by Ella Miles
Zeke looks at me with a nervous expression. We both know where this is going.
“If you were to become Black, you need the ability to extract important information out of any man you capture. No matter if they are your enemy or friend.”
Please, no.
“Zeke has a past, a secret he has never told anyone, even you, Miss Miller.”
No, no, no.
“Your job is to extract this secret via any means possible,” Archard continues.
FUCK!
“You can use any tools or weapons you deem necessary to extract this information.” Archard points to a table in the corner with various weapons.
Shit.
I can’t use any of that on Zeke. And even if I wanted to, he’s stronger, more powerful than I am.
“You can bring in any person you need to help subdue him, but you are the one who has to do all the torturing. And you can torture him, even to death, so as long as you get the information.”
I can’t bring myself to look at Zeke as I feel the tears in my eyes. There is no way I will be able to hurt him.
“Who does Enzo have to torture?” I ask, my voice stronger than I feel.
“I’m sorry, but I’m not allowed to tell you that information. That is part of the game. Enzo doesn’t know who you are torturing, and you don’t know who he is torturing.”
But I already know who he’s torturing, the only person he would give his life for—Liesel. His everything. I saw how her contact was written on his phone when he was scrolling absentmindedly through his phone last night, trying to distract himself from what is to come. It broke my heart at the time, now it destroys me.
“Any other questions?”
“So the winner is whoever extracts the information first?”
“Yes.”
I can’t let Enzo hurt Liesel.
But I can’t hurt Zeke.
There has to be another way.
“I have monitors in both rooms I will be watching. I know the information each prisoner contains, and I’ll know when that information is extracted. Otherwise, there are no rules.”
“I don’t get to know what information I’m looking for?”
“No.”
Archard walks to the door, “When the fog horn sounds, you may begin.”
And then he’s gone, locking the door behind him.
And I’m left alone with Zeke. But I still can’t bring myself to look at him. I need a second to breathe, to think, to find a way out of this mess before I lose my soul by torturing a man who doesn’t deserve it.
The fog horn sounds, giving me no time. Not enough time to figure out how to save us all.
And then I hear a scream so loud it sends vibrations through the entire boat. A cry that will live inside me forever. A cry of a heart breaking.
Enzo’s cry, scream, growl all rolled into one. It’s a cry of a warrior about to face a battle. The cry of a man so destroyed by what he has to do. And I know I have limited time to save Enzo. Because there is no way he’s going to back down from this challenge, even if it destroys him in the process.
THE FIRST THING I do is walk to the door, testing to see if I’m locked in.
I am.
I’m trapped in this nightmare.
And the only way to get out is to torture one of the few people in the world who loves me.
Slowly, I turn to face Zeke, who is still standing there with his hands in his pockets. He’s still weak from getting attacked before because of me. And scars etch into his tan skin. I can’t cause more.
I bite my lip as I try to figure a way out of this. It’s just a puzzle I need to solve, that’s all. I don’t have to torture anyone.
“What is your secret, Zeke?” I ask, maybe it will be that simple. Zeke cares about me, loves me even, not in a romantic way, but in an—I’m your big protective brother who will beat the shit out of anyone who touches you, sort of way.
“I can’t,” he says.
I frown. “Why not? You care about me. You definitely care about Enzo. He’s in the other room right now, torturing Liesel. She’s suffering. He’s suffering. You can end it all if you just tell me.”
“I can’t,” he repeats.
“Why not?” Maybe the secret is truly so big he can’t spill it. Even to save himself. To save me. To save Liesel. To save Enzo.
We don’t speak, just peer into each other’s souls. What are you hiding, Zeke? What is so important you can’t tell me to stop the pain?
“Because you can’t win,” he finally says.
“What?”
“I can’t let you win.”
I frown. “But I thought…”
Zeke walks over to me and puts his arms on my shoulders, like I’m the one who needs comforting instead of him. He’s the one about to be tortured.
“I can’t let you win because I love you, Kai. And I love Enzo too.”
I nod. “I know that.”
“And I can’t let you win, because you deserve better than this life. Enzo doesn’t know anything different. He doesn’t know how to handle his problems without using his fists or a gun. You haven’t killed anyone. You are still innocent and pure. You can be free when these stupid games are over. You can find a life with true happiness. And if I tell you my secret, then you will be one step closer to being trapped in this life forever. I would never forgive myself if I did that. Enzo would never forgive me. And if you are being honest with yourself, you would never forgive me.”
“Will Liesel give away her secret to help Enzo win?” I ask, my voice filled with hope.
“No.”
“Why not? She’d rather him win than me.”
“Probably, but I know what her secret is. She’d rather die than share it with Enzo.”
“Enzo won’t torture her. He loves her,” I say.
He doesn’t blink as he says his next words, “Not as much as he loves you.”
My eyes water. I’ve wanted Enzo to show me he loves me this whole time. I want him to tell me he loves me. But not like this. Not by keeping me from torturing a man. Not by keeping me innocent. Not by hurting the only woman he ever loved before me. Not by breaking his own promise to her to keep her safe.
