They seemed to be at a crossroads in their relationship. Up to now, he had been having fun, enjoying the time they spent together but never worrying about or even considering their future. He didn't want anything to change and bringing in love with all its attendant responsibilities was a huge change and one he didn't think he was ready for.
Lisa, on the other hand, seemed to love him with all of her heart, which only made him feel worse.
Will felt like he stood at a tipping point and that if he became unbalanced in some way, he'd either slide deeply in love with her forever or else end the relationship painfully. He was afraid either way. He didn't think he could break up with her, because he knew it would hurt her too badly. At the same time, if he let go and embraced her with all of his heart, then what?
Would he be next in line to be married?
Was he going to become whipped as his friends joked and stop being himself and start being "Lisa's Boyfriend?" Was he going to miss out on all the fun and let life pass him by? He started to feel that he was too immature to be in love.
The immaturity however was strictly emotional.
Physically, his body made great demands on him. He felt an urgent need to be with her sexually and it started to dominate his thinking when he was with her. She, on the other hand wasn't ready for sex. But, she wasn't prudish either and they had done their fair share of necking and fooling around. Of course, that just made it harder on Will when she told him to stop.
All of this zipped through his mind as he half-walked, half-ran around the sea wall to where they were supposed to meet. Lisa lived in the smallest and most rundown of the islands four apartment buildings, something his mom pointed out repeatedly. This was another painful aspect of their romance, his mother didn't approve of Lisa. She didn't come out and say the words of course, but it was there and he wondered if he held back in some way to please her.
Lisa was waiting for him outside her building and when she spotted him, ran up excitedly. "Hey you," she said right before she kissed him. It was a long slow kiss. "So, what do you want to do?" she asked with a smile, as she pulled back and looked up at him.
"I dunno. I got paid yesterday so if you want to go see what's playing at the theater we could do that."
Back in March, he had managed to secure a job: he worked part time for a friend of his dad's in the service management office. This meant he mowed the grass in the summer and did odd jobs whenever they came up.
It wasn't great money or even good hours, but he couldn't bring himself to flip burgers at Burger King, the island's only fast food place. Lisa however did and it was the smell of her clothes when she got off work that kept him from ever taking a job there. She called the smell "Will Repellant" and she refused to let him see her until she had dashed home, showered, and changed.
He usually ended up paying for most of their dates and he didn't mind a bit. He thought of it as his duty as the boyfriend to pay her way and he also knew that despite her working longer hours than he did, she had far less money to spend on fun. Her money went to buy necessities like clothing, school supplies, and sometimes food, for her and her younger brother.
To Lisa's bitter embarrassment, her mother was a boozer. Sometimes her mother would "borrow" money from Lisa's pockets so Will frequently held onto her money for her. The drinking was the primary reason Lisa refused to ever let him near her apartment.
"I think they're still playing, Kramer versus Kramer and once was too much for me," Lisa said. Will had to agree—it was dull. "We can go by the Teen Club," Lisa suggested. The Teen Club was the Coast Guard's way to try to reduce vandalism and other mischief done by bored children, by organizing supervised fun.
Supervised fun was not Will's idea of fun. "That place is getting overrun by middle schoolers. Carlos Manalo is throwing a party, how bout we go?" It was worth a shot.
"Carlos? I'd rather not. His parties can get pretty crazy." She wrinkled her nose at the idea. Because of her mother's boozing, Lisa didn't like to be around people when they were drinking and she never touched a drop of alcohol herself. "Are Talitha and Brian going?"
"No, they're going to the library." That had been his only chance at going to the party. If Talitha went then Lisa would go, but unfortunately for him, Talitha was even more against these parties than Lisa. She saw them for what they were: childish and stupid, and really just an excuse to get drunk. He disliked the getting drunk part and tended to leave at the first sign of vomit.
"The library, again? She loves her books way too much!" Lisa took him by the arm and started to lead him away from the building and toward the seawall. "If she had to choose between Brian and all of her books, which would she choose?"
They came up to the seawall and leaned against the chain link fence. The setting sun warmed the evening and quite a few people were taking in the glowing New York skyline.
"That's just it," he said. "She'll never have to choose, since he loves books almost as much as she does." The wind coming off the water blew Lisa's hair back and her eyes shown a brilliant green. Will looked at her and thought she was the prettiest he had ever seen her. His love or liking or whatever it was that he felt for her, filled him suddenly and he took her in his arms and kissed her for a long time.
When they broke apart, Lisa gazed out to the sunset and seemed lost in thought. "They're pretty lucky. I wish..." she paused and sighed.
"You wish what?"
"Nothing. They're just lucky that's all. They're made for each other don't you think?"
3
Talitha and Brian did seem to be two peas in a very nerdy pod. They started going out the previous October after Will had explained to Talitha The Math concerning the thought process behind how boys asked girls out. Very soon after that she surprised him when she actually flirted with a boy.
"Hello Brian. That's a nice shirt you're wearing," she had said. The subtly of this little comment was almost lost on Will. It wasn't until later when he looked at Brian's striped shirt, that he realized it was the same shirt he wore every fourth or fifth day and it wasn't nice at all.
