by Nate Allen
a little too much of your hand. I know that many people don’t want the property, in fear of ghosts, or something ridiculous like that. And I know if I passed on the deal, it would drop even further in price. If I were to wait even a month or so it would probably be closer to eighty.” I pause to read the waters of D. He is solid, as if he wanted me to catch all the subtleties of the deal to begin with. A test maybe? “But, you have been honest with me and I appreciate it. I want to make a deal today. I have an offer for you. I think it’s fair. I get this property and in exchange I timeshare my beach for six months out of every year. You can lease it with Angie, and whatever they want to do they can do.”
“You drive a hard bargain, Andrew.” he says with his face held in thought.
“I’m not done, D. I want a car. A nice one. One that I can actually drive off of the property.”
“Anything else?”
“I don’t know. Is there anything else you’re willing to throw in?”
He looks over at me, nodding his head with approval. I think he is impressed.
9
Of all the skies I have seen, this truly is the most beautiful. The mansion is still a slight blur from where we’re at, but the sky is all consuming. It’s all I can look at. It is an angry setting, a masterpiece for the powerful. The ocean is gray and ferocious, waves upon waves. A great battle is taking place.
I can see why this scares many people. The feeling of imminent danger is in every inch, and that’s what makes it so thrilling. It looks as if it could explode at any moment, reminiscent of the image of a mushroom cloud after a nuclear bomb. The colors are pale and disturbing. Pea soup green with sickly orange stirred into a palette of grays and blacks. And everything is outlined in sharp, piercing light. Just looking at it fills me with desire.
“Do I get this view from the master bedroom?” I ask, thinking about what I will do with my commodities as soon as D leaves me to it.
“The view is stunning from the master bedroom. You have a huge bay window that faces the water, so the sky is like one big picture.” he says as he begins to slow the car down to park it in the driveway.
“Perfect.”
The property is incredible. The mansion is older than I expected it to be. I was picturing something more modern, something that the newest movie star would have: a sleek, almost futuristic look. But, this fits the whole piece of land better. It’s a tall house with tall windows in the front. It’s dark blue or an off gray with dark red shutters. Old columns stand at the entrance of a large black double door. A little to the right of the entrance a staircase leads up to a large swimming pool that overlooks the water. Built under the house where the driveway leads is a huge garage. There are two doors, but it clearly holds more.
“In love, Andrew?” D asks as he gets out of the car.
“It’s better than I imagined. Different but better.” I get out too. The air is warm, but the wind from the water is chilled. A clap of thunder rumbles over the water and a flash of lightning follows. Every one of my senses spring into action. This property feels so unstable, so sure to be destroyed one day. And strangely, that’s part of the charm. Men of power live on the edge. They make enemies and have few friends. They are pioneers, alone in their quest and usually are as unstable as the waves themselves. I would rather be here than some place warm and always inviting. “If you can get me a car, we have a deal.”
“I should be able to work something out.” he says as he stretches his arms out to feel the wind. “This place does something to you, doesn’t it?”
“It sure does, D.” I smile as I look out at what I’m about to call mine. “When can we get this deal done?”
“I’ll call my secretary right now.” he pulls out an old flip phone. “What color? What kind?”
“For a car?”
He nods as he dials a certain set of numbers.
“Convertible. Reddish-orange, if you have it.”
He nods again, now with his phone pressed to his ear.
I walk away from him as he starts talking to his secretary. There is more exploring to do. The driveway forks off halfway down. The right leads to the garage, the left leads to a large deck behind the house, that then opens up to tall grass on the edge of the cliff. The drop would be fatal. There is no stairway leading down. There is no beach. There are just brutal waves pounding the jagged rocks.
D really would have taken me for a ride had I not been paying attention. This water is setting, nothing more. Luckily, I’m holding onto my beach getaway as well. Otherwise, I would be feeling very taken advantage of. I guess there really is no such thing as an honest salesman…
10
I don’t know why I am starting to feel hesitant about this deal. I don’t know why fear more than power is starting to attach itself to me. Is it because I can’t fully trust D? What will he benefit by deceiving me? What motive does he have?
