"I want to do it again," he said.
"We should sometime," I agreed.
"Sometime is so noncommittal."
"Maybe I can call the studio and get on your books," I said.
He smiled. "Maybe you should."
"Okay then, I will."
"That seems like it'll be too long," he said.
"Are you booked?" I asked.
"Really booked," he said. "I'm busy for like the next two months."
"I guess I better just call and take the first available."
"What if you're already back in Hartford by then?" he asked, since we had discussed the possibility of Izzy and me moving back home after Macy and Ethan got married.
I knew Drake was baiting me to see how I'd react to him saying I'd be back in Hartford, but I called his bluff. I shrugged. "Even if I'm living back there, I'd drive to the city for a photo shoot with the famous Drake Salinger."
He stared at me like he was trying to figure out what to say next, and I smiled and tilted my head at him. "I'll see you soon," I said.
"Today?" he asked. "I have some work to do later this afternoon, but I have the morning off. Let's go get some breakfast. You and Iz can come with me to the studio, and I'll take your picture before I have to work." He paused and shrugged. "You said you have the day off," he said.
"I thought you just said it would take months to fit into your schedule."
"That's if you talk to my assistant."
"I guess I'd rather talk to you, then," I said. I wanted to have the strength to refrain from falling for this guy, but I just didn't.
"If it was up to me, you and Isabel would meet me in a little bit for an early lunch, and then I'll take your picture before I go to work."
"Then, that's what we'll do," I said.
He gave me a satisfied smile, and we both hesitated, knowing I had to get back inside.
"This is weird, but I don't have your number," I said.
"Meet me at my studio at ten-thirty. Your sister has the address. We can exchange numbers later."
"What should we wear?"
"Clothes."
I narrowed my eyes.
"Just be yourself," he said.
"I am myself."
"Good."
"You're yourself, too."
He smiled. "Yep, I sure am."
"And I'm gonna see you in a few hours," I said.
"Yep, you are."
"Okay, so bye."
He smiled. "Bye," he said. He just stood there and gave me that easy smile.
"I'm gonna kiss you again," I said. I awkwardly rocked forward onto my toes, popping up to place a kiss on his cheek. I hesitated for a second wondering whether I should kiss his cheek or his mouth, but I went with his cheek. He smiled at me briefly like he thought I was cute before ducking to kiss my mouth. His lips were soft and warm, but he kissed me swiftly before gently pinching my arm in a gesture of goodbye.
"I'll see you in a while," he said.
"Okay."
Without another word, I turned and headed to my apartment. Drake got to the elevator at the same time that I got to my door, and we looked back at each other just as I headed inside. I waved at him, and he waved back, and off I went to my bedroom.
Macy was sitting on the edge of my bed, looking down at Isabel, who was still curled up in her spot. She sat up when I came in the room.
"Whewe did you go?" she asked.
It had only been a minute since Drake's mouth was on mine, and in the rush of it all, I had forgot to consider that my daughter's first words when I got back would likely be to ask me where I had been.
"I went down the hall for a minute. To talk to someone."
"Who did you talk to?" she asked the question so point blank, that I answered with the truth without even thinking about it.
"Drake."
"Did you talk to Dwake?" she asked, sitting up even straighter, and peering into the living room.
"He's not here, but yes, I did, and he said he's gonna take our picture."
"He is?" Macy asked.
I nodded.
"Today?" Isabel asked.
I nodded. "In just a few hours. We have to get dressed soon.
Isabel squealed, letting out the sound that I'd been holding in since we converged in the hallway for a kiss that was at least as memorable as I imagined it would be. I felt an ache in my chest at the memory of it. It was a longing feeling, the likes of which I had never experienced.
"What awe you laughing at?" Isabel asked.
"Nothing," I said. "I was laughing at myself."
"Did Drake really tell you he was taking pictures for free?" Macy asked. It was probably the last thing I expected her to ask, so I glanced at her with a curious expression. She shrugged. "I just wanted to make sure he said that because he's big-time now. He gave me and Ethan the friends and family rate for our engagement photos. It was a fraction of what he normally charges, and even still it was like…" She paused and hesitated, trying to remember how much they had paid Drake.
"Well, I think he was planning on doing it for free," I said. "But now I feel bad. I guess I should go expecting to give him something. I should at least buy his lunch."
"Oh, yes, I would love to buy Dwake's wunch," Isabel said. She spread her arms and fell onto her pillow lavishly, like buying Drake's lunch was the most luxurious thing she could think of.
Macy reached out and tickled Isabel. "Where are you gonna get enough money to take Drake to lunch, you little monkey? Did you get a joooob?"
Isabel giggled. "No silly, I went to my… (giggling) I meant my mom will… (giggling) I will tell my moooom to buy Dwake's wunch."
"I don't know if your mom wants to spend her paycheck feeding that big ugly oaf," Macy said. She was intentionally pushing Isabel's buttons, and it worked. Isabel stared at her aunt with a stunned expression. "I'm just picking," Macy said. "I love Drake."
"I love Dwake, too," Isabel said.
I glanced at Macy and she looked at me with wide eyes and mouthed the words, "I need to talk to you."
