He kissed the top of my head and held me tight as we danced. “Feel better?”
I nodded. “I’m still thinking about your wife, though.”
“Don’t. Like I’ve told you before, she and I may be married, but our relationship ended a long time ago.”
“I know you need to stay with her until the campaign is over, but that doesn’t make it any less hard for me.”
“It’s… complicated, but my staying with her has nothing to do with the campaign. Trust me, soon enough she’ll be out of the picture, and you and I can be together.”
I snorted. I may have been crazy for Luke, but I wasn’t stupid. He was the governor and I was a nobody. He had a certain image he had to uphold, and I didn’t fit into that picture.
“What?” he asked.
“You and I aren’t going to get our happy ending. I don’t think the public would like it if you left your perfect blond haired, blue eyed wife for your black side piece.”
“Fuck them. I’ll give up my position as governor before I give you up.”
As smart as he was, he was incredibly unrealistic about the scope of our relationship. I was his mistress, and nothing more. He was going to have an amazing political career, but I was nothing more than a scandal by his side.
“You love being governor.”
“Yeah. So?”
It was either his career or me- he had to choose. And I would never force him to make a choice like that. I’d always known that our relationship had a time limit; I just didn’t expect it to end so soon, so abruptly. With the oncoming media storm that we’d be facing, it seemed like our time was finally up. He must’ve been reading my mind.
“We need to stick together through this. Things are going to get bad, but we’ll make it through.”
The song changed and the music increased to a fast dance song. We were in the eleventh hour of our relationship, and I wanted to enjoy the little bit of time we had left. Trying to distract myself from oncoming tears, I dropped to the floor and shook my ass to the beat, showing him what I was working with.
I rose back up and swerved my body against his, laughing as he tried to keep up with me.
“I’m so glad we didn’t meet in a club. I would’ve probably just walked right by you,” I said.
Our laughter was interrupted by a banging on the door. My heart stopped and I looked up at Luke with wide eyes. No one knew we were there, so I wondered who it could be. Maybe someone saw us enter the same room? Were the pictures leaked online already?
I jumped when the banging started again. Whoever it was, they weren’t going away. Luke straightened out his shirt and walked to the door. I walked into the bathroom to hide.
*
Even with the bathroom door closed, I could still clearly hear the screaming from the woman at the door.
“Where is she?”
It didn’t take a genius to figure out that it was Mrs. Allsworth. I reached to the doorknob to lock myself in the room, but she was quicker than me.
The door flung open, and our eyes met for the first time. Her mouth gaped open as she gasped.
“This is who you’ve been cheating on me with this entire time?”
“Amy, calm down-”
She wasn’t interested in Luke’s words. “Don’t tell me to calm down. You have ruined everything because you couldn’t keep your dick in your pants.”
“Nothing is ruined; this isn’t the end of the world.”
She stuck her manicured finger in his face, sneering. “It better not be. But don’t think I’m going to be the forgiving wife, staying by your side when the shit hits the fan. You’re dealing with this on your own. I hope your whore was worth it.”
“Watch it, bitch,” I said, although I had no leg to stand on.
She was right; I was a whore. I didn’t know all of the details of their relationship, but whether they were on the rocks or not, they still had a life built together. And whatever their issues were, I officially became the reason for their demise the second I opened my legs for Luke.
Before I could react, she grabbed a handful of my hair and yanked me to the ground. Her petite frame was very misleading- she was a lot stronger than she looked.
She swung at my face, but I blocked her hit and jumped to my feet before shoving her on the ground. I straddled her body and Luke wrapped his arms around me and pulled me off of her.
“Enough!” he said. “This isn’t happening. Go home, Amy.”
She stood from the ground and sucker punched me while Luke was still holding on to me. I jerked out of his arms and charged her, our bodies falling down and crashing over the coffee table. Luke tried to step in again, but we were rolling too fast and our arms were flailing out of control. I didn’t want to fight her, but she left me no choice.
As soon as he had an opportunity, Luke yanked Amy up by her arm, her delicate body flinging in the air like a rag doll. He forced her to the door, and she kicked and screamed on her way out.
“This isn’t over, bitch! I’ll kill you if I catch you with him again.”
Luke whispered something to her at the door and it seemed to calm her down. I went back into the bathroom to inspect the damage. My lip was busted and my eye was beginning to swell. I had scratches on my chest and arms, and… was that a bite mark? What a tough little bitch.
There was a light tap on the door and Luke stepped in, brows crunched together. He gently rubbed my skin, carefully inspecting each mark.
“I’m so sorry about that, Steph.”
I shook my head, dabbing at my bloody lip with a wet rag. “Don’t be. She had every right to attack me. How stupid of me to think that she didn’t know…”
“Are you okay?”
“Yes. I just really want to get home please.”
I could tell that he was upset at my request to leave, but he nodded. He kissed me on the cheek before offering his hand.
“Let’s go.”
