by A M Russell
‘Go. My friends. Fly!’ and with a last effort he pulled the monster back towards the falling rocks.
Oliver and I scooped up Jared. And the two girls pulled us forwards. We ran as the mountain crumb led around us. I wrapped my arm round Jared, and half pulled, half carried him, as his face contorted with pain.
‘Now!’ Marcia shouted with all her might. They all linked arms with us two as we ran towards the edge. Somewhere behind us there was a horrible noise of hissing and bellowing.
We saw the light rise and heard the roar of the water, and as all the ground broke under us as we leapt into the bright air and the light. At that moment Jared cried out, as the silver knife pieced his back, thrown by the evil Rimmington. And Elland… in a last incredible moment of strength had deflected the monster’s aim and stabbed it through the heart with his own knife.
We fell through air and light and the foam, and convulsions of white horses came up to meet us. In a flash of heavenly blue and gold the sun shot through the twisting raging glassy beauty of the wild water. I breathed in. And then we plunged in. Down and down sinking like a stone. Jared was spinning round me. And sinking. I felt for the clasp of his pack and unclipped it. I could see much but we were falling sucked down and down. I free him from the pack and it dropped out of sight through the darkness. Then released my pack letting it fall away. I still had the hunting knife. I slit the laces of our heavy boots and pulled them off. And then we seemed to be going upwards. Jared’s eyes were closed. But he seemed to be holding his breath. I saw Oliver drop his pack and swim with powerful strokes towards the paler mottled bands of light above. Then I saw light and bubbles streaming upwards. I didn’t let go of Jared and kicked for the surface. I could not see the other two.
Then I felt a tug. I could hear nothing but my own heartbeat hammering in my ears. We were still swimming. Light above. Swishy and indistinct. We swam upwards, a stream of bubbles tracing our path. Suddenly It felt as if the earth convulsed deeper beneath. Or like a charge had exploded in the water under us and we shot to the surface.
I was breathing automatically again. And swimming. We were all there. I blinked and coughed. I could see the sky above me. I was instinctively treading water. I finally cleared my eyes. I could see a line of colours that I recognised as the sandy banding of coastal shore line under a cloudy sky. Janey was to my right. And Marcia and Oliver were behind me. Between them they supported Jared in the water. A thin trail of blood leaked from his upper body. It was a long way to shore. I turned around in the water. We had to make it to the beach.
‘Davey!’ someone calling me. I turned to see the body of a small boat bobbing about thirty feet away.
The slosh and slap of water on the hull was accompanied by the cries of gulls. The water felt cold. The boat came alongside us.
Two pairs of arms reached down and hauled me in. I slid across the deck. The next was Marcia. She turned to help lift Jared out. Oliver and Janey were pulled in last.
Jared laid in the bottom of the boat. Joe and Violette were there ripping the clothing apart. I felt the world turn over and the sky seemed to darken. Adam got hold of me, and stuck my head over the side just in time.
I was violently sick. He just kept me there until it passed. The boat was moving. I turned. Jared was pinned down by Violette and Joe and Oliver. He was gabbling something completely incoherent. His blood stained the decking. He was struggling against those who were trying to help him. His eyes glazed and fixed, as if he was still in that other place, feeling the touch of that dark fire out of some hell of Rimmington’s personal residence. Adam took the helm as we steered to shore. And there was Alex. He bent over Jared.
‘Listen…. Listen to me. This is England. I’m Alex. And this is my boat!’ He took Jared’s hand. He went limp and his eyes turned to the Man bent over him.
‘I’m Davey’s friend…. Do you hear. I came to save you all; to fish you out of the drink, my friend. And you must be worth a lot for my best mate to go off on this wild goose chase for all this time! Look at me. We’ve got people waiting on shore. We’ll patch you up…. Steady now….’
Jared calmed then. He focused on Alex, and said in a voice I never thought I’d hear in this world ‘Thanks boatman….’
