Angered by the thought Kaori let her free hand come to rest on the handle, surprised to feel it open easily under the pressure of her touch. Before she could change her mind about entering she took a step into the room, chin held high, fingers clenched tightly around the hilt of her sword, prepared to fight if anyone inside the chamber proved hostile. Instead, she found it silent. Devoid of life, much the same as everywhere else in the city. There was less blood here than she’d seen anywhere. Everything appeared in perfect order, situated in exactly the same fashion as she remembered from her first visit. The only thing that looked out of place was a single body lying in the center of the room. It was without doubt a man, his dark uniform impossible not to see against the brilliant white of the marble floor. A shock of short, ebon hair covered the face from view though she didn’t need to see his eyes to know who he was.
“Oh, gods, Therek!” she cried out, instantly releasing the sword from her hand as she rushed forward to fall on the ground at Therek’s side. Grasping him by the shoulders she rolled him onto his back, crying out at the sight of blood covering the thick fabric of the doublet he wore, ripped over the chest where a long, slender, silver blade still protruded outward. His face was pale. Ashen. Blood marred the floor where he had been lying, soaked into the fine lines between each tile. Desperate for some indication of life, she ran her fingertips along Therek’s neck, searching wildly for a pulse, tears burning in her eyes at the stillness she felt from his veins. “Please, no…”
Gently she held his head in her left hand, sitting back to rest his body in her lap, cradling him in her arms. He couldn’t be dead. She refused to believe it. Yet here he was. The radiant azure glow from his eyes had dimmed, leaving them dull and grey, lifelessly gazing up at the ceiling, unfocused. Kaori’s tears streamed down her face, an agonized wail resounding through the room as she gave up holding back the anguish that overwhelmed her. Therek was dead. After everything he had done to help her, sacrificed his title, his land, his freedom – and she left him here to die alone. What was worse, she never had a chance to tell him thank you. To tell him… that she loved him. It hit her harder than any physical blow to realize her mistake. She’d been so caught up in everything; her own grief and pain. How could she have been so selfish? Even if he didn’t feel the same, he deserved to know the truth. But it was too late. He died thinking her a heartless, undeserving wretch, who had done nothing since the day they met other than insult and degrade him. What few instances they had together where she allowed herself to be vulnerable in his presence weren’t enough to make up for all the terrible things she said to him. All the things she’d done!
Pulling him tighter to her chest she sobbed into the bloody fabric of his uniform, her pain intensifying to feel his limp arms fall away from her embrace. He was so cold… “I’m so sorry, Therek,” she breathed into his shoulder, tears soaking the material to mingle with the blood. The weight of Therek’s body was starting to feel lighter. Lifting from her legs as if pulled away by some invisible hand. Opening her eyes, she clung to him tighter, unwilling to let him go. Everything around her was beginning to fade. The vibrant colors of the furniture blurring, her mind no longer able to retain the detail with the same clarity from before. As the world began to wink out of existence around her, she continued her desperate plea, whispering into the darkness until it was the only thing which remained in her consciousness. “Please, don’t leave me, Therek. I don’t want you to go. Please, forgive me. Please…”
“Hush, Kaori. I am right here,” Therek’s voice cut through Kaori’s distorted thoughts, a soft pressure against her arms helping to draw her further from the nightmare in which she’d found herself trapped. Another voice could be heard, repeatedly calling Therek’s name, begging him to stay. Was that her? Was she speaking out loud?
After several moments she became cognizant of her lips moving in perfect time with the words being spoken. For some reason she couldn’t make herself stop. “Don’t go,” she pleaded. Pitiful. Desperate. “I’m so sorry. Forgive me.” Tears rolled down her cheeks, their salty warmth dripping from her skin onto the soft fabric of Therek’s shirt. She could feel it soaking into the threads, aware of the humiliation she should feel at having broken down in front of him but she couldn’t bring herself to care. He was alive! It was all a dream. Therek was here.
