“That went,” I sigh, running my hand through my hair. “Exactly like I thought it would go.”
“They’ll come around, Liv.” He plants a soft kiss on my head.
Shaking my head I unwillingly ask. “And if they don’t?”
“You have me,” he says, pulling me down to lie next to him. “And Audrey,” he exhales. “And our spawn, he’ll always love you.”
“He?” I raise my head and grin.
“Absolutely, I can’t have a daughter. Not one that looks like you,” he says. I nudge his shoulder and laugh.
“I can’t have a boy! What would I even do with one?”
“We’ll see in a few weeks…” He says, grinning widely.
I narrow my eyes at him. “Game on.”
I lie on his chest as it vibrates with laughter. Looking over the last few weeks I feel foolish. Once again I pushed him away out of fear. If I let fear control my life, I’ll not only hurt myself, but also William. He’s the guy that holds my hair back as I’m sick from morning sickness, tells me I’m beautiful as my hair fades to silver. He’s my forever.
William leaves mid-afternoon. After several protests I give up and let him take a cab, because I wouldn’t want to over exert myself driving a car. While his protectiveness is enduring now, I see it getting old soon. As I watch his car pull from the driveway I sigh. My parents and William know. Now the hardest part, telling Audrey I’m pregnant and moving across the country from her.
Chapter Sixteen
I cringe as I hear Audrey come home. I know it’s time, well, past time. I lie in bed, tracing the patterns of the ceiling with my eyes. I attempted class today, and it was a good idea at first. The morning breeze greeted me as I left; the sunshine on my skin left me rejuvenated. I was smiling and my sickness had subsided, until a perfume-happy girl sat beside me in class. I rushed from class, keeping the contents in my stomach down as I ran outside. Luckily, the professor allowed me to make-up my final.
As the semester came to an end, so did my grace period. I tried to tell her, but she has too much going on in her life. I didn’t want to add this. Empty boxes set in my closet, waiting for William to arrive. I exhale a long, shaky breath, I’m graduating this weekend, I’m pregnant, and I’m moving back to New York. And my best friend is about to kill me.
My morning seems so far away as I sit waiting for the right time to tell Audrey. Not bothering with my appearance, I trudge down the stairs.
“Good afternoon, Liv, I’m so glad that you could join me today. Long night?” She asks, taking in my unruly appearance, her smile falls and she sits up straight.
“No, I need to tell you something,” I say.
Her eyes dance around my face. “Well, tell me. You’re freaking me out!”
“I’m pregnant.”
“What?” She yells. “Does William know? Do your parents know?”
“William knows.”
“How far along are you?”
“Ten weeks. I’ve suspected for a couple of weeks but I just found out for sure.” I pull my bottom lip in, chewing anxiously, knowing this conversation isn’t going to end well.
“What are you going to do?” She asks.
“William wants me to move back to New York after graduation.”
“But that’s this weekend! In four days!” Her voice rises, her eyes widen.
“I know, he’s flying in tomorrow and helping me and we are leaving the day after graduation.”
“If this is what you want to do then I think you should do it,” she says. She crosses her arms, inspecting me.
“It’s what I want to do.”
“How are you feeling?”
“Miserable, I’ve never been this sick in my life,” I groan.
“Who’s going to help me plan my wedding?” She whines.
“You’ve been engaged for over two months and haven’t set a date,” I laugh.
“Who’s going to set my date for me and then plan my wedding?” I laugh. She looks at me hesitantly before continuing, “Are you happy?”
“I am. I’m terrified, but I’m happy.” Her smile appears as she pulls me into a hug.
“I’m going to be an aunt,” she squeals. “Oh my god, I hope it’s a girl!”
And I’m going to be a mom.
I rush to the bathroom, excusing myself from her celebration. At some point my stomach will stop emptying every time I remember I’m going to be a mom. This is not a drill. This is not a small pregnancy scare I’ve encountered from time to time. I’m going to be a mom and I’m moving across the country with my boyfriend.
With that reminder, I get sick one more time.
Audrey comes in my room, grinning. She takes a seat on my bed, shuffling under the cover beside me.
“Do me a favor,” I say.
“Anything for you, baby momma,” she says. I glare at her and she laughs.
“The doctor gave me a prescription for nausea. It’s in my bathroom,” I tell her.
“I’m on it.”
“Thank you.”
“How long have you been stranded?” She asks, smirking.
“About an hour, I was about to text you.” I sit up, taking the pill and water from her.
“Text me any time it’s what I’m here for. When’s William getting here?”
“Ten.”
“An hour,” she says, checking her phone. “Do you feel like eating anything?”
“Give the pill thirty minutes.”
“Done,” she says, standing. “Olivia, I know you want to be with William and make your situation work, but are you sure that you’re moving to New York because you want to?”
“I don’t know,” I admit.
“Have you talked to him about this?”
“No, what would I say? He has a job, he runs a company, and I have nothing. It’s easier for me to move there.”
“Liv, he can relocate. He wouldn’t want you to move there if he saw you like this. Talk to him as soon as he gets here.” She grins, as if it’s a simple fix. I wave her off as she leaves from my room.
