by Cameron Dane
“I know you’re probably still out with Darren and I know it’s rude to interrupt and I know I don’t even necessarily have the right to do it and, goddamn it, I wanted to kill the blond when you walked into the restaurant with him, but I had Shawn and you thought something, but it’s not what you think. It wasn’t a choice, beautiful. It wasn’t you or them, I promise. You’re everything to me. I don’t want you to be with him. I want you to be with me. Please tell him you have to go and come be with me. I’ll wait all night. Forever, if that’s what it takes. I’m not ever saying goodbye to you again.” The words poured out of Garrick, one on top of the next, through a throat that barely let him make sound.
Oh Jesus. Garrick’s chest banded too tightly for comfort. Jesus. Jesus. Jesus.
A long silent pause--too fucking long--sucked the rest of the air right out of Garrick’s body.
He hung up the phone as if it had a disease, without Devlin ever having said a word.
Garrick didn’t dare risk hearing a rejection. If he did, he might never get up from the floor again.
Chapter Ten
Devlin leaned against his headboard, in total darkness, listening to the drone of a dial tone buzzing in his ear.
Gradyn’s--Garrick’s--heartbreaking run-on confession reverberated in his ear, all of the words mingling for a moment in a confusing cacophony until a handful sorted themselves out and rang loudly, as if someone shouted them into his very being.
It wasn’t a choice between them and you; it’s not what you think.
And, he called me beautiful.
Devlin’s heart squeezed and he stifled a ridiculous sob. His muscles protested the tension that had held his entire body in rigor from the moment Garrick Langley’s name had shown up on his cell phone’s LCD screen. Devlin forced himself to breathe, but the second the tightness within him released, he hissed through a concentration of pleasure as the thick silicone dildo lodged halfway up his ass slid out of his body and dropped to the mattress.
His passage throbbed as if it were a pair of hands reaching to pull something into its clutches again. Devlin fitted the rounded head of the toy to his pucker once more and nudged it against his rapidly closing entrance. He closed his eyes and pushed the black silicone against his ring. As he did, he tried to conjure the image that had helped him relax enough the first time to get the dildo inside him. Pictures of the same man immediately came back into Devlin’s mind but instead of the tattooed, bald, muscle-bound images of Gradyn that had kept Devlin company in his dreams for five years, a chiseled, sleeker, raven-haired Garrick appeared. The desperate longing in Garrick’s voice from just minutes ago filled Devlin’s head, along with a picture of the frightened man in Devlin’s hallway the other night, which then morphed to the sexy-as-all-get-out memory of him laughing with Shawn as he carried the boy out of the pizza joint.
Devlin’s cock stirred and pushed against his belly but his channel would not stop clenching long enough to ease the toy back into his ass.
Come be with me. I’ll wait all night. I’m not ever saying goodbye to you again.
Devlin’s body already knew what his once-broken heart feared to risk again.
He tossed the dildo aside and grabbed his sweats from the foot of his bed. He crashed against his wall with a thud as he hopped his way into them and then grabbed his T-shirt and finally his keys off a table by the door as he tore out of the apartment.
* * * *
Devlin’s bare feet squished in the mist-damp earth as he ran across the Fine’s front lawn but he didn’t dare slow his steps through the slick grass or up the narrow flight of white-painted steps that led to Garrick’s apartment. Devlin hadn’t thought to grab sneakers in his frantic race down to his car and then hadn’t wanted to waste time going back up to get them when he realized he didn’t have on shoes.
Didn’t matter. He only cared about getting to Garrick.
Garrick ripped open the door the second Devlin hit the small landing. He stood before Devlin so beautiful, clad only in the cargo shorts Devlin had left him in earlier that day, and everything about this newer, leaner, dark-haired man made Devlin’s mouth go dry.
Devlin cleared his throat; he tried to smile but it felt tight. “Hi.”
Garrick reached out and put his hand on Devlin’s chest, as if feeling him out. “You’re here.” His unfamiliar blue eyes glistened with brightness for a split second, and then he grabbed a fistful of Devlin’s shirt and tugged him over the threshold. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I stare out the window when I can’t sleep, and when I saw your car my stomach started to flutter. When you opened your door I didn’t know if I was seeing you just because I wanted it so badly.” Garrick’s fingers shook as he shut the door, and the trembling didn’t let up when he took Devlin’s hand in his. “But here you are.”
