“Yeah, and it’s all her fault!” I screamed at him. “Look, I’m sorry I yelled at you. It’s just, you don’t understand what it was like. What I’ve been through because of her. I can’t forget it, or forgive her.”
“You’re right, J. I don’t know what you’ve been through, man. And I’m not sayin’ you need to forgive anyone. But you heard what that chick said. Immortal. This isn’t just some bad kids gone wild. It’s got something to do with the place y’all went to.”
I wanted to argue with Tristan and tell him he was wrong. But I couldn’t because I knew what he was saying was true. I didn’t have answers to what exactly was happening, and I didn’t have a clue as to how to stop it. But T was right. It had everything to do with our nasty trip to the Umbra Perdita.
“J, that lady back there was right. This shit’s spreading. I don’t know how we can stop it. I don’t even know if we can. But it seems to me like those of us who aren’t shadow people, like we gotta stick together. And we can protect the people who can’t protect themselves.”
I laughed out loud. “Me? Protect other people?”
“What’s funny ’bout that?”
“I’m not exactly the courageous knight-in-shining-armor type, T.”
“You don’t think so? Seems to me you handled yourself pretty well back there.”
I held out my arms to show him the scratches all over them, covered in dried blood. “Oh yeah, I’m Mister Courage. Tristan, I about ralphed all over that chick out of fear. And I was fighting a girl!”
Tristan chuckled.
“Don’t laugh at me, man.”
“I’m not laughing at you, J. Look, dude, courage doesn’t mean you’re not scared. Hell, I was scared as hell back there. You should be scared. She may have been little, but those people with the dark eyes don’t have a conscience, man. They’ll mess somebody up ’cause they think it’s fun. Big or small, you should be scared of them.”
“Yeah, well good, ’cause I’m so scared of them, it’s a battle not to mess in my boxers every day.”
Tristan laughed his deep, throaty laugh. “You’re all right, J. You know that? And you’re one courageous dude. What is courage if it’s not being scared to the point of almost shittin’ your drawers but going into the ring anyway?”
I hadn’t thought about it like that.
“Even if you don’t want to meet up with that Greta chick, maybe I will.”
Great, he’s backing me into a corner. If Tristan went and I didn’t, I’d feel like a big wuss.
“Dammit, T.” I punched him in the arm. I tried not to wince. Hitting his arm was like hitting a rock and he wasn’t even flexed.
“Don’t hurt yourself.” He laughed.
“Shut up, asshole.”
We walked the rest of the way to class in silence. Well, except for Tristan’s whistling. I loved that guy for being him and yet hated him for making me do the thing I didn’t want to do.
“Damn you, Tristan,” I called out to him as we parted ways to go to our separate classes.
He looked back at me and smiled his wide, toothy smile.
Damn you for making me do the right thing.
8. Taisha
The Apocalyptic World
With her left hand, Taisha tightly gripped her daughter’s small, brown hand. In her right arm, she held a bag of groceries. Taisha walked as swiftly as she thought her daughter could keep up. At four, Brianna was too small to walk fast, but far too big to carry in one arm.
“I tired, Mama. Carry.”
“You’re a big girl, sweeting. You gotta walk on your own two feet.”
“But I tired,” the girl whined.
The mother let out a breath and tried her best to ignore the request. It was only a little further. Her daughter could make it.
“I tiiirrred!”
“Oh, for goodness’ sake. Come here.” Taisha stopped. Her daughter’s arms stretched up, ready for a pick-up. The mother negotiated the child onto her left hip, her arm tucked tightly around the small girl’s waist.
Brianna was cumbersome in her arm, but Taisha felt better having her close. Every time Taisha left her house, fear gripped her. It was a new sensation for her. Taisha had never been a fearful person. She’d grown up in the projects and had walked the city streets her whole life. She knew some self-defense, and she knew how to handle herself against street thugs and obnoxious gang kids.
