by K E Osborn
Me: Okay, looking forward to seeing u. Guess I’ll try to get some sleep. Have a good night.
A2 xxxx
I hit send and roll over plugging my phone in the charger.
Aston: Night Lennox, sleep well. I know I will now. Might be dreaming of someone, but shhh don’t tell anyone ;) A1 xo
I smile and bite my bottom lip and walk over to pick up my Slayed T-shirt to get dressed for bed.
My dream is like a symphony running through my mind. The notes all flowing harmoniously and merging into a fantastic new song. The rhythm is slow, but with a steady beat. There're no words only melody and my heart is jumping along with every chord. It’s blissful and I know this song is going to be a hit. I just need some lyrics. An image of the willow tree floats through my subconscious and I wonder why it’s in my musical fantasy land. But it soon disappears and is replaced by a sea of string instruments making the musical piece even better. The song is slowly concluding and I will for it to be on repeat, but the music is fading and the realm I am in turns black and then I wake up suddenly. My room is still dark as I look at the clock on my table. Three forty-seven a.m. I shake my head and turn on the bedside light and pull open my drawer grabbing my notebook. I pick up a pen and start to write down everything I can remember. The beats, the harmony, the melody, the strings… everything, and later on today I might take Aston under the willow tree so he can help me piece this all together and maybe, just maybe, we can share another kiss.
I wake from the same dream that seems to be on repeat and I feel blissfully happy. Normally I don’t wake on my own, Mum always has to wake me up, but today I feel refreshed and energised. It could be from the dream or probably from the realisation that I do like Aston and that kiss! Oh my God, I never knew kissing could be so amazing. I stretch and yawn as I sit up in bed and look over at the time. It’s nearly nine a.m. the time I’m supposed to get up anyway. I step out of bed with a new found spring in my step and make my way to the bathroom.
I head downstairs after getting dressed in some tight leather pants and a black tank that is slightly ripped across the shoulders and stomach, giving it a real rock and roll feel. I’m sure Dad will hate it. I giggle to myself as nothing can break this good mood I’m in. I walk into the kitchen to the smell of coffee and bacon, and that only enhances my good mood.
“Morning,” I chime out to Mum and Dad, who are at the stove cooking. They both turn and look at me like they’ve seen a ghost.
“What?” I ask as I almost skip to the dining table and sit down.
“Umm… who are you and what have you done with our moody, morning hating teenager?” Mum asks with a giant smile.
“What? So I’m not allowed to get up and be happy for once?” I reply and she shakes her head while Dad just stares at me like he thinks I’m an imposter.
“No, of course, honey. It’s just you haven’t gotten up on your own for… well, since you were about five?”
“Yeah, you’re probably right. I just feel good this morning that’s all,” I say while opening up the paper and look for the comic section.
“Does this have anything to do with the kiss you and Aston shared last night?” Mum asks and Dad huffs.
“Let’s not talk about that right now, okay? I can’t shake the image from my head as it is,” Dad states and I roll my eyes while Mum looks at me. She smiles so brightly and winks at me, then turns back to the stove to finish with the bacon.
Not long after Ella comes down and she’s dressed to perfection like always. We really have polar opposite tastes in clothing. As a family, we eat breakfast together and not long after I’m in the music room waiting for everyone else to arrive. But mainly one person in particular. He hasn’t sent me any messages this morning, but I am bursting to see him. I know Dad is going to be here with us all day today, so I realise that will stop us from having any time together. Ella and Dad walk into the music room as I am tuning my guitar and the doorbell rings.
“I’ll get it. Annie stay here,” he says and I furrow my eyebrows in confusion and shake my head as he rushes out the door.
“What was that about?” Ella asks and I shrug.
“I guess he’s going to be a dickwad today and try and stop me and Aston from having any time together,” I say and she smiles brightly.
“I heard Dad and Aston’s Mum arguing over the fact that Dad found Aston on top of you snogging your brains out,” Ella says with a smirk.
