by A M Russell
'Just a little. Actually.... I was thinking how it works out when she has forgotten me completely....'
'You are going to do what she was trying to do?' Alex slammed the brakes on. The road was empty in both directions. We ended up skewed diagonally across the road. He turned to me. 'What do you think you are doing?' his eyes blazed at me, 'After all that big speech to Janey! All that thing about not playing God! What is the matter with you?'
'Stop it Alex. This isn't helping.'
'Not helping? I heard everything you said to her; all of it.'
'How? I had the door shut.'
'It's my house idiot! There's more than one way round anything in there. And I have a right to know! It's my life too. I won't let you.'
'Won't let me what? You think I'm like Janey?' I rubbed my hands over my face.
Alex turned the car back onto the left hand side of the road and pulled onto the side, and switched off the engine.
'This is it mate,' Alex said quietly, 'the reason why friends have to stick together. I know you want to save the world.... But from what exactly I can't quite make out.'
'It's "Sand Glass".' I mumbled.
'What the....?' Alex looked worried.
'Sand Glass. An operational name for what I understand to be a weapon of sorts. It doesn't work by destroying an enemy, but by finding the circumstances that bring about the desired result out of all possible outcomes.'
'Ah!' Alex stared out towards the sea.
'Sand Glass was a science experiment. Janey and Jules were two of the scientists at the University who conducted the first experiments. They did this thing called "Modulation" I believe. Jules says that it interrupts the causal flow, and allows other frequencies to burn through. Well that's how he put it. But what happened after that was really odd. They almost immediately got funding from a big sponsor for work on a larger scale. They already had smaller sponsors. Marcia Ellis being one of those; and She found herself drawn into this by a complicated set of unusual events. Janey left for summer recess and didn't come back because of the car accident she and her brother Jared were involved in. But by then the whole thing had moved onto the next stage. That was called "Nimbus" and it involved the Base we are now headed for. They set up the "Modulation” frequency round a small area and conducted experiments. People volunteered; some were military personnel. They were fine.. So it seemed. But then: well; things changed one day. The Modulator itself was in the space that was subject to the Modulator..... You following this?'
'Of course. Causality changes were now subject to the random, or apparently random ordering of the modulator itself.... Which in turn....' he looked at me, 'this is incredible! You've got yourself a time machine and dimension gate all in one'
'Err.... Yes. That's where the ice fields come in. Except for some people they are a desert; others a warm jungle mixed with fertile grassland.'
'And under water?' mused Alex.
'Possibly.'
'I get it.' he was pleased. His eyes flickered like he did when he was thinking really fast.
'Tell me?' I was cautious, as Alex didn't like to be interrupted when he was concentrating. At last he looked at me.
‘How well can you swim?’ he asked me.
We approached the base about an hour later. Alex’s and my argument had fizzled out. I suppose that we both knew that there was a higher calling at work. And basically, we both cared enough about our friendship not to let my bizarre romantic entanglement with Janey come between us. Notwithstanding anything even more strange; such as the iridescent creature who had appeared to me in my back garden. We had both seen more than normal rationality would generally find comfortable to digest. And as we did in fact share a common purpose… described by Alex as “not letting the bastards win”; we had enough to think about, without letting our personal distractions overwhelm us both.
I wish I’d been told at that moment that Jared had been right. Alex was only right up to the point at which the rules broke down. We all had something we wouldn’t let go of.
I wasn’t quite as confused then, as I am when tell you this, so I guess it was easy to say “pride”. But I know it wasn’t that. I was always a fantasist. I could only imagine that strange world writ large on tablets of my own consciousness. I had a hard time thinking of other people as actually doing something, somewhere else, that was equally important at the same time as me. So now I wonder what really happened that day.
Alex slammed the brakes on for the second time. It was just as we neared the turn off that would lead us to the Base.
‘What was that?’ He wound down the window.
‘I didn’t see anything.’
‘Okay….’ Alex seemed worried; ‘I thought I saw…. Actually someone. But there’s nothing there. Nothing.’ He looked at me.
‘We’re about three miles away. I want to tell you what might happen…’
‘Davey. Stop. Nothing will happen. I guarantee it. I can see where we are headed, and we won’t be meeting anything odd on the way at all.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Absolutely.’ He grinned at me, ‘When has Uncle Alex ever been wrong?’
‘Never. But there’s a first time for everything. I seriously hope that you know what you’re doing.’ We reached the turn off.
‘Well here goes.’ I said rather unnecessarily.
We bounced and giggled down the uneven track. Over the next rise and then down onto a slight dip. And then we saw some old concrete bunkers ahead, half covered by grasses and some brambles.
Alex pulled up at the end of the track. I was quite speechless. This was the place, no doubt about it. But there was nothing there. We got out.
‘Torch.’ said Alex, ‘let’s see if there is an entrance.’
We trod carefully round to the left, through high grass. It opened out a bit into a rocky outcropping and the bunkers were just below us in a short dip.
‘Look here!’ Alex was peering into some sort of entrance having got there before me.
I looked in and plainly saw for myself that it was a deserted shell in which a few bit of vegetation ventured where the sun could reach at different hours of the day.