But lately, she was afraid all of the time. If someone were to ask her why, she couldn’t have said. It was only a feeling. Like something bad was all around. Like shadows lurked everywhere.
There were muggings and robberies to fuel drug habits. Sure, that stuff had always been around. But it had gotten worse. And there were the stories of people gone missing. A lot of people gone missing, and most of them were kids. The police had no leads, and the bodies were never found.
She couldn’t give a logical reason why she thought this, but she believed – no, she knew – that the police weren’t seriously trying to find the missing people. In fact, she felt certain that somehow the police didn’t care about crime anymore. As she thought about it, it didn’t seem like people were nearly as upset, scared or outraged as they should have been. Six months ago, there would have been protests and public outcry at the lack of movement by the police department to find the missing people. But folks didn’t bother to put up the posters with faces of missing kids anymore. It seemed like everyone had shrugged it off.
What could have happened to them?
The hair on her neck was on end at the thought, and she hugged Brianna more tightly. Her arms felt like they would fall out of their sockets. She looked up and saw the landing of her brownstone.
Almost home. Thank God! Her small apartment wasn’t much, but at least there she felt safe. She’d bolt the door behind them, pull the chain, and close all of the blinds and curtains. Inside, she’d feel protected in her small fortress.
There it was again, the cold feeling. There wasn’t a breeze, and it was a warm evening. But she suddenly felt cold. Cold from within.
Out of the corner of her eye she saw it. It looked like a shadow, but larger and darker than most. The sun was low in the sky, far too late in the day for such a dark, long shadow. But the darkness crept up behind her anyway.
Taisha had learned not to look people in the eye on the street. You keep your eyes to yourself, look straight ahead, like you’re looking to a horizon. If there are people on the sidewalk walking toward you, you look over them – or through them – like they’re not there. You never look into people’s eyes, and don’t look behind you. You just keep walking, straight ahead.
But the shadow. What could make such a shadow? She had to know.
Her legs were nearly at a run, but she glanced over her right shoulder, curious to see what she was running from. Taisha saw three young men behind her. They can’t be more than twenty. They didn’t seem to be running or walking fast, but somehow they kept up with her. Somehow, they were only a few feet from her back. They didn’t say a word, but she knew they meant her harm.
And their eyes. Their eyes weren’t right. They were so dark and devoid of feeling. It was like she had looked into the eyes of three dead people.
But they weren’t dead, and they weren’t zombies. They were human but monsters just the same. And the shadow came from them. It was like there was a darkness that emanated from them and surrounded all that came into their path.
Taisha turned back around and broke into a full run. It was mere yards until she reached the door. But she realized the keys were in her pocket, not her hand. With her arms full, how would she get the keys out and open the door?
She could hear them. Their feet shuffled behind her. The shadow was almost touching her, the icy cold intense in her veins.
She couldn’t think about not getting into that door. She had to. She knew she’d never see her daughter again if she didn’t get that door open, close it tight behind her, and lock the darkness out.
Her feet hit the concrete st
airs, and somehow she found the reserve of energy and strength to take the four steps in two strides. She threw the grocery bag down while mounting the stairs, thinking, Why didn’t I do that sooner?
“Mama, you dropped the food,” Brianna said.
“It’s okay, baby. We’ll get more.” As soon as her arm was free of the burden, Taisha reached her hand into her pocket and retrieved the keys.
She had five keys on a ring, only two of them needed, the other three she’d long ago forgotten what they were for. Taisha cursed herself for not getting rid of those keys as she fumbled through them and tried to figure out which key was the right one to open the outer door.
They were nearly silent, but she felt them. Felt them like they were somehow crawling into her through her skin.
“Come on,” she said to herself out loud. She found the right key and jammed it into the lock. Her hands shook, and the key trembled in her fingers.
Taisha felt the lock turn. She got her hand to the knob and twisted it. Then she heard a scream, and her arm was suddenly empty.
