by Kari Edgren
“Once the meeting is over, I will make a full confession to the constable.”
“No,” I said, surprising everyone in the room, including myself. “You would be of more use trying to find out who is behind these letters.”
“You can’t mean it,” Henry protested. “He tried to kill you!”
“My life remains in danger while this other person is at large. If Nathan is truly sorry for his crimes, then he will do everything in his power to discover this man’s identity.” Deep in my gut, I knew this was the right thing to do. It was my best hope to learn who killed my mother and grandmother, and the only way I could ever be free. “Will you do this for me?”
Nathan rose out of bed and knelt before me. “On my soul, I will do everything in my power to help you.”
Teme moved to stand beside Henry. “Fail, Minister, and we will cut you into a thousand pieces.”
Nathan stood and looked Teme straight in the eyes. “There will be no need,” he said softly. “If I fail, I’ll do it myself.”
Chapter Eighteen
An Unexpected Visitor
For the next hour we debated how best to draw the anonymous letter-writer out into the open. It would have been to our advantage for Nathan to continue acting as though he thought me guilty, but since word of his overnight stay had most likely reached every ear in Hopewell by now, some kind of explanation was necessary to allay further suspicion. We needed the person to think that Nathan was simply wavering and required additional persuasion. To accomplish this, he would openly address his visit to Brighmor in meeting this morning while speaking in noncommittal terms about my possible innocence.
After that, our strategy was remarkably straightforward. Nathan would wait for another letter. Once it arrived, he would reply and then Teme and Henry would begin watching the abandoned dairy around the clock. This plan was more passive than I would have liked, but anything more aggressive might have given us away.
We were deep in conversation when someone knocked on the bedroom door. I immediately put a finger to my lips for quiet. “Come in,” I called.
Mary opened the door and poked her head into the room, her eyes growing bigger as she took in our group. Not that she hadn’t expected to see us, but all assembled, we must have looked quite a sight. “Good morning, ma’am. Would ye be needing help to dress for meeting?” she asked me.
Meeting would have to take precedent over visiting the Otherworld this morning. “I’ll be over shortly. Would you please instruct Karta to have breakfast brought up for our guests?”
“Yes, ma’am,” Mary said. She darted furtive looks at both Nathan and Teme.
“That will be all.” Until I knew which servant was speaking behind my back, everyone had to be considered a possible suspect.
With a quick curtsy, she left the room, pulling the door closed behind her.
“I believe it is all decided then,” Henry said and turned to Teme. “While the three of us are at meeting, you should return to your village to rest. We can meet up tonight to discuss any new developments. And I would like to see all the letters from this anonymous writer.”
“I’ll bring them,” Nathan said.
Henry narrowed his eyes in thought. “We can’t meet at Brighmor again without raising suspicions. Is there another place where we won’t be seen?”
Teme nodded. “Selah’s altar. I will be there at dusk.”
My brows rose up in surprise. “You found that, did you?”
“The Lenape have always known of it.”
And all this time I assumed it to be my secret.
I turned to Nathan. “What about you? Do you know of it as well?”
He looked uncomfortable, shifting his weight from foot to foot. “I stumbled upon an altar of sorts last night when I was hiding in the woods.”
I sighed. “Very well then. My altar it is.”
Henry and I arrived at meeting just as it was scheduled to start and took seats near the door. Any talking was frowned upon at this time, leaving people to glance curiously between Nathan and me. By the looks we both received, word of his stay had spread quickly.
To pass the time, I found myself looking at the men seated on the opposite side of the room, wondering which of them might be harboring a secret hatred toward the Kilbrid women sufficient to commit murder. All of the young men could be ruled out, since my grandmother was drowned nearly thirty years ago, putting the culprit somewhere in his middle-forties at the youngest. As the minutes dragged on, I carefully studied each man, slowly moving from face to face. But try as I may, I found absolutely nothing to warrant concern. I had to consider the possibility that the man might not even be Quaker.
Oh, this is just splendid! I thought bitterly. Already unable to trust any of my servants, I now had to be suspicious of every man over the age of forty-five. If this person were not caught soon, I would surely develop a lasting paranoia. With a sigh closely bordering on a huff, I tried to quiet my mind and find some semblance of peace.
Unfortunately, exhaustion found me first. In the past five days I had been openly accused of witchcraft, delivered a baby, attended a ball, saved two lives and been nearly drowned. It was a wonder to be awake at all. The room had grown overly warm, and before long my head began to bob precariously. At the last moment, I jerked myself awake only to find Henry and several of the other men watching me. Embarrassed by such an unladylike display, I put on my most dignified expression and stared straight ahead without looking at any of them.
Despite my determination, only a few minutes passed before I started to drift off again. Luckily, Nathan chose this time to stand from his seat on the raised benches. My nerves jumped in anticipation and I sat up straighter, eager to hear what he had to say. Clearing his throat, he spoke in his usual confident manner.
