Tessa wished she could make certain her aunt had tea like this every day. But no matter how much she’d plotted and worked, their income hadn’t changed overmuch. Some days it seemed rather hopeless. After all, it was the girls who mattered. Not what they ate with their tea.
“What do you ladies have planned for this evening?” Marcus asked.
Tessa looked at him in surprise. “We don’t have plans.” Did that mean he would be going out? Disappointment filled her at the thought.
“I thought we might venture to a play, if both of you are up to it.”
Aunt Betty’s eyes lit up at the suggestion then all too quickly dimmed. “We don’t have the appropriate attire for such an outing.”
Marcus smiled. “This is nothing fancy. Only a performance at a small theater not far from here. It is my understanding that all sorts of people attend, and therefore no specific dress is required.”
Aunt Betty turned to Tessa. “What do you think, dear?”
“It sounds lovely.” After seeing how excited her aunt was at the prospect, Tessa would’ve agreed to nearly anything.
“We’ll return here for a late supper.”
Aunt Betty clapped her hands together. “How exciting. I believe I’ll soon retire to my room to rest.”
They finished tea and as promised, Aunt Betty left them in the drawing room. Tessa couldn’t help but frown as her aunt closed the door.
“What is it?” Marcus asked.
“She’s been resting so much. I must say, it concerns me. Perhaps she’s been working too hard of late.”
“Or perhaps she’s simply giving us some privacy.” Marcus shifted to sit beside her.
Tessa had to chuckle. Why hadn’t she thought of that? “I suppose you’re right. How did your meeting with your man of business proceed?”
Marcus scowled. “Less than satisfactory. The man’s viewpoint doesn’t align with mine. I have no choice but to employ someone else for the position. He believes that increasing workers’ wages will only lead them to want more.”
“I hardly think that providing them with a reasonable living makes them greedy,” Tessa protested.
“Exactly. I brought up the matter casually, to try to gain a sense of his opinion. Most of what he said angered me. How can he walk through the streets and not see how many need help?”
“Perhaps he doesn’t venture to those areas.”
“I can’t believe that. He insists the recent articles by Josephine Butler and others are merely ploys to sell more papers.”
Tessa gasped in outrage. “How can he believe that? They clearly state the facts.”
Marcus took his hand in hers. “That is one of the many things I like about you, Tessa. Your concern for others is admirable.”
The sincere way he spoke touched her. “Someone has to take action on these issues, but no one will if they aren’t informed.”
“I agree. Once the men involved in this situation with my ship are caught, I intend to see what else can be done. Where there’s one group, there must be more.”
“I’m afraid you’re right.” She ran a finger along the back of his hand. “Your concern is admirable as well.” She smiled up at him, pleased they had this in common. It helped to make amends for all the other differences separating them.
Heat lit his eyes, and he leaned forward until he was mere inches from her face. “Shall I tell you what else I admire about you?”
His suggestive tone made her smile all the more. She glanced over her shoulder, seeing the door remained firmly shut, and turned back to him. “Such as?”
“Such as the small gold flecks in your beautiful green eyes.” He leaned forward to kiss the corner of her eye. “Such as the pert tip to your nose.” He kissed it. “The curve of your upper lip.” Again, he kissed her, longer this time. “The lovely line of your jaw.” His lips moved along her jaw, causing her heart to pound.
“You had better stop there,” she said breathlessly.
“I would rather continue. There’s so much more.”
She couldn’t help but laugh. “You, my lord, are incorrigible.”
“So I’ve been told.” He lifted her hand to his lips. “Perhaps you might need a rest before the evening as well?”
“I’m not tired,” she protested. She had no desire to remain in her room now that he had finally come home.
“What if I joined you for that rest?” he suggested, lifting a brow.
“Oh.” She would never have guessed that such a thing was possible. “As long as I’m with you.” She rested her hand along his cheek, still amazed that she might take such liberties with him. And that he welcomed them.
“That is exactly how I feel.” His lips took hers, stirring the passion that always seemed to smolder just below the surface.
But now there was an extra intensity, an extra depth to what she felt. She feared this truly was love.
She drew back, startled at the thought.
“What is it?” he asked.
“Nothing. I just—” She bit her lip. No. Now was not the time to make such a proclamation. She had yet to understand exactly what this relationship with him was. It was still so new. For now, she needed to simply enjoy it. “I truly like spending time with you, Marcus.”
His eyes crinkled at the corners with his smile. “As do I. I would enjoy it even more with the promise of privacy. Why don’t you precede me. I’ll come to you shortly.”
Her heartbeat sped at the idea of him joining her in her room. “Very well.” She rose, well aware her cheeks heated with her thoughts.
He stood as well and took her hand, kissing the back of it. “I will see you soon.”
It was all she could do to walk sedately out of the room and up the stairs when she wanted to hurry so she might have more time with Marcus.