As the door flew open, she turned and saw that one of the men held her daughter in his arms. He wore a thin, snarling smile and looked utterly nonplussed by the child wriggling, flailing and screaming in his arms. Brianna held out her hands to her mother and wailed, “Mama! Mama!” The men backed away like a landscape receding in a rearview mirror in slow motion.
Taisha ran to them, but her feet felt like they were moving through quicksand. She screamed at them to give her daughter back, and she screamed for help. Taisha yelled at the top of her lungs, but she knew no one would come to her aid. The ones who still knew this was wrong were in their homes, their doors bolted shut, their curtains drawn. She knew what they were thinking because it was the same thing she had thought many times, though she was ashamed to admit it. Better you than me.
She ran after them as fast as she could, but she couldn’t keep up. They seemed to pick up their speed as soon as she got close. Men who had not spoken a word had ripped Brianna from her arms. She was Brianna’s mother – her protector – and she was entirely unable to save her.
At last she yelled out the only word left in her vocabulary.
“Why?”
The man holding Brianna stopped, turned, and still had the smug smile on his face. Her daughter’s eyes were puffy and red from the tears, her little arms still outstretched. She still wailed, “Mama!”
“She is his now,” he said. “Don’t worry, Mama, he won’t kill her. Yet.”
“But why? What do you want from her?”
His only response was a high, shrill laugh.
“She’s so small. Take me instead. I’m strong. I’m a hard worker. Take me.”
The three men roared with laughter.
“You are not chosen,” one said.
“But why? Why not me?”
He repeated his phrase, “You are not chosen.” The three turned, and once again resumed their course, but to where she could not know. Taisha again ran and ran, as fast as her legs could carry her. But her energy waned, and her adrenaline wore off. Her sweeting, still gripped in the shadow man’s arms, became a small dot on the horizon.
“I’ll find you!” Taisha screamed. Tears stung her cheeks, and hurt swelled her heart near to bursting. “I’ll find you. I swear it.”
Taisha fell to her knees on the sidewalk, exhausted and beyond caring about shadow people and danger. As the sun crept below the horizon filled with silhouettes of tall buildings, her tears formed a small, wet pool on the cement sidewalk.
“I’ll find you, my sweeting,” she mumbled. “Mama will come for you.”
9. Awkward
Emily
A week went by, but no Jake. Then it was two weeks, then a month. Each day as I walked into our gathering place, I felt hopeful that he’d be there.
Another training session over and no Jake. I stood with my back to Greta as she locked the door and punched in the code to set the alarm.
“You were off today, Adams. What’s up?”
“Nothing. I have the right to an off day, don’t I?”
“Not really.”
“Do you ever descend from your throne long enough to get out of bitch mode?”
“Whatever.”
That seemed to be Greta’s answer whenever I called her on anything. “Whatever,” she’d say.
“I’m actually paying you a compliment.”
“Right. What, in that sentence, was a compliment?”
“I said you were off today, which implies that most of the time you’re on. But you’re so defensive, you never see a compliment when you get one.”
“Defensive? I’m not defensive,” I said.
Greta laughed. “I think that proves my point.”
Will it ever be easier with her? Or is she like this with everyone?
I decided not to get into it with her and let it pass. She asked me what was up. Maybe I should tell her. I didn’t have anyone else to talk to about it.
“You want to know what’s up, fine. I’ll tell you. It’s Jake. He’s what’s up with me.”
“You heard from him?”
“No.”
“Disappointing. Between the two of you, I figured you’d be the one to not get over yourself.”
“Gee, thanks, Greta.”
“Sorry, but it’s true.”
It was true. I couldn’t deny it. I’d known Jake almost my whole life, and it wasn’t like him to hold a grudge. But then again, we’d never lived in a world filled with Ciardha’s Dark Energy either. It was harder and harder to be our best selves.
Either that, or I’d hurt him so deeply that he couldn’t take seeing me again. I couldn’t blame him. I’d thought about it a lot since we’d met with Jake, and I tried to put myself in his shoes. Truth is, if it had been reversed, I’d probably have been so badly wounded that I’d have turned a long time ago.