I try to hide my smile as I touch my lips remembering his affectionate kiss. “Yeah, that might have happened,” I tease and her eyes open wide.
“So tell me, how was it? Kissing I mean? Is it as amazing as it is in the movies?” Ella asks.
“Even better than the movies Ella,” I say and she jumps on the spot.
“So what does this mean? Are you and Aston a thing now?” she asks quietly and before I have a chance to answer Aston, Caleb and Dad walk into the music room shutting down our conversation.
My eyes meet Aston’s and he glances at me giving me a very quick, awkward smile but then he turns away from me and looks down at the ground. My heart is racing at seeing him and somehow today he looks even more gorgeous than I’ve ever seen him before. The hairs on my arms rise up and that tingling shoots straight through me making my breathing increase slightly. I notice my palms are sweating and I rub them on my pants, just in case Aston wants to grab my hand, which I hope he does.
“So we’re just waiting on Chad, then we can rehearse and I can tell you all your exciting news,” Dad says as Aston walks straight past me without acknowledging my presence.
I furrow my brows as I watch him pass me. My heart races faster as I get an awkward feeling in my gut. I feel like something is off and even though I want to be near Aston so much it hurts, it seems he’s doing everything in his power to not be near me at all. I frown and look at Ella, who shrugs and winces apparently picking up on the weird vibe emanating throughout the room.
“Right, so if everyone wants to start getting their instruments ready while we wait,” Dad says breaking the awkward tension. I huff and strap my guitar on while continuing to tune it as Aston picks up his bass and wraps it around himself. I wish I was his bass guitar right now, being so close to him and those abs.
Someone clears their throat and I realise I was staring at Aston’s stomach. I look up to see Dad staring at me and I roll my eyes and continue tuning, but still taking sideways glances at Aston, who isn’t looking at me at all. I feel uneasy. Maybe he doesn’t want me anymore? Maybe Dad scared him so much he realised I’m not worth the fuss? Either way I’m not feeling anything from Aston right now other than the cold shoulder, so I have no idea how this rehearsal is going to go.
The doorbell rings and we all look at Dad to see if he is going to answer, but he looks at me and then to Aston.
“Ella sweetheart, will you go let Chad in please?” he asks and we all raise an eyebrow at him in confusion.
“But I’m tuning my guitar?” she replies.
“You have all day to do that, just go answer the damned door,” he says sounding frustrated.
“Okay sheesh, don’t get your panties in a twist,” she says unstrapping her guitar and walking out of the room.
“Don’t talk to me like that, Ella,” Dad calls out, he seems really on edge. I wonder if this is all because he obviously wants to be around me all day to make sure I don’t make out with Aston again. Which by the looks of things isn’t going to happen because, at the moment, he doesn’t even want to look at me.
This sucks!
I glance over at Aston, who’s purposely avoiding me. This is not how today was supposed to go… at all. He was supposed to walk into the room and come over and wrap me in his strong arms and hold me tightly. Maybe even lean down and kiss me softly, but instead I’m being rejected and I have no idea why? I feel maybe he’s regretting what happened last night and that he’s changed his mind and realised that I’m really not worth it. I swallow a lump in my throat and try to fight back the
tears threatening to fall as Chad walks in with Ella. Dad smiles as Chad talks about some new brand of hair wax he is trying out. His hair looks exactly the same as it always does a blond mess, more like a nest. I’ve never met anyone who looks so scruffy in all my life, even I at least try to match my clothes.
“Okay, now that we’re all here I can announce what is happening today and tonight. Today we’re rehearsing and then tonight, a band has pulled out of a three band concert, so Rob has lined up your first live and paying gig—”
“Holy shit!” Caleb and I both yell out in unison.
“Seriously?” Ella asks while Chad stands there with his mouth open looking shocked. I don’t look over to Aston because if he still doesn’t look at me I’ll be heartbroken.