Overcome with joy and relief she let her arms wrap around Therek, pulling him closer to her in a fervent embrace. She didn’t care if it was improper to behave in such a fashion. Her emotions were running rampant. Therek would have to accept her strange behavior until she managed to regain her senses and explain the reasoning for her actions.
He made no move to push her away. His embrace was equally warm, squeezing her gently as if afraid he would hurt her if he applied too much pressure, while unable to stop himself from holding her firmly in his grasp. “I am here, Kaori. Sweet Sarid, you are awake. I didn’t think I would hear your voice again.”
Awake. Yes, she had been asleep. It was nothing more than a terrible nightmare. Desperate to prove the truth to herself, Kaori pulled against Therek’s arms, staring down at her clothing to make sure she was no longer wearing the unusual uniform from her dream. She was back in the tattered fabric of her dress, the shreds covered in dirt and blood, barely concealing her body from view. Somehow she couldn’t bring herself to feel embarrassment at her appearance. What did it matter if Therek saw a little more of her skin? All she cared about was that he was alive. Her friends were alive. There was still a chance she could save them from the horrible fate which had befallen them in her dream.
Their embrace broken, Therek took the opportunity to check her over for injuries, his hand reaching out to rest against her forehead, searching for signs of the fever she’d suffered before lapsing into her deep sleep. A long exhale escaped his lips as they curled into a smile, the azure glow of his eyes sparkling back at her with content. “Your fever has broken. It is a miracle, Kaori. The gods truly do watch over you.”
“It is no miracle,” she shook her head, fighting back the urge to wrap her arms around Therek once again. While her embrace had been accepted before, she couldn’t be sure such a gesture would be greeted with the same joy if she were to attempt it again. This was Therek, after all. He wasn’t exactly known to be the most sociable of men.
Therek blinked in vehement disapproval of Kaori’s dismissiveness, quickly leaning forward to guide her down onto the mattress, his fingers tugging at the blankets to arrange them gently over her shoulders. “It can be described as nothing else,” he argued, lightly brushing a strand of sweat-covered hair from Kaori’s face. “You have been comatose for days. Pehrona advised of the unlikeliness you would ever open your eyes again.”
Kaori’s lips parted to speak in disagreement, finding the argument lost on her tongue before the words could form. Images floated through her mind from the final moments of consciousness she could recall. Her condition had been poor. Weakened by the infection which spread throughout her body. In those fleeting memories she remembered wishing for death to take her away and end her torment. Anything was better than the pain. But had it really been that long? Had she truly been asleep for days? At the realization, she let her eyes stray from Therek’s face, taking in the details of the room around her. It was different than she remembered. The furniture well-crafted, exquisite in design. Far better quality than that which adorned the inner cabins of the ship. Above all else, the incessant rocking motion had ceased, leaving the room perfectly still, devoid of the sound of crashing waves and the shouts of the Captain calling out orders to the crew.
“Are we… did we make it to… Namorea?”
The smile on Therek’s face brightened somewhat, his hand returning to Kaori’s forehead as if afraid his initial check had been inaccurate and that he would find her temperature raised. “We reached the mainland two days ago. Ambassador Valdur has been kind enough to take us in. If you are feeling up to it, perhaps in a few days you might be able to venture outside
and see the beauty of the country for yourself.”
It was a lot to take in. Nothing felt as if it was in her control. The past several weeks of her life had passed with so much confusion and pain. She didn’t know what she was doing anymore. One minute she had everything all figured out; the next she was captive in the deepest, darkest cell of the Imperial Prison. Rescued by the wife of the very man who wanted her dead only to then find herself traversing the unforgiving heat and sand of the desert, nearly dying in Gavir where she was loaded onto a ship to take her across the Nahpoa Sea. And now… she was in a foreign country, lying in the bed of a man who belonged to a race she knew nothing about. Somewhere along the way she lost sight of her goals and became focused on nothing but survival. Now that she had succeeded in holding onto life, she no longer knew what to do.