~*~
Marcus poured Tessa and himself a drink late that night, pleased with the events of the day. Their afternoon had been filled with laughter and tenderness and passion. The evening could not have gone better. Mrs. Davison and Tessa had thoroughly enjoyed the theater, as had he. They shared a delightful supper together with clever conversation. And Mrs. Davison had just said her goodnights.
Now he and Tessa were alone again. What more could a man ask for?
Granted, he had yet to resolve the problem with the girls and his ship, but he had made progress in that direction this day as well. With luck, the morrow would bring further progress. He had to hope the police were making inroads as well with Culbert in their custody.
But tonight was his and Tessa’s.
He’d already placed the emerald necklace he’d purchased for her in his pocket. Now he need only find the right moment and the right words to present it to her. Yet he hesitated, feeling like a selfish bastard for asking her.
“Here you are,” he said as he handed her the glass and took a seat beside her.
“Thank you.” She took a sip and set it down. “I can’t thank you enough for such a lovely evening. Aunt Betty truly enjoyed herself. I haven’t seen her that happy for a long while.”
“I’m glad.” Nerves shadowed him, causing him to have qualms about his request.
“What is it?” she asked.
It amazed him how attuned she was to his moods. That was one more thing he appreciated about her. He drew a deep breath. Now was his chance. Why was he dithering?
“Tessa?” He took her hand in his. “I think I’ve made it clear how much I appreciate your company. And I don’t want our association to end when I leave London.”
Her eyes went wide. “I enjoy spending time with you as well.”
He drew the small box from his pocket and handed it to her. “I would like you to have this, as a token of my appreciation.”
She frowned at the box but didn’t open it. “You don’t need to buy me gifts.”
“I wanted some way to show you how special you are to me.” He gestured to the box. “Please. I would like you to have this.”
She held his gaze for a
moment and almost reluctantly opened the lid. The emerald sparkled in the light, the diamonds shimmering around it. “It’s beautiful.”
There was a tightness in her voice he didn’t care for. Yet still he pressed forward. “As are you. I thought it would match your eyes.”
“I don’t think—”
“Wait.” He tried to think of how best to say this, but struggled to find the right words. “I want to see you again when this situation is over. To spend time with you when I come to London.”
She watched him warily. Where he’d hoped she’d be excited, she seemed anything but.
“I would like to buy you and your aunt a house in which to live. One where you would be safe and live comfortably. You could pass the shop onto one of the older girls who might continue what you started. Your expenses would be paid for along with a monthly allowance that—”
Tessa snapped the lid closed. “You want me to be your mistress?”
He nodded, trying to understand her reaction.
“How often would you visit? From what I understand, you rarely come to London.” The coolness in her expression did not bode well.
“I would obviously come more often now that I have you here.”
She nodded, but it wasn’t in agreement. “And in exchange for this...life of luxury you’re offering, I would need to do what, exactly?”
“Nothing. I—I would merely like to spend time with you when I come to London.”
“So a week or two a year? Or would it be more often?”
He frowned, feeling as though she was setting some sort of trap for him, but for the life of him, he couldn’t see it. “I would prefer it to be more often. Though Northumberland is some distance away, of course.”
“No, thank you.” She handed the box back to him and rose.
He could only stare at her, perplexed as to why she would refuse. “I thought we were of the same mind.”
“As did I. But apparently I was wrong.” She blinked rapidly as tears filled her eyes. “Surely you can understand why I am not willing to put my welfare in the hands of a man.”
“You would remain independent.”
“Would I? It sounds as if I’d be required to render certain services at your convenience. Am I wrong?”
Marcus rose as anger filled him. “I thought you like to spend time in my company as much as I do yours. Obviously I was wrong.”
“It’s not your company I object to. It’s this...arrangement that you’re proposing.”
“Because I want to make your life easier?”
Tessa shook her head. “I don’t want an easier life. I want a better life.”
“I don’t understand the difference.” To him, it sounded the same. “Wouldn’t a life with me be better than what you have now?”
“Not when I am simply another worker in your employ.” She swallowed hard. “I think it would be best if my aunt and I returned to our shop in the morning. Good night.” She hurried out of the room, closing the door quietly behind her.
Marcus stared at the door as he tried to understand what went wrong. He closed his eyes, wondering if this was for the best.
CHAPTER NINE
Tessa rose early the next morning and gathered her meager possessions after having spent a sleepless night staring at the ceiling. Her heart ached so much that several times, she’d rubbed her chest to ease the pain. But it hadn’t helped.
How could he have offered for her to be his mistress? Did he think her no better than that? Yet Marcus was not the only one with whom she was angry. She was equally at fault, for she’d allowed herself to hope they might have a future together.
Apparently Marcus’s vision of what that future looked like differed greatly from hers. She’d overestimated his feelings for her. The picture sitting on his desk in the library came to mind. Was that woman the reason he wouldn’t offer marriage? Or was it because of her simple background? No doubt there were expectations of who a man like him should marry. In no respect did she fit that ideal.
She’d shed only a few tears during the night, mostly because her emotions felt frozen after their conversation. How could things have gone from so wonderful to so terrible in a few short minutes?
