by Pam Godwin
“Come,” she breathed against his lips. “Come with me.”
He rotated his hips, rubbed her clit, and ate at her mouth until they stiffened, gasped, and fell together.
When they caught their breaths, he leaned in and nibbled on her earlobe. “Morning.”
An hour later, they realized it was, in fact, afternoon. They stood at the keypad, showered, dressed, and stared at the digital 3:18 PM on her phone. Despite their shared smiles, unease buzzed between them. Their bodies needed to be fed, so they were forced to leave the room.
She stuffed her phone in the back pocket of her jeans and clutched the door handle. “Let me go down first. I’ll make sure he’s not back and return to get you.”
He reached around her and punched in the code. “We went through this last night. You’re not going down there, or anywhere, without me.”
The door clicked open. She flashed him her most threatening glare. “Then stay behind me and out of sight.”
Through the vacant outer chamber, another keypad, and down the dark stairway they went. Silence greeted her at the bottom. Daylight leaked in through the kitchen window, spreading a sparse glow into the hallway.
She reached back, placed a hand on his chest, and gave him a silent command with her eyes. Stay.
In the kitchen, dirty soup bowls filled the sink. The refrigerator hummed. Outside the window, the trees rustled beneath the afternoon sun. With a stuttering heart beat, she opened the door to the garage. The van sat alone. She held her breath as she checked the driveway and the front curb through the windows. Van’s Kia wasn’t there, and he had no reason to hide his car from her. Her edginess loosened, but remnants of uncertainty remained.
She returned to the stairway and found Josh gripping the door frame, his impatient eyes blazing from within the shadows. She touched his abs and met a wall of rock-hard tension. “He’s not here. Follow me.”
Leading him down the hallway, a familiar dread gripped her gut. She needed to check Van’s room of horrors, if only to ease some of her lingering anxiety about Van being there. But she didn’t want to go in that room alone.
Hand on the knob, she inhaled deeply. “This is his room. As you know, he is…” How did one sum up morally, mentally, aesthetically, and theoretically damaged? “Fucked up.”
Impatience vibrated from him. “Open the door, Liv.”
She did. And gasped. Stumbling through the room, she spun in a circle, hand over her mouth. An empty mattress. An empty gun cabinet. The drawers hung from the dresser. Empty. The closet door stood open. Empty. No mannequins. No clothes. There was nothing but worn carpet and the musty reek of vacancy. “He’s gone.”
Huge fucking alarm bells blared in her head. Her heart raced and senses heightened. Why would he leave? Was it fear? Was all hell about to break loose?
Josh clasped her fingers, his forehead furrowed in thought. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
She rubbed her head. “Van’s a sadistic dick, but he wouldn’t have left me if my life was in danger. Something prompted him to leave in a hurry, though.”
Shards of glass littered the carpet in front of the gun cabinet. The door was a toothy frame hanging on its hinge.
Her stomach turned. “That’s what he hit when I told him about Traquero.” Had he been angry for her? Or at her? It shouldn’t have mattered, but when it came to Van, her feelings gnarled and bled in complication. She thought back to the last conversation she had with him. “He said he was leaving in the morning to begin his scouting.”
“Only, he left before we got back.” Josh strode out of the room and into the spare bedroom.
A square of ratty green carpet buckled between the walls. The metal blinds on the single window hung lopsided and yellowed by age.
“This one has always been empty,” she said. A room reserved for her, one she’d refused to move into.
He turned and walked down the hall, his gait quickening as he approached the kitchen. “He was pissed about what happened with Traquero. He must’ve packed immediately and blew out of town.”
She ran to keep up with his longer strides. “Why? To kill my mom?” She flinched and clenched her fists against the stabbing reminder. “Or to protect himself from Mr. E?” But why would he need to do that? “Van’s a lot of things, but he’s not a coward.”
Josh veered into the kitchen and opened the fridge door, scanning its contents. Of course, the linebacker was focused on his stomach. Her thoughts were on a crash site, somewhere off the coast of the Keys, and the man who might’ve caused it.
