He looked out into the darkness and his nostrils flared. The coyote was out there. Watching, waiting. Confident that, sooner or later, his time would come.
Cullen's lips drew back in a snarl. "Not yet, my friend. Not yet. I'm going to fool you. Because I'm going to get out of here." His quiet words rang with confidence.
He couldn't afford to believe anything else.
Chapter 9
Sara felt as if her emotions had fallen into two separate compartments. There was the part of her that never stopped worrying about Cullen. Wondering if he was safe, if he was hurt, if he was warm enough. And then there was the part that could think of nothing but Cody. The scent of him, the taste of his skin, the feel of his hands, the smoky sound of his voice.
She felt guilty about being so absorbed in Cody when Cullen's safety was uncertain, but the emotions that Cody drew out in her were too powerful, too driving, for guilt to suppress them. Whether or not she got involved with Cody, it had no effect on Cullen. In her more honest moments she admitted that she had little choice about her relationship with Cody. Like a wildfire that burned out of control, he'd swept aside any feeble barriers she might have put up.
When they left the cave and started on the day's journey, everything was just as it had been for the past few days with one major exception. Dog ranged ahead as he always had, and Cody rode Dancer at the head of their little parade just as he always had, but now Sara rode next to Cody. Dancer and Satin paced side hy side, so close that Sara's knee brushed Cody's.
If they each felt the need for a bit of emotional distance, Sara felt an equal need for physical closeness. And Cody obviously didn't object. Once mounted, he turned to look over their little group and, as he faced forward, his eyes caught Sara's studying him. The slow smile that curved his mouth sent a jolt through her and she felt almost mesmerized as he nudged the stallion closer. His long fingers curved around the back of her neck, and she leaned out of the saddle to meet his kiss, as eager for the contact as he was.
Without a word he drew away, his eyes lingering on the swollen softness of her mouth. It seemed an effort for him to force his gaze away from her. His heel tapped Dancer's barrel and the bay obediently started forward. They rode for almost an hour in silence. There didn't seem to be any need for words.
Sara let her thoughts roam without conscious direction. The events of the night before were foremost in her thoughts, but she refused to examine them too closely. Her feelings for Cody were too new and too frightening. She wasn't quite ready to face them in the sharp light of day. Her cheeks flushed with the memory of their lovemaking, and she could only hope that Cody's unusual gifts did not extend to mind reading.
Their physical union had been extraordinarily satisfying. Looking back, Sara blushed at thoughts of her behavior. She'd not only accepted his demands, she'd made demands of her own. He'd delved deep and tapped a vein of sensuality she hadn't even known existed. Certainly David had never brought out that explosive passion.
David. Some of the remembered glow faded from her eyes. Just where did David fit in now? He'd been the farthest thing from her mind last night. In fact, she hadn't really thought about him since meeting Cody Wolf. She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to conjure up David's image. But it was faded and blurred around the edges, like an old, out-of-focus print. Her eyes snapped open and her gloved hands tightened on the reins. Satin hesitated a moment and Sara loosened her grip, letting the mare set the pace necessary to hold them next to Dancer.
David. Dear, sweet David. He was the first photographer she'd worked with, and his patience and encouragement had been a major impetus to her career.
A year ago she and David had moved from being friends to being lovers. There'd been no fireworks, no long soul searching. It had seemed a natural progression in their relationship. And a month ago he'd asked her to marry him. She loved David. She didn't doubt that, and in her more logical moments, she couldn't figure out why she had put off his marriage proposal. He was one of the sweetest men she'd ever met. He loved her. He loved Cullen. Why on earth was she hesitating?
But there'd been something inside that kept her from saying yes. Something that insisted that there had to be more to marriage than the gentle love she felt for David. There should be excitement, fire. Fire. That described her feelings for Cody Wolf perfectly. When he touched her, he set her ablaze. Her mouth twisted. She'd found the fire that was missing with David. Now, all she had to do was see that it didn't consume her.
