by Karen Cimms
She leaned across the bar and reached for my face with both hands, then kissed me.
“Oh, baby. You can count on it.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
On Monday night we took Izzy trick-or-treating. We did the neighborhood thing, stopped by my mom’s, and ended up at Diane and Wally’s. Chase took Izzy out to see the race car while Diane made me a cup of tea.
“So you really are domesticated now, aren’t you?” she said with a laugh as she poured the boiling water over my tea bag.
I yawned. “I don’t know about that. I would definitely say we are in a honeymoon phase.” I smiled, then yawned again.
“He must be keeping you up nights. It’s barely seven thirty.”
“A little, I guess. I think all the back-and-forth has got me kind of worn out. It’s nice, though.”
“Just nice?”
“More than nice. It’s great. It’s so good I’m almost scared.” I spooned sugar into my tea and stirred.
Waiting for it to cool, I twirled the string from the teabag around the mug handle.
“I found another note.”
“Are you kidding me?” she asked. “What the hell’s his problem?”
I wrapped my hands around the mug to warm them.
“Who knows?” Preston had left a note on my car on Thursday. He hadn’t come inside Blondie’s, but twice now I’d found notes tucked under my windshield wiper when I left work. And there had also been that one text message.
“Do you think he knows about Chase?”
“Maybe. For fuck’s sake! He’s engaged. Besides, I told him it was over, and I meant it. And honestly, the more I think about it, the more I believe it was over for me long before then, but I was too stubborn to admit that I had wasted all that time. Is that crazy or what?”
Her face puckered. “Why are you even asking me if I think you and Preston were crazy? You already know the answer to that. So what did Chase say?”
“Are you kidding? I can’t tell him. He’d blow a gasket. If he thought Preston was hanging around, he’d be furious.”
“I can’t blame him.”
“Yeah, but I think he needs to trust me to handle it. Right?”
Diane poured a splash of milk into her tea and stirred it slowly, staring into her cup as she did. I waited while she raised the cup and took a sip.
She set the cup down and cleared her throat. A lecture was coming my way.
“Don’t take this the wrong way. You know I love you, but you’re a big flirt, Rain. Shit, I’ve caught my own husband patting you on the ass, and if he does it again, I might break his hand. But most of the guys we know are like that. I’ve seen the way some of them leer at you, and I’m sure Chase sees it too. Guys are possessive, and you’re his now. He doesn’t want someone looking at you like that.”
Even my best friend had no faith in me. “Diane!”
“I’m serious. Think about it. How would you like it if women were making obscene remarks as he walked by or flirting with him down at the gas station while he worked on their engines?”
I set my cup down slowly, pulled in a deep breath, and pinned her with a look. “I trust him. I wouldn’t think anything of it. In fact, I’d think it was a testimony to my excellent taste.”
“Bullshit. And besides, even if that were true, guys don’t think like that. They think with their dicks, and they beat their chests, and they know that every other guy is thinking the same thing they are. That’s why they get all macho and want to start pounding on each other.”
The engine of the race car started up outside, and I pictured Chase in the driver’s seat with Izzy in his lap. Diane stood and closed the door to block out the noise.
“Did you tell him about the photo shoots with Antoine?”
“Not yet.”
“Are you kidding me? Preston may have been okay with that shit, but I have a feeling Chase isn’t going to be on board. At all.”
“To be honest, I was thinking of giving it up anyway. I’m spreading myself way too thin lately. The extra money was nice, but I’m worn out. I’ve been sick twice already this year, and I feel like I’m coming down with something again.”
“Good girl. I can’t see him being okay with it.”
“When did you get so smart about men?”
“Since I regularly have a crew of them in my garage. And because my husband is a blabbermouth and tells me what they say.”
I remembered about how miserable Chase had looked Saturday night when he’d dropped me off at work in my bunny outfit, and how he’d eye me up before I’d leave for work at the bar, never saying anything about the way I was dressed, but always looking like he wanted to. “You think maybe I should tone it down a bit? You know, at Blondie’s?”
“Wouldn’t hurt. So should I plan on another person for Thanksgiving?”
“Actually,” I said a bit sheepishly, “Chase says his sister-in-law usually cooks dinner, and his mother will be coming in from Allentown, and he wants me to meet her.”
“Oh, fuck. You have to have dinner with Lorraine the Pain?”
I laughed. “Shh! What if Chase heard you call her that? I told him I knew Lorraine from school. I never told him she detested me.”
“Well, that sucks. Maybe you can come for dessert, then.”
I nodded and stifled another yawn. “Speaking of dessert, you have any cookies or anything? I’m starving.”
“No cookies, but I have a bowl of Halloween candy.” She went to fetch the bowl from near the front door and set it down on the table between us. I helped myself to a peanut butter cup. “Just promise me that now that you’re in a relationship and you’re all happy and shit, you’re going to get fat.”
I popped the candy in my mouth. “I’ll see what I can do to help a girl out.”