We never left the hotel together; usually his driver would take me home and then come back to pick up Luke. We strolled through the lobby to his waiting limo. I think people were too distracted by my battered face to notice Luke.
When we stepped outside of the hotel’s glass doors, it was a different story. I winced as bright lights shined in my face and a horde of reporters rushed towards us. Luke grabbed the small of my back and guided me to the car.
I jumped at a microphone that flashed in my face. “How long have you two been having an affair?” the woman on the other end of the mic asked.
“Would you like to make a statement, Governor Allsworth?” another asked.
“Ma’am, what’s your name?”
We jumped into the car and sped away from the flock, my body trembling in the back seat.
“Did your wife tell them we were here? Why would she do that?”
He shook his head. “No, she wouldn’t do that. Making our affair public knowledge hurts her as much as us. It had to be someone from the hotel who spotted us and made the call.”
I ran my fingers through my hair. “Oh, my God. I can’t wait to get home.”
“They don’t know who you are yet, but that won’t last for long. I don’t think you should go home.”
“I’ll be fine. I just want to curl up in my bed and forget his night ever happened.”
He patted my leg as the car pulled up to my tiny apartment. “Everything will be okay.”
I kissed him goodbye, but shook my head at his words. Nothing was going to be okay.
*
I collapsed in bed the second I walked into the house. My laptop was within arms’ reach and I thought about going online to see the damage. Blinking back tears, I decided against it. I snuggled up tight under my covers and closed my eyes, trying to sleep.
Of course, sleep was impossible, so I stared into the blackness until my alarm went off in the morning. I hit the snooze button, allowing myself ten minutes to decide if I wanted to call off of work or not. I didn’t want to leave the house, but I knew that
I’d drive myself crazy just lying around all day.
I forced myself out of bed and showered and dressed. The scene outside of my building was eerily similar to the one in front of the hotel the night before. It didn’t take them long to figure out who Governor Allsworth’s mistress was. Reporters ran to me as soon as they saw me exit.
“Stephanie! Just one question for you.”
I rushed to my car, my hands shaking as they pressed their microphones and cameras against my windows. Once I was sure I wasn’t going to run over any one of them, I slammed on the gas and sped away.
While on the highway, my cell phone rang. I blushed when I saw that it was Greg. It was highly unlikely that he didn’t know about Luke and me at that point, so why was he calling? To curse me out for using him? To get some dirt on the situation?
I hit the ignore button and continued to work. I realized was going to miss Greg. I really enjoyed getting to know him over the previous few weeks. But I stupidly chose a married man over him, and now I had no one. My stomach churned when I pulled into the parking lot to my job. There were a handful news station vans out front.
I worked at a women’s reproductive clinic. We were a non-profit organization that provided affordable and quality health care. We were also one of the few places in the area that performed abortions, so there were frequently protestors outside and we occasionally made the five o’clock news.
Only this time, I knew that the media outside wasn’t there for the controversial procedures that we performed inside; they were there for me.
I pulled around to the back of the building, a sigh of relief escaping my lips once I saw that none of them were back there. I quickly exited my car and entered in the key code to get into the office.
When I entered the office, all eyes shot over to me. The staff watched my every move as I walked in. The beginning of the fallout; I was going to have to get used to a lot more eyes being on me. As I approached my desk, my manager stopped me.
“Stephanie, can I talk to you for a moment?”
“Uh, sure.”
I followed her to her office and she had me sit down. This couldn’t be good. She cleared her throat and had a hard time meeting my gaze; she was obviously just as uncomfortable as I was.
“So, with your personal life on the news and all of the media attention surrounding you, we think it’s appropriate for you to take some time off. With the nature of business here, we want to protect our client’s privacy and we just can't have reporters hanging outside of the office.”
I fought back the tears that welled up and nodded. She was right. The clinic didn’t need any more attention than it already received, and my presence would just be a distraction.
“I understand.”
“You’re an asset to us here, and your job will be waiting for you when all of this blows over.”
“Thank you, Pat.”
With as much confidence as I could muster, I held my head high and walked back out of the office, the eyes of everyone on me as I left. My phone rang once I got back into my car.
“Hello?”
“Girl, I just woke up and saw your ass on the news? What the hell did you do?”
I shook my head into the phone as Monet, my best friend, tore into me. I had to suck it up and listen to her because I needed to go to her place.
“I just got put on leave at work because of the media attention and reporters are flocking my apartment. I’m heading over to you now.”
As soon as I stepped in her apartment, she let me have it.
“I told you to stay away from that man. I told you this would happen. What the hell happened to your face?”
“Oh, did the news leave that part out? His wife busted in on us at the hotel last night and we got into a fight.”
It was barely nine in the morning, but I went to her fridge and pulled out a bottle of wine.
Monet’s face scrunched up. “Jesus, this shit is messy. Luke is scheduled for a press conference at ten to address the situation.”
“Well, I won’t be watching.”