‘It is Alex. And I’m a nice guy. Nice enough to watch Davey’s back and come out here when I should legitimately be down the pub!’
‘Hello Alex…’ Jared said and then his face changed and screwed up in the sharp pain as the salt water must have stung the wounds. Violette tutted and tried to make him keep still. Janey bent over him and stroked his face. They rolled him onto his side to take a good look. I saw him looking upwards; and his hands relaxed. I think Violette must have given him something for the pain then, because a few minutes later he was relaxed against Janey’s shoulder as Joe and Violette stopped the bleeding. I turned away exhausted. I started to feel cold.
I looked up. I heard the cry of the seagulls. And the chill salty air filled my mind and I was staring upwards as we neared the landing place.
‘Davey?’ Janey came and sat next to me. Violette and Joe had Jared bound on a stretcher ready for the others waiting at the shore to receive us.
I turned to Janey again. She was looking at me. And now…. She was real. Dragged out of the waves by the inestimable Alex, as if she was some strange mermaid. I looked across at Marcia and Oliver. Chatting and making a joke. Marcia caught my eye, and smiled.
‘Alright there Milnes?’ said Oliver
‘Yeah. I think I am.’ I looked towards the beach with a hungry look.
As we slid into the shingle; I fell on my knees on that sandy shore and blessed the very stones. I said a quick prayer of thanks for deliverance. I had enough of adventures for now.
I took Janey’s hand, as we waited in the nearby hospital waiting room. She looked at me but seemed distracted. They called us then. Jared was sat up smiling as we all trouped in. I must say looking a lot cleaner that the rest of us. And he whispered something to me that I didn’t understand, until we were sat drinking tea in a local hotel.
‘What did Jared tell you?’ Janey asked me.
‘He said…. I think he said…’
‘What?’ she shook her head puzzled.
‘He said to not forget who I really am.’
‘He was always telling me the same thing.’ Janey replied.
‘I think he’s afraid if what might happen. We nearly lost him there.’
‘In more ways than one.’ I said.
‘Yes,’ she looked down. And seemed sad.
‘Are you alright?’ I asked.
‘Tired.’ She looked up and seemed to unfocus and her eyes wandered intlothe distance, ‘I wonder if she made it back?’
‘Your other self?’
‘Yes. In her reality. In her world, he’s still sleeping. Still in a coma.’
‘Yes.’
‘Did you see it?’
‘No.’
‘Why did you help us?’
I looked away. And I saw that pretty mouth and wished that I might brush her lips against mine. I didn’t say anything though. But she sat with me then, and we watched the sun leave the sky. Marcia came back and seemed pleased with things. She said down next to me as well.
‘It was the right thing to do.’ I said suddenly.
‘You are just like him.’ said Janey.
‘Why?’
‘Answering questions an hour later.’
‘Oh.’ I said and looked at Marcia. She just patted me on the shoulder and got up and ordered more tea.
‘What day is it today?’ I said suddenly.
Marcia was back looking pleased. ‘Oh! The fifth.’
‘Of what?’
‘November.’
‘Does that mean fireworks?’ I asked her.
‘We’ll find out soon enough. One step at a time.’ Marcia seemed puzzled.
‘You’re not still worried about that missing knife are you?’
‘No. Just curious.’ I said.
‘Do
you two want anything from the bar?’ Marcia stood over us.
‘Whatever you’re having…. Unless it’s really horrible beer. And not white wine. Whiskey would be nice…’
‘Davey?’ Janey put her hand over my mouth.
‘Mmm?’
‘Shut up now.’
*****
Fifteen
I crawled up out of the water of a dark dream. In the shadows and lights of re-reflected light, I half sleep walked to the bathroom.
The sudden brightness, painful; cold light that was stark and surreal. I bent over the sink, running some water into the bowl as I did so. There in the silence, punctuated by the drip drip from the tap, I was grappling with the internal welling of images, and my half formed conclusions about my recent experiences. I glanced in the mirror. I was still there; still me.
