by Marie Harte
Brandon’s eyes widened.
“You want one?”
“Yes, please.”
Again with the manners. Nice kid. “Here you go.” While Brandon neatly removed the wrapper, Lou put the rest of the bars away, then explained the situation. “Okay, Brandon. Here’s the deal. Until your mom gets your furniture in, you guys are gonna stay with me. Okay?”
Brandon looked a little unsure, though he nodded and nibbled at his ice cream.
So innocent and small. He called to all of Lou’s protective instincts. “It’s okay. I have a guest room all made up for you. I even packed you some clothes from your new place. It’s pretty neat, your new house. Do you like it?”
Brandon gave a shy smile. “I have my own room now.”
“You’re lucky. I had to share a room with my sisters until I was fifteen.”
“You have sisters?”
“Five of them. My youngest sister is near your age. Rosie’s eight.”
Brandon stared at Lou. “Really?”
Lou smiled. “Really. My mom loves babies.”
“Do you have any?”
“Um, no.” Not yet was on the tip of his tongue. Which made little sense.
“My mom loves babies too. She loves me a lot.”
“I know. She told me.”
Brandon nodded. “It’s good she has friends now. For a long time, she had old-people friends. Like Grandma and Grandpa. And Stef and Tonya. They work with her. Well, and Ms. Becky. Now you. That’s it.”
Lou blinked. “How about Del?”
“Oh yeah. Her too. And some guy named Felix. I’m going to meet him this week. She thinks I might like him.” Brandon leaned closer and whispered, “Don’t tell, but I heard her tell Ms. Becky she likes you a lot. Maybe like-like. Kissy-like.” Brandon grinned.
“I see.” He totally didn’t and needed to talk to Joey. She was talking to Felix? Did she still have a thing for the guy? Or was it all about Brandon? And why, when Lou had been adamant about not dealing with kids who weren’t his own, did he suddenly feel the need to watch over Brandon?
“I’m done.” Brandon held his ice cream wrapper. “Where can I throw this away?”
“You clean up after yourself too? Are you real?”
Brandon chuckled. “That’s what my grandma says.”
Lou pointed to the trash can and watched the boy throw the wrapper away. “Come on, kid. Let me show you your room. It’s getting late, and I think you have a bedtime, right?”
“Maybe. Sometimes I don’t. I think tonight I can stay up a long time, in fact.”
Thank God. The kid was human after all.
After Lou showed Brandon the spare room, complete with the kiddie night-light Rosie always used and some spare stuffed animals she’d left behind, he said, “I’ll be sleeping on the couch if you need me.”
“Not with Mom?”
Lou almost choked on his answer. “Ah, no. Why? Do her friends usually sleep in her bed?”
“Oh, no. Mom never has sleepovers. But I slept in Colin’s room. Todd’s too.”
“Well, if your mom wasn’t sick, you could sleep in her room with her.”
Brandon made a face. “Nah. I love Mom. But we always share the same room. I want my own room from now on.” He paused. “But it has that little light, right?”
Lou nodded. She’d shared a room with her son? No wonder the woman never had sleepovers.
An hour later, he had Brandon in bed, confounded when told he needed to read the boy a story. So he found one of Rosie’s old Barbie books and proceeded to replace all the girlie parts with things that blew up or raced on two wheels.
By the end, Brandon looked pleased but sleepy, hugging Rosie’s second-favorite stuffed owl.
“You take care of Owlie, okay?” Lou said to Brandon, who hugged the ratty thing tighter.
“I will.”
Lou leaned down and kissed the boy’s forehead before thinking the better of it. Something he always did with Rosie.
“G’night, Lou.”
Pride, affection, and warmth stole through him as he looked at the blond head snuggling into the pillow. Just like his mother down the hall. “Buenas noches, Brandon.”
Brandon smiled, yawned, and closed his eyes.
And Lou spent one uncomfortable night on the couch, but it was nothing next to the chaos that became his morning.
* * *
“So then what?” Becky asked, slurping her coffee and staring at Joey.
They sat together at the park drinking coffee Thursday evening while Brandon and Felix walked around, talking.
“So I woke up in the middle of the night, not sure what the heck was going on. I find Brandon all tucked in bed in Lou’s spare room, hugging a stuffed animal not his own.”
Becky goggled. “Lou’s?”
“Probably his little sister’s. Then I find Lou on the couch looking uncomfortable. Becky, he took care of me all weekend. He picked up my son, for God’s sake. And he tried to act like it was no big deal the next day. I’m freaking out because we’re late and we don’t have what we need for school or work. He just takes charge, showing Brandon how to work the shower, handing him clothes he’d picked up. Then he took me aside, looked me over, and slapped me on the ass. Proclaimed me all better and showed me how to work his shower, gave me my clothes, and made us breakfast. It was surreal.”
And an experience she wanted to replay for the rest of her days. She’d felt so normal and domestic. Mom and dad and boy getting ready for their Monday morning.
Lou had looked especially handsome in his jeans and tee, a hint of his tattoo showing. Brandon already thought him the most awesome man in the world. Not only did Lou have an awesome car, speak Spanish, and draw, he also loved soccer.
