by Unknown
His words revived painful memories of the beating Slivkash had suffered when she’d slipped away from him to gather, shortly after Tierken’s patrol had first found her. Kira had stormed out of the Meeting Hall, her temper not helped by knowing that Farid was right. When she’d calmed, she’d gone back to apologise and, unexpectedly, Farid had hugged her, his sympathy bringing her close to tears.
‘I know it’s hard for you here, Kira,’ he said. ‘Why don’t you go to Kessom for a time? I’m sure Eris would welcome you, as would the friends you made there on your last visit.’
But Kira had shaken her head, knowing that the pledge she’d made to Eris – not to return in the last part of Eris’s life – was binding.
31
The celebrations in the Kashclan longhouse at Tresen and Laryia’s arrival lasted till dawn, although Tresen and Laryia had retired to their rooms well before then. The journey from Sarnia had exhausted Tresen, as had having to comfort Laryia in their travel through the trees. Given how cheerful she’d been on the journey, Tresen had been shocked by her distress in farewelling Tierken. She’d clung to her grim-faced brother and sobbed, while Tresen had stood uncomfortably by, fearing that Laryia regretted marrying him.
Laryia had assured him tearfully of her love many times since, but it hadn’t alleviated Tresen’s guilt at having taken her from her home, nor his anxiety for Kira, whose face had been filled with an even deeper despair as they’d ridden away.
Caledon sat with Miken throughout the evening, wanting to spend as much time as possible with the Kashclan leader. It was men like Miken and Kemrick, and perhaps the Morclan leader Marren, who would be instrumental in continuing the Terak–Tremen unification, and Caledon’s increasingly urgent star-thoughts suggested that the unification must continue.
Caledon knew that the northern victory over the Shargh had as much potential to seed war as it had to seed peace. Tierken had fought with the ruthlessness characteristic of the Terak line, an inclination for brutality kept dormant by the long peace, a peace that had also disguised the loss of the Terak’s healing part. Now, made strong by victory, and their hatred of the Shargh renewed, it would take little provocation for the Terak to sweep the Shargh settlements away, and even turn their arrows and swords on the Ashmiri.
Nowhere in the stars was the murder of innocents countenanced, even given that the child who ran, singing through the trees, could one day grow to be a warrior who killed. And there were certainly none among the Tremen – the healing part of the Terak – who would permit such slaughter. The breach between Kasheron and Terak – that had left both peoples like broken-winged birds, and which the coming together of Kira and Tierken had mended – mustn’t be allowed to fracture anew.
‘My bond-daughter seems to be settling well,’ said Miken, leaning closer to be heard above the music. ‘Tenerini and I are already fond of her.’
‘The Lady Laryia is well loved in the north,’ said Caledon, pondering once more the meaning of Tresen and Laryia’s union.
The joining of the Terak Feailner’s only sister with the man who must surely become the Tremen Leader was certainly more than chance. But whether Tresen and Laryia’s marriage was intended to strengthen the unifying effect of Kira and Tierken’s bonding, or replace it should it break, Caledon didn’t know.
‘Do you journey to your home in Talliel when you leave us, or visit the Tain King?’ asked Miken.
‘Talliel – most probably,’ said Caledon.
He missed his sister and her daughters, especially Pisa, and knew that his father fretted. However, potent dreams had lately invaded Caledon’s sleep, and he’d have to wait till he cleared the trees to see what the star-fire told. Only then would he know which way to turn his feet.
Six days after the start of autumn, and after Tierken should have returned, Kira thrust nuts and fruit into her pack and set off down the Rehan Valley. She wanted a ride that was long and testing enough to exhaust her sufficiently to sleep. So when she and the Guard reached the valley’s mouth, Kira let Brightwings have her head. The mare stretched out in a hard gallop and Kira stood in the stirrups and laughed as the wind rushed through her hair. The sky was gloriously blue and the grasses fragrant, making Kira feel as if she could go on forever, but the Guard were far behind, so in the end she checked the mare, intending to circle back. She didn’t want to give Farid cause to reprimand her again.
