“I don’t mind.” Levi couldn’t believe those words actually escaped his lips. He didn’t want her questions. He certainly didn’t want her to whisper them in his ear.
The memory of her closeness, the way he could smell her freshness, the sensation of her warm breath against his skin was enough to send heat rushing through his body once more. “I must to get to work.”
“I understand. I’ll stop talking. You can pretend I’m not even here.”
He’d already learned that wasn’t possible. He would forbid his sister to leave in the future.
“When Grace decides to marry, you’ll have to hire a replacement for her. Someone with a sunny disposition would be nice. Can you think of anyone who might interest you? As a replacement for Grace, I mean.”
“Nee.” He didn’t want to think about Grace marrying, either. Turning around, he walked to the back corner of the building and started his lathe. The noise of the grinder would cover any more comments by Sarah. He began to work with vigor, building new wheel hubs as fast as he could shape the blocks of wood.
* * *
Sarah heaved a sigh of exasperation as Levi busied himself as far away from her as possible. Trying to figure out what kind of wife would suit him would be next to impossible if he wouldn’t say more than a dozen words to her.
He hadn’t been exactly talkative during their meal, but perhaps in his own home he would open. He and the boys would appreciate her cooking while Grace was gone, she was certain of that.
She could seek information about Levi’s likes and dislikes from the twins, but involving them came with its own set of drawbacks. They were bright and inquisitive. They might put two and two together and foil her plans by telling Levi what she was up to. Would he mind?
She didn’t know, and she hoped she never had to find out.
She finished the day by getting things ready to do the inventory the following week. Only two customers came in and their requests were easy to handle. Levi managed to stay out of her way completely. No matter where she went, he was just leaving the area with long determined strides. Who would believe they couldn’t exchange as much as a sentence when they were both inside the same building all afternoon? It was almost like he was trying to avoid her. Was he still angry about her advice to Grace?
Rather than become discouraged, Sarah grew more determined. She would discover the real Levi Beachy if it took her all winter.
Admitting only a temporary setback, she stopped trying to corner the man and settled herself with paperwork in the office. As she went through the previous year’s records, she was pleased to see Levi was an excellent bookkeeper. While Grace might take care of the public part of the business, Levi clearly managed the rest with a deft hand. It was something a prospective wife would be impressed with.
When five o’clock rolled around, Sarah went home and gathered what she would need to feed the Beachy family supper. Along with the leftover stew, she packed a loaf of bread and two jars of vegetables she had canned from her own garden. She added a second loaf of bread when she remembered the appetite her brother had during his teenage years.
She carried the makings of the meal to the house next door with a simmering sense of excitement. No wonder her aunt Emma enjoyed matchmaking. Sarah had no idea how exciting it was. Her somber mood and worry about the season had taken a backseat to her enjoyment of the challenge she faced.
Levi had seen her coming. He held open the door. She squeezed past him, brushing against his side in the process. “Danki, Levi.”
His face flushed deep red. “I—I forgot something.”
He rushed out the door, leaving her staring after him. Really? Could he not sit still even in his own home? Miffed that he had once again escaped her, she turned back to see his brothers sitting at the kitchen table, looking at her with wide, hopeful eyes. They resembled a pair of starving kittens in front of an empty milk saucer.
“Gut-n-owed, Sarah,” they said together.
“Good evening,” she replied.
Atlee said, “We’re right sorry we upset you with our teasing Henry Zook today.”
She inclined her head slightly. “It’s forgiven and forgotten. As long as it doesn’t happen again.”
Moses said, “It won’t. When you pull a good joke on a fellow, it’s only funny the first time. He might be expecting it a second time.”
She leveled a stern gaze at him. “If you have no remorse, I can take supper home with me.”
Stifling a grin at their frightened expressions, Sarah glanced at the large box in her arms and the basket hanging on her elbow. “Your supper will appear much faster if I could get a little help.”
They were up like a shot and took her burdens from her. They set everything on the counter and stood aside. Sarah began unloading her goods. To her surprise, the countertop was grimy. The stove was, too. She ran a finger along the back edge of the counter.
This much cooking grease hadn’t accumulated in a single day. Grace clearly didn’t devote much effort to housework. Poor Henry. He would be in for a shock after the wedding if Grace didn’t improve. His mother’s home was always as neat as a pin.
Sarah tried to remember the last time she’d been in the Beachy home. It had been years. Grace was forever dropping by to visit at the fabric shop or coming to Sarah’s house. After Jonas’s death, Sarah had curtailed her visits to friends and neighbors. It became too hard to pretend she was doing better when she wasn’t.
She added one more item to her mental to-do list for the winter. Help Grace get her house in order.
The twins had been smart enough to make sure there was a fire going in the stove. Sarah put on the apron she’d brought with her and got to work. It wasn’t long before the smell of steaming beets, buttered carrots and chicken stew filled the small kitchen. Glancing over her shoulder, she noticed the boys were hovering near the table but they hadn’t taken a seat.
She lifted the lid on the stew and stirred the contents. “It’s almost ready. Will you set the table?”
An alarming amount of clatter followed her request. When she turned around, plates, cups and flatware had been haphazardly set for three places.
“You don’t want me to eat with you?” she asked sweetly.
The twins looked at each other. Atlee said, “I reckon that will be okay.”
“If Levi says it is,” Moses added.
She arched an eyebrow. “Perhaps one of you should go ask him.”
Moses elbowed Atlee. “You go.”
Atlee rubbed his side. “Why me?”
Folding her arms, Sarah asked, “Does Levi object to company?”
