by Amber Bardan
I grinned. “Perhaps I have more secrets than you imagined.”
She stared at the coin in her palm, then her eyes lit on me. A smile broke across her face as brilliant as the first one she’d ever gifted me. That same dreamy look crossed her gaze.
My heart gave a slow thunk.
“I guess you do.” She glanced at the coin again.
I watched the golden lira disappear under her fingers, and saw for an instant that coin appearing and disappearing again. My stomach lifted in memory of that moment of awe, as my father, before he was my father, finished his trick then pressed that very coin into my hand and told me I could have it.
She drew her fist to her chest, then rolled a little on to her side.
This was now the longest that coin had been out of my possession since the day I received it. Father had called it an icebreaker. I’d seen him do that trick a hundred times over, winning over the local children every time we wound up somewhere new.
“I can smell myself.” She sighed.
I drew the blanket over her shoulders, but couldn’t help teasing. “Do you need me to bathe you? The spa is plenty big enough.”
She shivered, and tugged up the blanket. “I hate spas.”
There was something about the way she twitched that gave me pause. “Why?”
“The submerging.” She twitched again, and again I made the choice to pry when stopping would be fairer.
I lowered my voice to a whisper. “Why don’t you like submerging?”
Her face turned toward the blankets. “Because of the time I drowned.”
Her lashes drifted closed. My heart stopped beating.
Drowned.
My pulse started again, this time a thump in my ears.
I could nudge her. Right now, I could give her a gentle push and she’d start talking again, then I’d find out the rest of that story. A cramp twisted my belly. I needed to know what happened to her. Emma was in my protection. Nothing would hurt her now.
But it wasn’t enough. I wanted to go back in time—and protect her all over again.
I brushed the hair off her face. As I well knew, the past isn’t for changing. It’s for haunting.
Chapter Thirteen
Emma
I woke alone in Avner’s bed. Sunlight crept though the crack in the curtains. I rolled onto my back. The pain in my throat had subsided but an ache still lingered in my bones. I raised my arms over my head. The sweet sickly scent of me had my stomach rolling. Gross. I sat up. Two plump white towels rested on the foot of the bed.
I tilted my head. The trill of birds sounded outside, but inside there wasn’t a sound. I dragged myself out of bed, collected my handbag, the change of clothes Avner had picked out of my wardrobe, the towels, and went into the master bathroom.
I opened my bag, pulse skipping for a moment when I couldn’t find what I needed. Then my fingers closed on the bottle tucked deep in the zipped pocket. I took two tablets since I’d missed yesterday’s dose, stripped then showered.
Seventy percent of the remaining illness seemed to wash right off with the grit.
I emerged from the bathroom wearing the pink T-shirt and black gym pants he’d picked. I liked him a little better for his selection. There were many wonderfully slutty options he could’ve chosen from my wardrobe.
I ventured down the hallway into the kitchen. Avner sat at the table, finger swiping across a tablet.
He looked up, then his chair flew back and he rose to his feet. His gaze swept over me from my bare toes to the wet hair loose around my shoulders.
My nipples tightened.
The chill from my damp scalp evaporated. Heat reached me down to the core.
He came toward me. “You look better.”
I pressed a hand to my fluttering middle. He’d made no seductive moves toward me in the two and a half days I’d been here unwell. Now his movements changed, easing into that slow, slinking hungriness that meant I was once again on his menu.
“Thanks, I’m feeling better.” Better enough to want what the look in his eyes offered.
But I wouldn’t repay him for looking after me by passing on what was actually a pretty awful bug.
“And I’ve taken advantage of you long enough.” My bottom lip caught on my top tooth. “I should go home.”
“You aren’t that well.” His eyes narrowed, and he scanned me again. “Your cheeks are flushed.” His hand pressed against the side of my face. “You’re still feverish. I will collect more of your things.”
There was heat all right. It had nothing to do with illness. “There’s so much work I should be doing.”
Not having secured funding didn’t mean I could afford to drop the ball. Not to mention I’d told Dean I’d call on Monday, and it was already Tuesday.
“You can work from here.” His touch slid from my face to my shoulder. “What do you need? Your computer? I can access that remotely.”
His grip was firm, his voice lulling. There was still no illusion that any work would be done if I remained here another hour.
“I’d need more than just my laptop, but thank you.” I stepped back and freed myself of his touch. “Look, Avner...”
My head grew no clearer for breaking contact. He scowled, and made an almost grunting sound. He didn’t like hearing no. He’d get a lot of that if he planned to keep seeing me.
My pulse fluttered. He was seeing me. We were seeing each other.
“Thank you for looking after me. I didn’t expect that.” My gaze slipped from his, suddenly heavy. His hand curled by his side. It seemed like pushing myself through an ocean of sand, bridging the space between our fingers. I took his fist. “But this is new for me, and I don’t want to rush.”
He opened his hand, then his palm slid against mine, and I was stumped for a moment by how right our hands looked together.