At that moment, Kira saw movement ahead. She glanced back anxiously, but her Guard were nowhere to be seen, most probably still beyond the last rise, or the one before that. Whoever it was ahead, it was unlikely to be Shargh, she reassured herself, and then the movement resolved itself into a group of silver horses and she smiled in delight. It was Tierken’s patrol – at last.
She urged Brightwings on, not halting till she reached him. ‘Welcome home, my Lord,’ she said, bowing as his men did.
But Tierken’s expression was stony.
Farid’s messages told of Kira working in the Wastes, despite her undertakings not to, while the messengers told of the Feailner’s woman laughing with the Keeper, both late at night and early in the morning, the inference clear that she enjoyed his company in the time between as well.
It didn’t matter whether Tierken believed it true or false – the insinuation undermined Kira’s already tenuous position. And now she greeted him with all the impudent freedom of a Caru woman – loose on the plain, the Guard who always accompanied a Lady of the Domain glaringly absent.
‘Where are your Guard?’ he demanded.
‘Just a little behind. I wanted to give Brightwings –’
‘If they’re so far behind they can’t be seen, they’re worse than useless. My orders were that you not go anywhere without them.’
Tierken’s position as Feailner, and the silence of the watching men, demanded Kira bow her head and beg his pardon, but fury built instead. She’d spent two lonely moons longing for his return, and now he hadn’t even the grace to greet her.
‘You’re confusing me with a Terak, my Lord,’ she said, using the title ironically now. ‘I’m not a Terak, and I’m not yours to command.’
With that, she wrenched Brightwings around and galloped back towards Sarnia, passing the disconcerted Guard and only slowing when it was too dark to see. The Guard still hadn’t caught up by the time she’d reached the Domain, and by then her temper had given way to shame.
A Terak Feailner must always be that in front of his men, Caledon had once warned her.
Kira hurried up to her rooms, wanting only to crawl into bed, but she bathed, using the soap she knew Tierken liked, and brushed out her hair in front of the fire. The only way she could make amends was to beg his pardon when he came, and pledge never to defy him in public again. The patrol shouldn’t be too far behind, she thought as she settled at the table, but the fire burned low and the next thing she was aware of was her head resting on her numb hands, and Niria setting her breakfast down.
‘You should take your rest in your bed, Lady,’ she chided.
‘Is the Feailner in the Meeting Hall?’ asked Kira, trying to get the circulation in her hands going again.
‘The Feailner told me in the last night that he and the Keeper would breakfast after they’d been to the Illian Quarter,’ said Niria, pouring Kira a cup of cotzee. ‘Is there aught else I can get for you?’ she asked.
‘No . . . I thank you,’ said Kira.
Niria bustled out but Kira remained at the table, staring into space. While she could understand that Tierken was angry, the fact that he had shunned her, after being away more than two moons, frightened her. She’d believed that once the fighting was finished, they would have time together – but she’d been wrong. And she’d believed that Tierken would come to trust her, in spite of his contempt for bonding – but she’d been wrong about that too. The love that had brought them together was fracturing – but they weren’t drifting away from each other, they were being torn apart by violent argument after argument. And Kira didn’t know h
ow the destruction of their love could be stopped. Even marriage wouldn’t mend the breach, she knew, for at last she saw that she could never be what Tierken wanted.
It was near midday before Tierken had finished going through the trading records with Farid, and they sat together over mugs of ale. The rebuilding of the southern Rehan settlements had been completed in Tierken’s absence, and the houses in Kasheron’s Quarter progressed well. All was in order and further advanced than he’d dared hope possible, and his relationship with the trader leaders also sound. In fact, his feailnership would be at its most settled and successful, if it weren’t for the antics of his ‘woman’.
‘At the new moon, I’ll take a patrol north,’ said Tierken.
‘So soon?’ said Farid in surprise.
‘It’s near nine moons since I’ve been that way, and I need check the southern Ashkal and reacquaint the herders there with their Feailner.’