Cody glanced at his silent companion and his mouth tightened. Her eyes were fixed ahead, but he didn't think she was seeing anything that lay in front of her. Her gaze was focused inward, on things he couldn't see. He'd been afraid that she might want to poke and prod and examine their relationship from every angle. He'd dreaded that she might ask questions he wasn't yet ready to even hear, let alone give answers to. But now that she rode beside him so silently, he found himself irritated by her silence.
"You're thinking about him, aren't you?"
Sara blinked, snapping out of her reverie to focus on Cody. "Cullen? Not consciously."
"The man in Los Angeles."
"What!"
Sara's fingers tightened so suddenly that Satin danced sideways in confusion. Sara loosened her grip and leaned forward to murmur a few words of apology to the mare as they fell back in beside Cody.
Her eyes met his, but she could read nothing in those guarded green depths. The brim of his hat shadowed his face, making it impossible to judge his expression with any accuracy.
"What are you talking about?"
His eyes slanted toward her. "There is a man in Los Angeles, isn't there?"
She hesitated a long moment before nodding slowly. "Yes. But I've never mentioned him. How did you know about him?"
"Nothing mystical. I've seen you carefully taking your birth control pill every morning."
Sara flushed, irritated and embarrassed. Was there nothing he missed seeing? "Maybe I just like to be prepared." There was a distinct snap to her voice.
Cody didn't even have the grace to pretend to consider the matter. He shook his head, his eyes focused ahead. "Not you. If you're taking precautions, it's because you've got a reason for it. Why do you think I didn't ask about it last night? Did you think I would make love to you if I hadn't known you were protected?"
She blinked, and the color in her cheeks deepened until she felt as if her face were on fire. Now that he mentioned it, she hadn't even wondered about that. She'd like to think it was because she knew she was safe from pregnancy. Of course she'd have thought of it otherwise. That's what she wanted to believe. But there was a nagging little voice that suggested that last night she hadn't cared about anything but the feel of his body.
"I hadn't really thought about it," she muttered. She tugged her hat lower with one gloved hand and tried to pretend that the conversation was ended. Maybe he would take the hint.
"Were you thinking about him?" His tone was one of casual inquiry, but Sara had the feeling that he wasn't going to let the subject drop without getting an answer.
"As a matter of fact, I was thinking of him. Is that what you wanted to hear?"
His worn leather jacket creaked with the movement of his shoulders as he shrugged. "What's he like?"
As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wished he could call them back. Not only were they an intrusion into her privacy, but he didn't want to hear the answer anyway. He'd been struggling against admitting his anger from the first moment he'd realized that she was taking birth control pills. An illogical, unreasonable anger that ate at his gut. Last night had pushed the flames of that anger even higher.
He hated the thought of another man touching her. The intensity of that feeling told him more than anything else that he was getting in too deep. She'd entwined herself into his emotions in a way that no one else had ever managed.
"I'm sorry. That's none of my business."
"No, it isn't. My life before I met you is only my concern.
"
"You're right. I had no right to ask."
"Then why did you?"
Dancer sidled uneasily in answer to the tension in Cody's hands. Silence lay heavily between them and Sara thought he was going to ignore the question. When he spoke his voice was level, but she could hear strain in the husky tones.
"I guess there's a masochistic streak in me that I've never noticed before." He didn't look at her and Sara could read nothing in his profile.
"Does it bother you to think of me with David?" she probed.
"It makes me want to kill him." His tone was so even, almost casual, that it took her a moment to realize what he'd said. Before she could respond—and what would she have said?—Cody drew Dancer to a halt and nodded to the right.
"We're going to have to go up there."
Sara dragged her eyes from his face, wishing that he wasn't quite so good at concealing his feelings. But their conversation slid to the back of her mind when she saw what he was indicating. To their left the mountains eased into a shallow valley; riding through it would be smooth and easy—the biggest danger was the possibility of a horse putting a foot in a rabbit hole.
