“Shut the fuck up. She’s not with Mason. That picture is because his Dad was on the gala committee and the Sharks are donors. He didn’t take her. They’re not together.”
“It’s true,” Ivy said as she made it to the door, heaving for breath with Hannah on her hip. “Seriously, it’s like you’re a gazelle or something,” she panted at Connor.
“At least choose an animal that eats meat, okay?” he retorted.
“Okay, what are you three doing here?” I asked, stretching my legs out in front of my couch. “Because if you’re up for drinking, I’m cool with that, but I really don’t want to talk about Pepper. Especially not around sensitive ears.”
Connor took Hannah from Ivy, and her little eyes drooped.
“Why don’t you put her to sleep in the guest room? There’s Netflix,” I offered.
“Yeah, good plan. I’ll be right back.” He disappeared down the hallway.
Ivy sat down carefully on my other couch, perching on the edge like she might flee at any moment.
“Spit it out,” I ordered, in no mood for her shit.
I hated having her here. She was just enough like Pepper to make me miss her, and nothing like her in every way that mattered.
“I have to show you something, and I need you to not freak out.”
“With an intro like that, how could I not be curious?” I sat up slowly and killed the Marvel movie I’d put on to fill the silence that was all the more obvious since Pepper left.
Ivy reached into her leather jacket and removed a manilla envelope.
“Yeah, so I’ve seen this movie,” I drawled. “My safeword is Ontario, and my hard limits are you and you. Don’t take it personally. You just remind me of someone I used to love.” I gave her an ice-cold smile and took another swig of the whiskey.
“Give me that!” She grabbed the bottle. “Jesus. And she said you were one of the good ones. How disappointing. Did you really mean love in the past tense? Because if so, then my being here is pointless.”
I debated my options for a second before the alcohol spoke for me.
“I still love her. I’m a fucking idiot, but yeah, she owns me. Believe me, if I could press a button and make that shit stop, I would.”
She took a deep breath, nodded to herself, and then opened the envelope. Glossy photos flew across my coffee table.
Pepper straddling my hips in the theater.
Her head thrown back.
My fingers deep in her pussy.
Me looking at her with utter adoration and love after she came on my hand.
I cleared my throat. “Thanks for the porn?”
She arched an eyebrow at me. “Not even curious how I got them?”
“My guess would be a very well-paid theater attendant.” Fuck, I hated that someone had been there, watching, taking pictures of one of the best moments of my life. That face she made when she came? That was mine. It wasn’t for anyone else to see.
And right this moment, she was probably showing it to Mason.
“How much do they want?” I asked, refusing to touch the pictures.
“What?”
“To keep the photos out of the press? How much do they want? I don’t care what she did to me. I don’t want these photos of her out there. She’d be horrified.”
After a moment of silence, I looked up to see Ivy staring at me.
“What?”
“You wouldn’t use them for revenge?”
“Fuck, Ivy. Who do you think I am? I would die for her, and it doesn’t matter that she doesn’t love me, or want me. I’ll always do what’s best for her.” The words rang truer than even I’d realized until that moment.
Ivy blinked rapidly and flicked away a tear she seemed inconvenienced by. “Yeah, she was right. You are one of the good ones. And she was horrified when she saw them.”
“She’s seen these?”
Connor appeared in the doorway, and I gathered the pictures, stacking them and turning them over on their front so he didn’t see.
“She has. I already paid the pap. You don’t have to worry. They came across my desk at work, and I got to them before my boss could see them. But I...God, Gentry, I didn’t know that what you had was real, and I was spinning from Crosby, and I just wanted to protect her.”
Every single one of my muscles locked. “What the fuck did you do, Ivy?”
“Hey, now…” Connor took the seat next to her.
She swallowed. “I showed them to my dad. Not the...sexy ones. Just the ones that showed the way you were looking at each other. I mean the rest is...you know...obvious.”
“You what?” I shouted, coming to my feet.
Connor did the same. “Hear her out. Keep your cool.”
“Hear her...since when are you on her side, jackass?” My fists clenched.
“I’m not.” He shrugged. “I’m on yours. And I’d be fucking pissed, too. Hell,” he shot her a sideways glance and she seemed to shrink. “I am pissed. And disgusted.”
“Hey, I kept them from being published!” she argued.
“You let your dad force your sister into choosing between Gentry’s career and the man, himself,” he snapped.
I saw red.
“You. Fucking. What?” My voice was low, even, and filled with so much loathing that it took Ivy a good minute to finally raise her eyes to mine.
“I thought you’d leave her like Crosby left me. Mason had already hurt her so much, and if you broke her heart, she’d never survive it. She was already in so deep and so in love with the idea of you.” There was so much pain in her eyes, that my rage softened enough to listen to her. “I love my sister, Eric. I don’t love anyone in this world like I do Pepper. And I thought if I hurt her a little now, she’d be spared what I knew was coming later.”
“Because Crosby fucked you over.”
She bit her lip and nodded.
“I am not Crosby. I’m not Mason. I’m not fucking Connor!” I gestured toward my best friend.
“Hey, what the hell did I do?”
