by Bi Feiyu
She responded with unusual vigor: "Do you think those two ounces of hanging flesh are all I want from you?" She meant well, but that stung even more, since it implied that she'd given up on his "two ounces of flesh."
But Wei did not let his dejection show. At moments like this a man must be resilient; he had to carry on and look energetic. He appeared to be more cheerful and outgoing, which was why he enjoyed chatting up the women at school. He favored topics with a sexual undertone as if that were the only way he could show he still had it and that nothing was amiss. But when he was alone, he knew he really didn't have to wear himself out acting like that. No one would know anyway, particularly now that he no longer had extramarital affairs. Of course, he couldn't even if he wanted to. So who would know? No loss of face there. Still, while Wei could control his thoughts, he could not keep his tongue from wagging in front of the women teachers. It felt good to talk about it even if he could no longer do it.
To his surprise, his loose talk turned out to be a real blunder this time. Doesn't Teacher Qi have a sense of humor? I'll have to talk to her about that.
Qi's husband showed up at his door that night with murder in his eyes, which were as red as a rabbit's. He held a kitchen knife in each hand, one big and one small. His arms shook and his lips trembled. Wei knew what this was all about the moment he opened the door, and he smirked inwardly at the sight of Qi's husband.
What do you think you're doing? You're out of your league here. You want to play games? Well, you've come to the right place.
Smiling, he said, "Little Du, why are you being so formal when visiting a colleague? And there's no need to bring gifts. Come in, come in and have a seat." Draping one arm over Du's shoulder, Wei escorted him inside and shut the door. Then he took the knives from him, laid them on the table, and offered him a cigarette while he brewed some tea.
Wei sat down, crossed his legs, and started chatting in an amicable tone. He told Du that his wife was doing a good job at school and that the responses from other comrades were encouraging; everyone liked and respected her.
After that, Wei changed the subject and told Little Du about plans for the school. "Construction of a natatorium and an all-weather athletic field and the renovation of the library's second floor will all begin next semester. Everything is moving in the right direction. Since society is taking great strides toward progress, we have to do the same. Everyone knows that making no progress is the same as backpedaling, a truth that can be applied to any place and time."
Wei, who had not occupied a leadership position for a long time, was surprised to discover that talking like this made him feel like a leader again. He had regained the tone and gestures of an official. But the crux of the matter was that a leadership mentality had come back—the damn thing had returned.
For his part, Little Du acted respectfully. Wei was somewhat unfocused, but that did not affect his speech, which became more lucid and decisive as he went along; his professional level had not fallen, and he was now sure that he could be entrusted with leadership work at the section level. Little by little, Little Du's anger subsided; he had lost his righteous edge and began nodding his head in response.
Finally, Wei stood up, smoothed the front and back of his jacket, and picked up the knives, which he wrapped in a copy of People's Daily before handing them back.
"Stop by whenever you like, and next time no gifts. There's no need for that." Du was about to say something, but was stopped by Wei, who added with a smile, "My door is always open."
After seeing Little Du off, Wei turned and saw his wife, her face contorted by a sneer. He returned to reality as the illusion of being a section-level leader evaporated. He felt like explaining but didn't know where to start, so, with a nod, he said, "It's all right. I cracked a joke about Teacher Qi this afternoon. Everything's fine."
Her face stayed frozen in the sneer. "I know everything's fine. How could I not know? You may not be good at much, but you'll never have a 'lifestyle issue' now."
Wei's face darkened at her insinuation. "Tan Meihua!" he shouted.
She ignored the tone of rebuke as she turned and went into the bedroom, closing the door with a final comment, "A dog never gets out of the habit of eating shit."
Deeply hurt, Wei Xiangdong felt a deep loathing for Tan Meihua and for his home life. But he was Wei Xiangdong, a man who knew how to turn grief into vigor by redoubling his devotion to work.
