“What is it?” I feel worry cloaking my voice already. I don’t think I want to know what it is, but I’m trying this thing where I don’t avoid anything that might be difficult, anything I think is too hard. I don’t want Mia thinking of me as someone who runs from everything. I don’t know what I want to be, but that isn’t it.
“The probate is up today. Everyone is coming into the office to sign with the attorney present. Isaac already faxed his part over. If we don’t sign today, then the shares Dad left to us go up to the board to split evenly and then decide on who has the operating share. Currently, it’s me, but signing the will makes it official, you know? Anyway, you have to get up here, and you have to sign it because the rest of us don’t even know why you haven’t yet. Either that or tell us whatever it is that has you playing house and avoiding us.” His long-winded speech almost goes in one ear and out the other, but I do hear him.
I sigh and groan like I’ve been told to do something I don’t want to do because I have to. I can’t possibly imagine what my brothers will say. What they’ll do. But it’s… it’s time to face it.
“Will Mom be there?” I ask. I hope she may be able to buffer everything. She is the only one who can get all nine of us to be calm even when shit gets crazy.
“Yeah, she will. She begged me to get you to come and sign the will. I don’t know if she knows why you left, but she doesn’t seem to care either. You’re the only one being… weird,” he scoffs.
I nod to myself, not surprised that Mom hasn’t told them. She wants me to be there and tell everyone with her.
“Whatever. I can drive up there, but it will take me until this evening.”
“I’ve got a chopper landing in thirty minutes at the private airport.”
I roll my eyes. Of course, he does. He easily assumed the role of rich CEO after Dad died, even before.
“Okay. I guess I’ll see you soon then.”
“Yeah. And I’m glad you’re coming. We can finally put all this shit behind us.”
I tense at the thought of baring everything and facing this issue. But I’m ready to do it.
“Yeah. Me, too.”
I get off the chopper and go right to the car waiting for me inside the carrier. I’ve been in it before when Dad would take us up in the chopper sometimes or the family was flying out privately for a vacation. He never did stuff like that for every vacation, but every once in a while, he did pull out all the stops for us. Dad taught me that working hard doesn’t always mean you can spend hard and squander it. Just that sometimes, you’re allowed to clap for yourself and celebrate with the people you love.
Being here makes me miss him a hell of a lot more. Is he really gone? I have to ask myself as the driver takes me through the familiar city, and I drift back to months ago when I was here. My office building was close by his, and we’d have lunch together sometimes, just us and my other brothers who work for him. Those kinds of things… I miss that. It makes me think about how my brothers would react to finding out about Deric.
He hadn’t called me since that day, and I was glad for it. At the same time, I expected him to. It all made me think that I got my aversion to dealing with shit from him. So, I guess he really is my dad.
The ever-familiar gray glass, modern high-rise building appears on my right, and I don’t wait for the driver to get out before I do. I know my way up to the conference room, and the stares I get from everyone remind me how of long I’ve been gone—that I have been gone at all. I know what it must seem like disappearing so soon after my dad’s death. Everyone knows who I am, every employee has seen the family together a hundred times, and they know me by name as they awkwardly try to say hello and not ask me where the hell I’ve been.
“Alec, hi. It’s been so long,” Julia, the loyal secretary of almost ten years, greets me as soon as I cross the entryway from the elevator to the top floor where the executive offices and boardrooms are.
“Hey, Julia.”
She smiles softly, her blouse and skirt ensemble is the same as before as is the bun in the back of her head. I know the look in her eye because I saw it from everyone at Dad’s funeral.
“They’re all in the first conference room.”
“Thanks. Nice to see you again.”
She reciprocates, and I head for the room some ways off from the front. The glass rooms and open space are lit up by the dimming sun, signature for almost four in the afternoon. This day started so differently, and here I am now back in a place I didn’t imagine myself coming back to for a while or until I could muster up the courage.
When my phone rings, and I see that it’s Mia, it makes me stop in my tracks. My thumb hovers over the answer button, but I don’t press it. Usually, I’m home in an hour, and she probably got the note I left her by now. Dammit, she’s probably calling to ask what she should wear for the dinner I told her I was taking her to. I don’t know how things will be by the end of the day. I don’t know if I can take telling her all of this right now. Inviting her into my chaos. I let it ring because I don’t know how to explain this to her, it kills me and I don’t start walking again until it stops ringing.
I get more stares, more uneasy hellos, and more wondering what the hell I’m doing here. But when I see a member of the board that I only recognize by his face, I see that he knows, and it flashes in his eyes that he realizes there may not be a decision as to who gets shares of the company. I quickly move past and stare at the imposing double doors—wide glass, huge silver handles—but I can’t see inside because of the texture of the glass, but I don’t need to. I know my brothers’ frames when I see them, I know Fletcher’s laugh and Jeffrey’s obnoxious snort.
And I manage a smile at seeing my brothers before telling them the truth takes it away. I swing open the door and walk into something I can’t really place.
“Well, well. Electric boy didn’t get electrocuted after all.” Evan is the first to annoy me. I’m not surprised, but I do smile and return his hug, and he straightens out his obnoxious blue suit after I do.
