ”Oh, it’s over there. I was just sitting by the fire waiting for the water to heat up.”
”Mm, sounds nice.” Kerry slid her legs out from under the covers, and stood, taking Dar’s hand in hers. ”C’mon, let’s go back over there.”
She clung to the long fingers as they crossed the cabin, and didn’t let go as they seated themselves by the fire. ”I had a dream about you.”
Dar almost inhaled a bit of her coffee. ”Um, yeah?” she replied.
”Good or bad?”
Kerry chuckled as she took another sip. ”Oh, awful. You turned into a bug eyed giant rabbit and went bouncing all over the place, drooling.” She glanced over, to see wide, round blue eyes staring at her.
”I’m joking.”
She put a hand on Dar’s leg, stroking it gently. ”It was a wonderful dream. It didn’t make much sense, but you were in it, and so was I, and a white horse, and it was summer. and there was a really beautiful grassy meadow.” Kerry exhaled happily. ”And we were laughing, and running through the grass, chasing after the horse.”
Dar smiled. ”Sounds like fun. Did we catch it?”
”Yes.” Kerry lifted their still linked hands and kissed Dar’s fingers.
”And we rode off together, just like we were riding yesterday.”
A faint twinge reminded her. ”How’re the legs?” Dar asked her.
”Still sore?”
Kerry flexed her thighs and considered. ”Just a little, but they’re okay. My shoulder’s okay too,” she added, before she could be asked.
”C’mon, let’s grab a shower, and get dressed. I can’t wait to get out on the water.”
”You got it.” Dar grinned. ”I can pick up a basket of pastries and a thermos. We could have breakfast out there. How about it?”
”I like it.” Kerry released her, and stood, stretching luxuriously, then giving a little yelp of surprise as Dar enfolded her in a bear hug.
”Urp.” She felt herself lifted up off the ground. ”Whoa.”
The grip gently straightened her spine, though, and she threw her arms around Dar’s neck with a soft laugh. She could almost feel the 262
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emotion going through her lover, and she exhaled, as Dar finally released her back to her own feet. ”Boy, that felt great.”
Dar rubbed her back and gently kissed her head. ”Yes, it did.” She playfully scooped a handful of sunlight, letting it sparkle off her ring and send tiny flashes darting around the room. ”C’mon, let’s go.”
THE SUN POURED down on ruffled blue waters, unobstructed by a single cloud, and warm enough to offset the chill of the wind that coasted over the lake. Kerry expertly turned the small boat and filled the sails, sending them over the waves, and causing a cold spray to dust their skin.
Dar was seated in the bow, her long body sprawled over a padded seat, and her face turned into the breeze as they plowed through the waves. ”This is great, ”she sighed.
Kerry smiled, as she moved the tiller, and checked the tension on the sail. ”It sure is,” she agreed, her body dredging up old memories of many hours spent out on Lake Michigan in boats not much larger than this one. ”The best day of my young life was the day I got qualified in a sunfish, and I didn’t have to have anyone with me when I went out.”
Dar reached out and touched the canvas sail, as she watched Kerry’s smooth, and precise motions. ”You’re good at this,” she commented, enjoying the sight of her lover’s wind whipped figure.
”And you look really cute doing it too.”
”Oh sure. I probably look like an afghan hound with his head out the window of a car going down US 1.” Kerry laughed. ”Glad the sun’s pretty strong, though, or it’d be really cold out here.” She tied down the sail, then balanced herself and pulled off her heavy sweatshirt, leaving herself only her collared rugby top over her jeans. ”Whoo, that’s better.”
Dar followed suit, taking off her tan sweater and tucking it under the seat, and pushing the sleeves up on the bright red shirt she was wearing underneath. ”You ready for some breakfast?” she inquired.
”You bet. I’m starving,” Kerry informed her, as she edged the bo
at towards one of the small islands that dotted the lake’s wide surface. ”I figure we can shelter on the lee of that land there, until we’re ready to go back.” She studied the wind. ”I’ll have to tack back, but that’s okay.
We’ve got all the time in the world. Right?”
The words brought a smile to Dar’s face. ”Right.” She edged closer to where Kerry was sitting, and broke a freshly baked blueberry muffin in half, offering a portion to Kerry. ”Here, take a nibble of this.”