She snatched up a fun-sized Milky Way. “That’s all I ask.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
It had been a hectic week, and by Sunday evening, I was exhausted. I’d cleaned my apartment, done several loads of laundry, driven over to Chase’s and made dinner, and gotten Izzy off to bed. Chase offered to do the dishes and insisted I take a long, hot bubble bath. He even set out candles, poured me a glass of wine, and brought me my iPod so I could listen to music.
A girl could get used to being treated like this.
I’d been soaking for a good long while when he knocked on the door and poked his head in and to ask if I needed anything.
I slid up into a sitting position. “No, just you. Want to join me?”
“I thought you were relaxing.”
“If I get any more relaxed, I may slide down the drain.”
“Well, I wouldn’t want that to happen.” He stepped out of the room for a moment and returned with another glass and the bottle of wine.
I made room for him, but it was a tight squeeze.
“We need a bigger bathtub,” he pointed out as I settled in between his legs.
I leaned back against him, one knee drawn up and the other leg hooked over the side of the tub. “Not much you can do about that, is there? But wouldn’t that be great? Imagine all the wicked things we could do in a nice big bathtub.”
“Well, now that you mention it, I was meaning to talk to you about that.”
“Getting a bigger bathtub? That would be kind of crazy, since you rent.”
“I know, which is why I’m thinking of buying a place.”
My heart might have skidded to a stop. “You’re moving?”
“If you come with me.”
“Where?”
“Here—well, somewhere around here. Things are great between us, and I still want you to live with me.” He pointed to the collection of hair products around the tub, the panties drying on the shower rod, and all my makeup piled on the counter, not to mention the basket of Izzy’s tub toys sitting in the corner. “You’ve got half your stuff here and the other half on the other side of town. I want you under my roof. I want you to know I’m taking care of you and Izzy. I want to make
your life easier. I want you to feel safe and protected. I want to trip on Izzy’s toys when I come home from w—”
I gave him a gentle shove. “You say that now, but step on one Barbie shoe barefoot and you’ll be singing a different tune.”
“I’m serious, Rain.” He leaned as far forward as he could, given the tight quarters, and wrapped me in his arms. “I love you. I’ve been afraid to say it because I don’t want to freak you out, but I’ve loved you for—”
I twisted toward him and pressed my fingers against his lips, feeling the magnitude of what he was telling me.
“Stop. Listen to me. First, I don’t need someone to take care of me and Izzy. I’ve been taking care of the two of us, more or less, since she was born. That’s important to me.” He started to speak again, but I pressed harder. “Second, we’ve only been together for six weeks. And third, I’m pretty sure I love you too.”
I took my fingers away, but kept them close to his mouth in case I needed them again. “But it’s still too soon to live together. I don’t want to fuck this up. I like the way things are. We’re together every night as it is. Why jeopardize things between us?”
“Exactly—we’re together every night. How would we be jeopardizing anything?”
I loved him. I didn’t care who thought it was crazy or too soon, and I could see someday making a commitment to him, much bigger than just living together. But being independent was a big deal for me, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to give that up. My heart was still pretty bruised, and I didn’t think I could survive if he changed his mind about us later. So for now, even if it meant disappointing him, I had to protect what was mine.
Disappointed, he flung himself back against the wall. Water splashed out over the sides and onto the floor. “Fine. But I’m still going to look for a house. And you’re coming with me. If nothing else, we’ll have a bigger fucking bathtub.”
I pressed my lips together to try and hide my smile.
“I could totally get behind a bigger bathtub.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
About a week before Thanksgiving, I met with a real estate agent, and since I wanted Rain and Izzy to live with me in whatever house I bought, I dragged them along whenever I went to see a listing.
Rain refused to comment, insisting this was all on me and her opinion didn’t matter, but I could tell just by watching her what she was thinking.
If her eyes widened, her lips quirked slightly, or she ran her hand over something slowly—like granite countertops—that meant she liked it. If her eyes narrowed, her nostrils flared, or her lips twisted—as they did for no bathtub in the en suite—it was a no.
And she thought we didn’t know each other well enough to move in together.
When I told my brother I was house shopping and that I hoped Rain would eventually agree to move in with me, he gave me a strange look.
“I don’t know, man. I mean, she’s hot, don’t get me wrong, but you don’t want to get mixed up with someone like that. I mean . . . c’mon, Chase. I hope you’re keeping it wrapped up, because from what I’ve heard, she’s slept with half the damn township.”
“What the fuck did you say?” If my brother was as smart as I believed him to be, he’d better watch how he rephrased that.
“All I’m saying is watch your step. There’s nothing wrong with having a good time, and after what you’ve been through, you deserve it, but—”
My ratchet hit the floor of the bay with a loud clatter as I stalked toward him.
“Whoa!” he cried, holding his hands up. “What the hell’s gotten into you?”
“You watch your fucking mouth.” I aimed a finger in his direction.
“Are you serious? You’re coming after me over some little piece of—”
“Don’t!” One more word and I didn’t care if he was my brother.
“What the fuck is your problem?”
“I mean it, Dylan. Don’t talk about her like that. You’ll respect her, or I have nothing to say to you.”
He stared at me, his mouth working, but he had enough sense to keep it shut. He stormed into his office. After a few minutes, he returned and held out what at first looked like a spiral bound book. It turned out to be a calendar.