“Yes seriously. So today I am going to coach you about performing live. Even though I know you’ll be fine, it’s different having a large audience to play to instead of your family.
“We can handle it,” I say honestly. I know we can. We’ve all been around large crowds so performing in front of them will be easy as.
Dad pulls us in for a long talk about stage etiquette and how to work the crowds. He talks about living in the moment and blah, blah, blah… I tune out after the first hour because he’s boring me and I have the attention span of a goldfish. So my mind wanders to Aston and to what he is thinking. We’re all sitting in a horseshoe shape and Aston is two people away from me so I can only just see him, but I wish I knew what he was thinking. He looks so intense and I don’t know if that’s because he’s taking it all in or because he seriously doubts everything. Me, our friendship, the band? I have no idea and I wish I could just get a second alone with him to figure out the broody depressed look on his face.
It makes me uneasy and even when we break from Dad’s pep talk and we start to practice Aston doesn’t come near me. We always lean on each other, but every time I turn my back to him letting him know I’m waiting for him to back up into me, he does nothing but look down at the ground and play his bass. He’s still rocking it and we sound great, but my enthusiasm and energy isn’t at its normal peak.
Dad hasn’t left the room all day and whenever I’d leave the room he would follow. I know he’s trying to make sure Aston and I aren’t alone together, but I honestly don’t think he needs to worry about that because Aston is avoiding me as much as humanly possible. He hasn’t said one word to me. Not even a hello, and I have this aching feeling in my gut that things are not okay between us, and that whatever we shared last night was the end of our friendship. And that thought is killing me right now.
The rest of the day was spent rehearsing in awkward tension. Dad is watching me like a hawk and if he wants me to perform at my best tonight he needs to loosen the reigns a little because right now I am feeling stressed. Being next to Aston all day, but him not even acknowledging me let alone anything else, is making my skin tingle and not in a good way.
The rest of the parents have made their way over and we’re all heading into London to play our first gig. Luckily our parents know how to go about all this and they help us load our instruments into Dingo’s van and then we all drive up to London toward our first ever live performance.
I’m nervous and extremely excited, but the excitement is dulled slightly by the nerves I have about Aston. I did see him looking at me a couple of times today, but when he saw I was watching he quickly looked away.
I don’t know what is up with him? And all I do know is that it’s unsettling. I take a deep breath as Dad drives on the highway toward London.
“That’s a big sigh. You okay?” Ella asks quietly as she sits next to me in the backseat.
I shrug and the threat of tears is imminent. She draws her eyebrows together and takes my hand in hers and squeezes tightly. She leans into her pocket and pulls out her phone. I glance at her and wonder what she’s doing when she types something into the screen and then I feel my pocket vibrate. I smirk at her knowing we’re about to chat via text so the parentals don’t hear.
I let go of her hand and pull out my phone swiping the screen and opening her message.
Ella: Why is Aston avoiding you? Is that what’s bothering you?
I nod at her and she frowns, so I type a reply.
Me: I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. He really seemed to want me last night and today he can’t even look at me, and when he does he looks away as soon as I see him… :(
I hit send. She opens the screen and I watch her face fall as she reads the message. Then she types back.
Ella: I saw him looking at you a lot today. I think he wants to be near you but is scared to. To be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised if Dad has something to do with it. I’m sure there is a perfectly good reason for him avoiding you. Trust me when I say he was looking at you. The times I saw him doing it, he looked upset like he wanted to go to you, but he was restraining himself. There’s more to the story Annie, trust me!
I shrug and bite my bottom lip. “I hope you’re right,” I whisper and she leans over, taking me in an embrace and squeezing me tightly.
We arrive at the large venue. Apparently inside can hold up to ten thousand occupants and when people heard that Staked, the kids of the band Slayed were performing, well Rob said the ticket sales went through the roof. So we’re expecting close to capacity, and I think ten thousand is huge, but Dad has played stadiums that can cater to and hold over one hundred thousand fans so that’s something to work toward.