Devlin wasn’t entirely steady either. He wanted to remain strong and get Garrick’s secrets out in the open right away, but that became less and less important with every second Garrick’s vulnerability hit at him in drenching waves.
Garrick pawed at Devlin’s shirt, as if afraid to stop touching him. “Devlin...”
“Promise me we’ll get this sorted out and be okay together,” Devlin said, his voice as shaky as Garrick was all over. He wanted to throw himself into Garrick’s arms and learn him all over again. At the same time, the man’s reemergence in Devlin’s life had dredged up a heavy ache whose weight had almost crushed Devlin once before. “I can’t survive having my heart ripped out by you a second time.”
Garrick’s face crumbled, and his voice cracked. “I’m so sorry I hurt you.” He tugged Devlin to him with their linked hands, pulled him into his wonderful warmth, and held him tight. “I ran to Redemption because of you, beautiful.” He slid his hands down Devlin’s back and knotted them into fists against the slope of Devlin’s ass. Choppy breathing warmed Devlin’s neck. Garrick kissed his way up Devlin’s skin, stopping with his mouth at Devlin’s ear. “I love you.” Garrick’s chest heaved unevenly as he said it. “I promise.”
Oh, sweet Jesus God. Devlin’s knees went wobbly, his chest burned, and his throat clogged as he stifled down a stupid, hopeful sob. He said he loves me.
“Stay with me,” Garrick added quickly. He clung to Devlin, half holding him up, and his voice slipped to something well past raw exposure. “Please don’t go out with that other guy again.”
Garrick’s plea sank into Devlin’s flesh, hurting him physically. He pulled out of hiding, looked, and saw clear torment mapping Garrick’s face into harsh lines of need. Easing his pain slipped Devlin the rest of the way home.
“I wasn’t with him, baby.” Devlin caressed Garrick’s cheek, almost tearing up when the man nuzzled into his hand. “It wasn’t what you thought either. I was home when you called, not out with Darren.” Heat burned up Devlin’s chest and neck. He could feel it suffusing his cheeks too, but Garrick stood before him, naked longing shining in his too-blue eyes, and Devlin could not leave him hanging, wondering about the rest. “I have this toy, and I tried to make it feel like you. But then you called, and I couldn’t trick my body when it knew you were so close by.” Devlin pushed his sweats down in the back and guided one of Garrick’s hands to his hole. “I’m still slick inside from what I was doing while thinking of you.”
“Really?” Garrick asked.
Looking into each other’s eyes, Devlin nodded, and Garrick pushed his middle finger into Devlin’s ass. Devlin sucked in a deep breath at the breaching of his bud.
“Jesus,” Garrick whispered gutturally, and kept delving until his finger slipped into Devlin past the second knuckle. He went right for Devlin’s sweet spot, and Devlin bumped his ass back into the taking, requesting more. Garrick forced a second digit in right alongside the first and worked them in a shallow thrust to Devlin’s low moans of delight.
Garrick probed Devlin’s chute with one hand and with the other rubbed at his own bulge pushing full and visible against the light tan color of his shorts. “You
’re fucking primed already,” Garrick said, “and I feel like I’ve been hard since you walked into the garage two days ago.” Garrick held his two fingers just inside Devlin’s entrance. He teased the sensitive ring, stretching Devlin just enough to pleasantly sting. Never once, as Garrick did it, did he look over Devlin’s shoulder or break their gaze. “You swear you really weren’t with Darren after the restaurant?” Clear fear continued to live in his eyes.
“I wasn’t. I promise.” Devlin ran his hand down Garrick’s arm, trying to soothe, and ended by threading his fingers through the backs of Garrick’s, over the heat of Garrick’s fully erect cock. “What you saw was friendly acquaintances who’d made plans for dinner and were hungry. I talked to Darren at my apartment before we went out. After the day I spent with you...”
Devlin took an unsteady breath as the swell of elation and then the debilitating crush of a possible second rejection worked its way through him where he stood. “It didn’t matter if you ended up feeling like you needed to create something with Grace for those kids; it didn’t change what I knew I felt, how I’ve always felt, about you. It wouldn’t have been right to let Darren think I could ever develop the kinds of feeling for him that I already feel with you.”
