by Isabel Morin
At first he felt bad, like he was taking advantage, but she really did seem to enjoy it. Freed from her hotel room with a big kitchen and someone to cook for, she poured over his cookbooks and browsed cooking websites. She quizzed him on his favorite foods and seemed to take pleasure in surprising him as well.
Meals had never been a particular pleasure when he was growing up. There hadn’t been any food to spare at his mom’s, and he’d been raised to think of food as fuel to get through the day, nothing more. And his dad was no gourmet. They’d eaten like bachelors, though at least he’d never gone hungry there. Even he and Amy used to eat out all the time, or else heat up soup and eat it while sitting in front of the TV.
Living with Emily made him realize what he’d been missing. Not just in the way of food, but in affection and fun. From the first day she lived there his house became a home, a fact that thrilled and terrified him in equal measure.
Chapter Eight
“Have you thought about looking into one of the ballet companies here? Maybe you really could get a job with one of them.”
Emily had just returned from practicing at the club and was still in her leotard and filmy skirt, her damp hair pulled back in a ponytail. She was standing at the counter drinking water, but now she coughed and sputtered.
“I don’t think so.”
“Why not? Why not look into it and see if they have anything that suits you?” he asked.
“Because I already know they wouldn’t.” She sighed, hating that he was making her say things that would only made them both feel bad. “I know it may not make sense to you, but I worked my whole life to be in the top companies. The ones here are second rate at best. I just…I’d feel so defeated if I ended up with a company like that, and in a city that doesn’t especially value it.”
Cutter’s expression had closed down, shuttering his reaction.
“Right, I get it. I just thought…never mind.”
Turning around he opened the refrigerator door, but she could tell he wasn’t really looking at anything. His back was tense, his shoulders rigid.
It was the Thursday of their second week together. She’d been in Las Vegas four weeks and was figuring on staying another two or three more. That was already way longer than she’d initially planned. Hopefully Cutter wouldn’t bring this up again. Maybe it was a little weird for both of them that she would be leaving before too long, but it was worse to try to change it.
They were both stiff with each other until he went to work and she was asleep when he came home, but by Friday morning it was like nothing had happened.
“Want to go swimming?” he asked.
She had just opened her eyes and there was Cutter standing by the bed, already up and dressed, bright-eyed and ready for the day.
“If I say yes, will I have to get up this second?”
He laughed. “No, you can take your time. It’ll be hot whenever we get there, but the water will feel great.”
The thought of diving into cool, clear water had her out of bed within minutes. Digging through her bags she finally came up with a bikini, which she put on under a pair of shorts and a tank top. When she entered the kitchen a few minutes later it was to the sight of Cutter making sandwiches, a small cooler at his feet.
“Wow, you didn’t say anything about a picnic,” she said, peering over his shoulder. “This is serious.”
“Hell, yeah, baby, this is the real deal.”
“Can I do anything?”
“Nope, I’ve got it under control. Plus you already made the brownies I’m throwing in here.”
“Mm. I can’t wait.” Standing on her tiptoes she kissed him on the cheek. “You rock.”
“That’s right. Don’t forget it,” he said. He was smiling, but there was an unexpected seriousness to how he looked at her that caught her off guard, and again she was reminded that he wanted her to stay.
She ate a quick bowl of oatmeal, poured her coffee into a travel mug and together they headed to the truck. Lake Mead was about an hour’s drive east of Las Vegas, the terrain they drove through scorched looking, but the days were actually a lot cooler now than they had been when she arrived, the hottest part of the day rising only into the mid-eighties.
The mountains surrounding the lake were as stark as the rest of the landscape, but beautiful in their own way, and the lake itself looked cool and inviting. They parked and made their way to Cutter’s favorite cove, a little lagoon that was deserted when they got there.
They swam and splashed around for an hour or so before getting out. Emily spread the old blanket Cutter had brought while admiring him as he unpacked the cooler. Even though she had her hands on him every day and night, she still wasn’t used to how straight-up beautiful he was.
They sat for a little while after they ate, admiring the view.
“Want to go for a quick hike while we’re still wet?”
“Sure. Lead the way.”
“Hang on a second,” he said, grabbing the tube of sun block from the blanket. “You’re starting to burn.”
Squeezing lotion onto his fingers, he rubbed it into her back before coming round in front of her to smooth it gently over her face. He gave her a quick smile and kissed her on the nose.
There was something so tender about it, so friendly and caring, that it threw her off guard for a minute. This went beyond sexual attraction to something more profound. She was a lot more comfortable with the lascivious grin he’d given her when she stripped down to her bikini.
“Ready?” he asked, holding a hand out to her, and together they headed back to the car where they stored the cooler before heading up a nearby trail.
At first glance the surroundings seemed barren, but then Cutter began pointing out lizards darting over rocks and different varieties of vegetation, and she saw there was more going on than she realized. Even so, she was mostly on the lookout for rattlesnakes. They’d passed a sign warning of them, and she couldn’t help thinking that one was about to dart out and strike at any moment.