Wei had requisitioned an extra-long flashlight with added weight and heightened brightness, and every night after nine-thirty he took it along to inspect the athletic field, the brush behind the bleachers, the art studio, the music room, the grove of trees to the left of the laboratory, the dining hall, and the area around the pond. For the most part, he seldom had to turn on his flashlight, for little escaped his keen eyes, even in the dark. He'd developed a sort of sixth sense so that most of the time, even when there was no sign or evidence, his innate perception helped him identify a spot where a couple was kissing or touching in the dark. Once he verified it, his flashlight would snap on, sending a blinding searchlight across the night sky and nailing the suspects to the ground. More precisely, the white light acted like a loudspeaker or a hood descending upon the suspicious objects. The dark mass on the ground would separate immediately to reveal itself—a panicky boy and girl exposed by the powerful flashlight.
As a whole, the undercover school security team, represented by Wang Yuyang, was a functioning aspect of Wei Xiangdong's project. Secret lovers or signs of a budding love on campus did not escape his attention. The only blemish on his record was his failure to catch any of the transgressors in the act. If he ever did, he would not stop at punishing one couple to warn the others, or as the saying goes, "Kill a chicken to scare the monkeys."
If he caught one, he'd punish one, and if he caught two, he'd punish two. Where romance was concerned, Wei was pigheaded to the point of obsession. Viewed from a certain angle, this was not loathing; it could even be seen as a kind of affection, a fondness. He wanted to catch them, and he wanted to punish them, expose them in broad daylight.
Yuyang worked hard, but the quality of her work was low. Her reports were generally worthless and covered only trivial matters, to Wei's disappointment. On the other hand, he liked her more than the others. Why? Because the intelligence she gathered was generally accurate and undiluted. She never used her power to serve her own interests or to attack or to exact revenge. This was a work ethic deserving of emulation. Some of Wei's undercover agents performed much worse than she. Zhang Juanjuan of Section One of the class of '82, for instance, or Li Jun of Section Four of the same year were highly problematic. Zhang Juanjuan would send in false reports on anyone she didn't like and abused her power for personal gain. What displeased Wei most were the lies. She had once given a vivid description of a romantic liaison between so-and-so and so-and-so, who "sneak out to the grove every night for a quarter of an hour."
Wei had lain in wait at the grove twice, each time emerging empty-handed. It turned out that Zhang had fought with the girl in question and had reported her to gain revenge. That had to be stopped. So he called her into the duty office, only to have her stick to her story, insisting that she'd reported the facts. Teacher Wei had not gotten there in time. For the first time, he lost his temper with an undercover agent and felt like slapping her. Zhang's eyes reddened. She even managed to shed a few tears, as if suffering a great injustice.
By comparison, Yuyang was much better. For Wei, her sense of duty was secondary to her playful, loveable side. He'd always thought that she was a simple girl, like the knot on an elm tree, but in fact, she could be a lot of fun, even a riot when she shed her timid self.
This he discovered one evening behind the library when he found her playing with a Pekinese dog belonging to Teacher Gao. It was a furry, pudgy animal with short legs that made jumping difficult. But Yuyang knew what to do. Teasing the dog by putting her finger in its mouth and pulling it out over and over, she leaped into t
he air, higher and higher. This excited the dog and it stood up on his hind legs and tried to bite her fingers. Quite a sight. The dog looked like a clumsy but obedient child. When he licked her fingertips, she let out an exaggerated, energetic scream as if there were no one else around. And, of course, no one else was around. Yuyang kept at it over and over, as did the dog; neither was bored by the monotony of the game. They must have been playing for quite a while before Wei spotted them because Yuyang had taken off her winter jacket and had on only a thin sweater.
The sweater, which was too small, seemed to wrap itself tightly around her. What caught his attention was not the size of the sweater but her curves, her vigor, and her vitality. Though not tall, Yuyang was well developed; her breasts moved in a lovely and compliant way, as if they were too dim-witted to know what was good for them. Her bangs were so soaked with sweat that they stuck to her forehead in a shiny crescent.