For Talitha, this constituted flirting. However, it was with a boy, Will wouldn't have suggested, but at least it was a start.
If anyone could claim to be bookish, nerdy, and shy, it was Brian Galt. However, he wasn't wholly a lost cause. He played on the high school football team, strictly junior varsity, but it was something. Another not-so-nerdy aspect of Brian's was his confidence; he had an unusual, almost commanding air about himself.
However, being a nerd was almost all about looks. Brian stood a scant two inches taller than Talitha, while his large glasses and the ever-present science fiction book in his hands increased his nerd factor. He was a loner and Will frequently saw him sitting by himself reading.
On the other side of the ledger, Brian was aggressive and tough when called for. Will had seen him fight twice in the short time he knew him and both times, Brian had ended the fights in seconds with blazing fast punches. Talitha had called him a dichotomy and after Will looked it up, he had agreed.
But, dichotomy or not, Brian didn't seem to realize Talitha's sudden interest in his apparel signified flirting. She tried again the next day.
"Brian, you're taking calculus, right? Could you show me how to do this problem?" This was like Beethoven asking somebody what the black keys on a piano were for and Will almost jokingly called her a slut.
Talitha and Brian talked math for a while and the conversation seemed short and to the point, and if there was any flirting going on, Will missed it completely.
When she left, Brian blurted, "I'm going to ask your sister out."
Brian asked Talitha to a Halloween party the next day, and now seven months later, they appeared to be the happiest nerd couple he'd ever seen.
He sometimes even envied them. They were so smooth together and they seemed to fit so right. Will could tell that neither of them doubted for a second the truth of their feelings.
It was his own doubt that he kne
w was the problem. He was lost in thought as they wandered slowly down the road with the sun easing down, seemingly right into the waters of the harbor.
"Talitha and Brian were made for each other," Lisa said a second time. "Tell me, do you believe in soul mates?"
His first thought was Inmates and that made him feel like a complete jerk. "I don't know," Will answered. "Maybe."
"They're so perfect for each other," she said placidly, but he knew her well enough to know that she had been irked at his response.
They strolled inland with no particular destination in mind and didn't speak much, which would've been normal. The two of them were very comfortable with each other and didn't feel the need to talk, just for the sake of being heard. Except that night, Lisa had something to say, which she was finding difficult to spit out.
They walked down Clayton Road and Will decided to cross the Village Green. The Green was a large oak-lined park and he loved to lie in its soft grasses. He grabbed her and pulled her down onto the lawn, beside him, and decided he'd just wait patiently until she was ready to talk.
Colonels Row was visible a short distance away, Lisa asked, "Which one's going to be your house?"
In the daytime all the homes looked pretty much identical. Now they all were lit and seemed lively, except for one that was very dark in comparison.
He pointed to the dark one. "It doesn't look too happy."
Lisa hopped up. "Come on, I want to see it." She dragged him to his feet and they set off toward the house. "Do you know which one is your room? Is it on this side of the house?"
"Mine is in the attic, either those windows on the left or the ones nearer to the center. I haven't decided which room I want." Will pointed up to the top most of the black windows, they seemed very high up. "Talitha wants a room around the other side of the house, on the second floor. It's so small." They were nearing the dark house and Will's voice dropped to slightly above a whisper. "You'd think after being squished in that terrible apartment for so long she'd want one of the bigger ones upstairs."
They stopped on the brick sidewalk that ran all along the Row and stood looking up at the house. It was full dark now and it made the house look brooding and uninviting.
4
"Look at this place," Lisa remarked quietly. "It's like you're rich or something." She climbed the stairs to the porch and turned back, looking out at the Village Green.
He joined her and the view was beautiful. The lights from the building across the Green twinkled warmly through the trees and they heard kids laughing and yelling down the long row of houses to the left. To the right soft music came from the house next door. Will looked in that direction, but could see no one in any of the windows; the closed drapes barely allowed any light to seep through.
Behind them, Will's new house stood looming, completely silent.
Lisa went to the front door and tried the knob, it opened and she turned back, giving Will her patented wide-eyed 'I'm about to make mischief' smile. She glanced up and down the Row, and then slipped into the house. He quickly followed after and nearly knocked her down when he stepped into the foyer.
The foyer, a partially enclosed room was almost pitch black. "Sorry about that," he whispered. Lisa shushed him as if he were being loud in some way.
He found her hand in the dark and pulled her into the living room, which was better lit from its three windows. Even so, it took a few seconds for their eyes to get used to the dark and then Lisa went to the grand staircase, and ran her hands over the wood banister.
"Wow, this is so nice," she whispered. She then went into the main living room area, not bothering to wait for him and walked to the large fireplace, caressing the wood. "I sure would like to see this in the daytime. Do you think your Mom is going to invite me for dinner anytime soon? Now that she's losing her big excuse, that is."
His mom refused to have anyone visit them in their tiny apartment and their move in date to the big house was a week away. However, Will didn't think she would be sending Lisa an invite in the near future. He could already hear the excuses: "We just moved in, let's give it a few weeks; It's almost your Dad's birthday, maybe next month."