“I—” I took a breath and forced my gaze to rise. “I don’t want to rush, because I really like you.”
My cheeks went hotter. My lungs went tight.
His chest inflated, and the satisfaction that blazed from him quelled the moment of fear that gripped me.
“I asked you to stay because I, Emma, like you too.” He used the hand he held to haul me in, then his other closed on my waist. “But you have made yourself impossible to refuse. You may return home.”
I laughed, softly at first. “Oh, may I?”
His expression wrinkled, confused, and I laughed harder. Had he time traveled here to be with me? I had no idea why what should be infuriating was completely endearing. “You’re a barbarian, you know that right?”
His mouth pulled to the side, and he kept scowling, and I wanted to throw myself at him. Cranky face was my favorite new Avner face. Adorable.
“Sorry, seriously now, I’m going to have to go home.” Oh, that frown. I let the weight of my body sink against his. “But, you may call me.”
His mouth evened, and I couldn’t take my gaze from his lips.
“You may make plans to see me again.” I stroked my palm up over his chest. “Preferably soon.”
He slid his hand across my back to the dip of my spine, and pressed my hips to his.
“I don’t want to make you sick,” I whispered before he could finish leaning down.
He sighed and kissed my forehead instead. “Will you allow me one last indulgence before you leave?”
“Sure.”
“Wait here.” He pulled away and went back toward the bedroom. I leaned against the table and waited. The house was more impressive in the daylight. I wandered over to the sitting area. The mantel above the fireplace was a massive hunk of wood, polished and shiny, with visible black knots. There were big plump brown couches positioned to catch the warmth, with oversized pillows and a big cream throw. His
house appeared finished and lived-in, yet there was something tangibly missing. I glanced at the mantel, then at the shelving with a few bold ornaments.
He had no photographs.
Not of family. Not of friends. Not a picture of anything or anyplace.
A quiver of unease rolled down my back.
Where was he?
I went to the bedroom. He wasn’t there. I walked back into the hallway and inspected the other rooms, not even the least bit remorseful if he caught me snooping—he’d asked me to move in after all. His office, opposite his bedroom, capitalized on the national park views. There were three guest rooms. But where was Avner?
I lurked in his office, tested out his chair. Snooped through the wall of bookshelves. I flicked through volumes and volumes of classic literature I had the sad feeling were there for aesthetics. Where were his things?
Where were the secret photos he didn’t want displayed?
I tugged out a thick book with a worn cover, then scowled. An outdated encyclopedia. Where were the books he liked to actually read?
A cranking mechanical sound grated right in front of me. I froze, encyclopedia still in hand. The bookcase opened like something out of a Gothic movie.
Avner stood at the top of a set of stairs.
I dropped the book. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me?”
“I asked you to stay where I left you.”
“I’m snoopy.” I tried to peer past him down the descending stairs. “I should probably let you know that now.”
He stepped out. The bookshelf slid closed behind him. He didn’t respond. I looked at him. Something switched off in his expression. His whole body bristled with charged dangerous energy. An icy warning pricked my senses. Avner had become familiar. He’d won my affection. Did that blind me to his nature?
“What are you going to do now I know the location of your secret lair?” I didn’t back away, even though everything about the way he looked now had me questioning all the things I still didn’t know about him.
He leaned down and his voice dropped. “It’s not a lair.”
I reached for his collar, and dragged him closer. My eyelids lowered, but my heart pounded. “I want to see your lair.”
His gaze flicked to my lips. “No.”
“Why?” I studied him through my lashes. Who are you, Avner? What kind of man builds a house with secret passages?
“Because it’s not a lair, it’s my vault.” He drew back. My fingers slipped from his shirt. He crossed to his desk.
I followed. “What do you have that needs a secret vault?”
“Patents, prototypes, many things,” he said while sliding into his chair.
My lips pursed. Well, he and Haithem still did make things. Maybe this was the kind of safe an uber-rich inventor type needed?
I didn’t take the seat opposite, instead sat on the desk right in front of him.
“Do you have a freeze ray in your secret vault?” I smirked.
The tension in his bearing cracked, and he smiled. “No, I do not have a freeze ray.”
I crossed my legs. “Well if you ever get one can I play with it?”
He rotated his chair so my legs dangled between his knees. “If I ever get a freeze ray, you’ll be the first to play with it.”
I laughed again. I hadn’t exaggerated. I was snoopy. I’d keep on snooping until I had this man figured out. My smile slipped. “Avner, you asked me to move in here?”
He shifted. “I did.”
“As roommates,” I added quickly. “If you didn’t want me to know, how were you expecting to keep that from me?” I inclined my head toward the bookshelf.
He sighed. “I’d have locked the office door if I needed to use the vault.”
I glanced at the door. There was a lock, which would have kept me out if he’d only used it.
“I’d have been more diligent, if I’d known you were such a snoopy—” his fingers curled around my calf “—naughty girl.”