I can’t shake the feeling that something is missing. But, I don’t know what it could be. Soon I’ll have a nice new car. I can visit my beach property six months out of every year. I have a literal rolodex of women just waiting inside. I should be thrilled with everything I have, but—
“The car is on its way!” D says from somewhere behind me. “My secretary is bringing it as quickly as she can. Reddish-orange, a beautiful color.”
“Okay.” I say quietly as I look down at the water.
“Is something wrong, Andrew?”
“No.” I look back towards him and then at the house. I can see the big bay window. It’s on the second floor, directly above the deck. “Nothing’s wrong. It’s as you said, ‘This place does something to you.’”
D smiles as he touches my shoulder. “Why don’t we take a look inside?”
I nod as I follow him back toward the house.
Whatever hesitation I had is gone. Whatever fear there was has faded. My cold feet have warmed. For a moment I was slipping back into the stupid, weak skin of who I was. This place is intimidating. It is the opposite from comforting. It doesn’t feel safe or secure. Of course the old me would want to run. Of course the old me wants the warm beach with nothing but sunlight, where the waves softly slide onto the shore.
The pieces people bring with them are not just landmarks, they are reflections of who they are. I can’t be that stupid man from the beach. I can’t be that man anymore. He was pathetic. He was spit on, stepped on, laughed at, a joke if there ever was one. There is something to be said about a man of power. He may not have many friends in his life but he does have respect…
… That’s what I’m missing. That’s what I need. I can barter for everything I’d ever want and still need more, because my image is wrapped up in how I am seen by others. I don’t know a lot about myself, but I know this: I need recognition. I need respect. And I won’t stop until I’ve earned it.
There are those who can lay back and enjoy this “paradise” with no worries. But, I have one huge hole in me. And until it’s filled, I will never be happy. I will never be able to sit back and relax.
I am going to pass on the commodities offered, not because I don’t want to have sex with gorgeous women, but because those women belonged to Mr. Ericson. I don’t want a powerful man’s leftovers. That’s more pathetic than having no one. Instead, I am going to find a gorgeous woman for myself, one who respects me, one who I can’t control. She won’t be a figment of someone else’s mind. I will earn her affection. When she looks at me she’ll see a man of great power. And she’ll want me for me.
“If you decide not to add commodities to your property, does the price go down?” I ask as we’re about to walk inside.
“You don’t want the women?” D seems taken aback. “Who wouldn’t want the women? Especially these women? They are some of the most beautiful in existence.”
“I don’t doubt it. But, I want something that’s mine.”
“What are you talking about, Andrew? You sign the papers and they are yours. And they don’t disappo—”
“Just answer th
e question, D. Does the price go down?”
“Yeah, quite a bit. But, they are worth the extra money. I assure you.”
“That isn’t what I’m worried about. I want to make a name for myself, in a way that I was never able to do before.”
“How do you plan on doing that?”
“With the money I save, I’m going to timeshare a third piece of land. I’m going to be a titan of industry. Like I said, I’m a businessman too. I’m not going to need the leftovers from someone else’s fantasies. I’m going to earn everything I get. I’m going to earn respect. And this place is where it begins.”
“That’s really something,” D says as he clicks his tongue in surprise. “I admire you, Andrew. But, I can’t say you won’t be missing out. I also can’t say I would do the same thing. You’re a stronger man than I am.”
“No. I just don’t want to settle for a dead man’s fantasies. Something on the side doesn’t apply if you don’t truly have anything to begin with. You said it yourself, Angie is a commodity. She is not waiting for me to come back to the beach. I have no one right now, D. But, it won’t be that way for long.”
“I believe you, Andrew.” he sighs as he scratches his head. “There are a few pieces of land I can show you tomorrow that would be covered by what you have left over. Anything particular in mind?”
“Someplace populated.”
11
We entered the house through the deck door, immediately finding a large bar area in the