He tossed deli meat and cheese on the counter. Then they sat through a nerve-stretching meal. She picked at her sandwich, her stomach souring with each bite. He barked at her to eat when she sat still too long, his anxiety feeding on hers. They finished in silence, staring at the door to the garage as if it would open any moment and let in all the answers.
Thirty minutes later, they tackled the filing cabinet in the hall closet, the only place in the house that could’ve held a clue to Mr. E’s identity. She’d dug through it countless times, but maybe she’d missed something amongst the bills, receipts for generic items purchased for the house, tax filings, and news articles.
He held up two hands full of paperwork. “Who is Liv Smith?”
“The fake identity Mr. E gave me.”
“Everything is in that name. The rental agreement for the house. Liv Smith.” He thumbed to the next one. “The titles to the vehicles. Liv Smith.” His face twisted beneath clenched eyebrows, his voice rising. “The friggin’ repair bill for the A/C unit. Liv Smith.”
She looked up from her drawer. “I see that.”
“You see that?” His cheeks burned red, and his eyes widened in a state of disbelief. He wiped his forehead with the back of his paper-filled hand. “Not a single document shows Van Quiso paying taxes, consuming groceries, or living here at all. Ever.”
Her hackles rose in defense. “He told me to sign stuff. It was legitimate stuff related to the house. I signed it with a fake name.” But she didn’t realize the name was on everything.
“What about the neighbors? Do they know him?”
“No. He comes and goes from the garage. Tinted windows. Just like Mr. E.” She picked the edge of the paper in her hand and said, dejectedly, “I cut the grass.”
He blew out a long exhale. “It’s like he doesn’t even exist.” He returned the papers to their hanging folders, none too gently. “What does it mean, Liv?”
It meant Van was smarter than her. “He can disappear.” And she couldn’t. Not if she wanted to keep Mattie safe.
“Why would he do that?” He slammed the drawer.
She lifted her chin and collided with the sharp green of his eyes. “Mr. E could be planning to shut this down and kill us. Or Van could’ve decided on a career change after my fuck up and bolted.” Without saying goodbye. Her heart squeezed. Stupid asshole heart.
Josh crouched beside her, shifted her hand from the thick file hanging in the drawer, and pulled it out. Her swallow clogged in her throat, along with her breath. How would he react to the news clippings about his disappearance?
Kneeling, he leafed through each one, his face paling, his brow furrowing. She’d skimmed through all of them. Seemed Van had added more in his paranoia about Josh’s notoriety. The file was filled with reports about the dead-end investigation, Baylor University’s on-going support, search parties, and walk-a-thon’s to raise money and awareness. Her heart twisted as she imagined all the pain and resentment barreling through him.
Scooting closer, she straddled one of his knees and wrapped her arms around his neck. He welcomed her with an embrace around her waist, holding her tight as he read.
When he finished the pile, he returned it to the drawer. “Where’s yours?” His voice was quiet and strained.
She reached in the back of the drawer and handed him the thin dossier. “My disappearance didn’t get the publicity yours did.” She offered a smile, but it quivered at the corners.
With a kiss on the crook of her mouth, he opened the file. They read the first article in silence.
Body of missing Texas girl found in Del Valle
Officials in Texas say that remains found in an abandoned house this weekend are those of a 17-year-old girl who has been missing fourteen months.
Austin police confirmed Monday that the remains were burned beyond recognition. Police said that autopsy results indicated they belonged to Liv Reed. A 9mm shell casing and two unfired .38 caliber bullets were discovered at the crime scene.
Reed’s mother, Jill, told KRPC-TV that roller blades were found in the house. Liv was wearing them when she disappeared from Fentress Airpark. Her class ring from Eastside Memorial High School was also recovered.
Austin Police Chief, Eli Eary, said it’s believed that Reed was shot and killed in the abandoned Del Valle house, and her body was burned to destroy any evidence.
Her eyes blurred, unable to read further. An old ache clawed through her throat. Regret for Mom having suffered through her death and the terrible frustration for not being able to prove she still lived. And searing the edges of that ache was a harrowing sadness for the nameless victim who died in her place.