‘What time is it?’
‘Nearly nine.’ I said, ‘Is that significant?’
‘Could be,’ said Alex, sweeping the small internal space with his torch, ‘there’s nothing here. Let’s go back to the Land rover and wait a bit.’
We walked by the short route we had come, and climbed back in.
‘I suppose we wait for the others then.’
‘I suppose we do.’ replied Alex, and peered up through the windscreen, ‘And it going to rain. Look in the back. There’s a flask and some pasties.’
‘What do you call it?’ I said.
‘I call it breakfast.’ Alex took the flask off me, ‘They are both the same. So just eat.’
A few spots of water landed on the glass in front of me, and then it built up to a torrential downpour in a few minutes.
‘Coastal weather. Should clear quite quickly, this one. I’ll take that thanks.’ Alex tightened the top and regarded me with sober tolerance.
‘Thanks for not saying “you’re mad”.’
‘You’re welcome.’ He slurped from the stacking thermos mug, ‘I can certainly think of better ways of spending my Saturday, but helping out my useless crazy friends has always….. Been top of my…..list.’ he put the cup down in astonishment. There outside, as clearly as anything was the side red brick wall of the labs, soaked in rain. We looked back and it was into mild sunshine. It was as if someone had ripped a hole in it all. I let Alex marvel at the impossible sight for a few more minutes.
‘That’s it! It’s rain!’
‘What is it?’
‘Don’t be thick! How does one hide something that is only there because of a distortion in the causal space between all things?’
‘Don’t know.’ I said, feeling impatience fall on me.
‘You’re supposed to be clever.’
‘I’m not a scientist.’
‘So what are you? Latrine Cleaner?’
‘No. everyone has to take turns.’
‘So I know something about science that you don’t. Ok… let me put it another way. You are going to a place that is in a way, not trying to hide, but by virtue of being deserted in this high place it would become untouchable.
‘Quantum Mechanics.’
‘Ah! The untutored mind; so fresh, so able to revel in the sense of screaming children at the event; and yet without such understanding. We are all the children. But rain makes us see. It washed the possibility out of the atmosphere. People don’t make choices in the same way when it’s raining. They ask someone to tell them what to do. “Shall I go and get the washing in?” “I’m not going out in that”; there it is. The perfect camouflage.’
‘But what about the people who work there? They must have shifts that come and go. Ten minutes early one day. Leaving a few minutes early another, I bet the moisture content of the air is always at a certain minimum measurement when that happens.’
‘Does that mean a person could get stranded there?’ I felt panicky.
‘Are you kidding? This is England. It’s October. What else do you want? Besides, I’ll be that at dew fall, it is easy to get in and out. And at any other time, as long as it’s wet in some way.’
‘Or snowing.’
‘Interesting. That you challenge me in this way. Now, I’ve got two difficult novels to read and a lot of chocolate in a hidden compartment.’
‘And you are telling me this, because?’
‘If you don’t make it back, you can die happy in the knowledge that my needs were met; upon this fateful day that is.’
‘It will take more than a day.’
‘Well meet me in the public hostelry. It’s three miles further along the main road from where we turned off. Really good bar meals.’
‘Agreed. Thanks..’
‘Just come back before all the chocolate is gone, and save me from myself.’
‘Bye Alex.’ I climbed out and rather stiffly I thought, and walked to the double entrance doors I could now see. I put my hand out. I turned and looked back towards Alex’s car. I could make it out in this damp aftermath of the downpour quite clearly. He seemed unconcerned.
A few minutes later I was in the common room. Security was so lax it was unreal. I could have signed in as Anne Boleyn and no one would have noticed.
‘Hello! Name?’
I spun round. ‘Name?’
‘Yes.’ said the girl with a red clipboard. She held a biro poised above it. ‘Do you speak English?’ she added clearly.
‘Yes. Of course I do… It’s Davey Milnes.’
‘Um. Yep. There you are!’ she smiled brightly, ‘some of the others came early. They’ve had their first briefing session. But you’ll been on at Eleven. Don’t worry. It’s all the boring stuff…’ she lowered her voice; ‘to be honest I don’t see why they bother, I mean we’ve all had so many visits anyway. As long as you know where the bar and the beds are, who cares!’
‘I don’t drink.’
‘Oh. Sorry. Is it Ramadan?’
‘No.’ I really wanted to see the list she was holding, ‘But I’ll certainly buy you a drink if you tell me where it is now.’
She put the clip board down and gave me directions. I glanced at it a few times as she chatted amiably. Got them all.
‘And what do they call you?’ I said.
‘Oh of course! Silly me. It’s Sarah. Sarah Silver… trainee medic. But I won’t be on this round, I’ll just be observing procedure. I’m not expedition trained yet; just new to base. At least I know where everything is.’
‘So Sarah..’ I said cautiously, ‘Where would I find you; if I needed directing to another part of Base?
She giggled in an irritatingly girly way. ‘I’m off the main corridor in the medic lounge. If you go out of that door and down the corridor, it’s on the left. You can’t miss it!’
‘Thanks.’ I sat down.