I was not the type of person who liked to put off a conversation when it was within my ability to go ahead and have it, so I furrowed my eyebrows at her. "About what?'" I mouthed.
She shifted her head almost imperceptibly, telling me I should join her in the living room.
I looked at Isabel with a smile. "I'm going to go tell Aunt Macy 'bye' since she's leaving for her race. We can still wake it up easy for a little bit before we get dressed. I'll be right back to lay by you."
"Okay," she said. "Bye Aunt Macy, love you, hope you have fun."
"Hope you have fun, too, peanut." Macy said as we made our way to the living room.
"We will have fun," Isabel called, "And I will show you the pictuwes we take."
"Okay, great. Love you!" Macy called.
Isabel was returning the sentiment as we walked into the living room. I leveled my sister with a serious expression. "What?" I asked since it was the first thing you should say when someone says we need to talk.
"I think you should both just take a minute and step back a little bit," she said.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means I see how Isabel is acting about Drake, and I see how you are acting, too. I can tell he kissed you out there, Tab, and I feel like I need to just remind you…" she trailed off looking at me with an expression that said I should know what she was about to say.
"Remind me of what?" I said with an annoyed look on my face.
She let out a frustrated groan. "That Drake has dated a few different… several different girls since I've known him. There's been quite a few."
"So, what are you saying? That he uses women? That he can't be trusted?"
"No, I'm not saying that. I'm friends with Drake. I'm the one who brought him around."
"Do you think I can't take care of myself after all this stuff at work?" I asked, somewhat defensively.
"No. That's not what I'm saying at all. I'm just saying�
� uhhh, I see how Isabel's acting, and I see how you're acting, Tabitha. I didn't expect either of you to fall for him like that."
I shook my head at her. "Nobody's falling for anyone."
Chapter 10
I was so angry and hurt by Macy's warning that I went straight into the apartment and composed a note to J.R. (After taking a few minutes to wake it up easy with Isabel, of course.) Macy's warning had nothing to do with J.R., but it had me feeling like I needed to take up for myself in some way, so I sat down and wrote an email.
J.R.,
I am taking the next few days off. I'll be back for my shift on Wednesday, and I'll handle covering the ones I'll miss between now and then. I will finish out the next two weeks, but this is my official notice. I am leaving the company. I have served Patterson & Ray faithfully for the past 6+ years, and I would like to ask that my letter of referral reflect that. All I need is a statement or two about my efforts on the job, which have been exemplary. I wanted to come to you, but if it's too much to ask, I can go to Michael. I can go to him with everything. Thank you for your time and consideration on this matter, and I wish you and your family all the best.
Tabitha
I read it twice, but still couldn’t make myself press send. I decided to give myself a few minutes to think about it. She hadn't meant for it to be that way, but Macy's words of warning about Drake had me feeling weak and out of control of my life. It was for this reason that I wanted to press send immediately and start making changes… but I didn't.
I closed my laptop and headed into the living room where I found Isabel, watching cartoons. I had given her some fruit, but there was now an empty plate on the coffee table.
"We gotta pack our suitcases," I said, coming into the room.
Isabel popped onto her knees wearing a huge grin. "Whewe awe we goin'?"
"Nana and PopPop's."
"We awe, today?" Isabel asked. Her voice was so curious that she almost squeaked getting the words out.
"Yep," I said. "We need to get dressed and pack our bags."
She had been smiling, but it faded. "I fought we was goin' to Dwake's," she said.
"I was just thinking about that," I said. "We can either pack now and take our luggage with us to Drake's on our way out of town and just leave straight from there. Or we could just call him and tell him we changed plans and decided to go out of town." I shrugged. "He'd understand. We could do the pictures another time."
"I think we should go ovew thewe on ouw way to PopPop and Nan's. Dwake will be happy fow us to come ovew. Plus, you said you wanted to take a pictuwe of me while I still have on my cast."
"Okay," I said. "We'll go to Drake's, and we'll leave straight from there."
She smiled and nodded at me, and I reached down to ruffle her hair. I wished I could be totally in the moment with her, but the truth of it was I was completely preoccupied with whether or not I should send that email to J.R. I was so mad at myself for not being able to fully give my attention to this precious little girl that I marched into my bedroom, opened my computer, and pressed send.
I regretted it instantly. There's one thing we all know about email, though. It's a sad but true fact that you can't do anything to unsend them once they're sent.
I was so full of nervous and anxious energy that I got both of us packed and got myself dressed while simultaneously making phone calls and working from my computer to cover my shifts at work.
Those couple of hours passed in an absolute blur, and the next thing I knew, it was just after 10:30, and I was standing at the door of Drake's studio with luggage in hand. It felt odd seeing Drake after what Macy had said to me. I certainly didn't feel like having my picture made, but I was experiencing guilt as a parent, and Isabel was extremely excited about it, so there I was.
"What's all this?" Drake asked, smiling as we came inside with our bags. "Wardrobe changes?"