Chapter Seventeen
I yawn as I tighten my fuzzy robe around my body. Just watching William pack is making me tired. He takes each piece of clothing and folds it perfectly; I roll my eyes and sigh too many times to count.
“Why did we get up so early?”
“To pack,” he says.
“I see that but you could’ve waited…” I glance around my closet, he’s put away half.
“I’ve got it, babe. Go back to sleep.” He stands and kisses my lips.
“I’m going to get coffee.”
“Coffee’s off limits,” he yells. I flip him off as I leave the closet.
My phone rings, my mom’s name flashes on the screen. Sighing, I answer, “Hi mom.”
“Hello Olivia. How are you?” Her voice is cheerful, more pleasant than our last conversation.
“I’ve been better,” I say, starting my coffee.
“Morning sickness? It will get better.”
“Not soon enough.” I shift the phone, holding it between my ear and shoulder as I pull a muffin from the pantry.
“I wanted to tell you the house sold,” she says.
“Great! Does Audrey know yet?” I ask.
“I’m not sure if Vivian has told her. Just don’t mention it.”
“Got it,” I add. I pull cups from the cabinet.
“Your father and I are coming in for graduation.”
“Really?” I ask, smiling. I pour creamer in the empty mugs, waiting impatiently for the coffee to finish.
“Yes, I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Is Hilary coming?”
“No, baby she’s going on a trip.”
“Okay, see ya tomorrow,” I say.
We hang up and I can’t wipe the pathetic smile from my face. I thought for sure my parents were done with me. I pour two cups of coffee before returning to William.
“Here,” I say, handing him a cup. He looks at mine, then m
y face, and frowns. “Don’t even. Hey, guess what!” I add, cheerfully.
“You’re drinking decaf?” He zips a suitcase and sits on my bed.
“My parents are coming tomorrow!”
“Awesome,” he says, planting a kiss on my mouth. “Grab a suitcase.”
He points to the clothes left in my closet and I roll my eyes. Our afternoon is spent packing my belongings in boxes to be shipped to New York. I glance around my bare room as it hits me.
“This is really happening,” I mumble to myself.
⇟
I stroke my lashes with a second coat; I hold the brush down and examine my appearance. My blonde hair hangs with soft curls. My face wears a full coat of make-up. The old me stares at me in my reflection. I smooth my soft, blue dress. Physically I’m ready to join my family and leave for my graduation, but I remain staring in the mirror talking myself into it. I slide against the wall, crashing to the floor, with my heads in my hands.
“Liv, are you sure you wanna do this?” Audrey walks in my bathroom.
“Yeah, hand me one more pill and I’ll be fine,” I say.
She hands me the bottle and helps me to my feet. I take one although I think I’m over morning sickness. My parents arrived this morning. William volunteered to sit with them as I finish getting ready. While I doubt the conversation is pleasant, I’m gripping the edge of the counter, refusing to go until the last second.
I catch Audrey’s reflection as she walks from my room. I know what I have to do. Grabbing my cap and gown from my bed, I walk downstairs.
“How are you?” William asks when he sees me. I shrug my shoulders. “You have some…” He points to his eyes.
I curse, dabbing under to my eyes to remove the smeared mascara. His hands reach out, connecting with mine. I glance in my parent’s direction, my mom’s expression is unreadable and my dad is engrossed in his phone.
“Ready?” William asks us.
He leads me by hand to Audrey’s car; I wave as she leaves in Kellen’s Range Rover. My parents sit in the back, allowing William to drive.
“I’m proud of you, Olivia,” my mom says.
“Uh thanks, mom.”
“When are you moving?” She asks.
“Today, after graduation; William came early and packed everything.” I look to him, smiling.
“You two will be fine,” my mom says.
I catch her smile, for the first time since I was a little girl, it’s sincere. The way her eyes smile back at you warms your heart. As I glance to my dad I see he has a smile, but it’s directed to his phone. I want to throw the damn thing out the window and call him an asshole. I want to tell my mom she can do better. But I don’t, I turn around in my seat, wishing this day was over.
The ceremony is long and boring. Audrey watches me from the corner of her eye. Her hands fly to me when I shift positions or sigh. Half way through I throw my hands up at her.
“Seriously, I’m fine,” I tell Audrey. Scowling, her eyes scan my face.
“Let’s just go. Everyone else is,” she says.
She gestures around the dwindling crowd. I sigh, standing to follow her from the building. We received our diploma half an hour ago with no promise the ceremony would end soon. Our parents are waiting in the lobby, smiling with excitement.
“Let’s take pictures outside,” my mom says.
“Fine, but I’m taking off this hideous gown,” I tell her.
We walk to a deserted section of campus. The grass shines brilliantly in the summer sun, the trees provide the shade we need for photos. My mom inspects the ground before clasping her hands together.
“Perfect! We need one of the graduates,” she says.
Audrey and I stand together as a chorus of shutters fills our ears, next is William, and finally my parents. Audrey is posing with Kellen’s family as we finish. They decide to stop for lunch before going back.