‘I meant that you won’t have been back long,’ said Farid. ‘Kira missed you terribly this last time.’
‘I’ll be instructing her on her responsibilities in the Domain before I go. You and Mouras have enough to do without taking on her duties as well. And I’ll be speaking to Kira of other matters, one of which I must raise with you now.’
Farid glanced at his face and set down his mug.
‘We both know how the gossip runs in Sarnia, Farid, and that the loose tongues would have had you and Laryia married a dozen times. But Laryia’s reputation remained intact because Laryia knew how to conduct herself. Kira doesn’t. Thus far I’ve been patient, but there’s a limit to how much I can tolerate when the talk on the street suggests she shares your bed.’
‘Tierken –’ began Farid, shocked.
‘No doubt there were reasons why Kira chose to take her last meal of the day and her breakfast with you, in my absence. But that, along with her refusal to marry me, her inappropriate dress, her working like a hand-trader in the Wastes and going when and where she pleases without Domain Guard is enough to make her position in the Domain untenable. I need hardly point out that such innuendo undermines the authority you must have if you are to administer Sarnia effectively during my absence. Therefore I’m asking you not to spend time with Kira alone, ensuring that a server is present if you must speak to her, or that you meet with her only in public places, such as the courtyard.’
‘Tierken, I –’
‘I’ve asked Niria to send Kira here at midday, and will speak to her of this and other matters. Is there anything else we need to discuss, Keeper?’
‘No, Feailner.’
‘Then we’ll meet on the morrow to go over the provisioning of the next patrol.’
32
Tierken still didn’t greet her when Kira entered the Meeting Hall at midday. He just motioned her to a seat and began outlining the duties that Laryia had performed as Lady of the Domain. Even when she interrupted him to beg his pardon for her behaviour on the plain, his demeanour remained unchanged, shrugging off her words as if they were unimportant. He seemed perfectly calm, and his indifference added to Kira’s belief that his love for her was no more. Panic threatened to overwhelm her, and she struggled to focus on his words.
‘The present need is for you to understand your responsibilities in the Domain before my next patrol,’ he was saying.
‘Your next patrol?’ exclaimed Kira. ‘You’ve only just returned from the last one and that was more than two moons!’
‘That was an escort, not a patrol,’ said Tierken impatiently. ‘Despite not being Terak, I thought you understood that a Terak Feailner’s duties include ensuring the security and wellbeing of all Terak lands and people, not just those enclosed by the wall.’
‘And what am I supposed to do in your absence?’ asked Kira.
‘Apart from maintaining the smooth running of the Domain, you can spend time repairing the damage you’ve done to your reputation.’
‘Damage?’
‘I’m not a herder, Kira, nor a woodcutter, nor a patrolman. If I were, it wouldn’t matter to Sarnia if you dressed in breeches and wandered about alone, if you married or refused to, if you took lovers –’
‘If I took lovers?’ gasped Kira, gripping the table to steady herself.
‘You’re naive if you think that joining Farid in the Meeting Hall last thing at night, and emerging first thing in the morning, is not going to fuel gossip that you share his bed.’
‘You think that Farid and I are lovers?’
‘It’s what Sarnia thinks! I’ve spoken to Farid already and he understands the need to protect your reputation as well as his own. You’ve been here over eight moons. It’s time you became –’
‘Terak?’ asked Kira. ‘I warned you that I would always be a Tremen. I was honest about that.’
‘I’ve arranged for Mouras to meet with you here later this day,’ continued Tierken, ignoring her outburst. ‘I need go inspect the new paving in Kasheron’s Quarter now.’
‘I’m to meet the Room Master alone? Aren’t you afraid I’ll take him as a lover?’
‘If there’s anything in Mouras’s instructions you don’t understand, you can ask me on my return.’
Mouras was kindly, but he spoke exceptionally slowly and Kira couldn’t concentrate. The afternoon dragged, and as soon as she was able Kira muttered an excuse about feeling unwell and returned to her rooms. It wasn’t entirely untrue, for she did feel queasy again, no doubt partly due to her churning thoughts.