Mhina had spoken of Therek arranging some form of alliance with the Namirens. If that was the case, it seemed there was little for her to do. Therek was the one who would need to conduct business where politics were concerned. He was the tactician. The rightful Emperor. She was nothing next to him, possessing no authority to do anything other than offer advice. And she wasn’t entirely sure she had much advice to give. “What are we going to do?” she asked quietly, giving in to Therek’s gentle urging to relax into the soft, welcoming warmth of the blankets. It felt good to lie there. Despite the length of time Therek claimed her to have been asleep, she was exhausted. Yearning to close her eyes while at the same time afraid that doing so would return her to the horrible nightmares which plagued her subconscious.
“You are going to rest,” he replied simply, leaning back to sit up straight, the smile fading from his lips at the question. With his joy dissipated, he once again reminded Kaori of the Therek she had grown so used to seeing. Somber. Serious. “Now that you are awake, I must inform Ambassador Valdur so arrangements can be made for an audience with the Namiren King. From what I hear, he is very interested in meeting you.”
“The Ambassador?” Kaori stared at Therek in disbelief, unsure of why the Ambassador would have reason to care anything about her. She was no one special. Given her past when it came to speaking with diplomats, she didn’t think it wise to let her anywhere near the Namirens. With her luck, she risked angering them and losing their support.
Unfazed by the confusion in Kaori’s expression, Therek shook his head, glancing toward the door before saying anything in response. “I referred to the King,” he stated plainly, shifting his eyes to examine Kaori’s appearance with a scrutinizing gaze, searching for something which might indicate that her illness had returned. “The audience with him is intended for you both to discuss details of our alliance.”
“Me?” Kaori gasped. “Therek, I do not think that is wise…”
“There is no one else, Kaori. I cannot handle all the details of war myself.”
“But you are the rightful heir to the Carpaen throne. If the King is open to an alliance, it seems as though it would be a slight for you to send someone of no title or rank to conduct official business with him.”
“You forget that none of us hold rank or title anymore. We are all nobodies. I cause no slight in sending you to discuss strategies.”
“No official rank, perhaps, but you cannot deny the implications of the will left by the previous Emperor. You may not wear the crown, but you are still the intended ruler of Carpaen, and therefore you should be the one to meet with the Namiren King.”
Lips pursed, Therek drew in a long, contemplative breath, staring at Kaori with mild frustration at her continued arguments. She hated to see him look at her in that way. It wasn’t her intention to anger him. He couldn’t deny that what she spoke was the truth. “A great deal will change if we win this battle, Kaori,” he started. Quiet. Thinking carefully over his words before speaking them out loud. “I need you to forget about that piece of paper you speak of so frequently as if it somehow means anything. Everyone knows you are the spirit behind our people. The one who has given every Vor’shai in Carpaen hope. Your name is on the lips of every man and woman whose lives have been affected by Sulel’s tyranny, therefore you are the one the Namiren King desires to speak with. He requested you personally.”
Kaori’s head was spinning. She wasn’t well enough to handle this. It was too much. Too soon. “I am not… you cannot expect me to do this. I know nothing of battle strategy. The King will think me a simpleton. Please tell me that you will at least accompany me to the meeting.”
“It is not possible,” he frowned.
“Not possible?” Kaori’s heart started to race. Why was he being so difficult? She was sick! He couldn’t expect her to do anything when at the moment she wasn’t even capable of standing on her own. “Why is it not possible? What do you have to do that is so important you must leave me to humiliate our people in front of the Namiren King?”
“You will not humiliate anyone, Kaori.” Concern creased Therek’s forehead as he leaned forward, resting the palm of his hand against her cheek. “I would accompany you if I could, but I must return to Carpaen. I have already set us behind schedule by insisting that I remain here with you. Now, please,” he lowered his voice, calm and soothing in attempts to help her relax. “I need you to rest. Try not to worry. You are only going to make yourself sick again.”
