Oh, that’s a good tale you’ve spun for yourself, I thought then. You know nothing of the kind. Yes, it would please you to be her rescuer, but certainly she has said nothing to indicate that she needs rescuing.
“That’s a relief, then,” I told her, and hoped she had not noticed the pause before I spoke. “I know there are some good horsewomen among those assembled here, but I must confess I hoped you would be among them.”
“No fear,” she said, and smiled. “I am sure my mount cannot rival those from your stables, but I will manage well enough.”
“I would offer you the loan of one, but then all the girls would want the same treatment, and that, I fear would require me to borrow horses from my guard…which, if I’m not mistaken, would lead to a great deal of grumbling. I’m sure your mount will do well enough, and I will try not to set too hard a pace.”
“Do not make it easy on my account, Your Majesty,” she replied, with a glint in her amber-green eyes. “Or you may find it is you who are lagging behind.”
Her expression had grown lively, and so I thought she must enjoy riding a good deal, and did not have much opportunity for doing so while living here in town. I was glad my sister and I had decided on a hunt as one of the activities in this week-long carnival in my quest for a bride, even though my mother had thought the idea quite foolish, and even Lord Hein had expressed his misgivings in hosting a hunt with quite so many participants.
As it turned out, however, a good many of the young ladies had already demurred, and so the gathering would most likely number somewhat under two hundred. Even that might prove to be unwieldy, but those of my guard who were riding with us would have to do their best to keep everyone from mishap.
“I do not think lagging behind will be much of a problem,” I told her calmly, although as I spoke I wondered if I would have to rein back Thunderer, my favorite stallion, to keep him from taking too much of a lead.
“And what is your horse’s stock, Miss Millende?” my mother put in, deliberately using a form of address that should have been reserved for someone of lesser birth, and not a nobleman’s daughter.
To her credit, Ashara did not even blink. “I fear I do not precisely know, Your Majesty. My aunt is loaning me one of hers, as my stepmother does not keep a stable while we are here in town. It is so much more convenient to use a hired carriage when necessary.”
My mother sniffed, shot a sideways glance at me, as if to say, This is the girl attracting all your attention?, and then pointedly turned to Lord Keldryn, who sat on her right, and began asking him about the prospects of an early frost that year.
The snub was quite obvious, and I sent an apologetic look across the table at Ashara. To my surprise, I thought I saw the faintest lift at the corner of her rosy lips, as if she were more amused by my mother’s bad behavior than anything else.
Such a reaction raised the young lady even higher in my estimation, for I thought if Ashara could handle my mother, then she would make quite the estimable Empress, even putting aside my desire for her. “So your aunt is loaning you one of her horses? That is very generous of her.”
For some reason Ashara flushed then, and did not quite meet my eyes. “Yes…she does not care for town and lives some ten miles away, in Karthels.”
“And is she your father’s sister, or your mother’s?”
“My mother’s.”
She seemed disinclined to give any more information than that, and I let the matter go for the moment. Truly, I did not care who her aunt was or who her connections might be. The important thing was that she had offered Ashara the loan of a horse so she might participate in the hunt tomorrow.
By then the servants had filled Ashara’s plate, and that of her fellow diners at the table. Indeed, a choice cut of lean roast beef and vegetables and fig compote had appeared on my own plate almost by magic, although I knew that must have been done as I was speaking with Ashara. I picked up my fork and knife and cut a piece of the meat, knowing that I must allow my guests some time to eat, even if I had little stomach for it. Much better to keep speaking with her, to take these few moments we had before once again the seating arrangements changed, and she was hurried along to the final table.
But she seemed slender — almost too slender — and it did not seem chivalrous to keep her from eating. Perhaps her stepmother kept a frugal table, or was one of those given to fads such as not eating red meat, or bread, or eschewing cheese. I did not know how much time we would have to talk on the morrow, but I vowed then that I would do whatever was necessary to make sure she never slipped out of my sight during the hunt. After all, the Forest of Islin was wide, and there was always the chance that we might get lost in it together…
* * *
“I truly do not know what you see in her, Torric,” my mother said darkly, and set her glass of port down on the spindly-legged table of inlaid ebony next to her. “She seems quite insipid to me. And who are her family? No one, as far as I can tell!”
Somehow I managed to refrain from letting out a sigh. This was no more than I had expected from my mother, after all.
Of course Lyarris was quick to say, “I think she seems perfectly lovely. And her father was a baronet, was he not, Torric?”
“Yes. He passed away some years ago, but to my knowledge Ashara is his heir. That makes her birth gentle enough for me. Surely you can find nothing in her manner that is objectionable?”
A sniff. “Perhaps, but nothing noteworthy, either, besides that hair of hers. The Empress of Sirlende should be a young woman of more spirit, like Baron Aldrenne’s daughter, or the daughter of the Earl of Kelsir.”
I could not help but laugh then, and remarked, “I get the distinct impression that Lord Hildar’s daughter has set her sights elsewhere.”