“Here,” he said, waving it at me. “Check out Miss February.”
My belly twisted itself into a knot, even though I had no idea what he was talking about. Given the smug look on his face, I didn’t want to find out.
“Go ahead. Take it.”
I turned the calendar over in my hands. Beautiful Bartenders of New Jersey 2012.
“February,” he repeated. “Comes right after January. However, I’m betting a lot of guys come right after checking out Miss February.”
I didn’t even know why yet, but I wanted to punch him. I flipped up the cover and turned the first page: January . . . February.
If I’d been much older than twenty-seven, chances were good I might’ve had a heart attack, although the chances of my having an aneurysm were still pretty high.
Rain’s arms were crossed above her head. She was dressed in a tight, long-sleeved red turtleneck, cropped high enough to expose the bottom half of her perfect breasts. The matching bikini bottoms were cut in a low V. Her lips and nails were blood red, and her nipples pointy enough through the stretchy fabric to cut glass. The stem of two dark red cherries was gripped between her teeth.
“We cannot tell a lie,” the caption read. “Miss February has us tongue-tied.”
Fuck.
“Does your wife know you have this?” I asked, trying to deflect some of what I was feeling.
The son of a bitch had the nerve to snort. I tore out the page and tossed the calendar on the floor.
“What do you think that’s going to do?” he laughed. “It’s last year’s calendar, Chase, and they printed thousands of them. More than half the guys in New Jersey probably still have their copies.”
“You know what? I think you’re jealous. You couldn’t get a girl like Rain, so you have to piss all over me because I can.”
“That’s what you think? You ever notice how many notches she has on her bedpost? You’re the latest in a very long line, little brother.” He took a few steps back. “And that’s not all she’s done. Your little plaything poses for magazines as well. She must be one hell of a mother. Maybe you should get her kid a copy of the latest issue so she can take it to school for show and tell. I bet no one would even be surprised.”
The blood was pounding in my head. “I think you better shut the fuck up.”
He walked toward his office, shaking his head. Before he entered, he turned back.
“Suit yourself, Chase. You say you know what you’re doing. I hope so. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. And if you were planning on bringing her for Thanksgiving, don’t. Lorraine won’t have her in our house, and I’m standing by my wife.” The door to his office slammed shut.
“We weren’t coming anyway!” I called after him.
I finished changing the tie rod on the Caravan I’d been working on, then grabbed my stuff and left, even though it was only a little past three.
Rain had gone Christmas shopping with Diane. If I hadn’t offered to pick Izzy up at her mother’s and bring her to my place, I’d park my ass at the bar on the corner and drink until I didn’t want to bash my brother’s face in. But I wouldn’t drink and drive with Izzy, not even one beer. Besides, if anyone could get my mind off Dylan’s bullshit, it was Izzy.
I also wanted a clear head when I talked with Rain later. She looked incredible in that calendar, but the thought of some hairy fuck jerking off to her picture made my skin crawl. And if there were other photos of her out there, more calendars or, god forbid, magazines . . .
The turkey club I had for lunch threatened to reappear.
I checked my phone before starting my truck and found a text.
Rain: Could you stop at my apt for Harvey? Forgot to pack him.
Another reason she should live with me�
�all this back-and-forth was nonsense. I fired off a text telling her I’d take care of it.
The luncheonette was closed when I got there, and the parking lot was empty. The weather suited my mood, cold and miserable. Between the low pressure and my fucking brother, my head was pounding. At least I knew where Rain kept the aspirin.
I let myself in with my key. On the small kitchen table was a large bouquet of red roses. There had to be at least two dozen. I debated for less than ten seconds. It was wrong, but I opened the card anyway.
One for every month I’ve loved you. Missing you. P
I crushed the card in the palm of my hand and pulled out my phone.
“Dorinda? I’m in Rain’s apartment. Did you put these flowers in here?”
“Yeah. She’d left by the time they came, so I just put them upstairs. Why’d you send her flowers?”
“They’re not from me.”
Several beats of silence followed.
“Oh. Crap.”
I wanted to throw the vase against the wall. “Listen, I’m going to be a little late picking Izzy up.”
“Don’t do anything foolish, Chase. Rain doesn’t even know. Just throw them out.”
“Oh, I’m going to throw them out all right.” I hung up before she could say anything else.
I grabbed the flowers and threw the arrangement on the floor of my truck, splashing water onto the carpet and the door, which pissed me off even more. The notes, and now this? This loser was lucky I wasn’t heading for his house instead of his office.
I was still pissed that Rain hadn’t told me Preston had been leaving notes on her car, having to find that out from Wally, but I understood why she wasn’t telling me. She had nothing to do with it, and I couldn’t hold what Preston was doing against her.
But I could sure as hell could hold it against him. Like maybe against his throat.
Jamison Architectural Associates was a two-story glass-and-metal building. Fancy topiaries, pruned into balls and cones lined the walkway from the parking lot to the front door. I grabbed the vase and the roses, half of which were now broken, and stormed in through the front doors.