“I’m me. Just me. A guy who grew up in the middle of nowhere, Montana. Who concentrated on keeping my skills tight and my nose clean, and who fell in love with a little blonde who happened to be the coach’s daughter. So if you two Harris girls could stop blaming me for the sins of every other hockey player who came before me, that would be fucking fantastic.”
“I know that now,” she admitted. “She begged our dad not to make her choose. She loves you so much, Eric. I swear.”
“Yeah, and she’s not with Mason, right? Okay.” I gave her a sarcastic nod. “Pepper made her choice. I told her I would always choose her over hockey. Always. So excuse my surprise when ironically, she chose hockey over me.”
“She knew you needed the contract to buy your family’s land,” Ivy said. “She knew that choosing you would cost you what she could never give you back. She didn’t choose hockey, she made you choose hockey because she figured you would anyway. It’s all she’s ever known.”
“Because she didn’t trust me.”
“Because she doesn't trust herself,” she countered. “Trust me, I’ve heard her cry every single night, and there’s zero chance she’s with Mason. She hates him. She loves you, and she’s willing to destroy herself because she thinks that’s what’s best for you, the same as you just said you would do for her. She simply beat you to the punch.”
I let that sink in.
The pictures.
The contract.
Her constant declaration that she wasn’t worth it.
Shit. She hadn’t changed her mind after that hotel room. I’d never managed to change her mind in the first place. She still thought she wasn’t worth me losing my contract.
But my contract was signed.
Secure.
And even if Coach benched me or traded me, the signing bonus had already secured my family’s land. Who the fuck cared if I ended up in the minors as long as they were okay?
As long as I had Pepper.
> “Where is she now?” I asked.
Connor grinned. “You’ll lose your starting position.”
“Where is she?” I repeated to Ivy.
“We have an idea that might keep you on the team, but it’s drastic,” she added, totally ignoring my question.
“Oh, you two are working together now?”
“Don’t get used to it,” Connor quipped.
“Yeah, okay, what’s the idea?” Traction? A year in Siberian prison? I was all ears.
“So, there’s only one other couple that gets away breaking the fraternization rule,” Ivy started slowly, trailing off at the end.
“Right. Bentley and Chloe, but they had history before she was hired by the Sharks.”
“But that’s not all that makes them different,” Connor led on.
Understanding hit me straight in the chest, and my heart started pounding in response. Holy shit.
“It’s one hell of a loophole,” I said.
“Yeah, kind of an all or nothing type thing,” Ivy agreed.
And it’s a hell of a risk to take after she flat out said she didn’t want you.
But when was the last time I backed down? Got scared? Let someone else make my choices for me?
Never. And I wasn’t starting now.
“I choose all. Where the fuck is she?”
A slow smile spread across Ivy’s face.
“Now that is the fun part.”
Chapter 21
Pepper
“Ohmigod,” Ivy said, gaping at me. “I really am the worst sister.”
I blinked out of my daze, the world coming back into screaming focus.
Excited chatter echoed off the walls from the hundreds of bodies crowding the massive building we were packed into.
“No, you’re not,” I said, though I couldn’t deny how deflated my voice sounded. “You’re the best. I don’t know how to thank you for scoring these VIP passes.” I tugged at the lanyard around my neck, hating that the black and yellow lettering didn’t thrill me as much as it should.
“Please don’t lie to me,” she said, hooking her arm through mine to yank me out of the way of three of the Avengers who walked by. “This is your world,” she continued. “You should be in heaven. Look,” she said, pointing across the room. “There are two Captain America’s, a Hulk, some other green dude I don’t remember the name of, and at least three Iron—” She clamped her mouth shut, pain cracking her eyes as they fell to the floor.
She wasn’t wrong—this comic-con was in full swing and I should be wiping drool off my chin and fangirling all over the place. Hell, she’d even used her press pass to score us VIP tickets to watch RDJ on the Iron Man panel.
But even thinking that name stung each cell in my body.
A week.
One week since I played the villain and ruined Eric’s and my future so he could actually have a future.
The most miserable days of my life—having to watch him at the games, having to track his movements, his blocks, his…everything.
Torture had been redefined when he would barely even look at me.
Because I’d played my part so well, and he’d believed me so easily.
The ache in my chest was raw and sliced and gaping.
But, Ivy had gone above and beyond in her attempt to make amends, and I needed to give her the credit she deserved.
“Hey,” I said, nudging her so she’d look at me. “I’m sorry I’m being a total Debbie Downer.” She smiled a bit at that. “I’m here. I’m grateful. I’m—”
“Heartbroken,” she cut me off, her eyes filled with apology as she shook her head. “I didn’t know. I didn’t understand. I had break-up-blinders on and was terrified you’d get burned too.”
“Ivy,” I said. “You don’t have to apologize again. Twenty-seven times is plenty,” I teased her. “Besides.” I sighed. “Like I said, it’s better this way.” I’d told her that over and over, so many times, trying to make myself believe it. “Did I love him?” I nodded. “Absolutely. More than I’ve ever loved anyone.” My throat cracked and I cleared it. “But,” I continued. “He deserved more. Deserved his contract and his life without the strain of a secret relationship, or a public one that would get him fired.”