“Oh, you noticed that, too?” Lyarris put in. “Yes, Mother, it seemed to me that Gabrinne Nelandre showed a particular interest in Lord Senric, so I think it is not much use to suggest her to Torric. And if he has settled on this Ashara Millende, what of it? What is wrong with allowing him the choice of his heart?”
“Oh, that is very noble,” my mother said. “Would that all of us were allowed ‘the choice of our heart’!”
I had had enough. “For all the gods’ sake, Mother, are you going to drag that up again?”
“You will not speak to me in such a tone, Torric! You may be the Emperor of Sirlende — ”
“In one thing you are right, Mother. I am the Emperor of Sirlende, and so I will make the final decision here, with no one to say me nay. Do you understand?”
Another woman might have resorted to false tears then, or some other attempt at invoking filial guilt. My mother, however, did not stoop to such meager ploys. “I understand that my son is a fool,” she retorted in cutting tones, and stalked from the chamber, her attendants falling in around her as soon as she went through the door.
For a second or two my sister and I only gazed at one another. Then she said wearily, “Must you always provoke her?”
“Perhaps you should instead ask her why she always allows herself to be provoked! Indeed, I think she would be dreadfully disappointed if we didn’t have at least one argument each day.”
“Oh, Torric.” Lyarris went to pour a scant measure of port into her glass; I had told the servants to wait outside after they had attended to us when we first entered the small salon, the chamber where my family tended to gather after public affairs such as the dinner this evening. Eavesdrop the attendants would, of course, but I saw no reason why I should make things easier for them.
“Don’t ‘oh, Torric’ me,” I said irritably. “I have long since given up trying to make peace with her — I fear I have neither the stomach nor the energy for it. Now, you — you I will listen to. So do you think I am being foolish?”
“Not exactly,” she replied, the words coming slowly, as if she were stopping to consider each one before she uttered it. “That is, your acquaintance with this young woman has been exceedingly short, no more than a h
alf hour together all told, but you would have had even less if Princess Lisanne had survived. It was not as if you could have sent her back home to her father if you found she did not suit you.”
That was no more than the truth. The late princess, if she had lived, would have come to Iselfex with her own attendants, greeted with all the pomp and majesty such an event required — and then we would have been married that same night, and sent to bed as well, that we might get down to the business of providing Sirlende with an heir. Very likely we would not have exchanged more than twenty words before we became man and wife in every sense of the word.
I could not help but think that my way of selecting an Empress for Sirlende was a fairer one.
“At any rate,” Lyarris continued, “Mother will bluster and say horrible, spiteful things, for that is what she does, but she cannot stop you from choosing Ashara Millende, if that is your will. The girl seems lovely to me, and well-spoken, and if her family is not grand, still they are of gentle birth, which is all that matters.”
Her words calmed me somewhat, although my mother’s reaction still rankled. Perhaps someday I would learn to stop seeking her approval. In the meantime, I wished to turn the conversation to happier topics. “And what of you? I did not see Lord Sorthannic at the dinner this evening.”
She lifted her shoulders, attempting to be casual, but I saw the disappointment in her face. “He is not much of one for gatherings such as this, and so he sent his regrets through Lord Senric, but said he would come to the hunt tomorrow.”
“Which does you little good, seeing as you are not riding out with the rest of us.” My sister, though a good rider, did not care for the bloodthirsty nature of hunting, and so rarely set forth on such outings.
“No, but I will be at the reception afterward with everyone else, and I am sure Lord Sorthannic will attend that, as it would be seen as rude for him not to.”
This seemed sensible enough. Besides, it would be far easier to carry on a conversation of any import at the reception after the hunt, rather than while pounding away on horseback in search of an elusive quarry. What that observation boded for any interactions between Ashara and myself, I was not sure, although I vowed that I would find some way to get her alone, to slip away from the endless burden of servants and guards and advisors who seemed to dog me everywhere I went.
I said, “Well, then, you must make sure to corner him as soon as you can, for I fear that as soon as more of the young women become aware that my heart is already settled on Ashara Millende, they will seek to transfer their attentions to some other nobleman, as the Lady Gabrinne has already done.”
Rather than take offense at this remark, my sister merely raised an eyebrow and smiled a little. “Do you have so little faith in me that you think I cannot keep Lord Sorthannic’s interest when confronted by a pack of rivals?”
“Of course not…you know I was only teasing you.” I drained the last of my port and went to refill the glass — that is, fill it partway, for I saw Lyarris watching my actions, and knew she would take me to task if she thought I was overindulging. The gods only knew that a blissful drunk might be just the thing to erase this latest confrontation with my mother from my mind, but nursing a hangover during the hunt the next day did not appeal much, either. So I set the decanter back on the table and allowed myself only a measured sip.
My sister was watching me carefully, brows drawn together as if in thought. “If you truly have settled on this young woman as your choice, then why bother to go through with the next three events? Surely it is not precisely fair to keep up the hopes of all the other candidates if you have no intention of marrying any of them.”