“Don’t hurt her,” I send out a plea to Enzo. If neither of us tortures our prisoner, then neither of us can win. But then I’m pretty sure we’d all die in these cabins, because I’m sure the rules that Archard is following states to not let us out of these rooms until one of us has extracted the secret.
“What do I do?” I ask Zeke.
He opens his mouth to speak but is interrupted by another horrendous scream. Liesel’s scream.
Fuck, I’m out of time to decide. Enzo has chosen. And he chose to torture Liesel.
I feel the tears drop down my cheek as a tiny crack in my heart forms. Enzo isn’t perfect. Far from it. But I love him. I love how fiercely he protected me, even from himself, but can I forgive him for hurting a woman as broken as I am?
Zeke’s eyes are filled with moisture too, and I know his heart is breaking just as mine is, but he won’t relent. He won’t tell me his secret, because he needs Enzo to win, at all costs. And the cost this time, might be too great.
“What do I do?” I repeat my question.
“Whatever you need to,” Zeke answers.
Whatever I need to.
What I need to be able to live with myself.
What I need to do to save Enzo.
Because he is the man I love above all else.
I love him. And I won’t let him torture Liesel, and in turn, destroy himself.
I love Enzo—I would eventually forgive him for this. That’s what love is.
But Enzo doesn’t love anyone, including himself. He won’t be able to forgive himself for this. And I know that pain is something he will never be able to stop living with.
I walk over to the table and examine every weapon. I run my hands over each of them, feeling the pain they will enact with only a touch because I’ve felt every one
of these weapons myself. I’ve felt the pain.
I close my eyes, sucking the tears back inside as I pick up my weapon. Already knowing my soul is about to turn black. My heart and soul are about to be given to the devil, freely. I’m about to curse my soul to hell, all to save a man I love. And I’m going to deserve every moment of fire and torture I’ll get.
20
ENZO
MY SCREAM IS primal and evil and love and sacrifice and fucking everything. The scream sucks my life from me, while also energizing me.
And I curse my father who is burning in hell for creating this disgusting, cruel game.
But then what did I expect?
My father prepared me my entire life for this exact game. Which is why I learned to never truly love another person, so if I was forced to hurt them, it wouldn't truly matter because I wouldn't love them. My heart is guarded from the world because I don't love. And the world is safe from me because I can do what is necessary to prevent truly evil things from hurting the innocent, even at the cost of my friends.
But there is just one problem with my plan. Somehow along the way, my heart opened, maybe not enough to love, but enough to make vows of loyalty. Vows that tiptoe on the edges of loving another person.
I’ve only ever made two vows in my life. One to protect Liesel. The other to save Kai. And I’m about to break one of those vows today, because I can only save and protect one of them.
This shouldn’t hurt me; my soul is already stained black. I already surrendered my heart to the devil years ago, when my mother died because of my gun. Because I couldn’t save her.
And if I don’t decide quickly, I won’t be able to save either woman.
“What is your secret?” I ask Liesel. Hoping she will spare us all a lot of pain by just fucking telling me. But then Liesel was never one to save me back. I’ve protected her countless times, but she’s never protected me. Not that I deserve anyone’s protection.
“I can’t tell you,” she says, crossing her legs as she takes a seat on the chair I’m meant to interrogate and torture her in.
“Why?” I growl.
“Because I want to protect you.”
I scoff. “You’ve never wanted to protect me before.”
Our eyes burn into each other, sharing our pain, the love we could have had if we weren’t both raised in this fucked up world.
“Fine, I want to protect myself. I want to protect what little love you have for me, because if I tell you my secret, it will break you. You will hate me, and I can’t live with your hate,” she says.
Finally, the truth.
Hearing Liesel’s truth is so different from when Kai spills a secret to me. When Kai tells me a truth, it’s because she wants me to know her better. When Liesel tells a truth, it’s to hide more of herself from me.
“Tell me, Liesel. Make this simple, easy. Get back at my father. You hate him as much as I do. It would be like killing him all over again if we defied his game, and I learned your secret without hurting you.”
She smirks, looking bored. “It would be great revenge.”
Yes, please, just tell me. I don’t even care what it is. Just tell me.
“Tell me your secret. Whatever it is won’t change things between us.”
“It will break your heart.”
“You forget, I don’t have a heart to break.”
“That’s a lie, and we both know it.”
I frown. Come on, Liesel. Just tell me.
I reach into my back pocket and pull out my phone and scroll until I find her number. Then I hand it to her. Hoping to pull on her heartstrings.
She stares at the phone, at the name I’ve given her number in my phone.
My everything.
Liesel tears up at the contact entry. She never cries. Never. But she does now.
I kneel down in front of her. Knowing this could be it—the moment where I win a game before it even starts.