He stuffed the documents in the drawer, closed it, and shifted her legs to wrap around his waist. His lips stroked across her brow, his hands rubbing over her back. He held her as if he’d never let go. She held him the same way, arms tightening, fingers curling into flesh and muscle.
“There are no articles on the other captives.” His tone was distant, somber.
A ragged inhale hitched through her. “There was no fanfare with their disappearances. Those who did miss them wouldn’t have involved the police. Kate’s brothers are criminals. Camila was a nobody-gopher for the cartel. The others came from crack houses or no homes at all.” She kissed his neck, inhaling his scent to chase away the toxicity of the conversation, and leaned back. “What now?”
He rose, lifting her with him and standing her on her feet. His jaw was hard, his eyes equally so. “Now, we wait for Mr. E to come looking for Van. Or for us. And when he does, we’ll be ready.”
Her pulse kicked up in approval. She wanted him to color his words and fill her mind with images. His images. “Ready to do what?”
“To trap him and beat the ever-loving crap out of him until he exposes Mattie’s location. Then we’ll slice his throat from ear to ear.”
Hope spun around her, curling her lips. It continued to lift her through the night as he led her upstairs, fucked her, cuddled her, fed her, and fucked her again.
They remained in the safety of the attic for two days, waiting for Mr. E’s text, closing the door only when they were sleeping, planning and…exploring. The latter was a new experience with whips and ropes and creative sexual positions. She only egressed for food, and her sentinel was always an arm-length behind her. They never emerged unarmed. He carried his mom’s .22 in his hand. She carried the LC9 in the waistband of her jeans, wedged in her butt crack.
On the third afternoon, she crept down the stairs and stopped. Her toes touched the bottom step, illuminated by a glow of light. Josh bumped into her back.
Her scalp tingled. The hairs on her arms stood on end. The kitchen light didn’t reach the staircase.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. She stretched her neck to peer into the sitting room. The lamp drenched the dated decor in a sickening yellow wash. She never turned that damned lamp on.
Her heart thundered in her ears. Mr. E hadn’t sent her a text. He always sent a text.
She spun and pressed a finger against his lips, shaking her head. His eyes narrowed, his body vibrated, and his stomach hardened to stone against her hand. She drew the 9mm from her waistband, flicked off the safety, and turned back. Choking on the thickening dread in her throat, she stepped into the hallway.
With a final glare at the silhouette of aggression vibrating in the staircase, she pointed a finger at him and strode toward the kitchen with the gun at her side.
She tripped in the doorway, her heart stumbling with her breath. A mannequin sat at the table, a naked woman with a head of hair, holding a doll. All the blood in her face dumped to her stomach.
She scanned the corners of the room for Van, unsure what to do with the gun. Raise it? Conceal it? Should she go for business as usual? She held it at her side. Where the fuck was he?
Her eardrums throbbed, straining for the sound of footsteps. She positioned herself so that she could see behind the bar, the entrance to the sitting room, and the mannequin at the table. “Van?” She shouted loud enough to dissuade Josh from charging after her.
But what if it wasn’t Van? What if this was one of Mr. E’s games?
A few feet away, the brown marbled eyes of the plastic woman stared back at her. A painted red line connected one glass eye to the pink hand-drawn mouth. Propped on the mannequin’s lap, the doll was the size of a small child, clothed in a red checkered dress.
Liv’s scar tingled in her cheek, her muscles stiffening to the point of pain. Staring at the morbid reproductions of her and Mattie, she tried to keep the contents of her stomach from painting the floor.
Gut-twisting curiosity shuffled her feet forward. With the gun rattling in her hand, she slid her other hand through the sparse hair on the heads. Each strand was different from the other but also…the same. They varied in hues of brown, intricately combed together and sewn into some kind of mesh cap glued to the scalps. The fibers between her fingers weren’t glossy like synthetic hair. They felt thinner, some damaged, realistic…familiar.