Would that it were that simple. “And neither would it be fair, I suppose, to cancel things so suddenly, and to disrupt the plans of everyone who had thought to stay here through the end of the week, or — as you pointed out before — paid for gowns for the events being held on those days. Also, I believe Lord Hein would have a heart spasm if I were to call a halt to the proceedings at this stage, not when he has already ordered the food and the decorations and hired the musicians and so forth. No, we will have to play this charade through to the end. Anyone with two eyes to see will know that I have made my choice, but I will make no announcement until the ball on Friday.”
Lyarris gave a reluctant nod. “I suppose that does make sense, even though some part of me wishes you did not have to do such a thing.”
“Ah, well, it will not be a complete burden, as I will try my best during the next three days to spend as much time with Ashara as possible. Besides, if I were to send everyone home now, that would include Lord Sorthannic, and I most certainly don’t want to deprive you of his company.”
“How altruistic of you.”
But her tone was amused, rather than irritated, and so I knew she was not put off by my statement. No, it would not be fair to her — or to the Lady Gabrinne, with her pursuit of Lord Senric — to call a halt to things prematurely. Chafe at the delay I might — or rather would — but after all, three days was not so long when measured against the lifetime I envisioned with Ashara once the events planned this week had run their course.
I did know that, whatever else happened, Ashara Millende was destined to be my wife.
Chapter 9
Ashara
Oh, gods, what had I been thinking? What demon had possessed my tongue, made me tell the Emperor all those lies? Truly, I did not know what my aunt had planned for the hunt tomorrow; as far as I knew, she might be thinking that I would wish to sit out the ride itself and only attend the reception, as quite a few of the young ladies apparently planned to do. But to say to the Emperor that he would have to work to keep up with me, that I was nearly his equal in the saddle?
Once upon a time I had been an excellent rider. It was true that my father had me on the back of a horse before I could barely walk, and there was no corner of our estate I had not explored — and many beyond its borders I had traveled as well, since I learned to jump low walls and hedges before I was barely six years old. But I had not ridden a horse in nearly ten years. Perhaps my muscles would remember skills that my mind could not. I would have to hope for the best.
If, of course, Aunt Therissa even provided me with a mount. We did not have a chance to speak when I returned after the dinner at the palace, for Janks was already in his room adjoining the stable, and my aunt and I hurriedly exchanged places in the shadows around a corner of the building, afraid to even speak a word lest he overhear us and come to investigate. Afterward I scuttled up the back steps into the kitchen as quickly as I could, heart pounding, sure someone would discover me coming back inside. Luck was with me that much, though, for Claris was in the pantry, taking stock of her supplies for the meals the next day, and I went to the half-washed dishes and set to as if I had been standing there all along.
Even though I had not been caught, sleep did not come to me easily that night. Part of it was worry for what the next day might bring, of course, fear that either my aunt could not locate a horse, or, possibly worse, that she would find a way to provide me with a mount, and then I would have to hope and pray I recalled enough to ride it without giving away the fact that I had not been on horseback for nearly a decade.
Beyond that, though, I could not keep my mind from turning over and over again the words the Emperor and I had exchanged, the warmth in his dark eyes as he looked at me, the rich velvety timbre of his voice. Everything about him seemed designed specifically to set my heart racing, my blood somehow running hotter in my veins. No, I could no longer deny that he had taken a particular interest in me, not with the way he had singled me out, given me the place of honor directly across from him at the high table.
“You may even be the Empress before I’m a duchess, if the way His Majesty looks at you is any indication,” Gabrinne had whispered to me before we parted ways for the evening. At the time I had demurred, shaking my head, but inwardly, in some deep, secret place in my soul I barely wanted to acknowledge
, I knew she was right.
Why the Emperor had singled me out from all those other young women, I could not say. Could this be another, subtler spell, even though my aunt had denied that her magic could be put to such a use? I wanted to say no, that of course she had been truthful with me, but I barely knew her. I knew nothing of her, save that she had expressed a desire to help me, as the daughter of her long-dead sister.
Very fine motives…if they were her only motives. Perhaps she was only one member of a secret group of magic-users, someone who put herself forward to help me so that she and her fellows might have access to the Emperor for their own nefarious reasons.
No, surely that was only a dark fancy spun from my own tortured thoughts. After all, even if there were such a group, surely they could have found a far more likely candidate than I, a girl who had spent the last ten years of her life washing dishes and sweeping and fetching and carrying for her termagant of a stepmother.
And so my mind played with me, until at last I fell into an uneasy slumber, fretting even then over what the next day might hold. My sleep was filled with nightmares of riding a horse with eyes of fire, a dark stallion that carried me forward over a precipice until I was falling, falling, with no hope of rescue. I slipped into darkness, and it swallowed me whole.
* * *
Would that I could say the next day was an improvement, but it certainly did not start out that way. I brought breakfast to my stepmother and stepsisters in the dining room, with a misty golden morning sun pouring in through the tall window on the east side of the house. Naturally she was grilling them as to the goings-on at the palace the night before, and neither of them looked particularly pleased by the news they had to impart.
Ashes of Roses (Tales of the Latter Kingdoms Book 4) Page 11