I went downstairs to the kitchen, to a warmer glow of light. I made hot chocolate and plonked myself down in a chair and switched on the lounge lamp. It served no purpose but to make me doubt my sanity yet again. Every time I had tried to sleep in the last three days, I had woken from dreams in a rush at about 2am. I was shattered, but could not rest properly. I pulled the phone towards me. I wondered if I should ring the number Violette had given me….she had given it to all of us. The debrief would be in a few days, at George’s house (the big place with the cellar). Who was I calling? It was a special number… you could always call and get one of the people assigned to protect our minds right there, to take down all the crazy things that we would say. I thought they were letting us shed our snakeskin into their hands. We were slowly being stripped of all the useful data. I wasn’t stupid enough not to recognise a ploy like that when I saw it. Yet….when the foul stench of your subconscious is something you want to run from where else could we go? Any ordinary doctor would think us to be having some sort of break with reality. And they’d be right. But the reality we had forsaken, and the dream we had searched and travelled through were both real.
I curled up in the chair, exhausted…. But knowing that the moment it started again I would jolt awake.
My state of mind at that point was one that I look back on with a sense of shame or fear. I wasn’t used to not having at least some control.
I rang the number.
‘Davey? This is Sam. I’m not far from you. Would you like me to come round right now?’
‘You do that?’
‘Yes. It can be helpful,’ he paused as if picking something up, ‘You are ten minutes from me right now.’
‘What are you doing in the area?’
‘Assignment of a dubious nature. I guess I wanted the job because it sounded interesting. What would you like me to do?’
‘You really are in the area?’
‘Yes. Five minutes away now. Could be an error.’
‘You’re using sat nav?’
‘Yes.’
‘Only come round if you agree to switch it off right now!’
‘Okay. It’s off.’
‘Just like that?’
‘Definitely. You are far more important than the other thing.’
‘Other thing?’
‘I’m not supposed to tell you…’
‘Are you laughing at me Sam?’
‘No. I just want to tell you something to make you feel better.’
‘Are you nearly here?’
‘Just arrived.’
Outside, I heard the sound of a car pulling up. I dived for my keys and went to let Sam in.
‘Tea and crumpets? I am honoured.’
‘Only if you eat then right now. Otherwise they’ll end up down my gullet!’
‘Davey? Is there anything I can help with that is about something other than an all-nighter emptying the contents of your fridge?’
‘I don’t keep them in the fridge.’
He held up a hand. ‘No need to be so literal, the point is made.’ He held up a fag packet, ‘Do you mind if I smoke?’
‘Yes… actually I do. It makes me gag. Actually anything makes me gag at the moment.’
‘I does?’ Sam rolled a unlit cigarette between his fingers, ‘I wondered…. When did you last eat?’
‘We’re having crumpets.’
‘I meant you eating, there you are.’
'Oh!' I sipped from the cup in front of me, 'that was yesterday.'
'Are you sure?'
'What is this?' I shifted in my seat.
'It's okay....' Sam reached out an stopped me, by putting his hand on my wrist. I sat back again.
'If you mean properly.... Then not since I've been back...' I looked at him directly then expecting a scolding.
'Thanks David, for being honest with me,' he tapped the cigarette on the little coffee table, and slid it back into the packet, 'I have to tell you, that you're not the only one.'
'I'm not?' all my thoughts ran towards Janey, and then back to Sam sitting there regarding me so solemnly.
'I could open the back door. And you could stand outside it?'
'What?' Sam had obviously been running through something in his mind. He got up out of the chair, I followed him.
Sam leaned round the door jamb and blew a stream of smoke out into the cold night air. The smiled with satisfaction.
'Better?' I asked.
'You bet. This is not a good time to give up. But I wish I could.' -then seeing the look I gave him, 'Everyone's obvious weakness is the one people always remember you for.'
'What?' I set about putting the kettle on. Seemed kind of safe.