He could think of nothing to say that was believable. "Possibly," he managed finally, with a shrug.
"Sure, maybe I'll just hold my breath." Lisa turned away from him and went into the dining room. Over her shoulder, she murmured, "It's your house too, Will."
He was perplexed at her behavior. She was normally the sweetest person he knew. Will caught up to her as she was heading into the kitchen. "Hey, are you ok?"
She stared at the huge kitchen. "I'm fine, don't worry about me. This room alone could hold half my apartment." She exaggerated, but only by a little. Lisa walked around the room, her green eyes running over the appliances, the windows, and even the wallpaper. "I don't like it," she declared. "It's neither as old and classy as the rest of the place nor is it modern enough. It's got to be one or the other."
Will looked around; he'd been in the house only once before and had never given the room much thought. "As long as there is food in here, I'll be happy," he said. Lisa was quiet for a time as if thinking, and he found it hard to judge her feelings in the darkness.
"Basement?" she asked suddenly, pointing to the basement door. She didn't wait for an answer, but walked past it to the back staircase. These were narrow and as she began walking up them, surprisingly loud. She stopped quickly and paused listening, but after a few seconds she started up again, this time more quietly. Will followed after.
Lisa acted as her own tour guide. She went to the second floor, took the right into the hallway and stopped briefly looking into Talitha's room.
"If this is Tal's room, you're right it's dinky," she said quietly, before moving on to the family room. Here she didn't even pause since it was utterly dark. Instead, she looked into the master bedroom and whistled at the size of it and at the fireplace. "Fancy, fancy, their own fireplace," she muttered almost to herself. "Must be nice." And with that, she marched past a confused Will and into Katie's room.
She paused in the doorway of the little room and slowly bent down and felt the long fibers of the carpet. She then went over to the windows and Will came up behind her, putting his arms around her waist and holding her. There was something wrong with Lisa, but for the life of him, he didn't know what it was.
The view was the exact same as from the porch, just at a slightly higher angle. The lights of Ligget Hall, across the Green from them were golden and pretty through the trees.
Lisa turned around and kissed him aggressively, almost fiercely. She pulled him down onto the carpet, continuing to kiss him. He was pleasantly surprised at this and kissed her back with passion. She took his hand and laid it on her breast, he massaged it as they kissed and she moaned softly. It became obvious that he was getting aroused and that's when Lisa said, "I love you Will. I truly do."
He paused slightly. "I love you, too." He was a little puzzled again, at her behavior and how she'd said, "I truly do," because it sounded like she was talking to herself.
"Ok, we're done. Get off me please," she demanded without explanation. He pulled back and knelt on the long light yellow shag carpet, confusion marring his handsome features. She saw his look and gave a shrug. "I'm...I'm sorry about that. I'm going to check out the rest of the house. Are you coming or what?"
"What the hell is going on?" Will hissed. "This whole night you're acting like I did something wrong. Why don't you tell me what game you're playing here?"
"I'm not playing anymore, so you don't have to worry," she spoke quietly and walked off down the hall toward the back stairs.
Dumbfounded, he knelt in Katie's room and just shook his head trying to make sense of what had happened. When he heard her on the stairs going up, he got to his feet and followed after.
He found her at the end of the hall in the bedroom to the right; she was just looking at the floor and holding herself with both arms.
"Don't choose this
room, it's pretty cold," she advised.
"I don't think you have the right to treat me this way," he said quietly.
She turned toward him and there were tears in her eyes. "You're right. I screwed up somewhere. Probably a year ago. Either way," she paused and looked away blinking rapidly as more tears formed, threatening to spill over. "I should have...man it's cold in here. I think the air conditioner is on."
Will felt it then as well.
It was very cold in the room all of a sudden and he began rubbing his arms. He was just about to ask her why she felt that she screwed up when he heard someone moving about in the kitchen. After the briefest hesitation, he leapt quietly to Lisa and placed his hand over her mouth, just as she was about to speak.
"There's someone down stairs," he whispered this so softly that he was afraid that she didn't hear it, but a moment later she nodded her head.
Will realized with the rooms empty there was absolutely no place to hide and a thread of disquiet started to unravel somewhere deep within him. Their best course of action was to get out before whoever it was came up stairs. He figured it to be the Security Patrol and that someone must have seen them come in.
"Let's go downstairs," he said as low as before. "If they stay in the kitchen, we'll go out the way we came in. You head straight home; I'll get them to chase me. I can out run all of the SPs, so don't worry, just go home. I'll call you."
She nodded a second time in agreement.
He reached down and slid his tennis shoes off and when Lisa did the same, he started to silently slide over the hardwood floors. When he reached the stairs, he paused listening. Barely twenty seconds had passed since Will had first heard the person and whoever it was sounded like he was still in the kitchen.
Will put his shoelaces in his mouth and half-slid down the walls, keeping the weight of his feet off the center of the stairs, trying only to touch the edges. Lisa imitated him and though they were nearly noiseless, they still made enough sound that Will thought the person in the kitchen should have heard something.
The Trilogy of the Void: The Complete Boxed Set Page 6