I’m getting more and more excited as we get out of Dad’s car and walk over to Dingo’s van ready to pull out our instruments. There're three bands playing tonight and we’re the last to go on, so we have a few hours to kill before the show. Maybe I can find an opportunity to talk to Aston, or maybe I should leave it till after the show. Because if he says he doesn’t want to be near me anymore that could ruin my performance. Ella wraps her arm around mine as she bounces along happily. I love her energy, she’s making my dull mood a little brighter.
“I can’t wait to get in there for sound check. Our first ever sound check Annie, can you believe it!” she says excitedly.
I laugh at her as she drags me along and we enter the giant venue. “Slow down, Ella, I can’t run in these boots.”
“Annie, I’m running in heels. I don’t think your combat boots compare in running difficulty,” she says and I roll my eyes as we follow our mum down the hallway and into a large green room.
“Holy shit, this is getting real,” I whisper and Ella lets out an excited squeal and tightens her grip on my arm.
“I know!”
We walk in to see plush lounge suites situated around the edge of the room. There’s a little kitchen area with a fridge, and on the counter in front of it is some platters of fruit and cheeses and other stuff that I really want to get stuck into.
“Oh my God, food!” I say and drag Ella toward the platters.
We both giggle slightly and I move in to pick up some creamy looking cheese when Dad slaps it out of my hand.
“Ouch Dad, what the hell was that for?” I ask looking up at him.
“Nothing dairy before a performance, Annie. Weren’t you listening to my talk this morning?” he asks as he picks up the cheese platter and puts it in the fridge.
“No, I tuned out. Why can’t I have dairy?”
“Because it will affect your vocal cords,” Ella says and Dad smiles at her and caresses her shoulder.
“It’s nice to know someone was listening,” he says and then looks over at Caleb who’s having a beer.
“Caleb, you shouldn’t drink before a show,” he calls out walking off. He really is in complete control freak mode right now.
Ella and I giggle and pick up a strawberry each and clink them together.
“Fruit is okay though, right?” I ask and she shrugs and takes a large bite of the strawberry.
I laugh and take a bite of mine. “You rebel you,” I say to Ella and she nods.
We finish eating as much fruit as we can before Mum walk
s over and stops us.
“Girls, don’t have a full belly on stage. If you get nervous it can make you feel sick,” she says taking the piece of kiwi fruit from me and placing it back on the tray. I guess she’s right, the last thing I need is for my nerves to get even worse and for me to puke all over the crowd. I giggle to myself at the imagery in my head.
I’ve purposely been trying to avoid looking at Aston, but he’s on the other side of the room with Chad and Caleb. I’m happy to not be concentrating on us right now.
“How are you feeling?” Mum asks taking us both over to the lounge suite to sit down.
“Great,” I say honestly and Ella shrugs.
“What’s wrong, Ella?” Mum asks and I look at her suddenly concerned for my sister.
“I don’t know. What if I forget what to play up there? I won’t have my music notes to guide me if I get lost,” she says.
“Oh sweetheart, you’ve been doing so well at home. Just pretend that you’re playing to me and if you get in trouble then don’t worry about it. It’s your first live performance so I don’t expect everything to be perfect. I just want you to have fun that’s all,” Mum says and I nod in agreement.
“Plus, if you get lost just look at me and I’ll help you. Come and stand next to me tonight if you want, that way you can hear my guitar better?” I say and she nods and takes a deep breath.
“Okay, but I’ll stand on my side of the stage first and if I feel like I’m getting lost I’ll come over to you.”
“So are we all ready for our first gig?” Rob calls out over making himself heard over all the talking.
“Yep,” I call out at the same time as Caleb.
“Okay, so Peripheral is going on in about half an hour. When they finish Red Velvet will go on and then the band everyone in this place has been waiting for…” he pauses for dramatic effect, “Staked!” he says and I cheer as does Caleb.