Sam came and stood next to me, 'I've locked it.'
'What do I do Sam? I can't sleep properly.... Everything tastes funny. It's like I'm still there. I mean back in the experiment.'
'Go on...' Sam took over tea making, and I perched on a kitchen chair.
'I have these terrible dreams.... Well more like nightmares really. And I just wake up.'
Sam lined up cups and pot on a tray, and indicated for me to keep talking.
'When I wake up it's like I'm in the Summerland. And I feel happy for a moment. Then I'm alone...' I trailed off.
'Come on. Back to the comfy chair.' Sam waited until I Held a cup in my hands then sat down himself.
'I just want something normal back again. I mean I know it takes time....'
'It's only been three days.'
'How are the rest of the gang?'
'We're talking about you, not them.'
'It would help.'
'Well,' Sam sat back, considering his words carefully, 'I'm glad to say that most of them are doing better than you.'
'And who's not doing better?'
'Nicholas and Jules are about the same as you. Nik is at his parents now and he's getting back to normal.'
'And Jules?'
'He can't be left alone. He's staying with Violette.'
'Lucky guy!'
'In her spare room. I went round there yesterday. He's rambling a lot. After going back in Base that day he seemed to make a jump backwards. I think that Violette will put him right now. She is the only person who doesn't get rattled by him.'
I thought about what happened that night at camp, and nodded slowly.
'The rest of the original crew seem mostly alright. A few blips but generally fine.'
'What about Hanson?' I said suddenly.
'You know, It's funny you should ask that. But he seems to have suffered no ill effects whatsoever. He's back at work. He's apparently a void case.'
'A whatty?'
'No recall of the trip.'
'You don't believe that do you?'
'Of course not! We're keeping an eye on things.'
'And that is....?'
'Dr Rhodes, George, Kyle, Dieter, and Jean.'
'Hanson's PA?'
'He'd like you to think that, but no.... She works for us.'
'Us? Who is that?'
Sam leaned closer to me, and whispered even though there was no need for it, 'We are "Sandglass". We were never disbanded....just officially removed from Project Ban
k; Nimbus is out for our souls. I'm the clever sod who helped keep Sandglass true.... Kept the members loyal.'
'I assume that you mean Marcia and some of the original sponsors?'
'Yes. And no. Only Marcia was ever part of this in an intimate sense. The other sponsors exist outside the actual experiment. Marcia was very specific on which project she was willing to support, that is what got the directors attention. Others made a general donation that was spread out over more than one project. But Marcia did one thing that the others couldn't do.'
'Okay! Dramatic pause, do tell!'
'I was simply thinking how to put this. Marcia could not only pass all the tests; she demonstrated an incredible ability to not be affected by paradox.'
'It's that really bizarre test right? The odd one where you don't guess the result that they show you, but guess the other result that would have happened?'
'Yeah. That one.'
'They never tell you the score, just if you passed or not.'
'Now you're getting it.' Sam fidgeted with the cig packet, 'Out of the ones that scored really high on the hit rate; there were two that really stood out. Marcia was one.'
'And Janey?'
'She didn't take the tests. She had not got to Base.' Sam put the packet down on the coffee table, 'You are the only other one who scored One Hundred Per cent every time.'
'What does that mean?'
'It means that you are a commodity that Project Bank would try to exploit. The Sandglass People want to stop this happening.'
'They still have me in their sights?' I shifted in my seat.
'Again Yes and No. Dr Rhodes covered for you and Marcia; but they suspect that some of the test results had been changed....'
'She lied?' I thought of Hanson's accusation.
'She delayed the test marks; and dropped out some other information.'
'She didn't change the results?'
'No. She just left identifiers out.'
'What?'
'The codes that tell them whose set of data it is.'
'I thought it was anonymous.'
'It is supposed to be.'
'So psyche girl was doing what she was meant to do, and not supplying personal info; even though the committee had ordered it to be sent on to them.'