Wei moved closer, clasped his hands behind him, and squinted at Yuyang and the dog, his eyes brimming with tenderness. Unaware of his presence, Yuyang kept lifting, leaping, and screaming. And as the game continued, she got bolder and let her fingers remain in the dog's mouth, which prompted Wei to blurt out, "Careful or he'll bite."
Startled, she withdrew her fingers, scraping them against the dog's teeth in the process. They began to bleed. But she paid no attention to the wound; instead, she spun around and stood at attention in front of Wei.
From her bright red face, he could tell that she was nervous and ill at ease. Her shining eyes darted around, unsure of where to focus.
"Just look at you," he scolded, but with a hint of affection in his voice. He came up and took her hand; after a cursory glance at the wound, he led her in the direction of the infirmary. The dog, obviously unwilling to let her go, trotted along behind them like a ball of yarn. Wei turned and gave the dog a kick, sending him somersaulting through the air before hitting the ground. With a series of loud yelps, the dog twisted itself around and waddled off.
At the infirmary, Wei picked up a cotton ball soaked in rubbing alcohol.
"Be brave," he said. "This will sting."
Yuyang looked up at him, not knowing what to do or say so she did as he said. He kept sucking in air, as if each dab were sending a sharp pain deep into his heart and into his mouth instead of hurting her. After taking care of her wound, he looked out the window just before he slapped her on the rear.
"Now be a good girl, and stop playing with that dog," he said. Then he mumbled, "What a silly girl." He sounded like her father, or maybe an uncle, but definitely someone from Wang Family Village.
"Now be a good girl, and stop playing with that dog." "What a silly girl." These two brief comments left a powerful impression on Yuyang, and she was deeply touched.
Shortly before the winter break, something extraordinary happened to this "silly girl"—she became pregnant. Yuyang herself was unaware of it and would never have known if Wei hadn't called her into the duty office. The moment she walked in the door she could tell that something was wrong. She'd been treated well by Wei from the beginning; he'd never frowned at her, and the lines around his eyes had felt like sunshine to her.
But things were different this time. He sat in his chair with a stern look, signaling with his chin for her to shut the door and sit down.
She did as she was told, and her heart filled with anxiety. She wasn't really afraid because she was secure in the knowledge that Teacher Wei was fond of her. Thinking she'd forgotten to report something important, she asked cautiously, "Has something happened on campus?"
Wei came right to the point. "Something has happened to you."
"No," she said, feeling confused. "I'm fine."
Wei slapped his hand down on the desk and produced a letter. "One of your schoolmates has written to expose you, saying that you are involved with someone and that you have gotten yourself pregnant," he said.
Yuyang's mouth fell open. She stared blankly for a moment as she tried to comprehend what he was saying. When she did, she nearly fainted.
"Who said that?" she demanded.
"I need to investigate the allegation," he replied calmly. The conversation could not continue because the tune "The Well Water at the Frontier is Clear and Pure," sung by Li Guyi, was blaring through the PA system. It seemed both far off and close by at the same time. In Li Guyi's falsetto, the words were like sighs or labored breathing, and the singer sounded worn out from expressing so much emotion. This created a strange atmosphere in the room, as the words started to seem both progressively distant and increasingly distinct.
"We can go to the hospital, or I can check it out myself," Wei said.
Yuyang lowered her head, a welter of thoughts racing through her mind, as she tried to decide what to do. In the end, being checked by Teacher Wei seemed the better option, since he'd been so nice and would not bring false accusations against a good person like her. So she carefully drew the curtains and walked boldly up to him.
Wei was still seated, but he'd turned sideways and had opened his legs wide like a welcoming bay. At the last moment Yuyang's courage left her, and she clutched the cord holding up her pants, unable to untie it. With an air of official indifference, Wei said, "We can always go to the hospital."
His words, hinting at compromise, calmed her mind, yet the blood rushed to her face. True gold does not fear fire, and an upright body never fears a slanting shadow. Go ahead and check.
Standing between his legs, she untied her pants and draped the cord around her neck to let Wei press his hand against her belly and move it around slowly. Assured that this was a scientific search for the truth and confident that she knew what that truth was, she had nothing to fear.