“I’m sorry, Olivia, our flight leaves in an hour,” my mom tells me. She wraps her arms around my neck. “I love you. I’ll see you soon, right?”
I nod my head. “I love you, too.”
My dad hugs me and shakes William’s hand, without saying a lot. I watch as they climb into a cab for the airport.
“Are you coming with us?” Audrey asks.
“No.” My voice is steady, despite my tears.
“When’s your flight?” She asks.
“Three hours, we’re going to get my bags right now…”
“Liv, are you sure?” A tear escapes her eye, she swipes to catch it.
“Yeah, I’m sure. Come visit me soon,” I say.
We promise each other we would visit often. I grasp her in one last hug, knowing it will be awhile. The truth is I won’t see her a lot. Despite the sadness weighing down my heart, we’ll be okay. Our friendship can withstand a couple thousand miles, we’re the real deal.
“I love you, Liv.”
“I love you, too” I say, releasing my hold on her.
She walks to her waiting family and they climb in the car. As I watch her drive away with her fiancés family, I know a chapter of our lives has closed, but we’re on to new things. For the first time in our life, we’re starting a new chapter of our life separately.
The day she dragged me to California seems so far away. We were never scared of our new adventure, we had each other. As I move back to New York, without her, pregnant and unsure of my relationship, saying I’m scared would be the understatement of the year.
“Ready?” William tosses his arms around my shoulder. Am I ready? That’s the question of the day.
He opens the door for me, helping me in the car. I look back to the campus one last time. I’m not shuffling with a hangover to class, looking for a hook-up or party—I’m not that adolescent anymore.
“I’m ready,” I say.
“Well, that’s good since you’re already in the car…” He looks at me, brows furrowed, he smiles.
I laugh, “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
Chapter Eighteen
“That’s everything!” I clasp my hands together, looking at the boxes and suitcases.
“No, Liv, that’s not everything,” William laughs. “Now we have to take everything out of the boxes and put them in their place.”
“We can do that later.” I wave him off.
“No, now,” he says. He picks up a box and opens a door off of his bedroom. “Thank God I have two closets in here.”
“This closet is the size of a pantry in California,” I say, looking around the walk-in. Two sides of the closet are filled with rods to hang clothes, the back wall has shelves.
“Maybe you should get rid of some of your clothes.” He digs around one of my suitcases and pulls out a sequin dress. “Like this… When was the last time you wore this?”
He unfolds it, taking a better look at it. “Is this a shirt?”
“It’s a dress and it’s my favorite.” I yank it from his hands. “Maybe I should do this alone.”
He holds his hands up, grinning and feigning innocence. He starts hanging my clothes and placing them in my closet without comments. After an hour, I hang up my last shirt as he places my last pair of shoes on the shelf.
“Olivia?” I look to him, he’s still knelt down. “I’ve had this thought since you told me you’re pregnant.”
“What?” I look around, confused.
“I know this is crazy but our entire relationship has been, so why stop now?” He reaches into his pocket and shifts. “We haven’t been together long, Olivia, I know that but I’ve been there through every stage of your life. The cute blonde curls, the awkward middle school, your experimental college days,” he cringes. “And my favorite stage.”
“This one?” I point to my stomach and he nods.
“While you were convincing your crazy mind that I would leave, I was picking out a ring. I’m prepared to show you, to wait for you, if you still need that. Olivia Foxe, will you marry me?”
His hand finally slides from his
pocket. The black velvet box slowly opens, revealing a pink, princess cut diamond. I nod, sliding down beside him. The ring slips on my finger, I hold my hand out.
He cuffs my face, bringing his mouth to mine. He smiles as he parts my lips with his tongue. His hands guide down my body, lifting my shirt. I feel his lips travel from my lips, landing on my neck. It’s a soft, gentle gesture—one that astonishingly wraps around my soul. I know I’ll never be the same after him.
We tumble to the floor, not caring if we’re still in my closet. Our bodies entwine as I meet his hungry kisses. It’s familiar, yet nothing like I’ve experienced before. On this day, I’ll make love to a man that slid a promise on my left hand.
“It’s perfect,” I say. I twist my hand, studying the angle of the ring. I feel engrossed with a simple rock, and I wonder if I’ll ever look at my finger without grinning.
“I love you.” His lips press against mine.
“I love you, too. Let’s keep this between us right now.”
He cocks an eyebrow. “Okay, why?”
“I’m not ready to tell our families. I don’t want them to get crazy wedding ideas. We are not getting married until I can fit into a size two again,” I say, he laughs.
“It’s our secret,” he says, “For now.”
⇟
“I was wondering when you would visit me!” Yancy walks around the desk and pulls me into a hug. “Oh, it’s gorgeous!” He spies my left hand and brings it closer to his face.
“Where is he?” I ask, grinning.
“He’s in a meeting, want me to tell him you’re out here?” I shake my head. He walks behind his desk and takes a seat, patting the one beside him. “Sit.”
“Any exciting work drama you wanna unload?”
He waves me off. “Enough about me, what’s it like to be engaged to him? I’ve gotta hand it to you, he’s much easier to work with since you came in the picture.”
Forever Reckless Page 9