"We'we goin' to spend fwee nights at PopPop and Nana's house aftew this. And I have a tweat fow Bingo in my bag. He's Nana's dog. And I'm gonna get my cast off next week. We will be back fwom PopPop's by then."
Drake looked at me as if wanting me to translate. Isabel had been excited and was speaking quickly. He had obviously missed some of it.
"We're going to Connecticut for a few nights," I said. I tried to smile, but I had so many emotions going on that it didn't come easy.
Drake could see that something was bothering me, and his expression changed to one of concern.
"I put in my notice at Patterson," I said. "I emailed them earlier." I tried to smile again, and I shrugged, gesturing to Isabel. I hadn't told Isabel anything about quitting my job, so I was telling Drake through subtle gestures that I didn't want to make a big deal about it in front of her. "We're gonna head up to my parents' for a few days so I can sort through some things and wait to hear back from them. I'm just trying to figure out what's next."
As a result of all the serious conversation, we had barely moved from our place at the entryway of the studio, but Isabel couldn’t resist any longer. She headed to the other side of the sprawling room where there was a lovely vintage red velvet couch. She was good at busying herself when she knew I was having an adult conversation, so she went on her way, checking out his furniture.
Drake took my bags and set them on the floor nearby. He headed slowly across the room, assuming I would follow him, which I did.
"This is amazing," I said, looking around. There was a hallway with a few doors, but the studio was huge and open with what must have been four or five distinct areas—all separately appointed with their own furniture and backdrops. One area had an industrial feel while the next had a warm, vintage feel.
"This is quite an operation," I said.
"Your smile is quite an operation."
"What do you mean?"
"When I left you this morning, your smile was only about eighteen percent melancholy, and now it's more like eighty-seven or eighty-eight."
He smiled at me, and I smiled back. I told myself I wasn't going to let him affect me that way, but Drake was too sweet for me to resist. I realized he had drawn a real smile out of me within the first minute, and I glanced down shyly.
"This morning was more like twenty-two, and now like sixty," I said, in my own defense.
He shrugged. "Still a significant jump, don't you think?"
I returned his shrug. "I'll get over it," I said quietly. "I'm just nervous about quitting work. It'll be good to see my parents—get out of town for a few days and clear my head."
"You almost seem like you're not coming back."
"I've thought of it," I said. "I have to come back and get my stuff, obviously. And I wrote in my email that I would finish out two more weeks at work."
"Well, I don't know if it matters, but my vote is for you to come back to New York."
"That's sweet," I said noncommittally. "Isabel and I would both miss it here."
Drake saw that I was in a contemplative mood, so he took over from there, announcing our brunch plans. He made conversation with Isabel the whole time we were out. By the time we had finished, he had asked her all sorts of questions. He asked her opinion about school and my job and our daily way of life, and Isabel answered everything with precious candor that had Drake glancing at me with amazed expressions the whole time.
I glanced at my phone three or four times during our meal to check and see if J.R. responded to my email, but he never did. We went back to Drake's studio right after breakfast, and Drake began taking pictures of us. He was a true professional, because somehow, during the hour-long photo shoot, I went from guarded and distant to actually being in the moment and enjoying our time together for what it was. Drake was in control the whole time, telling us exactly where to sit or stand and how to act. He took what must have been a hundred photos before finally setting his camera on the desk.
"I got some good ones," he said. He put his hands in his pocket, and I stared at his masculine charms, thinking it was no wonder Izzy and I were both so
smitten. I glanced at his forearms, remembering the way I had held onto them that morning in the hallway while he kissed me. How had things changed so much between then and now?
"Do you want to take a look at them?" Drake asked. "The pictures?"
"We should get on the road," I said. "But thank you. And thank you for lunch. I really wish you would have let me buy that."
He regarded me with a smile that was laced with disappointment—like he knew I was pulling away. I had the urge to throw myself into his arms, so I glanced away. My gaze fell onto Isabel who was over by the windows, looking out at the city. "Time to go, sweet pea!" I called.
Isabel started toward me, skipping and smiling, and not reflecting any of the angst I felt.
"Tell Drake 'bye' and 'thank you'," I said.
Isabel threw her hands in the air for Drake, and he scooped her up, hugging her and making her giggle so much that I couldn't stand to watch. I left them there to finish their goodbyes, and I headed toward the door to pick up our bags.
"Let's go, Izzybeans," I said once I got there.
Drake had picked Isabel up to say goodbye, and instead of just letting her down, he walked her to the door. He pulled a card out of the back pocket of his jeans and handed it to me just before setting Isabel to her feet.
"My cell phone is written on the back," he said. "The email address comes to me, too."
"Oh, good, thank you," I said, smiling and putting the business card into my pocket without even looking at it. "I'll text you later so you can have mine, too, in case you need to get in touch… you know, for pictures or whatever."
Drake gave me a little smile and nod, but he knew I had pulled away from him some, and I could see the resolve in his expression. I hated doing it. I was so mad at my sister for making me question my feelings for him.
"Come back, okay," Drake said.
"We will, we'll be back for school on Thursday," I said lightheartedly as I ruffled Isabel's hair.
Love Stung (Shower & Shelter Artist Collective Book 5) Page 7