Seeing I wasn’t disposed to more conversation she left. What on earth was going on? I was on the list. And so was Janey, and Jared, and nearly all the others. I breathed slowly to calm myself. I remembered the day I had first met them all: a day like today. With a start of realisation, I recalled it was exactly like today; except for the irritating girl.
A few minutes later Oliver arrived he looked at me and sat down on a comfy chair. I was caught. Was this the Oliver I knew? Or was it the pre-expedition Oliver? We really hadn’t interacted until on that day with the igloo. I reckoned that I ought to wait a little. The room filled up. We were herded into the most boring session possible. Every face was closed off. The girl was there with her red clip board. I glanced at it, until she turned to talk to someone on her left and I got clearer view. They were all accounted for. The only one that wasn’t on the list was Jules. But that was true last time as well. He’d been added at the last minute.
After twenty minutes of this; which was the basic intro by one of the lesser minions, we then were taken to the canteen. A lovely buffet was laid on. I got a cup of tea and meandered systematically round the room looking to catch the eye of someone I knew.
I found myself standing near Jared. It made me feel sad. It was like a kind of special torture. What way would it happen this time? Or had the whole thing taken on a life of its own? I was soon to find out.
‘And now! Your attention please! Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to our newly appointed Base Director Mr Rimmington!’ some muted applause followed as most people were trying to juggle tea cups and plates of food. I wasn’t hungry. Beside I thought that there could be something in it. I wasn’t however prepared for the shock that awaited me in the next few minutes. The group unconsciously shunted forward in an effort to see the esteemed director. And I had trouble seeing past all the bodies. It was that Alexander person. He was like Jules, but so obviously not Jules. The resemblance seemed now quite superficial. The Mr Alexander ID must be an affectation he had adopted when out in the field. The holes left in people’s memories meant he could fill it with whatever he liked. I worked my way back to Jared. He stood at the back separate from the rest. I tried to catch his eye. He saw me staring, and with one finger beckoned me to him. I stood next to him, waiting for him to speak.
‘Red settee. Five Minutes.’ He said without shifting his position or looking at me.
I found him in the old familiar pre-expedition lounge. The one with the plushest upholstery.
‘Come. Sit.’
‘Jared… I…’
‘Just sit down.’
I did so and he joined me; ‘we are not watched in here. The surveillance has been deactivated. Tell me one thing. Which round are you from?’
‘Round?’
‘How many times have you been here, do you think?’
‘I just came in from outside. But I left over a week ago, and went home. I came back today.’
‘Do you know me?’ he turned sharply, as the door sprang shut into the frame. ‘I must try not to be so jumpy.’ He added.
‘Dear Lord! Jared…. I know you very well indeed. I can’t believe you’re here! I can ever begin to explain what I know…. But I am here to find out how to stop him!’ I pointed back the way I came in.
‘You are David Jonathan Milnes. And you are from a place in the city…. “Sky” something…’
‘Blue Sky Designs.’
‘I see.’ He was thinking, fidgeting with his hands in that distracted way. He took a notebook and pen out of the casual jacket; ‘Did you have any trouble getting here today?’
‘Not really. Just waited twenty minutes or so in my friend’s car until it stopped raining.
‘Raining?’
‘Yes….’
‘It was raining. Oh dear God!’ he bent forward.
‘Jared, are you alright?’
‘Yes. I’m fine.’ He sat up, ‘but I’m guessing by the way you keep looking at me that
you are going to tell me that I’m another corpse or something.’
‘Yes,’ I swallowed, ‘Exactly that….’
‘Tell me.’
‘I can’t. You are complicated. I need to get to the cloud field. I need to go to the place where the magnetic fields go crazy. Where you cannot find your direction anymore. I need to get out of here. Because I sure as anything won’t pass the evaluation test. I don’t think I can fake not knowing in the reaction test.’
‘It’s not memory it’s testing. But I do see your point.’ Jared looked thoughtful, ‘Did anyone else on the outside have any involvement in this?’
‘Yes… including your sister.’
‘My sister?’ Jared looked confused, then looked away, ‘I don’t remember my sister.’
‘You know her. But you don’t know that you two are connected in that way.’
We both flinched then when the lounge door banged open, and a very flustered Janey tramped in.
‘This is preposterous! Where is the kit for the other experiments? I want them sorting by tomorrow at the latest!’ the two technicians scuttled away to fulfil her orders.
‘Oh! Hi there Milnes!’ she winked at me.
‘Janey…’ I looked from her to Jared and back again.
‘That’s a trifle over familiar Mr Milnes! I’ll thank you to keep it a little formal until we know each other.’
‘Janey! Stop it! Your overacting will get us both into trouble.’
‘Yes. Sorry. But it was good though! I’ve never seen them move so fast!’
‘Yes, very good but what about…?’
‘What?’ she folded her arms, I realised she was getting annoyed.
I looked helplessly at Jared. He just stood calmly waiting for the penny to drop down inside my head.
‘Are you going to have any food?’
‘I guess so.’
She came close to me. And whispered in my ear, ‘I’m really scared Davey. I’m really shit scared. But I’m going on that transport tomorrow even if it kills me.’