“Have you ever seen a rattlesnake?” she asked oh-so-casually as they wound their way along.
“Yeah, once. And I’ll admit I was pretty unnerved, but nothing happened. In fact it was kind of amazing. I was walking along through some sagebrush when I heard the rattle. I stopped and looked around, and there was the snake, a couple of feet in front of me. I veered way around it and kept going and that was that.”
“Seriously? You didn’t pee your pants and decide never to walk in sagebrush again? That’s what I’d do.”
Cutter laughed. “Actually, I found it reassuring. If it had wanted to attack, it wouldn’t have warned me. But they want us to stay away from them. If you’re careful and you pay attention, you’ll be fine.”
So she was paying attention. Really, really paying attention, scanning the ground so methodically Cutter had to keep stopping and waiting for her. Of course, he probably thought she was just admiring the native plant and animal life, not being a total neurotic.
They were circling back toward the car when she heard something, something that sounded like a rattle, and then saw movement out of the corner of her eye. Too scared to even make a sound, she ran backward, stumbling over her own feet, in the process stepping down into an empty streambed. She came down hard on her bad foot and let out a yelp of pain as she collapsed on the ground.
Cutter was beside her in a matter of seconds.
“Are you all right? What happened?” he asked, dropping down beside her.
“I heard a rattlesnake,” she said, gripping her ankle as she listened fiercely.
“Seriously?”
“Listen. There it is again!”
They both fell silent. Then the noise sounded again.
“Did you hear that?” she asked.
“Actually, that’s just the sound of all this dry brush rubbing together when the wind blows.”
Emily’s mouth dropped open and she felt her face heat by a few more degrees. “You mean I just freaked ou
t over plants blowing around?”
“Afraid so. How bad is your foot?”
“I don’t know. It’s done this a couple of other times since I injured it. Sometimes I can walk on it right away, and sometimes I can’t.”
Cutter stood and then helped her up, but pain shot through her foot as soon as she tried to put weight on it. A few choice swears erupted from her and she sagged in defeat.
“You go ahead. Save yourself,” she said, trying for humor even though she was furious with herself.
But Cutter was frowning and looking ahead, obviously contemplating the reality of getting back to the car.
“I’m really sorry,” she said. “I’m supposed to be graceful and then I go falling over myself –”
“Here, take this,” he said, handing her the water bottle he’d been carrying for the two of them.
Before she knew what he was getting at, he bent down and picked her up, one arm under her knees and the other at her back.
“What are you doing? You can’t carry me all the way!”
“Sure I can,” he said mildly, already walking. “It’s probably only a mile or so to the car. Besides, how else do you think we’ll get you back? We can’t get a car up here.”
This was true. She fell silent, swamped with guilt.
Cutter marched along, breathing only a little heavier than usual, though he was soon sweating from the heat.
“I’m sorry I’ve been eating so much lately,” she said meekly. “This would have been easier for you a few weeks ago.”
Cutter laughed and kissed her. “You’re light as a feather, babe.”
He stopped only once to rest, setting her gently on a boulder while he took a breather.
“You could sling me over your shoulder, if that would be easier,” Emily offered. “My weight would be distributed –”
Cutter stopped her with a kiss. “Shut up, sweetie,” he said kindly.
Picking her up again he continued on. After what felt like forever but was really forty minutes by her watch, they reached the car.
They rode home listening to Emmilou Harris, the inhospitable landscape taking on a whole new meaning for her. She’d never really been in danger, but if she’d hurt herself with anyone else, it would have been a lot messier. He’d carried her out like it was nothing.
She wasn’t sure how she felt about being rescued like that. It would almost have been easier if he’d made a big deal out of it, complained or made her feel bad for being so ridiculous. Instead he was…heroic. And it wasn’t the first time he’d taken care of her, or even the most dramatic. She’d never met a man she’d have trusted with her life, but here he was beside her, whistling as if it were just another day.
“Thank you,” she said, squeezing his hand.
Cutter looked at her, clearly surprised by her intensity.
“It was nothing,” he said, trying again to brush it off.
“No, it was definitely something,” she replied, and let it go at that.
Emily spent the rest of the afternoon with her foot up, icing it every twenty minutes. When she tried again to stand it was better, and she was able to limp around without much trouble. Hopefully she’d be okay by Sunday night if she took it easy.
Since neither one of them was up for cooking they had pizza delivered. They were just finishing up when Cutter’s phone rang.
“It’s my mom,” he said, sounding glum.
Dutifully he answered, getting up from the table and heading out the back door to talk.
Emily cleared and washed the dishes in the sink, then made her slow way into the kitchen. Glancing out the back door she saw that Cutter was off the phone, but he was still standing out there, his back to the door.
“Everything okay?” she asked, popping her head outside.
He turned around and attempted a smile. “Same as always,” he shrugged.
Emily stepped onto the deck and wrapped her arms around his waist. After a few moments she felt him relax into her and a sigh escaped him. Together they stood there as the light slowly faded, neither of them saying a word. She was so immersed in Cutter she wasn’t really paying attention to what was out there. When she finally looked out into his back yard, her mouth fell open.
