The minute his father stepped into the house, his gaze sought out Paul’s. There was something on his mind, all right. Paul knew the look. The last time Paul could remember seeing that particular expression was when Christy had announced she was married to Cody Franklin. The news came as a shock, especially since she’d been engaged to James Wilkens at the time. Leave it to his youngest sister to marry one man while engaged to another.
“So, what’s bothering you, Dad?” Paul asked.
“I’d like to talk to you.”
“Sure.”
Eric sent Leah an apologetic look. “Privately, if you don’t mind?”
“Of course not.” Paul sent Leah a glance, too. Her eyes met his, and she looked so uncertain, so dubious, that he had to resist an urge to tell her there was nothing to worry about. But he didn’t say anything, because he wasn’t sure himself.
“And while you two are chatting, Leah and I can have some time to ourselves,” his mother said conversationally. Except that Paul wasn’t fooled. He recognized her concerned tone of voice. When he was a teenager, that concern had often led to having the car keys taken away, or being grounded—until he saw things the same way his parents did.
Whatever was going on seemed worrisome. Leah, who’d apparently recovered, cast him a prim I-told-you-so look and led his mother into the kitchen.
Whatever this was all about, Paul was pretty sure he didn’t like it. His parents were wonderful; the first six months after Kelsey was born, Paul couldn’t have survived without their encouragement and support. But he was thirty-six years old, far past the point of being reprimanded by them.
Leah claimed his parents had sensed that things had gone awry, although Paul doubted it. Yes, the mood had been a bit tense and his family might’ve read something into it, but surely that hadn’t brought about this unexpected visit.
Paul preceded his father into his office and closed the door. The room wasn’t large, but adequate for his needs. The desk, with his computer, took up one wall. Two more walls were dominated by bookshelves. Paul gave his father the desk chair and took the stool for himself.
“What’s wrong, Dad?”
“Nothing.” As he spoke, he slowly raised his eyes to meet Paul’s. “At least I hope not.”
Paul smiled benignly and waited.
“As you know, your mother and I are leaving next week for Montana. She’s got her heart set on being with Christy for the birth of this baby.”
“Yes, I know. You don’t need to worry about the house. Jason, Rich and I will look after the old homestead for you.”
“It’s not the house I’m worried about,” Eric said gruffly.
“Then what is it?”
“It’s Leah.”
Paul went stiff. So much for all the reassuring things he’d been telling himself. His father was staring at him as though he expected Paul to leap up and announce that he was lusting after Leah. Not that it was exactly a lie.
“What about Leah?” Paul asked once he could trust his voice not to betray his uneasiness.
“I’m concerned about her.”
There was no question that Leah worked too hard and didn’t take enough time for herself. Diane had been far more social than Leah, more outgoing. Leah’s idea of indulging herself was reading a good book.
“The family realizes that everything’s on the up-and-up between you two.”
“On the up-and-up?”
“That the two of you aren’t sleeping together,” Eric explained bluntly.
His father was entering territory Paul considered off limits. “Dad, listen, I know you mean well, but I don’t think—”
“Paul, I hate to broach the subject, but there’ve been rumors. It’s only natural, I suppose. I’m well aware that men and women live together without benefit of marriage all the time. Sadly it’s a matter of course these days.”
“Dad, I don’t care what other people think.” There’d always be those who believed whatever they wanted to, no matter how innocent the situation.
His father folded his arms over his chest and nodded. “Perhaps not, but how does Leah feel?”
Paul was stunned. He hadn’t given Leah’s reputation a moment’s thought. She was the one who’d suggested moving in with him, after all. He’d assumed, perhaps erroneously, that whatever talk there was didn’t concern her. Now, imagining anyone daring to criticize Leah sent hot fury racing through his veins. He wasn’t a man to get angry often, but he was now.
“Who’s been gossiping about us?” he demanded of his father. “What did they say?”
“That’s not important.”
“The hell it isn’t! I want to know who—”
“There are a few other, more important issues you should be considering,” his father interrupted.
That worried Paul even more. Had the rumors turned vicious? “Such as?”
“When Leah moved in with you—it’s been what? Six, seven weeks?”
He nodded brusquely. Her coming had changed his life. For the first time in nearly a year Paul wasn’t suffocating under the burden of emotional pain, suffocating under the strain of nurturing his children alone. Leah had provided much more than child care, though. She’d cheered his grief-stricken heart, given him a reason to wake up every morning, brought him into the sunlight.
“What about her health insurance?”
“Her health insurance?” Paul exploded. First his father said Leah’s reputation was on the line and now he was worried about her health insurance.
“When you said she’d be moving in with you for the next couple of years, I wondered,” his father continued. “From what I understand, the college benefit program will only carry her for a few more months and then she’ll be canceled. In this day and age, no one can risk going without medical insurance.”
“I…hadn’t thought of that.” Now that he’d simmered down, Paul felt like a selfish jerk. He’d never bothered to ask Leah about her medical coverage. He’d been so grateful for her help he hadn’t stopped to fully consider the cost of her sacrifice.
“What about her other benefits? Will she be losing those, as well?”
“I don’t know.”