So I decided to give up on seeing Jake again. Greta and I had tried our best to get him to see reason, but it hadn’t been enough. I only hoped that he’d stay Lucent without us.
The next day when Greta and I arrived at our headquarters, Megan, John and Ashley were already there, waiting for us outside the door.
“Sorry we’re late,” I said.
“No worries. We were early,” Megan replied.
“Well, try not to be early,” said Greta. “It’s dangerous to stand around out here.”
We all turned our heads away while Greta punched in the security code. We’d decided that for the safety of the whole group, only Greta would have the access code to unlock the door to our meeting place. She changed it frequently and told it to no one. We figured that would at least prevent any of us who turned into a shadow from giving access to a whole gang of shadows.
A few others straggled in after us, and we shot the shit for a while and recounted our stories of the past day apart. Megan was proud that she’d held her ground when a shadow chick tried to take her backpack. And John felt like his newfound hopeful energy was making a difference with the people of his congregation.
There was a loud banging on the door, and our chatter stopped. There were still a few people that hadn’t shown up yet, so Greta went to the door to let them in.
I heard the door close, and the loud talking stopped. My back was to the door, but I could feel the energy as it pulsed through the ground and straight up into me through my feet. It was a familiar energy and one I’d longed to be close to again. My skin prickled, and my stomach began to roil.
I turned, and there he was. When we’d met at Jake’s community college, he had been sitting down. With both of us standing, I could see that he had grown taller. A lot taller. He’s taller than me now. And I hadn’t noticed how much his shoulders had broadened.
In the year that we’d been apart, Jake had become a man.
And he had come to help us after all. Or maybe he had come to help himself. It didn’t matter. He was there. And not a minute too soon. His aura was even more pockmarked with
dark spots than it had been before.
I’ll help you, Jake. I won’t lose you to the darkness. Not to him. Not again.
And behind Jake was another guy. He had to be at least 6’3” and over 200 pounds. He had his arms crossed over his barrel chest. His biceps bulged out from his T-shirt sleeves and seemed almost as big around as one of Fanny’s thighs. The guy’s short, dark hair framed his smooth, cocoa skin and deep, brown eyes. He was gorgeous.
But even more beautiful than his physical presence was his aura. It was a bright white tinged with pink. He glowed so brightly, I thought I might have to shield my eyes from it. Most people, if they had auras left at all, had only a thin band of light around them. But this guy? His aura was a large, unblemished bubble that stretched out at least a foot around his body. I couldn’t take my eyes off of that aura. It reminded me of Brighid’s light.
Who is he? And where did Jake find him?
But apparently Greta didn’t feel the same way.
“How dare you?”
“Excuse me?” Jake said.
“How dare you come here with him? I gave you one simple rule. ‘Don’t tell anyone.’ And you broke it!”
“I … I’m sorry. It’s just that, well, I figured that you needed strong people to join this band of …”
Jake didn’t finish his sentence but looked around at our Lucent Tribe. He didn’t need to say it. We knew. It was a pathetic group of geeks and losers. A group that a year or so ago, Jake would have looked like he belonged to. I don’t know what had happened to him in the past year, but he no longer looked the part of a skinny, pale, never-does-anything-more-physical-than-pound-on-a-keyboard type.
“I don’t care how big he is,” Greta hissed. “Size is not the important thing.”
The guy with Jake put his large hand over his mouth to hide his tittering. Greta stormed across the room and got in front of the guy. He towered over her, and Greta had to crane her neck to look up at him as she continued barking at him.
“You think that’s funny? Well, do you?”
“Yep, pretty funny.”
“Well, there’s nothing funny about our mission. And what I meant to say, before you so rudely interrupted, is that the only thing that matters in this room is whether you are still filled with light.”
The Akasha Chronicles Trilogy Boxed Set: The Complete Emily Adams Series Page 52