“My friends, many of you may have heard that I went out to Brighmor late last night to meet with Selah. We spoke at length and I now stand before you this morning deeply troubled by the nature of my vision. A cover of darkness has obscured my sight, but the inward light will prevail. I trust the spirit will guide me in my quest for the truth.” Sitting back down, Nathan rested his elbows on his knees and bowed his head.
By no means a full accounting of his rotten behavior, his words at least offered a promising start. I felt satisfied for the time being, knowing that his brevity served a greater purpose. If all went as planned, I would expect a more comprehensive apology once we had apprehended the murderer.
After Nathan had spoken, Edgar and Gideon each stood to offer their own impromptu sermons. I tried to be attentive while they preached, but it was pure agony waiting for the next hour to pass, and I resorted to pinching myself just to stay awake. When the meeting finally concluded, I practically jumped to my feet to shake off the sleepiness. Several women immediately gathered around, their curiosity waking me fully. Rachel Dowling asked outright about my conversation with Nathan. “We just talked,” I told her, and everyone else who stood close enough to hear. “He was concerned there may have been a mistake.”
Anne didn’t pry for answers in front of the other women, though I knew she wasn’t convinced by my vagueness. Nora simply leaned closer to whisper that she would be coming over to Brighmor very soon and expected to hear what really happened. Glancing toward the far end of the room, I saw Nathan having a similar experience with the Elders. Gideon looked quite serious while he spoke. Edgar just smiled and patted Nathan reassuringly on the back.
Henry extracted me from the crowd. “Ladies, I’m afraid Selah is worn out from dancing and talking most of the night. You must allow me to take her home for a rest.”
The women grudgingly agreed, and I left the meetinghouse with Nora on one arm. “How did you ever manage without him?” she teased when Henry left to get the shay.
“I’ve truly no idea,” I admitted.
Nora lau
ghed and squeezed my arm. “Well, I’m glad to see you two have made up. I’ll try to get away this evening. Otherwise, expect me first thing in the morning.”
Judging by her no-nonsense look, it was best to just agree and decide later what to divulge. Henry pulled up and I kissed Nora goodbye on the cheek, before getting into the carriage.
“And don’t think I’ll be satisfied with hearing how you two just talked,” she said. “Take a good nap, because I want every detail.”
“Why not just tell her?” Henry asked when we had passed through town and started on the two-mile stretch toward home.
“Because it’s not the easiest story to believe,” I reminded him. “The last thing I want is all my friends thinking me crazy. Besides, Brigid hasn’t given permission and it’s not near as difficult to hide my gift from my best friend as it is from my...” I stopped abruptly, uncertain what to call him. “Are you my husband?” I asked him.
Henry kept his eyes focused on the road and the ripening wheat. “I don’t think so. Kilbrid isn’t my real name. The contract wouldn’t be legal.”
“You could always assume my cousin’s name,” I argued. “Or we could get married in secret using your real name. Then it would be lawful.”
He remained silent, staring straight ahead while I continued to plan how best to formalize our union.
“It wouldn’t be safe to have the ceremony performed in Hopewell or Philadelphia,” I said. “But we could go to New York or even to Boston. I’ve always wanted to see Boston. If we left tonight, we could be married within a week.” I glanced at him, expecting his excitement to equal my own.
“We can’t,” he said, shaking his head slowly.
“Why not?” A wretched thought popped into my mind. “Don’t you want to marry me? I mean after everything you said last night, I just assumed you wanted me to be your wife.” In danger of babbling, I clamped my mouth shut. If he didn’t want to marry me, there was no use running on and embarrassing myself further. Maybe he regretted all his talk of love. Or my ancestry had proven too much for him. Tears sprang into my eyes, and I hastily wiped them away.
Henry brought the shay to a stop. Tying the reins, he reached over and pulled me onto his lap.
“What are you doing?” I gasped.
“Explaining why we can’t marry—”
“If you don’t want to then just say so,” I interrupted angrily. “We can forget everything that happened.” I struggled to get off his lap, the remnants of my dignity quickly disappearing.
“Not upon my soul,” he said, holding me even tighter. “I love you, Selah, and will have no other woman for my wife. But I cannot legally marry before returning to England.”
This was slightly better than what I had expected. He still wanted to marry me, just not yet. I stopped struggling and leaned against his chest. “Is it that other woman? The one your father wants you to marry?”
“It’s partly due to her. As a gentleman, I must ensure the contract is void before entering into another one.”
“But your name was forged,” I countered.
“The young lady involved has no knowledge of my father’s deceit. I could not treat her so cruelly by marrying someone else while she still believes us attached.”
To be fair, he had a decent point, not that I cared very much about this other woman. “Why else?” I demanded.
“It’s a complicated matter,” he sighed. Burying his face in my hair, he took a deep breath. “I love the way you smell. Sweet like violets, with something wild mixed in.”
“Are you changing the subject?” I tried to pull away again, but he refused to let go.
“If I were trying to change the subject, I would do this.” He turned my face to his and softly kissed me.
Tremors raced through my veins. “You are definitely changing the subject then,” I murmured when he finally pulled back. “Why won’t you tell me?”