She took to her bed early, knowing that Tierken wouldn’t come, and woke the next morning to the sounds of Niria building the fire in the eating-room. Kira knew she should rise, bathe and change, but she felt too miserable. Instead she curled into a ball and forced herself to think rationally about her exchange with Tierken the day before.
There certainly continued to be curiosity about her in Sarnia, but apart from the occasion when Rosham had spat at her, she’d noticed no disparaging glances, and heard no sly whisperings or muttered insults. And she certainly hadn’t noticed any innuendo suggesting that she shared Farid’s bed. It was the same when she healed in the Haelen. Those who sought aid were genuinely respectful, and grateful afterwards.
Niria was hovering in the doorway. ‘I’m sorry to disturb you, Lady, but the Feailner asked that you breakfast with him in the Meeting Hall, and that was a little time ago now. I’ve laid the gowns the Lady Laryia traded for you on the chest.’
Kira leapt out of bed, barely pausing to splash water on her face, before hurrying along the balcony. She was surprised to find Farid there too, but returned the Keeper’s smile as she joined them at the table.
‘Did Niria neglect to bring you the gowns?’ asked Tierken, eyeing her crumpled shirt.
‘No, she –’
‘Then why are you wearing Kessomi garb?’
‘It’s Tremen,’ said Kira, bracing wearily for another fight.
‘We’ll wait for you while you change,’ said Tierken.
Kira glanced from Farid’s sympathetic face to Tierken’s hard one, and some part of her knew that they had reached an ending, as inevitable as the death of early shoots under late snow.
‘I don’t intend to change, Tierken,’ she said. ‘As I told you on the plain, I’m Tremen, not Terak.’
Farid moved uncomfortably and Tierken’s jaw clenched.
‘No response to that, Feailner?’ asked Kira, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice. ‘But then, I can understand that you don’t want the unpleasantness of an argument inflicted on Farid, on your best friend – who you don’t trust with me!’
Tierken seized her arm, half wrenching her over the table as his other hand swung back. Her chair crashed to the floor and Farid gave a warning cry, but Kira was aware of nothing more than the ring on Tierken’s hand catching the light. You will obey me in the end, her father had said, after the blow.
But there was no blow. Tierken released her and Kira staggered backwards. Farid was on his feet, but Kira kept her eyes on Tierken. Then she b
owed low, because it was what you did when you left a Feailner, went steadily to the door and closed it quietly behind her. The same calmness stayed with her as she filled her pack with every bit of food she could find, thrust her sword down the side, and folded the map on top.
The calmness even remained as she went to the stables and saddled Brightwings, then clipped a full waterskin to the harness.
‘Where would you ride?’ asked Storsil.
‘Just to the end of the Rehan, there’s no need for you to bring food or water,’ she said.
Birds rose from the Steelwater, and when she reached the houses, people waved and Kira waved back. But it was as if someone else sat astride the mare, watched the shadows lengthen and listened to the hoofbeats of the following Guard. When she reached the end of the Rehan she stopped and turned to them.
‘I thank you for your care during my stay in the north,’ she said.
Then she dug her heels into Brightwings’ side and the mare leapt away, Kira urging her to greater and greater speed till the ground was a blur. The Guard would follow at least until dark and probably through the night, but in the end, their lack of food would drive them back to Sarnia. She should have at least a three-day start on any pursuit. She clenched her teeth and crouched lower.
Lamps burned in the Domain when Guard Leader Tharin sought out Tierken in the Meeting Hall. Having spent an uncomfortable day in Tierken’s company, Farid was glad of the interruption, and he took a turn around the room, stretching his legs while Tierken read the message.
‘Eris is dangerously ill,’ said Tierken to Farid, then turned to the Guard. ‘Fetch the Lady Kira and have the horses saddled. We leave at once.’
‘The Lady still rides in the Rehan Valley,’ said Tharin.