”Mmm. ” Kerry captured it in her teeth and chewed. ”Oo, you have more of those?”
”I have more of those,” Dar informed her. ”And I have those ones with all the nuts in them you liked, and I have cornbread.”
Kerry stopped chewing. ”Cornbread? I don’t get it.”
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”Northerner,” Dar snorted softly. ”Here.” She took out a miniature loaf of the corn bread, and spread some soft, sweet butter on it. Then she drizzled a touch of honey over that, and broke off a piece, putting it in Kerry’s open and waiting mouth. ”Try that.”
Kerry closed her mouth and chewed. ”Mmm.” It was a rougher texture than the almost cake like muffin, and the butter and honey made a nice counterpoint to the earthy taste of the corn. ”Oh, I like it. Now I know why the South lost the Civil War; they were too busy cooking.”
Dar laughed in pure reflex. ”I don’t think that’s why, but we definitely go in for comfort foods in the South.” She moved down the padded seat while Kerry skillfully moved around one of the small islands, blocking the wind. She took down the sail and tossed over the small anchor, then squirmed over to where Dar was, leaning against her as they rocked gently in the waves.
She let her eyes roam the skies overhead, watching a hawk circle lazily. Dar reclined next to her, breaking off mouthfuls of her assorted goodies and popping them in Kerry’s mouth as they shared companionably.
”Jesus, this has been such a long week,” Kerry commented.
”Uh huh.” Dar fed her another bit of cornbread. ”I’m glad we had a few days up here just to relax.” She paused. ”Well, sort of,” she chuckled. ”Barring a fall from a horse or two.” She brought out a large thermos and uncapped it, releasing an intoxicating scent of chocolate into the air.
Kerry accepted the cup of hot chocolate, and gave Dar a gentle kiss.
”It’s been wonderful despite the horse.” She gazed into the blue eyes.
”We’ll have to come up here again when we can spend more time.”
They were sitting in the bottom of the boat, with their heads resting against the padded back seat, and Dar shifted, slipping an arm behind Kerry and drawing her closer.
Kerry put the cup down, and half turned, sliding her hands over Dar’s shirt and tangling her fingers in the fabric, as she willingly met the lips searching for hers. They tasted each other for a breathless moment, then backed off a little, as Dar reached up and stroked Kerry’s face. ”I wish we didn’t have to go back.”
Kerry studied her face, evaluating the statement. ”You mean that.”
The blue eyes dropped. ”Yes.” Dar exhaled, as she regarded the rippling water. ”I keep trying to dredge up interest in going back into that office on Monday, and I just can’t,” she confessed. ”I don’t know if I can just go back to business as usual.”
Kerry's blonde head cocked to one side. ”Dar, I don’t understand. I thought you’d worked things out with Alastair. Did something else happen?” She put a hand on her lover’s arm in concern.
A soft laugh. ”Sort of.” Dar’s lips twisted into a wry smile. ”We happened,” she stated quietly. ”I don’t think I can put that aside, when I have to be the company bastard anymore.” She glanced up at Kerry 264
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honestly. ”There are things I’ve done that I couldn’t do now, not and look you in the eye at the end of the day.”
Kerry felt a little shocked. She hadn’t expected that, hadn’t even considered it, really. ”Dar, you don’t know that. I mean we’ve hardly had a chance to—”
”I do know it,” Dar interrupted gently. ”I knew it that afternoon up at Disney.” She picked up Kerry’s hand. ”When I wouldn’t trade a roll in the sack for a contract just because you were there.”
A slow intake of breath. An exhale. ”Oh.”
”Yeah,” Dar murmured. ”What you think of me matters, Kerry. I’ve never had to worry about that before.” She tangled her fingers with her lover’s. ”I can’t do things the old way.”
Kerry tried to jump start her brain into action. ”Find another way then,” she offered, faintly. ”We can do it, you and I.”
A long pause, as the hawk called overhead, lonely and regal.
Finally, Dar blinked. ”Maybe,” she murmured. ”I guess we’ll find out.”Kerry studied her lover’s body language, often a far more accurate guide to her feelings than her speech was. “Are you tired of doing what you’re doing, Dar?”
The sound of the waves floated over them for a few minutes. “I...”