She jerked her hand back, her stomach bubbling toward her throat. Oh God. Her hair. Why? Jesus, fuck, what did it mean? She pressed a fist against her belly, backed up, and slammed into a hard body.
A hint of cologne touched her nose. The width of torso was too big. She turned, but Van’s arm around her chest caught her, pinning her back to his chest. His hand squeezed her breast, and she sucked in a breath. If she shot him, the contract on Mattie’s life would be activated.
She pressed the side of the gun against her thigh to thwart the shaking in her hand.
His lips touched her shoulder, her neck, the scar, creeping goosebumps over her skin. “I know you don’t approve of them, Liv. But I needed something to remember you by.”
CHAPTER 39
“What are you doing with the gun, Liv?”
Van’s voice was a low, strumming pulse in her ears. But there was an unraveling edge to it that scared the shit out of her. She drew in a breath and hoped to hell Josh stayed out of sight.
She trailed her fingertips over the back of his hand where he cupped her breast, to soothe him, to reestablish their fucked-up connection. “I thought you’d taken a permanent vacation.”
He sank his teeth into the side of her throat, not enough to break skin, but the sharp pinch stole her breath and raised her on tip-toes. One shift of his hand and he could break her neck.
She leaned into the bite. “Did you come back to kill me?”
His arm and teeth released her with a jerk. She fell forward, righted herself, and spun with the gun raised in both hands.
Three days of stubble darkened his jaw. His steely eyes were void of their usual glint, sagging beneath his hood. His smirk seemed forced as he slid a toothpick in his mouth. “You’re the one pointing a gun.”
She aimed at his chest. His jacket concealed the strength of his body, but she knew every muscle, every twitch, every scar. He’d taken her virginity, trained her as a sex slave, whipped her, fucked her, and loved her. She wasn’t any different from him. With one exception. She responded to the word No.
The light in the doorway behind him rippled. She didn’t shift her eyes, fearing it would give away Josh’s presence. To distract Van, she backed to the wall, until the length of the room separated them, and jerked her chin at the dolls. “Do they mean you won’t be pulling my hair anymore?”
“I won’t have a choice.” He searched her face longingly, desperately, as if c
ollecting every detail into a special pocket of memory made just for her.
I needed something to remember you by.
She shivered and steadied the gun. “Why did you come back?”
The heat in his eyes said, To fuck you. His suspicious non-answers said, To kill you.
“Just say it, Van.” If she shot him, Mattie was dead. If he killed her, Josh would kill him. Mattie was dead either way.
“I’m sorry about your mom.” Sincerity wrinkled the skin around his eyes, but his voice was a monotone hum. His lips clenched on the toothpick, flattening into a line. His gaze hardened.
He was planning something cruel. Her molars sawed together, her nerves stretching. She bit down so hard on her cheek the taste of copper filled her mouth. “You murdered Mom.”
His face clouded, his timbre scratchy. “I’m sorry. I…” His expression blanked. He reached behind his back.
Jesus, he was going to kill her. Her heart stopped, and her finger slid over the trigger.
Time throttled into a series of choices, measured by the slam of her heart and the cascading motions that followed. Van tugged at something in the back of his jeans. She squeezed the trigger, and Josh yelled, “No!”
The recoil reverberated down her arms, and Van stumbled sideways.
He slumped against the bar. A dark circle of blood spread on the shoulder of his black t-shirt. He frowned at the crumpled paper in his hand, and the toothpick fell from his slack mouth.
“Oh, God.” Her voice was an echo in her fuzzy head. She lowered the gun, blinked. He hadn’t been reaching for a weapon.
He laughed, coughed. “I deserved that.” His legs slid out from beneath him, and he toppled to the floor.
Josh skidded through the room, tucking his gun in his jeans, his panic jolting her to move. Numb with shock, she handed the gun to him and knelt beside Van.
A river of blood soaked his shirt, coursed down his arm, and pooled beneath him. He lay on his back and peered up at her with the most heart-breaking expression on his contorted, beautiful face. No hint of anger or blame. It was as if he knew he was dying, and he was okay with it.