I didn’t want to watch him apologize for wanting to be with me. I didn’t want to watch him say that he made a mistake. I knew in my heart that he wasn’t sorry for our affair, but he had to say what the public wanted to hear.
“I understand. And you know you can stay here as long as you need to.”
“Thanks, Nay.”
She watched me guzzle down my glass of wine in silence. As I refilled my glass, she suddenly burst out laughing.
“What?”
She gripped her sides and fought to stifle her laughter. “Babe, your tits are all over the internet right now!”
I slammed down the wine glass and stormed into her living room. I didn’t want to hear it, but I had nowhere else to go at the moment.
She must’ve noticed my lack of amusement at my newfound porn star status. She lifted her hands in surrender.
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.” She sat on the couch next to me and took a sip from my glass. “How are you feeling?”
“Like my life is over.”
“These political scandals come and go; soon enough, another guy will get in trouble and the world will forget all about you.”
“Hopefully that will happen soon.”
“Honestly, I’m glad it finally blew up in your face.”
I rolled my eyes. “Monet-”
“I don’t like seeing you hurt, but I told you a long time ago to end things with him. Now that it’s over, you can finally move on and have a real relationship.”
“That’s true. It will be nice to not have to sneak around anymore.”
Sneaking around like a whore was embarrassing, but it was worth it to me. If it meant I would get to spend time with Luke, I didn’t mind. But I always knew that it couldn’t go on forever.
My cell phone rang, and Monet knew who was calling just by looking on my face.
“Oh, no. Don’t you dare answer that! He’s caused you enough problems.”
She tried to snatch my phone away, but I jumped off the couch and pressed it to my ear.
“Hello?”
I heard Monet scoff behind me and mumble, “I’m going to go get ready for work.”
“Hey, Steph. How are you?”
Just hearing his voice instantly calmed my rattled nerves, although the feeling was temporary.
“I’m okay. They sent me home from work until this blows over. I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself.”
“Yeah, I have a press conference in a few minutes and then I’m going to lie low today. What do you think about meeting up?”
My heart skipped a beat at the thought of seeing him again, but then reality sank in.
I sighed. “We shouldn’t.”
“What did I tell you yesterday? We need to stick together through this mess.”
His words sounded good, but they were unrealistic. Why did we need to stick together? What was the end result? I shouldn’t have allowed our relationship to continue for as long as it did, and I certainly didn’t need to continue it after the mess we created.
I gripped the phone tightly as I said my final words. “No. I think our run is over, Luke. It’s time for you to focus on your family and rebound your career and I need to focus on getting my life together.”
“Stephanie, don’t do this-”
I nodded as if he could see me. “Goodbye, Luke.”
Monet rushed to my trembling body as soon as I hung up the phone. She rubbed my back and led me to the couch.
“It’s okay, baby. You did the right thing. I have to head out to work; are you going to be okay?”
“Yeah,” I said, although I really wasn’t sure.
Knowing that I wasn’t going to see him again ripped at my soul in a way I’d never experienced before. We’d been secretly seeing each other for almost three years. Even though I never had him completely, I couldn’t help but give myself to him one hundred percent.
We’d met during his last campaign w
hen he organized a rally at my job. His opponent wanted to cut funding for the clinic, but Luke held a big assembly to state his support for the services we provided for low income women. After the rally, he introduced himself to all the staff at the clinic. As soon as he shook my hand, my skin sizzled. Our eyes locked on each other for slightly too long, and the rest was history.
The last three years of my life revolved around waiting for his calls, thinking about him nonstop, and trying to think of new ways to please him when I saw him. And now, not only did I not have him, I had nothing.
After assuring Monet I wasn’t going to jump off of her balcony, she reluctantly went to work, leaving me alone. I went into her master bathroom and ran some hot bath water, refilling my wine glass as I waited.
I stepped into the seeping bath, the pain of the scorching water on my skin making me forget about the pain in my heart. I knocked back the third glass of wine and by the time I stepped out of the bath, I was intoxicated. It wasn’t even noon yet.
I was going to go stir crazy in Monet’s apartment. The best way for me to get over Luke would be to start seeing someone else. I didn’t think it was a good idea to try to start a new relationship in the midst of the drama, but there was one man I could always count on when I needed a temporary distraction.
I dialed his number and put the phone to my ear.
He chuckled when he answered. “Well, well, look who it is.”
“Hey, stranger.”
Besides Luke, David was the most stable relationship I was able to maintain over the years. And just like Luke, there were limits to our relationship. He only called me when he needed me, and I only called him when I needed a quick lay. We used each other for our bodies; it was an unspoken arrangement between us.
We’d known each other since high school, and we talked on and off throughout the years. I hadn’t spoken to him much since things with Luke and got serious.
“I see you’ve been causing a bit of trouble.” His deep, creamy voice sent a chill down my spine. Oh yeah, he was just what I needed.
“Yeah, I kind of have to hide out for a while. I could use a little company, though.”
Let Go (BWWM Interracial Romance) Page 2