A sharp pain tore through Kaori’s chest at the mention of Therek leaving. It didn’t seem safe for him to return to Carpaen. After her escape from the prison, Sulel most likely assumed Therek had something to do with it. He would have every soldier in the country on watch, prepared to arrest him the moment he was found. “You cannot go back there,” she whispered, a grimace contorting her features as she tried not to let herself give in to the overwhelming urge to cry. You are being ridiculous; she chided herself. She wasn’t the type of woman who let her emotions rule her so completely. Nightmares aside, there was no reason to break down in front of Therek again. She couldn’t have him thinking her weak.
“We cannot build an army if I do not return,” Therek sighed, dejected by the sight of Kaori’s eyes gazing up at him with such misery. Her eyes were the only tool she had to use against him. Holding his stare, she refused to look away, hopeful that he might possess a shred of compassion and be swayed to change his mind, for her sake. “Ambassador Valdur has granted me permission to use his ship. I will travel to Carpaen with several of his men in my company to provide added protection and assistance in recruiting anyone who is willing to join us in our fight.”
“Sulel will have his men searching for you. Could you not send someone else?”
“Who could I send?” Therek asked, exasperated. “We are all wanted men, Kaori. Anyone associated with you was labeled a traitor and a price placed on our heads the moment you were implicated in the rebellion. I cannot in good conscience send anyone else when I know the risks involved. This is something I must do myself.”
Defeated, Kaori turned her head away, staring up at the ceiling to avoid seeing the determination in Therek’s eyes. He was so inexorable! Yet she knew he was right. It was a risk no matter who returned. Sulel practically made it a crime to be Vor’shai. She just didn’t like the idea of Therek putting himself in that position. Enough people had died already. It tore at her heart to consider the possibility of her nightmares coming true. What if Therek never returned from Carpaen? What if she arrived with the Namiren soldiers only to find him dead under Sulel’s hand the way she’d seen in her dreams?
At her silence, Therek retracted his hand from Kaori’s face. She felt the mattress shift under his weight as he rose to his feet, pausing to stare down at her a moment longer before turning toward the door. Terrified at the thought of him leaving Kaori rolled onto her side, her arm reaching out to try and grab him before he moved too far away, the tips of her fingers barely brushing the fabric of his sleeve, unable to grab hold. “Therek.” She hated how pathetic she sounded. Miserable. Desperate.
Instantly, Therek stopped, turning to face her in a slow, controlled movement. “Yes?”
She didn’t know what she intended to say. All she knew was that she didn’t want him to go. Beyond stopping him, she hadn’t thought the rest of her plan through. “Do you intend to leave this moment?”
“The sooner we are on the water, the better.”
“But it…” she glanced toward the window at the far side of the room, taking note of the darkness outside. “It is late. Would it not be easier to set sail with the sun?”
“I have already taken too much time, Kaori. We were supposed to depart yesterday.”
“Please,” Kaori pleaded, sitting up on the bed to hold her hand out to Therek, no longer caring how wretched she looked. All that mattered was getting him to stay. Even if only for a few more minutes. “I fear the nightmares which may come if I am left alone. Stay with me until I fall asleep. Your company would greatly ease my mind.”
Therek looked torn. Uncertain. His gaze shifted toward the door, closing his eyes while seeming to fight some internal struggle. When they finally opened again he turned his gaze upon Kaori, the lines on his face easing, a half-smile curling at the edges of his mouth. “I suppose I could stay a little longer,” he nodded, moving to situate himself in a chair positioned near the entrance. Before he could lower onto the cushion Kaori stretched her arm toward him again, waving him to stop. She knew it was inappropriate to make the request she intended to speak, but for some reason she couldn’t bring herself to care.
“Please, sit with me.”
She could practically feel the hesitation exuding from Therek at her invitation. What was she thinking? Her pulse quickened to consider the possibility of him doing as she asked. It was scandalous. Beyond improper for a lady to ask a man into her bed, regardless of whether her intentions were pure. She didn’t plan to do anything. All she wanted was to feel him there. To know he was by her side when she drifted off to sleep. It brought her comfort just to think of it. A few minutes wouldn’t do any harm.
The Myatheira Chronicles: Volume Four: In the Beginning Page 66