“You see, there is nothing you could tell me that I wouldn’t forgive you for. You wouldn’t even have to ask for my forgiveness; I would just give it—freely. I give it now, before you even tell me, because there is nothing you could say that would make me feel differently about you. You are my everything. You have been since your big brown eyes showed up on my doorstep when we were ten. You mean the world to me. I’ve vowed to protect you, to never let anyone hurt you, including me. Don’t make me break my promise to you.”
Liesel reaches out and touches my heart, feeling the unrelenting pounding in my chest. I wish I could say it was beating so wildly because of her. Maybe then she’d tell me her secret, but it’s beating for Kai. Longing to go rescue her from her own torture in the other room.
Because I know who’s she’s trapped with—Zeke. A man she’s formed a bond with I can’t understand. It could be Langston, she’s formed a relationship with him as well, but Langston is still mine, while Zeke has become hers.
I send out a silent plea to Kai. Don’t you dare touch him. Just wait. Let me win this one. I’m so close.
I don’t send the plea because I’m worried about Zeke. He’s withstood plenty of torture before, and I know Kai can’t physically hurt him too badly. But because I don’t want Kai to relinquish the part of herself that is pure and innocent. The part of herself that makes her her. The part that is holy and sacred and hers. If she sacrifices her soul, it will only be for one reason. To save me. And I don’t deserve her saving.
I look down at where Liesel still rests her hand against my chest. I take her hand calmly and bring her palm to my lips. I kiss her palm sensually.
“Please,” I beg. “Please tell me. I already forgive you for whatever it is.”
“You’re a liar, Enzo Black.”
I frown. “I’m not.”
She shakes her head, hands me back my phone, and then pulls her palm from my grasp.
“I’m not your everything, not anymore. And you will never forgive me.”
“Liesel, please,” I beg again. I’ve never begged a woman so much in my life. But there is only one woman I would beg like this for: Kai, the woman who means sea itself. A woman that has conquered the sea, along with her fears and my heart.
“Please,” I whisper one last time.
“I can’t.”
I stand, closing my eyes and turning away from Liesel. And then I let the darkness in. It doesn’t take much, it’s always in my heart, locked in the deepest part. It takes everything I have to keep the evil in and not let it out without me telling it to be free. But it’s always there. Always ready when I need it, even when I don’t.
It’s the part of me that escaped its cage when I thought Kai had betrayed me. And I almost burned us all down in the process.
It’s why even when I have to do evil things, I rarely let the monster out. I prefer to handle all the cruel things myself. I let myself feel every drop of pain, but that only feeds the monster more.
But this time, the only way I’m going to be able to hurt Liesel and save Kai is by letting the monster out.
So I do.
I stare at the table filled with weapons, and the monster laughs. I don’t need a weapon to torture Liesel. Even the cruelest part of me isn’t that cruel to hurt a woman in that way. And even if I did, Liesel is too strong to be broken with knives, whips, or guns.
She’s faced it all at my father’s hand and never broke.
But I know what Liesel is truly afraid of because I know her better than any other man. And I know I won’t have to lay a finger on her to force the truth from her. Because the threat of pain is worse than the actual pain for her. And I know how to play with her head to get to the truth.
“Stand up,” I say not turning to look at her, keeping my voice calm and cool.
The monster is out and ready; my body is flaming with the fire always burning inside me. What I wouldn’t give to touch Kai right now and steal some of her cold, cool calmness.
I pick up the rope, the only weapon I will touch.
And then I tu
rn to face Liesel, sliding the two strands of rope into my back pocket so she can’t see which weapon I chose.
She’s standing almost eye to eye with me in her ten-inch heels. I used to admire her for looking so fierce in shoes and outfits like the one she’s wearing. A dark red dress and shiny silver shoes that make her look like sex and nothing else. But now, I see nothing but the scared little girl I saw in the hallway all those years ago when she watched me shoot my mother to end her pain—the moment I let the monster in.
Liesel stands not because she chooses to follow my orders, but so I can see the defiance in her eyes, and I know how much I’m going to have to break her to end this. And have a chance at saving Kai from creating her own monster.
“Back up,” I say, taking a step forward.
“No,” she says defiantly.
And then I use a voice I’ve never used with Liesel before. A voice I hate.
“Back up,” my voice booms, bringing with it the fire of hell.
She stumbles back, the fear creeping over her now pale skin.
My eyes blaze with the fury my father put inside me all those years ago. I stand taller as the monster grows inside me.
I take another step, pushing Liesel back with my body without touching her because she fears what I might do to her. She stops when her back hits the wall behind her.
“Strip,” I growl, my voice low.
She grips her dress and pulls it over her head quickly. And I can see what she thinks, that seeing her naked will somehow turn me on and make me stop this. I won’t hurt her when I remember she’s a woman, and I don’t hurt women.
But I don’t lust after Liesel, not anymore. My cock only points toward one woman these days—Kai.
Liesel smirks, but it doesn’t reach her eyes as she stands naked in front of me except for her shoes. Her long flowing hair and large tits make her look all woman, and sexy as a goddess. But it does nothing to my body. My cock doesn’t even stir.