My skin tingled in a flurry of goose bumps.
“I’m not even sure you deserve your present.”
My gaze snapped to his crotch. That’s where he kept my gift that kept on giving. A gift we’d spent nearly three days together without unwrapping.
I scooted forward and uncrossed my legs. Fuck it, if he got sick it was his fault. His soft chuckle sent my nipples tingling.
I slid off the desk and into his lap. “Please may I have my present?” I stroked his chest, letting my thumb slip between buttons to brush his skin.
He grabbed my chin. “You want me to give it to you?”
“Avner, please give it to me,” I purred in my still husky voice.
His heart thumped faster under my sliding palm.
He tilted my face higher to his. My body went liquid with anticipation. He released my chin. I fell against him, pressing my aching breasts into his chest.
He pulled something out of his pocket. I scooted back, making room to access his pants. He held his gift out to me. I huffed. It wasn’t a condom. I took the black velvet box and placed it on the desk, then reached for his belt.
He caught my wrist. “That’s not your present.”
“But I want it.”
“You can’t have it today.”
The protest died on my lips. There was an ache to his voice, one that silenced that nagging little voice in the back of my head trying to convince me rejection had once again come my way.
He hauled me deep on his lap and hooked his arm around me, then gave me the box again. “This is your present.”
Gifts being romantic currency, I didn’t accept them. Period. Except, the look he wore as he held this offering—not wicked, calculated or cunning, just so unexpectedly happy that I couldn’t bear to see it slip.
I took the box and opened it. My heart flip-flopped. A diamond-encrusted gold watch glittered inside.
I couldn’t look up from it. My fingers felt frozen on the velvet. I’d had men try to give me jewelry before, and I’d learned what it tended to mean. What would I owe him if I accepted this?
I had nothing to offer that could match this. How could I live up to this kind of gift?
“You don’t like it?”
I tore my gaze from the box and looked at him. His eyes had turned solemn. For the first time I could remember, I couldn’t bring myself to turn a present down.
“It’s beautiful. Like Angelina’s watch.” Except blingier. That had nothing to do with the compulsion to keep it.
He held himself more still.
I gave him back the box but held out my arm.
He smiled, and the moment of insecurity I’d glimpsed vanished. That smile was my real reward.
“I noticed that you search for your phone when you need the time.” He fastened the watch on me. “Now you don’t need to.”
He’d noticed, had he?
My stomach went mug-full-of-hot-chocolate warm. “Thank you.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. Then examined the gift again. The clasp was round, smooth and thick.
I held my wrist closer. “How do I take it off?”
He took my hand. His thumb stroked above the band, right over my pulse. “With an app. It’s an anti-theft precaution.”
I stared at the clasp resting on my blue veins. The gold was heavy. No wonder he needed to keep it in a vault.
“Are you sure I should be wearing this around?”
“Of course, that’s why I had it made.”
He had it made? For me?
I couldn’t respond. He could’ve walked into any jewelry store and picked up something that would’ve impressed me.
But he had it made. For me.
“It’s waterproof, so you never need take it off, but I’ll l
oad the app on your phone before you leave.”
Leave. That’s right. I curled into his chest. He squeezed me, creaking my ribs. I’d asked to go home, and now I was the one ready to beg to stay. He hugged me, and I loved the way his arms wound around me. The steady way his heart beat under my ear. How he rubbed his nose against the top of my hair.
I’d been heated from the inside out. Infused with a warmth bone deep.
“Thursday,” he said.
“Thursday?”
“I’ll pick you up on Thursday.”
“Okay,” I whispered, but Thursday couldn’t come soon enough.
Chapter Fourteen
I tugged off the heels I wore, then pushed my feet into another pair. These would do. I stared at the glossy white pumps. They’d have to do. A dozen pairs of shoes were lined up next to the bedroom mirror, and if I didn’t make my pick, I’d be going on this date barefoot.
A knock sounded on the front door.
My heart rattled. He was early. I ran my hands over myself. The loose champagne-colored dress was properly adorning my body, even if I had spent the last hour in underwear tearing everything I owned off hangers.
I grabbed my handbag and went to the front door. He knocked again. So damned impatient. To see me. With a grin, I undid the bolt, punched in the code on the ridiculous high-tech door Avner had replaced the broken one with then yanked it open.
My heart dropped into my belly.
Pain tore through my chest. “Dad.”
“Em,” he said.
I couldn’t look at him, my gaze fixed over his shoulder at the thickly painted hallway wall.
“I’ve been trying to call you for weeks.”
With Dad standing right in front of me, I couldn’t pretend I hadn’t known. That I hadn’t avoided calls I assumed would only be asking for money. Or that my not having any money to give had little to do with why I wouldn’t answer.
“I know.” I couldn’t even pretend that this right here had nothing to do with why it took everything I had in me to move back to Melbourne—within his reach.