“Because what we have is perfect. I don’t want to spoil it.”
“Good heavens, Henry! I told you that I was descended from a goddess, and you didn’t run away. Why do you think I would be any different?”
“I don’t, it’s just that some things are more difficult to overcome.”
I gaped at him. “I’m not even entirely human! How much more serious can your secret be?”
He smiled at me, unable to deny my reasoning. “You’re right. When you come back from the Otherworld, I’ll tell you.”
“Why not tell me now?” I asked, snuggling closer into him. “I’m in no hurry to go.”
“Because this road is about to get very crowded with people on their way home from meeting. Someplace more private would be nice if I’m to divulge my darkest secrets. Once you return, we’ll ask Karta to pack us a picnic. Then you can sit on my lap for as long as you like, and I’ll tell you everything.”
“You’re just trying to buy more time,” I accused even though the sound of carriage wheels could be heard behind us.
“Maybe, but you’re about to be discovered by your neighbors in a rather compromising position.”
“Have it your way.” I scooted back over to my own seat.
“I usually do,” he said smugly. Flipping the reins, he set the shay back into motion.
At the carriage house, I grabbed from under my seat the basket that had been packed earlier with dried herbs, a flint, and my sheath. Henry helped me down and together we walked toward the woods. I still wasn’t exactly sure how I felt about having him stand sentry, but he would have it no other way while the murderer remained at large.
When we reached the altar, he untied my laces and then turned his back while I changed. Dressed in my sheath, I knelt down to light the herbs. As the fragrant smoke filled my nose, I began to recite the Gaelic words, all the while cognizant of Henry standing only a few feet away, watching me.
Normally I would have lingered in the garden, absorbing its vitality. Anxious to get back to Henry, I only stayed long enough to drink from the spring before hurrying back into the mortal world. My body felt warm with Brigid’s power, fully rejuvenated. I opened my eyes and found Henry in the same place, his gaze steadfast on my face.
Seeing I had returned, he walked over to help me up. With his free hand, he smoothed the hair back from my forehead. “I saw when your spirit came back into your body.”
It was an intense experience moving between the two worlds, but I had no idea the transition was visible. “How could you tell?”
“The coloring in your face changed. Once you finished chanting, you turned very pale and became still as a statue. When you returned, your cheeks became flushed as though you had just come out of the sun.” He pulled me to him and kissed me. “And you feel different, like there is power all over your skin. I can almost taste it.”
“It will soon subside.”
“That’s too bad,” he said, his voice growing noticeably deeper. “I like how it feels.”
Warm tension began to spread through my abdomen. “We need to be careful,” I warned, feeling somewhat breathless. “Brigid is also a goddess of fertility. My ability to withstand your charm is significantly diminished when I’ve just returned from the Otherworld.”
“My charm?” he laughed softly. “By chance are you referring to my intense desire to bed you?”
“Yes,” I said, smiling up at him. “I was just trying to be more subtle.”
“There’s nothing subtle about how much I want you.” His arms shook slightly as he fought to maintain control. Drawing in a long deep breath, he released it slowly, and let me go. “That sheath leaves very little to the imagination in the daylight. You should change before my charm gets the best of both of us.”
It took every ounce of restraint to walk away. Ducking behind the nearest tree, I dressed quickly before either of us had a chance to reconsider, even manag
ing the ties by myself. Once I finished, we started along the path toward home. Returned from the Otherworld, I was anxious to learn the other reason why we couldn’t marry yet.
“I’m famished,” Henry said as we arrived at the front door. “I’ll speak to Karta directly about our picnic. Do you have any preferences?”
I took off my straw hat and tossed it on a side table. “Roasted chicken, if there’s any left over, and pickled beet.”
Mary bustled into the foyer to meet us. “There’s a gentleman waiting, ma’am,” she said nervously. “He’s asking to speak with Lord Fitzalan. I’ve told him there’s no one here by that name, but he insisted on staying until ye returned.”
“Where is he?” Henry asked, his voice suddenly tense.
“In the drawing room, sir.”
We hadn’t gone a single step before a young man hurried toward Henry. “My Lord!” Thank God I’ve finally found you! All this time I feared you were dead.”
“James!” Henry said, excitement lighting his face. “How did you know where to find me?”
“One of your cousin’s accomplices. Two weeks after you left he had a change of heart and confessed everything. An arrest warrant was issued, but word reached him and he fled across the channel into France.”
Henry put a hand on James’ shoulder and leaned forward to whisper in his ear. James nodded slowly and looked at me.
“Selah,” Henry said, turning to me. “This is my dear friend, Mr. James Roth. He’s just arrived from England.”
“Pleased to meet you, sir,” I said with a small curtsy.
“And you, ma’am,” James said, bowing politely.
“Mary, will you please show Mr. Roth upstairs to a room,” Henry asked. “He’ll be staying at Brighmor awhile.”
“Yes, sir,” Mary said and started for the stairs.
James shot Henry a quizzical look. “But, sir,” he protested. “I promised your father we would sail immediately for England.”