With a sigh, she sat in the chair near the window to watch dawn’s light spread across the sky. She couldn’t possibly wake her aunt at this hour and request they leave. Perhaps the time waiting would present her with the answer as to how she should proceed with Marcus.
A sob caught in her throat. There were so many things she liked about him. Or rather, loved about him. She might as well be honest with herself even though she hadn’t been brave enough to tell him. She doubted that would’ve changed anything. How she wished things had gone differently. That he’d offered her his heart rather than security. If someone had told her she’d choose love over security two weeks past, she would’ve laughed.
But she couldn’t change how he felt about her. In truth, he’d given her some of the best days of her life, and for that, she was grateful. She’d do her best to remember that in the painful days ahead. And she knew they would be painful. Already her heart ached, making her want to return to the bed so she wouldn’t have to put on a brave front and pretend all was well when her world had fallen apart.
Staying here, in his home, was not an option. She couldn’t bear it and hoped Aunt Betty would understand. Surely any danger had passed by now. They would have to consider speaking plainly with their apprentices as to what risk they all faced. They’d need to keep watch for anyone approaching the girls. And they’d have to hope that Culbert couldn’t reach them from prison. Marcus had said he’d have accomplices as he couldn’t have managed all this on his own. That idea frightened her, but she couldn’t live in fear. She refused to allow men like Culbert to have power over her.
Her stomach had been tied in knots when she and Aunt Betty had gone downstairs for breakfast, but Marcus was not there. After breakfast, she managed to convince Aunt Betty the time had come to return home without presenting much of an explanation. Samuel had offered to see them safely home. Still Marcus was nowhere to be seen. Nor did she ask where he was. Perhaps it was better this way.
She glanced at the bedroom in which she’d stayed one last time, imprinting the image before shutting the door firmly behind her. Surely the memories of her brief stay here would give her comfort in the months to come although they would be bittersweet.
The carriage ride home passed in silence. Aunt Betty’s watchful gaze weighed on her, but she feigned interest in the scenery, not yet ready for the questions her aunt would soon ask.
Upon arrival, Samuel opened the carriage door and she stepped out, staring at their shop with fresh eyes. The place was neat and tidy and perfectly appropriate for the quality of customers they served. But it lacked anything to set it apart from the other shops along the street.
Was that the case with her as well? Nothing about her was special enough to hold Marcus’s affection? Was that why he’d only offered to share a small piece of his life with her? Doubt filled her, something she’d worked hard to overcome since that terrible day when she’d nearly been sold to pay for her father’s debts. Doubt that she deserved anything other than what fate had offered her thus far. Doubt that she was worth anything more than a few pounds and a shilling or two.
“Posture,” Aunt Betty corrected as she touched Tessa’s back, making Tessa smile.
How many times through the years had she told Tessa that? She’d learned much from her aunt about life. Tessa straightened immediately and shook off her dismal thoughts.
“Thank you, Samuel.” Tessa smiled at the burly, kind footman. She would miss him too.
“Will I be seeing you again soon, miss?” he asked.
“I don’t believe so.” She had to clear her throat to keep her sadness at bay.
The footman frowned. “But his lordship said we would be keeping an eye on things for you.”
“That’s no longer necessary.”
The man looked anyth
ing but pleased. “I’ll carry your bags upstairs.”
She unlocked the shop and Samuel held open the door for them. He followed them up the stairs to their apartment.
“It’s always good to be home, isn’t it?” she asked Aunt Betty as she moved to look out the window. When her aunt didn’t respond, she didn’t have the energy to inquire as to why.
Instead, she turned to Samuel and couldn’t resist giving his arm a squeeze. “Take care of yourself, Samuel. And of his lordship.”
“If you’ll do the same, miss. You as well, Mrs. Davison.”
“Thank you, Samuel,” her aunt said with a smile.
Tessa followed him downstairs to lock the shop door behind him.
“Shall I put on some tea?” Aunt Betty asked as Tessa entered the apartment again. “Perhaps then you can tell me what has happened.”
“What do you mean?” Tessa asked.
“I might be old, but I’m not dim.”
“I don’t think you’re either of those.”
“Anyone with eyes could see the attraction between you and his lordship. What happened?”
Tears threatened as Tessa sat at their tiny table. “He asked me to become his mistress.”
“Oh, dear.” Her aunt sat in the opposite chair and took Tessa’s hand in hers. “And you refused?”
“What choice did I have? I couldn’t live like that. Only able to see him once every few months until he finally marries and forgets about me. It would break my heart.”
“Why?” The question surprised her.
“Because I love him. It might be greedy of me, but I want more. Being his mistress is not enough. While I know I am merely a seamstress and he is an earl—”
“No one would hold that against you. I certainly don’t think his lordship does.”
“Then what is it? Do I lack something?” Tears tracked down her cheeks, and she wiped them away impatiently. “I thought we were happy together.”
Aunt Betty filled their cups and sat beside Tessa again before responding. “I had a long visit with the housekeeper. Did his lordship tell you he used to be married?”
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