And the same goes for everyone else. Fletcher is always dressed in sweats and today is no different. He hugs me way too tight like I’m one of his football buddies, but I don’t mind—not today. Carson, I guess since he’s younger than me, the hug lasts longer, and I’m surprised to see him dressed in a suit, modestly black and boring. Jeffrey is in his gray scrubs. I’ve only seen him in them once, but he looks good. Dylan is casual like me, and Grayson says something from the television his video call is cast on. He’s in battle dress uniform, so I guess he couldn’t get leave. Holden is last, and he makes a show of ruffling my hair and kissing my cheek to make everyone laugh despite the obvious tension in the room.
“You didn’t bring the girl?” Holden whispers, and I warn him with my eyes. He nods, getting the message and sits back behind the wide, glass desk. I see Mom finally. She rises from the couch and smiles at me.
I get warm and fuzzy, and it makes me feel like a ‘momma’s boy’ for the first time, especially when she hugs me. She is much shorter, and I bend to make it easier for her to kiss me all over my cheek.
“I missed you.” She holds my face in her hands as she pulls away.
“Me, too.” I smile down at her. It pains me to see her look so sad, and some of the light in her blue eyes is gone. Only one of us got her eyes, and that’s Holden.
She tugs her sweater around her shoulders and sits back down in the single chair. The office has two large couches that barely fit all of us, but we move to the conference table, and Holden takes a seat at the end. Troy Marx, the lawyer, is here. I guess he has been sitting at the head of the table for a while.
“Before we get this signed, does anyone have any questions?”
I clear my throat and prepare to say something before a loud bang erupts. We all look to Grayson who laughs it off.
“Training. Sorry. Continue.”
Maybe it makes me a little more at ease, but not by much. I wring my hands together over the gl
ass desk starting to get the cold sweats.
“What happens if we don’t all sign?”
“Alec—”
I hold up my hand to stop Holden from changing my mind. Troy scratches his beard and clears his throat.
“Then the document goes into hiatus. And one of the operating clauses put in place by your father was that you all agree. And you all sign. Or matters of the company go to the board, and personal assets are repossessed.”
“Why can’t they all go to our mom?” I ask.
He sighs and does some flipping through the substantial stack of papers I know by now as the will.
“I give all my tangible personal property and all policies and proceeds of insurance covering such property to the estate of the Wilde family. I give that property to those of my children who survive me, in equal shares, to be divided among them by my executors in their absolute discretion after consultation with my children. If there is not unanimous agreement, my executors may pay out of my estate the expenses of delivering tangible personal property to beneficiaries.” Troy reads like a robot, but I don’t know what that means.
“Look, pass me the paper, I’ve got a hip replacement in an hour,” Jeffrey blurts out, and his part gets passed to him as I shift uncomfortably in my seat. Mom looks at me from across the room and stands at Holden’s side when he signs, and then it gets to me.
But I can’t sign it. None of this is really mine. They wouldn’t want me to have any of it once they figure that out.
“Dude, what’s your deal?” Carson says, his happy-go-lucky tone just giving me more anxiety.
“Look I… I can’t sign this. I came here to tell you all in person.” I swallow back the thick lump in my throat that only blocks half my air supply.
Mom’s soothing voice comes next. “Troy, will you give us a minute?”
He makes a face but stands and smiles at her before leaving the room. Mom comes to stand next to me, and when she does, I feel a little better but not completely in control.
“I left after Dad died because I had some stuff to figure out.” I stare past everyone as I look out the window to all the buildings and normal people outside. “And I did. Mostly. I didn’t want to involve you guys until I knew what to do about it. Turns out, I won’t really know until I tell you the truth.”
Mom squeezes my shoulder. She wants to tell them. I hold her hand over my shoulder, and she squeezes tightly, maybe a little too tight, but I’m not about to tell her.
“Alec isn’t your father’s biological son.”
Fletcher starts laughing, and I hear the gears ticking in all their heads.
“Huh?” Jeffrey says first.
“Wow, MD doesn’t get something?” Carson snipes.
“Well, excuse me if I find it hard to believe.”
“Hard to believe?” Grayson adds virtually.
“Doesn’t make much sense to me either,” Evan says.
“You all are stupid,” Holden says.
“Boys—” Mom starts again. “Don’t fight. It’s… we weren’t sure how to tell you.”
“What, that you cheated on Dad?” Dylan looks so hurt that I have to look away. Last time he looked like that our dog, Spinner, had just died.
“So, you aren’t a boring Mom after all. Maybe we’ll finally make it on Oprah.” Carson stands and paces the length of the desk.
“They don’t shoot that show anymore, Car,” Fletcher mutters before he rubs his face in his hands. They all do their own little ‘I’m frustrated’ things and come back.
“I’m sorry. I know I made a mistake, but it doesn’t… it shouldn’t change anything. You’re brothers, and we’re family.”
“Is Isaac not Dad’s either? Is that why he ran away?” Dylan glares at Mom, and she grips my hand tighter.
“No, that’s not why he left. None of us know why he left, but I don’t want Alec leaving again either.”
“Why did you leave?” Grayson asks, and they all sort of nod in agreement.