And so Tuesday and Wednesday morning followed the same pattern. Brandon went to an after-school program she could now afford. She picked him up after work, drove them to their new apartment, where they continued to settle in, then Lou would show up with dinner and help her put together the IKEA furniture she’d purchased, and they’d all go back to Lou’s to sleep.
“I feel like we’re growing closer. All of us.”
“But no sex since you were sick?” Becky asked.
That bothered her. Still did, in fact. “No. We transitioned from lovers to domestic partners with no problem. Brandon loves Lou. I mean, I thought he might have a little problem adapting to a man in my life. Even if he is just ‘a friend.’ But Brandon doesn’t want to go back home and leave Lou. He told me that today.”
Becky laughed. “Nice. Lou has won over the boy without trying.” She paused. “Still no word from your parents?”
“My mother left me a voice mail. She apologized, and she sounds sincere. I guess. No word from Dad.”
“No news is good news.” Becky shrugged. “And Felix? How’s that going?”
She watched father and son walking together, pointing at things on the ground and in the trees. “Felix and I have come to an understanding. He wants to get to know Brandon, to be a friend first, a father second. He made a few hints about seeing where he and I might be today. But I shut that down quick.”
“Oh?”
“I told him I had a man in my life and was happy. And he left it at that.”
“Simple enough. If you believe it.”
“What does he have to gain? To try to get back with me to get Brandon? I doubt that.”
“So you’re really buying his born-again misery crap?”
“What?”
“Well, not religious born-again. More like he realized what an asshole he was, and he’s now reborn. Kind of.”
Joey shook her head at her friend. “Kind of.”
They watched Brandon and Felix. “So what are you going to do about loving Lou?”
Joey groaned. “I don’t k
now. What should I do?”
“Maybe have an honest conversation with the guy? I mean, you are living with him.”
“Not really. We’re putting Brandon’s bed together tonight.”
“Oh, we’re up to beds.” Becky rubbed her hands together.
Joey sighed. “I wish.”
“You need to talk to him. Don’t be one of those TSTL heroines in a bad novel.”
“Too Stupid To Live?”
“To Stupid To Love.” Becky nodded. “Just because my love happened to turn to God doesn’t mean yours will.”
“I still don’t see how you know this guy is a priest.”
“Um, he wore a priest thingie? That white collar block at his throat? That?”
“Maybe he was going to a costume party.”
“Nah, he’s always nice.” She sighed. “He found God. I’m so screwed.”
Joey tried not to laugh.
Later that evening, after she and Lou had put Brandon’s bed together and Brandon had talked and talked about his time with Felix, they drove back to Lou’s house in silence, the radio their only companion.
Brandon soon went to bed, and the new routine consisted of Joey kissing him good night followed by Lou coming in to ruffle his hair, then add a kiss to Brandon’s forehead. Each time she saw it, her heart gave a leap. And she fell that much more in love with Lou.
Half an hour later, after watching some television on Lou’s current bed—the couch—she turned to him. “We need to talk.”
He nodded. “I agree.”
Nervous but willing to put herself out there, she started. “Me first.”
“Fine.”
He didn’t look happy, and she wasn’t sure she should go through with it. But then she knew she had to. “Lou, I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done to help.”
He shrugged. “No biggie.”
“No, it is a big deal. You helped me. You helped my son.” She moved closer to hug him. But to her dismay, he didn’t hug her back. “Lou?”
“I’ve been thinking.”
“The three words a woman never wants to hear,” she teased, thinking Becky would love that line.
Lou didn’t smile back. “I think it would be best if you and Brandon moved back home tomorrow.”
She wanted to cry. “I know you said you didn’t want children in your life. I respect that, but I—” His pained look stopped her, and she was glad, because she didn’t know what else she might have said.
“It’s not him. Well, partly it is.” Lou ran his hand through his hair. “The boy is awesome. He’s sweet, polite, so cute, and a helluva soccer player.” Lou swallowed. “Hell, Joey. I want to keep being around to see him, but I’m not his father.”
“I never said you were.”
“No. Felix is. And he’s trying to bond with Brandon. Me being in the way isn’t helping.”
Joey frowned. “I know my son and what’s best for him. Being friends with you doesn’t detract from what he can have with Felix.”
“You’re too close to the situation. You don’t understand. The boy needs his father.”
“Excuse me?” Was he saying she wasn’t caring for her son? “He’s been just fine without a father for nearly nine long years, Lou.”
“That came out wrong.” He swore in Spanish. “Joey, I lo—” He started coughing. “Sorry. I like you. A lot. But you have a son to think about. And, well, I have a life to get back to.”
Joey was hurt. “Don’t you care about me?”
“Of course I do.”
“Then why can’t we try to be together? All of us?” She’d seen his affection for her son. She knew it wasn’t her pushing for a relationship that wasn’t there. “Or is this because you think I’d have you raising him? I hate it, but I understand if you don’t want this responsibility. It’s mine, and I’m fine with it being mine.”
“But it’s not. It’s Felix’s too. And you guys need to work that out. Don’t put me in the middle of it.”