“While we’re discussing Leah, let me bring up something else. Have you had your will altered?” his father asked.
“My…will?”
“Your legal affairs need to be in order, son. If anything were to happen to you now, what would become of the children? With Diane gone, they could be made wards of the state unless there’s some provision for them in your will.”
Paul was stunned by his lack of foresight. “I didn’t realize.” He slowly expelled his breath and rubbed a weary hand down his face. “I’ll make an appointment with James first thing in the morning.” Although Christy had broken her engagement with James Wilkens, the attorney remained a good family friend.
“You need to do more than that,” his father said emphatically.
“I do?” Paul could only guess at what else he’d let slide.
Eric Manning hesitated. It wasn’t often Paul saw indecision in his father’s face. “You might not like what I’m about to say. You can tell me it’s none of my business, and you’d be right, but since you asked, I’m going to tell you. I think you should marry Leah. The sooner the better.”
“Would you like some iced tea?” Leah asked Paul’s mother, trying to disguise her nervousness.
The sliding glass door to the backyard was open, and she kept her eye on the twins. Only that morning she’d found them weeding the garden; unfortunately they’d yanked up all the herbs she’d planted with such care.
“No, thank you, my dear.” Elizabeth pulled out a kitchen chair and sat down.
Elizabeth lowered her eyes to her hands, folded atop the table, as though she, too, felt on edge. “I’ve been meaning to have this talk with you for some time, Leah. I probably shouldn’t have waited this long.”
Leah’s heart seemed to stop. Paul’s mother knew. As hard as Leah had struggled to hide i
t, Elizabeth had read the love in her eyes. And if she’d recognized that, then surely she’d seen the guilt and the confusion.
Leah sank into the chair across from Paul’s mother. It was all she could do not to cry out that she’d never meant for Paul to kiss her.
“Our family is deeply indebted to you, Leah,” his mother began.
“Nonsense.”
“No,” Elizabeth said firmly. “We’re grateful for the way you’ve stepped in and helped Paul and the children. You’ve made a world of difference to their lives, and ours, too.
“I was terribly worried about Paul after Diane died, you know. I thought he might need counselling, but he gradually worked through his grief.”
“We both have.” Learning to deal with her sister’s death had been a painful process for Leah, too.
“The twins are doing so much better,” Elizabeth went on. “You were right, they needed their own home and their own toys and familiar friends. These last two months have been good for Ryan and Ronnie. There’s color in their cheeks and they’re laughing again. And Kelsey’s growing like a weed.”
“I found her standing up this morning. That little rascal’s going to be walking soon.” Leah had difficulty keeping the pride out of her voice.
Elizabeth beamed. “That’s a perfect example of what I mean.”
“You give me more credit than I deserve.”
“I doubt it.” Elizabeth’s smile slowly faded, and her blue eyes grew serious. “I believe you told Paul you’d be willing to stay with him and the children until the boys were in school full-time and Kelsey’s in preschool?”
Leah nodded. “He won’t have to deal with three preschoolers a couple of years down the road. By then, he’ll be able to deal with the situation a lot better.”
“What do you think will happen to the children after you leave?” Elizabeth asked candidly.
“I-I don’t understand.”
“How do you think the twins and Kelsey will react once you move out?” she elaborated.
“That’s several years away. There’s no way of knowing how they’ll feel.”
“I think there is. The twins have already lost their mother, and we’re both aware of how deeply Diane’s death affected them.”
Leah said nothing, her heart growing heavy with doubts.
“As for Kelsey…you’re the only mother she’s ever known.”
“Oh, dear,” Leah breathed. “I never thought…I just didn’t realize…” She’d been so stupid, so blind. She’d hoped her moving in with Paul would be a solution; instead it was creating more problems. The time would come when she’d have to go. She couldn’t continue living with Paul indefinitely.
“What should I do?” she asked, her eyes pleading with Paul’s mother. “I can’t leave the children now—I love them so much.” A panicky feeling washed over her. She’d been foolish and thoughtless, but it was too late to change that now.
“I know how you feel about the children.”
That was something else Leah had failed to consider—her own feelings. She loved these children as much as if she’d given birth to them herself. Walking away from them would be agony—unbearable agony.
“There is a solution.” Elizabeth’s voice came through the haze of regrets in Leah’s mind. “Although you may not completely agree with me…”
Leah raised her eyes to Elizabeth’s, her heart in turmoil. “Solution?” she whispered.
“Leah, I’ve upset you.”
“No…no.” She reached for Elizabeth’s hands. “You’ve pointed out some things I should’ve considered. I can’t believe I was so…thoughtless.”
Elizabeth nodded and, looking a bit uneasy, asked, “I hope you won’t feel I’m prying—but how’s your relationship with Paul?”
Leah could feel the color rise to her cheeks. “We get along…just fine. We always have. He’s wonderful with the children, and I’ve always liked and respected him.” She knew she was talking too fast, but couldn’t make herself slow down.
“So, the two of you are compatible?”
“Oh, yes—we haven’t had a single disagreement.” She didn’t think she could count a kiss as a dispute. Perhaps if they were at odds more often, she wouldn’t feel this growing attraction to him.