Dar paused. “I think I’m just tired of it never ending,” she admitted. “It never gets any better. It’s just one fight after another, one crisis after another. I’m just over it.”
“Wow,” Kerry murmured.
“I’ve been doing this a long time,” Dar went on. “I was just thinking it would be damn nice to just take a few weeks off and, I don’t know, just do nothing.”
“Funny,” her partner mused. “I couldn’t wait to start working because I felt like I was finally doing something useful with my life.”
She nudged the sail a bit with one foot. “The one thing I knew I didn’t want to be was someone who just stayed home and did nothing.”
Dar looked at her. “Wow,” she echoed.
“But you know what?” Kerry continued. “It would be okay to do that if it was with you. I could spend the rest of my life just doing nothing with you and be happy.” She looked at Dar’s profile. “And no, I’m not just saying that because it’s romantic and goopy and it would make you feel better.”
Dar’s lips twitched, as she bit off exactly that accusation. “Well,”
she sighed. “Now that Alastair’s okay with us maybe we can work together to change things back there,” she said. “At least I’ll have success to go back with. Maybe that’ll help.”
Kerry traced Dar’s cheekbone with her finger. “If not, we’ll make a change,” she said. “Now we can be partners all the time, and I know that’s going to make a difference to a lot of people in how they treat me.”
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“Good or bad?” Dar wondered.
“Both,” Kerry acknowledged. “But you take your advantages where you find them. I learned that the hard way growing up.”
“Mm. We’ll see,” Dar said. “What the hell. Let’s give it a try.
What’s another challenge anyway?”
Kerry nodded, profoundly relieved. ”Right.” She rubbed Dar’s hand against her face. ”Speaking of challenges, you ready to learn to sail?”A smile spread across Dar’s face. ”Yeah.” She cupped Kerry’s cheek affectionately. ”Teach me.”
Chapter
Twenty
”WHEW.” KERRY ADJUSTED the strap on her laptop case and handed over her suitcase to the skycap, as Dar bent her head to listen to his mate, who was processing their boarding passes. ”We’ve got time for a cup of coffee, Dar. You interested?”
Dar glanced over her shoulder and smiled. ”You bet.” She accepted the boarding passes from the porter, and rejoined her companion, zipping up her jacket a little as they moved along the concourse towards the door. ”I think we’re getting outta here just in time. Did you see those clouds?”
Kerry peered back the way they came, where lowering, gray clouds obscured the sunset, and nodded. ”Yeah, I think you’re right, partner.”
She patted Dar on the back. ”Unless I’m really mistaken, you’re going to miss a snowstorm.”
”You want a snowball fight? You got it, but let me warn you it’s only fun for about the first ten minutes.” Kerry smiled, her eyes crinkling up all the way. “After that, you just want dry towels and hot chocolate.”
“Problem with that?”
“Nope.” She tucked a hand into the crook of Dar’s elbow and walked her inside, dodging a moving cart as they moved towards the security station. ”Whoops, time for the strip search.” She released Dar, and put her laptop case and purse on the belt, then shrugged out of her jacket and added that, since it had her cell phone and pager in the pockets. Then she stepped through the security gate and smiled at the guard as she went to pick up her things.
”Excuse me, we need you to open this,” the young woman behind the table stated, holding onto Kerry’s laptop firmly.
Kerry sighed. ”Sure.” She unzipped the case and laid it open, exposing the slate gray top of her computer. She was aware of Dar’s close presence, as the taller woman was also being asked to open her bag. ”Why don’t we have this much trouble at Miami,” she muttered Hurricane Watch
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under her breath.
Dar chuckled softly, unzipping the case and opening it. “I’m not carrying Cuban cigars, that’s why.”
”Could you turn them on, please?” the woman asked, implacably.
Blue eyes and green met in wry exasperation. ”Sure.” Dar flipped her power switch on, then reached over and got Kerry’s. ”I have Pinball loaded on there if you’re interested.” She remarked to the guard.
The woman looked frostily at her. ”Thank you. Could you turn on your phones and pagers, please?”
One dark eyebrow rose. ”You don’t want me to do that,” Dar drawled.
”Yes ma’am, I do, unless you’d rather do it in the security offices,”