“I’m not.” She stared. “I’m confused. Are you saying you don’t want to be with me? You don’t”—she put it all on the line—“love me?”
He blew out a breath. “See. This shouldn’t be about you and me. It’s about Brandon. He should come first, Joey.”
“Okay, that came out exactly the way you meant it to, didn’t it?”
“Yeah.” He crossed his massive arms over his chest. “It did. I’m sorry if it sounds judgy, but it’s true. Woman gets interested in a man, and her kids fall to the wayside. I’ve seen it too many times, even in good women.”
“Lou?” she said sweetly, enraged that he could possibly find fault in her parenting. Hell, everything she’d ever done with her life had been for Brandon’s sake. Everything except Lou. And he meant to punish her for it?
“I’m sorry, but that’s the way I feel.”
She stared at him, so disappointed, she wanted to cry. After she slapped him in the head. “You don’t know me at all.” Then she turned on her heel and went back to his bedroom. She gathered her clothes and took them and herself to sleep with Brandon. She wouldn’t spend one more night in Lou’s big bed, alone, hoping for him to return. Not when he obviously considered her a piss-poor mother who put sex ahead of her baby boy.
No. She and Brandon were leaving tomorrow. And Lou Cortez would rue the day he’d sat in judgment of her. Because he’d ruined the best thing he could have had. Joey and her son.
She wiped her tears and joined Brandon in the small bed.
Time to stop dreaming and start living again.
Chapter 22
Stella had had it up to here with her mopey brother. Why he let some stupid woman break his heart, stomped all to pieces… She had been warned by everyone, Abuela too, to leave well enough alone. Well, screw that.
The Cortez family had been stepped on one too many times. Man. Joey had a son? An ex-baby daddy floating around? She hated that Joey had fucked Lou over. Her brother might not show it, but he had a heart of gold. He cared for all of them. Hell, he’d taken care of Joey’s kid without having been asked. She’d heard all about it from her mama, after Mama had heard about it from Del after dropping off some cookies at the shop. God forbid Lou tell them anything.
He just walked around, not eating, pale, losing weight, like he’d caught the goddamn love plague. For two weeks he’d been the walking wounded, and she’d had enough.
She parked her car near Joey’s address and waited across the street near the park. That’s when she saw them. Joey sitting away from the man and boy walking together.
The kid had to be hers. He had her face stamped on his, but with blond hair, like the guy’s. And yeah, a bit of the guy on the boy’s face too.
Stella left the car and angled toward the woods, on the trail, out of sight of Joey but close enough to overhear the conversation between the man and the boy.
“…so she’s sad?” the man asked, his voice deep.
“Yeah. I can’t help her either. She hides the crying.” The boy sounded on the verge of tears, pulling Stella’s heartstrings. It helped to know Joey was miserable.
“I’m so sorry, Brandon. I wish I could help.”
“Be her friend, Felix. Tell her to talk to Lou. I bet he’d talk to her if she’d call him.” Brandon paused, kicked a rock. “He said he’d take me to a Sounders game someday.”
“Yeah? That’s nice.” Felix walked with the boy. They neared Stella, so she kept her attention on the water, subtly turning her back to the pair. “Hey, you want me to talk to him?”
“Yes, please. That would be really great.” Brandon sniffed. “What if Mom gets so sad she gets heartsick? And she might leave me? My dad did. He got sick of me.”
Felix paused. She felt for him, because that had to be a real kick in the nuts, hearing your kid tell you he knew you’d abandoned him.
“Oh. I should stay around then.”
“Yes. Definitely.” She saw Felix pat him on the shoulder. And she noticed how very attractive the man was. Wow. Like, all-American, Caucasian hotness.
“And something else,” he was saying as he knelt to look into the boy’s eyes. “There has never, ever, been anything wrong with you or your mom. Anyone who says there is has something wrong with them.”
“Like Grandpa?”
“Why do you say that?”
“He said mean things to Mom, and now they’re taking a time-out from each other. Grandma was nasty too, but she apologized. So Mom said she has to be gracious and accept Grandma’s apologies. Because when you’re wrong, you say you’re sorry. And if you mean it, you get forgiven. That’s grace.”
Stella eyed Joey sitting apart, alone, small, and feeling dejected from her parents. And Stella’s brother? If she was into Lou, why had Joey dumped him? It made no sense. Sure, Felix was sexy, but Joey didn’t sound like she was into him anymore.
Felix continued. “So if I did something wrong, say, to you. I should apologize with my whole heart, and you’d forgive me?” he asked, his voice thick.
“Yes.” Brandon nodded and put hand on his Felix’s shoulder. “I’d forgive you. Dad.”
Felix blinked at his son, and as the moment settled, Stella felt tears prick her eyes.
“Damn. I mean, darn. You’re too smart for me.” Felix laughed and wiped his eyes.
“I am smart. Super smart.” Brandon nodded. “Besides, we have the same hair.”
“I guess we do.” Felix sighed. “I’m so sorry I left you guys. It was the biggest mistake I ever made in my life. And I haven’t been whole without you, Brandon. If you’ll let me, I’d like to be your friend.”
“That would be good. Do you think you could like soccer?”