Simmering heat rushed through my blood—I understood Dad’s position, but I would never like it.
“And,” I said. “I would do anything to make sure that bright future happens.”
“Even destroy yourself.” Ivy didn’t pose it as a question but simply matter of fact.
“Yes.”
“God,” Ivy said. “He was the one.”
Pain lanced through my broken heart.
This past week without him, it was wicked easy to see just how much the one he was. I missed him like I missed breathing. Like, in ending us, I’d chopped off a vital piece of myself I’d never get back, yet I kept wandering around aimlessly hoping to find it.
I pressed my lips together. “Timing is a bitch,” I said, like that could encompass the hurt scraping my insides raw.
I’d kept myself up nights, wondering what it would’ve been like if I’d met Eric in the off-season. If we’d had the time and space to figure out just how much we meant to each other. Figure out if we wanted to take the leap into the limelight. Wanted to stay together…forever.
Maybe if we’d been anyone but who we were—me, a coach’s daughter, and him, an all-star hockey player destined for greatness.
In another life, we may have been happy.
Like, Deadpool and Vanessa happy.
“We better head that way,” Ivy said, motioning toward where a line had already formed outside the RDJ panel room.
My feet planted against the slick tile floor.
Three weeks ago, I would’ve shoved my way through that gaggle of tweens in order to get in line first.
Okay, maybe not shoved, but I would’ve shown up eons earlier to beat them there.
Now?
The thought of Iron Man simply reminded me of what I’d lost. What I’d pushed away and threw in the garbage.
I’m such an idiot.
A near-perfect purple Thanos cosplayer walked in front of us as we moved toward the line. I was no better than him—the most merciless bastard in the MCU. Someone who did awful things in the name of a better world.
I rolled my eyes at myself.
Pity party much?
I rubbed my neck, forcing myself to be rid of the nasty, negative karma, and move on. At least for the next couple hours.
Ivy had pulled so many strings to get us in here, and I still didn’t understand how her internship had managed to pull this kind of power, but I needed to get a grip and appreciate the day for what it was.
A brilliant, painful distraction.
I wish Eric was here.
I couldn’t stop the thought. The image of him by my side, poking fun at my cosplay—which, had I been myself, would’ve been a female Deadpool.
He would’ve teased me about it before whispering promises of how he’d relish shedding me of the tight outfit later. Chills would’ve burst on my skin and an ache would’ve wrenched between my thighs. I would’ve kissed him, hard and hungry, not caring for a second who saw it.
“They’re opening the doors!” Ivy clapped her hands together as she squealed, and I arched a brow at her as we followed the line inside. “What?” She asked, dropping her hands.
“Are you sure you’re feeling okay?” I asked as we were ushered to our VIP seats, in the front freaking row.
“Yes, of course. Why?”
I took a seat beside her, marveling at the large stage, at the long, black-cloth covered table with printed name-cards dictating each seat.
Holy shit.
We would be literally feet away from RDJ.
“I don’t know,” I said, finally answering her. “You’ve never been excited about any of this stuff before.”
“I’m excited for you,” she said. “Isn’t that enough?”
There was a
twinkle in her eye that didn’t add up, and my twin-Spidey-sense was tingling. She focused on the empty stage, going out of her way to not look at me.
“Ivy,” I said, drawing out her name. “What did you do?”
She gaped at me before shaking her head. “You mean besides score these amazing seats?” she pointed to the insane proximity we’d be to the celebs.
Air rushed out of my lungs.
She was right. I was reading into everything. Misjudging everyone, simply because I was angry with myself.
“These are amazing,” I said, my eyes continuously flashing up to that RDJ card. With each pass, a little bit of awe and excitement built around the coldness in my heart. “Thank you, again,” I said.
“That’s better,” she said, teasing me as her knee bounced uncontrollably.
Maybe she really was excited and too prideful to admit it.
After a few minutes, the room had finally filled each of its seats, and the bouncers closed the doors. A few minutes more, the room darkened, and the stage lit up.
“They’re starting early,” I said, tilting my head. “It’s not supposed to start for another half-hour.”
That was the half the fun of these panels. The waiting, the anticipation, the slow burn until they finally allowed the actors and directors to come out on stage.
“Maybe they wanted to surprise you…the audience…us,” Ivy rattled off in time to her knee bouncing.
I furrowed my brow at her, my mouth open and ready to sniff out what I sensed, but the crowd went wild.
Cheers and claps and whoops and hollers erupted as a man in a full Iron Man costume came out on stage.
I doubted it was RDJ because, while the costume was worth a pretty penny, it wasn’t a production piece.
A mic in one hand, the man was likely there to get the crowd even more riled up before the actors came out.
Like that was necessary—well, for the normal fans minus broken hearts it definitely wasn’t.
Ivy reached over and squeezed my wrist, a giant smile on her face, her eyes glittering.
“Okay, what the hell—”
Iron Man raised his hand, waving at the crowd to calm.
Blocker (Seattle Sharks Book 5) Page 20