Yuyang was innocent—that was proven beyond all doubt. In the spirit of never sparing a single culprit or falsely accusing an innocent person, Wei gave it his all, body and soul, and conducted a thorough inspection that exhausted him; he was sweating and breathing hard. Fortunately the final result allowed Yuyang to breathe a sigh of relief when he patted her buttocks and said, "Good girl." She was not convinced until he repeated the words, "good girl."
As she stood there, she felt like crying, for what can be more comforting than the trust of the organization? As she retied her pants, she concentrated on trying to guess who had written that shameless, slanderous letter. Had it not been for Teacher Wei, the consequences would have been unthinkable. Even though he'd been a bit rough and had hurt her more than she wanted to admit, the end result was worth all of her forbearance. Now, like Agatha Christie, she began to analyze, deduce, and evaluate the people in her class and discovered that every boy and girl was a suspect. But who could it be? She vowed to find and expose that despicable person.
Yuyang may have been exonerated by the inspection, but the one who truly came out a winner was Wei Xiangdong, who experienced an unexpected consequence. While rubbing Yuyang's belly, he discovered, to his amazement, that a certain appendage had regained its life and revived—and with that he recovered the ability and courage to conquer all difficulties. There is justice in the world, after all; heaven rewards those who work hard.
The elated Wei tried to show off in bed that night but got nowhere. He had been able to do it earlier, why not now? The damned thing was importunely shameless—betraying and splitting him once again. What a tragedy!
As he rested the back of his head on his folded arms, Wei's dejection seemed to reach into the marrow of his bones and send a searing pain straight to his heart. Suddenly distracted, he could not get Yuyang out of his mind. From that point on, she became his obsession.
The winter break was three weeks long, but to Wei Xiangdong it seemed endless. Listless and lethargic, he was reminded that he was neither man nor woman, but had become a true third sex. Now that the students were away, the campus seemed forlorn. It was bad enough that he couldn't see Yuyang; what made it worse was that there was no one to report to him or to expose others, no one to order around, and no work to take charge of. Life
lost its appeal, and he found it difficult to go on.
Worse yet, the weather was awful beyond words, with nonstop snowfall and days too cold for the snow to melt. The packed snow was a terrible thing, the reflected light inexplicably souring Wei's mood. The light turned night into day, bringing everything out into the open: no secrets, no hints, and no suggestiveness. Even the normally dark grove was exposed and transparent. Flashlight in hand, Wei roamed aimlessly in the snow, feeling utterly bored. The nights were worse than the days, since there were no more dark corners where people could engage in unsavory acts. He sighed and headed home.
The campus came to life once the winter break ended. Nearly all of the students had put on weight; the boys were heavier than before, the girls even more so. Their faces were a size larger than they'd been only weeks earlier. Rosy, flushed faces told the experienced teachers that the girls had eaten and slept themselves into a fleeting plumpness that would disappear within days.
With the extra weight, the girls looked healthier, and the improved skin tones made them prettier than ever. But when they lost the excess weight, they'd no longer be the scrawny girls of before. Those days would be over. They say that a girl's looks change at eighteen. That seemed to be the case at the school. But this could have been the sixteenth or seventeenth change on the road to the transformation from little girls into women. Their eyes and the way they carried themselves displayed a new temperament, and this made their metamorphosis complete.
But not Yuyang. She actually had lost weight, for she hadn't eaten or slept well over the winter break. A movie played continuously in her head, one with unspeakable scenes. She kept feeling that her lower body was exposed and that a hand was stuck to it. She tried to blot it out of her mind, but the hand had the unerring ability to find her like a shadow that cannot be severed, not even with a knife. It found every opportunity to reach out and slither over her body like a snake. Back in the duty room, she hadn't felt the humiliation, but shame reared its ugly head once the break began and she had returned home. Lacking the courage to discuss it with anyone, she could only bury it deep inside. But humiliation is a strange thing. The deeper you bury it, the smaller its teeth, and yet its bite is sharper.