“I hear from Paul that you’re dating a fellow professor.”
“Sort of…yes. His name’s Rob Mullins, and we’ve gone out a couple of times in the last few weeks.” She didn’t mention that she wouldn’t be seeing Rob again.
Elizabeth hesitated, and Leah had the impression she found this part of the conversation disconcerting. “Do you have…feelings for Rob?”
Leah frowned, not sure where Elizabeth was going with this. “Not exactly—we’re friends.”
Elizabeth seemed relieved at that. Her smile broadened, and she gently squeezed Leah’s fingers. “As I said earlier, I think Eric and I may have come across the perfect solution. We talked about it at some length and although we’re well aware that what happens between you and Paul is none of our concern, we felt we needed to speak up.”
“Of course.”
Elizabeth made a shallow attempt at a smile. “Have you ever thought of marrying Paul?”
Marrying Paul?
For some reason Leah recalled the night before, when she’d been unable to sleep and had left her room, hoping a glass of milk would help. She hadn’t known Paul was up. If she had, she would never have ventured into the hallway. Would never have opened her door.
By the time she noticed her mistake, it was too late. Although she’d plastered herself against the wall in the hallway, willing him to pass and return to his own room, he’d stayed where he was, his eyes meeting hers in the dim light.
Before she could stop herself, Leah had realized they were only inches apart. She’d so desperately wanted his touch that she’d nearly swayed into his arms.
How they were able to break away from each other Leah didn’t know. She hadn’t realized it was possible for two people to come so close to making love without even touching.
“Leah?” Elizabeth’s voice broke into her thoughts.
“Yes?” Startled, she looked up, surprised to find that Paul and his father were in the room.
“I believe we’ve given these two something to think about,” Eric Manning was saying. “We should leave now and let them discuss it in privacy.”
Elizabeth stood and Leah did, too, impulsively hugging Paul’s mother. She closed her eyes for a moment, wondering how to rectify what she’d done. These past few weeks had been among the happiest of her life. For the first time since childhood, she felt as though she belonged, as though she was needed and loved. But in her ignorance she’d overlooked what should’ve been obvious. Worse, she didn’t know what to do about it. Elizabeth’s suggestion would never work. Paul wouldn’t want to marry her. Nor should he have to.
Paul and his father exchanged handshakes, and then Paul escorted his parents to the front door. Leah set her iced tea glass in the sink.
When he returned to the kitchen, Leah was staring down at the kitchen table. Then, seeking his reassurance, she slowly raised her eyes to his.
“Tell me about your health insurance!” Paul said, sounding angry.
“My…health insurance?”
“Yes.” It was so rare for Paul to raise his voice that he’d shocked her.
“I could be ruining the children’s lives, and you’re worried about my health insurance?”
“What?” He shook his head. “You’ve been canceled, haven’t you?” he demanded.
Leah shrank from the cold fury she saw in him. “I don’t know…. Is it important?”
“Yes. And what did you mean you’ve ‘ruined the children’s lives’? You’ve been our salvation!” He rammed both hands through his hair. “I’m the one who’s been selfish.” He walked away from her, then pivoted sharply. “Why didn’t you say something?”
“About my health insurance? Trust me, Paul, I was dealing with more important matter
s.”
“Like planting a garden?”
“Yes, like planting a garden.” She didn’t understand his anger. It was so unlike him. She turned away, fighting tears. “If it’ll make you happy, I’ll see to it tomorrow morning. Why are you acting like this?”
“My father pointed out a few home truths.” He grimaced. “I can’t believe I’ve been so obtuse. I should never have allowed you to move in.”
Leah thought she might be physically sick. Paul was going to send her away. For all the reasons his mother had mentioned.
“No!” Her cry came straight from her heart. “I won’t let you do it.”
“Do what?”
“Send me away. I’ll fight you. I’ll even fight your parents, but I refuse to leave Kelsey and the twins.” And you, she added silently.
“Send you away?” Paul repeated, aghast. “I shouldn’t have let you come, but now that you’re here, I’d never make you go….” He hesitated, suddenly pale. “Unless that’s what you want.”
Tears of release and relief filled her eyes. She brushed them aside, not wanting Paul to know how badly she’d needed his assurance.
“Do you want to leave, Leah?”
She glared at him, her eyes defiant. “No! I just got done telling you that.”
He sighed and took one step toward her, then stopped, his look intense. “Did my mother suggest the same solution to you as my dad did to me?”
Leah watched him closely, hoping to read his reaction. “She…thought we should get married.”
“And?”
“And…I haven’t had time to think about it. But it seems…above and beyond the call of duty for you to marry me.”
Paul’s eyes narrowed as he studied her. Apparently he didn’t understand.
“I already explained I’m not the marrying kind,” she added, trying to salvage what remained of her pride.
“I never have understood that attitude. You’re a warm, gracious, generous woman. What makes you think you’re unmarriageable?”
Leah laughed nervously. She’d never received much attention from the opposite sex, not even when she was younger and prettier. She was too bookish for most men. Too serious. She hadn’t fallen in love in her twenties, and by the time she was thirty, she’d ruled out any possibility of marriage.
The Manning Brides Page 27