“Because I didn’t know how to tell you. And… because Dad had told me like a week before he died. Like the… like I caused his death in some way.” I wince and clench my jaw.
Fletcher laughs, not really appropriate, but he never is. “Alec, you’ve always been so fucking moody. That isn’t true. Dad had high cholesterol.”
“He never did what I told him, medically,” Jeffrey adds.
“And he was just always super old. Remember? What, fifteen years older than Mom when they met?” Carson adds. I nod, remembering Mom was way younger than Dad when they met.
“He died at seventy-one, that’s pretty average, bro,” Holden says.
I sigh, feeling a small weight off my chest from telling them. Finally. But the big dam- opening feeling isn’t here yet.
“Dad’s death wasn’t your fault. And you should have told us because you didn’t need to leave,” Holden says.
“Yeah…” Grayson says, “… we all don’t really care about what Mom did. Not really. Maybe she should have told us, but…” He has always been one for innate sarcasm.
“I’m sorry I hadn’t. I just… it didn’t seem to matter at the time because you’re still brothers. And nothing changed.”
“Who was the guy? Do we know him?” Holden asks. I thought he knew everything, but I guess not.
“No. Just… he’s nothing,” Mom says.
Thinking of Deric makes my blood boil.
“You see why I couldn’t sign before. All this… doesn’t really belong to me. It’s yours to decide with.” I push the papers away. Mom rubs my shoulders and sits back down. She looks like she just added ten years to her frame, but her eyes look softer again, and I see how this secret has affected her.
“No, it was Dad’s. And if he cared, he’d have written it into the damn will, too. But he didn’t. Besides, we don’t need Tom, Dick, and Harry deciding what happens with our shares of our Dad’s company.” Fletcher rolls his eyes and sits back cracking his knuckles.
“Yeah. You almost made us drive up the company’s legal fees by thirty percent. You’re signing the fucking will because we don’t care,” Evan says. I smile softly at him, and he nods.
“Agreed.” Dylan stands. “I don’t know about Mom and whoever your real dad is, but that’s got nothing to do with us. We grew up together.” He grabs a pen and comes over to me, and as he does, Carson says something.
“We painted the town red and all that shit. Everyone knew who the Wilde brothers are because we always stuck together.”
“And we always will. Isaac will come around one day, and you’ll hopefully realize that we always have each other’s backs,” Jeffrey adds.
I scratch my head leaning back to take in their words. I have to effectively cool myself down. I’ve never been this nervous around my own family, but their response is making my cold sweats go away.
“It’s cool you’re our half-brother. I’ve got more fuel to tease you with,” Evan says, and he walks over to sign his line of the will and noogies me after he does. I frown but not before Fletcher signs his part of the will.
They pass it around until it gets back to me.
“You all really agree to this?” I ask.
“Yeah, bro. You’ve got little say in the operating share anyway.” Holden laughs, and it makes me crack a small smile.
So, I hover over the short black line surrounded by my brothers and mom for what feels like the first time in forever. Family is too important to give up and not to fight for. And to know they feel the same way, to know they still accept me is enough to make my head spin and land back on the way things used to be.
So, I sign. Carson makes a show of clapping, and Grayson says something about flight training before ending the call.
“This is great. Even though I definitely won’t make that hip replacement now,” Jeffrey huffs and comes over to clap my shoulder. I shake his hand, and he grins at me. The two of us always looked a lot alike. Mom’s genes must be the strongest in all of us.
“
You can delegate,” Fletcher says. “I’ve got a game this weekend, so I’ll just stick around.”
“Are you going back to wherever it is you’re at?” Carson asks.
Holden grins, and I glare at him, but he does it anyway. “Alec has to get back to his girlfriend.”
And all of my brothers say at the same time, “You have a girlfriend?”
26
Mia
Thirty missed calls borders on insane.
So, I stop after the end of the second day.
I spent the last forty-eight hours obsessing over Alec and why he left so suddenly. His car is gone, but his stuff is still here. He doesn’t answer the phone, and I don’t know if I should call the cops or not. He could be missing, but I don’t want to ruffle things up. The cops already don’t like me for lying about an intruder.
I want to go back to that first day I met him and insist that he never move in.
I fell in love with him. Completely, deeply, and now—painfully. He doesn’t care about me, and his chances are up because he obviously doesn’t respect me.
If he did, he would at least answer the fucking phone and not let me look so stupid—stupid for loving him, for giving him a chance, for anything.
It makes it that much easier to move on, though, even though my heart is… is shredded. The new lab in New York offered me a principal research management position, and I accepted it this morning, the third day I haven’t heard or seen from Alec. I warned him a long time ago, but I guess I didn’t make it clear enough that it’s not okay for him to treat me like this.
Like I’m nothing. Smaller than a seed.
“You’re really leaving?” Haley is with me in the condo. I am packing up the kitchen first since it would only leave my bedroom, and I couldn’t go in there without thinking of Alec and permanently smelling him on my sheets, even after washing them.
The leasing agent was nice enough to help me legally absolve my lease. I didn’t have to pay the fees, and I could get that clean break and just move out.
Wilde About Alec Page 16