To their right the mountain rose abruptly, as if it had its roots in the little valley. The "there" that Cody was indicating was a narrow path that wound up the side of the mountain. From where she sat, Sara thought that the path looked as if it might have room for a very small mountain goat, but that it certainly wouldn't give enough support to allow four horses and two humans and a large dog to travel on it.
She swallowed hard. "Are you sure?"
"I'm sure." Cody studied her suddenly pale face for a moment before offering her a way out. "If you don't want to try it, you could camp right here while I go on. We've got enough supplies to split them up."
She was already shaking her head. "I'm going with you."
He shrugged. "It's up to you." He swung his leg over the saddle and slid off Dancer's back. "We'll eat some lunch here. I want to make sure everything is secure before we tackle that path."
Sara slipped out of the saddle and moved to help him with the noon meal, trying not to look at the trail they would be taking later. Her appetite was nonexistent, and she surreptitiously fed most of her lunch to Dog, who didn't look at all worried about what was coming up.
"That's easy for you to say. There's enough room for you up there. Just what am I supposed to do?" Dog blinked at her silently, his long pink tongue licking the last traces of baked beans from his nose. His tail moved in acknowledgment of her words, but he didn't make any other contribution to the conversation.
A few yards away, Cody was carefully checking the packs on all the animals, making sure that everything was snug. Sara watched him, envying his apparent calm. As far as she could see, he wasn't at all uneasy about attempting a climb that would have made Spiderman think twice. She glanced at the mountain and squared her jaw. If that was the way to get to Cullen, she'd get through it. Even if she had to do it on her hands and knees.
It seemed as if hardly any time at all had passed before their short lunch stop was over and Cody was saying that it was time to start again. He stood next to Satin, and Sara hoped her expression didn't mirror the terror she felt. Some of her feelings must have shown in her eyes, because his hand slid into the soft hair at the base of her neck, stopping her move to put her foot in the stirrup. Sara lifted her eyes to his reluctantly. She didn't want him to see the fear she was trying so hard to control.
"Let Satin choose the path. Keep your hands on the reins, though. She may need you to help her balance. I'll go up first and take the packhorses. If you see me get into any trouble, just stop and wait. Make sure you don't crowd the packhorses. The last thing we need is one of them getting nervous."
Sara nodded, swallowing the knot of fear that threatened to choke her. He'd pushed his hat back off his head, letting it hang down his back. His eyes gleamed emerald in the cloud-muted daylight. He studied her face for a long moment and then his hand slid deeper into her hair until she could feel the faint roughness of callused fingertips against her scalp.
"There's plenty of room on the trail. I've gone up places a lot worse and so have the horses. Just trust your horse and stay calm."
She nodded again, trying to look as if she believed him—trying to look as if her legs weren't trembling with sheer terror. She was not completely successful. Cody's mouth quirked in a tender smile and his other hand came up to stroke her soft cheek.
"Trust me. I wouldn't let you do it if I thought it was too dangerous." He looked into her eyes, which seemed to reflect the cloudy gray sky above them. "You trust me, don't you?" Sara nodded. She trusted him. It was the mountain she didn't trust.
"I wouldn't get you into anything I didn't know you could handle." His head dipped and her eyes closed, her mouth softening in invitation. The kiss was not the quick gesture of reassurance she had been expecting. His mouth slanted over hers as if he were famished for the taste of her. She lifted her hands to his face, as much for the pleasure of touching him as for balance.
His mouth plundered hers of every sweet secret. Tasting, demanding. Teasing a passionate response from her. All thoughts of the climb ahead of them spun out of her mind as she leaned into his body, letting him support her, losing herself in the swirling magic of his kiss.
She murmured an incoherent protest, her palms tightening on the stubble of his beard as he lifted his head. He smiled down into her dazed eyes.
"Concentrate on that instead." Her hands fell to her sides, leaving the only contact between them the explosive meeting of their eyes and his hands in her hair. "And think about tonight?"
"Tonight?" She couldn't drag her eyes from his.