Of course she’d glanced out the back door before, but normally he had the curtains drawn so the sun didn’t beat into the house. Plus until the last week or so it had been too damned hot to go outside. Now with dusk falling, softening everything with shadows, it was as if she were seeing his garden for the first time.
Stone paths curved around low bushes and trees, tall decorative grasses, and an incredible variety of cactus plants. Until that moment she’d viewed the native vegetation as dreary, but this was anything but. Unlike the gardens she’d seen around the hotels – lush, vivid arrangements of plants that clearly never grew on their own in Nevada – this was a little paradise out of the desert’s own plant life.
“Did you do all that?” she asked him.
“Yeah. I picked a lot up at the nursery I worked for in high school. Anyway, I had to put something back there. It was pretty much just dirt when I moved in. You should see it in March when everything’s in bloom.”
He stopped then, as if suddenly realizing what he’d said. Because of course she wasn’t going to be here in March.
“Why don’t you show me around?”
“What about your foot?” he asked. “Shouldn’t you take it easy?”
“I’ll be fine. If I need to, I’ll lean on you,” she said. “Come on, you can show off and tell me what all the plants are.”
“Okay, if you’re sure.”
His hand came to rest on her bare arm, supporting her down the stairs, and the simple contact sent a rush of desire through her veins. At the bottom of the steps he took her hand, the way he sometimes did without seeming to think about it.
Together they walked along the stone paths and he named the plants for her – yellow daisies, butterfly and indigo bush, juniper, barrel cacti, agaves, all sorts of tall grasses. He even had a small herb garden. Somehow that awed her as much as anything. She’d never known any man who had such a thing.
All if it brought home more than anything could how rooted he was to this place. Whereas she was rooted to nothing and nowhere.
But it was impossible to feel down in the middle of such unusual beauty. And then there was Cutter himself, the man who’d created it all with such care and devotion. So handsome he was beautiful, so strong he made everything seem easy.
She put her hand on his arm, calling his attention from a plant he was examining.
“You’re pretty amazing, you know that?” she said.
He looked surprised. “Anyone could do this if they put the time in.”
But Emily was too far gone for talking. Out there with him as the sun went down, she felt herself inexorably drawn toward him.
Birds she didn’t recognize sang from the bushes and tall grasses, and she felt all at once like Eve come upon Adam unexpectedly. An Eve who hadn’t known there was such a creature in the world.
Reaching up she took his face between her hands, pressing her lips to his. Just that, and yet it shook her to the core, the simplicity of it belying a connection that didn’t break when their lips parted, but made separation unbearable.
“Emily,” he breathed, and she could see he felt it too.
His lips touched hers again, testing, grazing over her mouth before a soft moan escaped her and the kiss grew deeper, hungrier. Something elemental passed between them, and a need rose in her to connect with him in every way possible. She wanted to breathe in his skin, taste him, feel him along every inch of her, inside her. Together they fell to their knees on the soft blue petals that crept along the ground. She could feel him tremble, feel emotions coursing through him.
His arm came around her and he eased her back until he was on top of her, kissing her eyes, her cheekbones, her throat. Gentle and fierce, he gave her what she needed, pressing her to the earth when she felt as
if she might drift up into the darkening sky.
Her hands moved over him, pulling at his clothes until he laughed, a dark, shaky sound of bemusement and desire. Standing up he pulled his shirt over his head, then unbuttoned his shorts and pulled them off with his underwear until he was gloriously naked.
Dropping down beside her, he kissed her deep, a lush, devouring kiss full of promises. Greedily she ran her hands over his smooth skin as she licked the salt from his throat.
His breathing was fast and ragged as he moved down her body, his mouth skimming beneath the neckline of her tank top to lick between her breasts. She opened her legs and lifted her hips in anticipation. He was so good, oh so good with that mouth of his.
Pushing her skirt up her thighs he kissed his way to her center. Then his mouth was on her though her underwear, licking first slow and then faster, light and then with more pressure, until she knew she’d come any second if she didn’t stop him.
But she wasn’t ready to let go yet, didn’t want it to end. She wanted to feel him moving inside her while every nerve ending still screamed for release.
Sitting up, she pushed at his chest until he rolled onto his back.
Standing up, she felt as if the last shreds of civilization left her as her clothes fell to the cooling leaves at her feet. Putting a foot on either side of him she dropped down, lowering herself onto him little by little, driving them both crazy. They moaned in unison as she sank fully onto him and he slid into her wet heat. She leaned over him and kissed him deep, whimpers of pleasure rising from her as he drove into her with no barrier between them.
Sitting up he took a breast in his mouth, his eyes closed, lashes dark against his dusky skin. She spread her knees to take him deeper, each thrust hitting home with an ache so sweet it was almost painful.
She was almost there, had been the moment she took him inside her. Now she was strung too tight, her body crying out for release. As if knowing how close she was, Cutter slid a thumb onto her clit, the direct pressure so intense her head fell back and one hand gripped his thigh. All at once her release swept through her with the heat and power of stars being born.