Devlin let go and stripped off his shirt. As the shock of white cotton drifted through the shadows to the floor, Devlin lifted Garrick’s hand, put it against his heart, and let Garrick feel the beat that pounded inside Devlin just for him. “I love you, Gradyn, Denny or Garrick, no matter what your name is.” Husky thickness coated Devlin’s words. “And I don’t see that ever changing.”
A hoarse noise that almost didn’t register as human escaped Garrick. He pulled his fingers out of Devlin’s ass and clutched his face, dragging him close. Garrick’s eyes burned too bright, breaking Devlin’s heart, but Devlin swore he could see the green hiding within the watery blue.
Garrick dipped down and grazed his mouth across Devlin’s, and then did it again, and again, clinging each time, as if unable to let go. Devlin dug his fingers into Garrick’s arms, squeezing into the solid, warm flesh, and moaned at the first flick of their tongues. Heat surged straight down to Devlin’s prick and pushed his length out to poke against Garrick’s thigh. The greedy nerve endings on his cockhead demanded more, and as Devlin licked his way into Garrick’s mouth for a deeper taste, he shoved his sweats down to his ankles, kicked them off, and seared himself to Garrick’s front from top to bottom. He rubbed himself all over the other man, needing skin-to-skin on more than just his stiff dick.
“Oh shit.” Garrick gasped and stumbled backward, hauling Devlin with him into the door. “You feel so good.” He tunneled his fingers into Devlin’s hair, jerked his head back, and descended, taking Devlin with a rougher kiss. What started out with a nip that drew a pinch of blood only increased in brutality as Garrick’s deep kiss of complete ownership consumed Devlin inside and out.
Devlin groaned and threw himself into Garrick with equal fervor, kissing him back in a way that scraped and hurt, but that he knew they both needed to feel right now. His entire being flamed inside, hungry and achy. Devlin ground himself against Garrick’s body with everything he was worth, searching for relief. He shoved the man’s hand back down to his asshole and tried to force a taking. Any taking. “Please.” He licked at Garrick, and the sharp metallic bite of his own blood assaulted his taste buds.
Garrick drew back just a sliver. He kept his hand curled tightly around Devlin’s neck as he looked into his eyes; his breathing was uneven and his lips were red from a combination of aggression and a tinge of Devlin’s blood. Choppy tufts of his long, dark hair fell across his face, the strands brushing against Devlin’s skin.
“Christ, I love you, beautiful.” Garrick’s pupils sparked black ice, and a flash of feral grin appeared. “I want you forever.” He brushed his lips across Devlin’s again, tormenting Devlin with just a whisper of contact. With his other hand, Garrick pushed half a finger into Devlin’s passage. He maintained constant eye contact, watching, almost uncomfortably so, and then without quarter tripled his penetration into Devlin’s channel with another two fingers at the same time.
“Ohh yes...” Devlin hissed as his body worked to accept the extra thickness. “Me too.” His rectum closed in tight on Garrick’s buried fingers and pulsed in a fast pattern that milked the length, making Devlin bite his lip to hold back a scream. “About you.”
Garrick eased his fingers deeper inside Devlin, just a hair, and Devlin felt the slight caress all the way in his fucking toes. A brushing glance slid over his prostate, almost a phantom sensation, but Devlin groaned and rolled into the invasion as if it were a full-on assault. Garrick massaged Devlin’s neck and anal muscles at the same time, murmuring explicit words of encouragement with each touch, and Devlin rocked into him like an animal denied his loving master for too many years.
The masterful fingering of Devlin’s ass; Garrick’s constant, brushing kisses against Devlin forehead; the way Garrick plied the tendons in Devlin’s neck that went all the way down Devlin’s spine, straight to his chute, drove Devlin quickly to the brink. “Holy fuck,” Devlin bit down the urge to come, “you always knew how to kill me.”
Slipping too fast, Devlin hooked his hands around the waistband of Garrick’s shorts, ripped the material open, and tore them down his legs. Thick, hot cock fell right into Devlin’s hands, scorching his flesh with a wonderful, familiar burn. Devlin closed his fingers tightly, taking Garrick’s prick and sac in his hands, and gave both a good rub and tug.
Garrick sucked in a deep, sharp breath, and he dug the back of his head into the door. “Oh shit. Reality feels too good, beautiful.”