"Tonight I'm going to make love to you until you taste me with every breath you take. Until my scent is imprinted on your skin." Sara's lashes brushed her cheeks as he bent to taste the sensitive skin beneath her ear. "I can't wait to feel your skin against mine." His breath skimmed across her ear. "Your legs wrapped around mine, your body tight around me."
"Cody." Sara hardly knew whether she was protesting his blunt words or begging him to take her there and then. She didn't think she was imagining the reluctance in his movements as he slowly drew away from her, leaving her standing on knees that showed a distinct tendency to wobble.
"Up you go." She accepted his boost into the saddle without a word. She wasn't sure she could have forced a word out, even if she'd known what to say. She couldn't drag her eyes away from his long-legged stride as he crossed the few yards to where Dancer stood. He swung up into the saddle, and she found herself noticing the way the soft denim molded his thighs, remembering the feel of those hard muscles under her hands.
They were well on their way up the narrow trail before she remembered to be frightened.
Unfortunately, once she remembered, the fright returned with a vengeance. The trail was so narrow that her right boot brushed against the cliff face and, at times, her left boot was hanging out over a sheer drop that seemed to increase logarithmically with every step the mare took. After one look downward, she jerked her eyes up and kept them fixed firmly on Cody's back. It was just as well that he'd told her to let the mare find her own way, because Sara didn't think she could have managed a single coherent action on her own. All she could do was cling to the reins and mutter one childhood prayer after another.
Telling herself that this was the only way to get to Cullen braced her mentally, but it didn't do anything for the sick knot that had lodged itself in the pit of her stomach. Was it possible to get car sick on the back of a horse? Well, she could hardly stop and take a Dramamine.
She risked another glance down and then wished she hadn't. She couldn't imagine the valley looking any farther away if she'd been looking at it from the moon. She dragged her eyes back to the solid bulk of Cody's back. She didn't even dare to look ahead to the end of the trail.
Ahead of her, one of the packhorses stumbled as a hoof came down too close to the rocky edge. Sara
's breath caught on a sob as she watched the animal scramble frantically. For a moment it looked as if the battle would be lost, and she waited to see the horse plunge to its death. She was hardly aware of her hands' tightening on the reins, pulling Satin to a halt, leaving plenty of room between them and the potential disaster a few feet away.
Cody turned in his saddle but he was helpless to do anything to aid the struggling animal. He'd tied the animals together in such a way that if one of them fell the knots would slip loose, preventing the others from being dragged over the side. But he'd raised this horse from a foal and he would feel its loss.
With a frightened snort, the horse lunged forward, scrabbling frantically for a moment until it managed to get all four feet under it. Cody's voice floated back to Sara as he spoke soothingly to the trembling animal. The incident had sent a ripple of terror through all four horses. She could feel Satin tensing beneath her and she leaned forward to whisper to the mare, stroking the taut neck with her free hand. The immediate danger had passed, but they stayed where they were for several long moments.
Suspended between heaven and earth, Sara had never been so aware of her own mortality as she was then. It could have been Satin who'd stumbled, and she might not have recovered. Sara closed her eyes, offering up a silent prayer of thanks.
She opened her eyes and looked over the mare's head, her eyes colliding with Cody's. At this distance she couldn't see the expression in his eyes, but the impact of his gaze was as powerful as ever. He seemed to stare at her intently for a long, silent moment before he lifted his hand, thumb up, in the universal signal of triumph. She returned the gesture, hoping he wouldn't be able to see that her hand was shaking.
The rest of the climb was uneventful, if she didn't count the fact that she never knew at what point Satin might slip and send the two of them hurtling over the side of the mountain. She watched Cody and Dancer, followed by the packhorses, disappear around a curve. When she rounded the curve, she saw that the last few feet of the trail were almost straight up. Helpless to do anything else, she closed her eyes, feeling Satin's muscles tighten as the mare gathered herself. The mare lunged suddenly upward and Sara's eyes flew open, expecting to see the two of them hurtling into space. But before Sara had a chance to do more than mutter a succinct prayer, Satin had scrambled up onto solid ground.
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