Devlin ran a trimmed fingernail into Garrick’s slit, and Garrick bucked and gritted his teeth. Devlin did it a second time, and Garrick jerked again as he produced a fat bead of seed. “Devlin,” Garrick sounded winded, “you’re gonna make me come.”
No! Devlin nearly buckled as an onslaught of denial tore through him.
“Control it.” Devlin reached back, ripped Garrick’s fingers out of his asshole, and shoved him fully into the door. “Just like you once told me to do.” Devlin tried to climb up Garrick’s body, frantic and losing control himself. “Fuck me.” He looked into Garrick’s eyes as desperation roughened the texture of his voice. “Right here.” He wrapped his arms around Garrick’s shoulders and pulled himself up, locking his legs around Garrick’s waist. “Right now.”
Blue fire flared in Garrick’s eyes. “Christ, yes.” Garrick hooked his arms under Devlin’s thighs and fused their mouths together. “Hold on.” His words went into Devlin between tantalizing licks of their tongues that quickly turned into a voracious, raw kiss. Devlin clutched at Garrick, clinging with his thighs and arms, kissing him back. Garrick started moving and blindly bumped them into something that stabbed cold metal into Devlin’s back, making him “Umph” and Garrick mutter, “Sorry.”
Devlin smiled against Garrick’s lips. “It’s okay.” The man’s cock rode right against Devlin’s balls and taint, though, and pushed Devlin disastrously close to the edge. “Just put me down somewhere and fuck me now.”
Just as Devlin demanded that, Garrick hoisted him onto a counter, stole his breath with a biting kiss, and drove his cock deep into Devlin’s ass.
Both men cried out, shuddered as one, and then went absolutely still.
Sweet Mary. Devlin’s passage squeezed in a series of exquisite throbbing waves around Garrick’s rock-solid bare cock. He’s not wearing a condom.
Garrick’s jaw dropped, his eyes closed, and his hands curled into fists against the edge of the counter. He looked like he fought through an epic battle before opening his eyes and facing Devlin again. “Jesus Christ,” Garrick whispered. Devlin moved, just an inch, and Garrick abruptly bit off a curse, his jaw clenching. “I didn’t even think.”
Devlin locked his ankles around Garrick’s back and held him fully buried inside. “Me either, but I’m okay.” He brushed the tips of his finge
rs against Garrick’s jaw, reveling in the rough stubble. His thumb caught the edge of Garrick’s incredible mouth. The man’s gasp of response brought Devlin’s attention up to his eyes and pulled another confession out of his soul. “There hasn’t been anyone since you.”
“No one?” Those blue eyes somehow swirled green throughout again, and the light within Garrick’s gaze took away the last remnants of fear in Devlin’s heart.
Devlin shook his head. “Not like this. I’ve only made love with you.”
“I’m good too. I couldn’t be with anyone after you,” Garrick told him. “My life didn’t allow it.” His jaw tensed visibly again, stopping him. He uncurled his fists from the counter and dropped his focus to watch himself rub his palms up and down the outside of Devlin’s thighs. “It doesn’t matter, though. Even if I could have, I don’t think I could have settled for less after what I had with you.”
“Then don’t stop.” With a couple of fingers under his chin, Devlin drew Garrick’s face out of hiding and offered him a gentle smile. “We’ve both waited too long to stop now.”
Garrick darted out his tongue and delivered a fast lick to the inside of Devlin’s wrist. His eyes danced with humor and heat, and he yanked Devlin’s ass right up to the edge of the counter. “Put your feet up on the counter. Spread for me, beautiful.” Garrick helped Devlin unwind his legs from around Garrick’s waist, plant his feet on the scratched Formica, and in doing so put the connection of their bodies on full display. “Christ,” he looked down and added another curse, “I needed to see us like this again.” With that, Garrick sent a shiver through Devlin’s chute as he slid his thick cock out of Devlin’s ass completely, left him open and bereft for a pair of heartbeats, and then pierced Devlin’s hole again, and slowly, oh-so-fucking-slowly, filled Devlin to the root.
Devlin gasped as Garrick pulled out and teased the head of his prick over Devlin’s perineum and stretched entrance, rubbed the shiny red tip up to Devlin’s balls, and then returned to Devlin’s opening and sank his length back through the snug hold of Devlin’s fluttering passage.