Atlee started toward the door. “I don’t know. We never have any.”
How had this family become so isolated in the midst of a generous and caring community? “Surely, your grandfather and your cousins come to visit on Sundays and at the holidays.”
Atlee shook his head. “We normally go to their homes. It’s more fun and the food is better. Grace isn’t a great cook.”
Sarah said, “It’s nice to know that Levi enjoys visiting his family.”
At the door, Atlee said, “Levi never goes if he can help it. He don’t like it when people make fun of him.”
“Why on earth would your family make fun of Levi?”
Moses grimaced. “Grace said he used to stutter when he was little. Our cousins and other kids made fun of him back then.”
Sarah vaguely recalled Levi’s affliction. Was that why he never spoke much? “He doesn’t stutter now.”
“Now, he doesn’t say much of anything. Our uncle calls him Levi Lockjaw,” Atlee said and went outside.
Sarah turned back to the stove and resolved to treat Levi with more kindness in the future. She hadn’t realized how much of a loner he’d become after Jonas’s death. Then again, how coul
d she? She had been wrapped up in her own grief and worries, unable to focus on anything but her work.
The outside door opened a few minutes later. Atlee returned without Levi. “Brother says you may eat here, Sarah. We’re to go ahead. He said he’ll fix something for himself later.”
“He’s not coming in?” she asked in amazement.
Atlee shook his head and took a seat at the table.
Sarah pondered the turn of events as she dished up the meal. Did Levi have that much work to do, or was he simply avoiding her?
The twins fell upon the food like starving dogs. Sarah barely touched hers. Was her company so distasteful that Levi would rather spend the evening in a cold building instead of at his own table if she were there?
If that were the case, she would leave. She stood and carried her plate to the sink.
“Where are you going?” Atlee asked.
“Home. I’ll see you both tomorrow at church.” She gathered her belongings, grabbed her coat from the hook beside the door and went out.
Instead of going home, she entered the shop by the back door. Only one overhead lamp had been lit. It cast a soft glow where Levi sat on a stool at his workbench. He had a new hub wheel in a vise and was chiseling out the slots for the spokes. He hadn’t heard her come in so she had a chance to study him as he concentrated on his work.
What she noticed first about him was his hands. He had sturdy hands, scarred by years of work at his craft, yet he wasn’t clumsy. His movements were sure and deft. His body was relaxed, not tense the way he had carried himself all day.
She decided not to interrupt him. Before she could slip back out the door, he suddenly stiffened. She realized he’d caught her reflection in the window glass.
Gathering her courage, she came forward with her icy fingers gripping each other. “I wanted to let you know I was leaving so that you could come in and eat your supper before it grows cold or the twins devour it.”
“Danki.” He didn’t turn around but kept his back to her.
She couldn’t leave like this. She didn’t want him angry with her. “I’m sorry, Levi.”
“For what?”
She waved her hands in a helpless gesture. “Everything. I’m sorry Grace took off and left you in a lurch, but mostly I’m sorry that you’re angry with me.”
“I’m not angry with you,” he said quietly.
“You’re not?” She took a step closer. When he didn’t say anything else, she moved to stand at the counter beside him. She gestured toward the hub he held. “You do good work.”
“I’m not angry,” he said again.
“It feels like you are. You won’t look at me. You wouldn’t come in to supper. Something is wrong. Is it because I can’t do the work as well as Grace?”
“Nee.”
She held her frustration in check. “Talk to me, Levi. I don’t know what to change if you don’t tell me. Do I have to get a blackboard so you can leave me messages?” she teased, trying to get him to smile.
“It’s a joke to you, isn’t it?” he asked stiffly.
Her teasing had backfired. “Of course not.”
“Grace, the twins, me, we’re all a joke to you.”
“Levi Beachy, what a mean thing to say. Grace is my dear friend. The twins frequently make me cringe or smile, but I don’t see them as a joke. I see them as outgoing, boisterous boys.”
“I saw you and your aunt laughing at Grace and Henry’s argument. I reckon everyone will be talking about my sister’s poor behavior tomorrow.”
She sighed. So that was it. “Levi, I was grinning at my own cleverness because I had convinced my aunt not to mention the incident.”
He cast a sidelong glance of disbelief at her. “You did?”
“Grace is my friend, Levi, just as Jonas was your friend. I had hoped that you and I could be friends, too.”
He was silent for so long that she realized she had her answer. For reasons she didn’t understand, Levi wouldn’t accept her friendship. The knowledge hurt.
“I’ll write to Grace and ask her to return as soon as possible. I’m sorry for the trouble I’ve caused.” She turned to leave.
“Sarah, wait.”
She stopped and looked back. His bright blue eyes were gazing intently at her. A strange quiver centered itself in her chest, causing a catch in her breath.
He said, “I am now, and have always been, your friend.”
The catch moved to her throat. “I’m sorry I didn’t recognize that. Thank you, Levi.”
“It’s what Jonas wanted.”
He was right. Jonas would have wanted them to be friends. Why didn’t that cheer her? Perhaps because she wanted Levi to like her for herself and not because of her husband.
* * *
Early the next morning, Sarah decided to walk to the church service instead of driving her buggy. The preaching was being held at the home of David Nissley and his wife, Martha. Their farm was little more than a quarter of a mile beyond the Hope Springs town limits.
A warm southern wind was melting the snow, making the sunshine feel even brighter. Rivulets of water flowed in the ditches, adding occasional gurgling to the symphony of morning sounds that surrounded her. Numerous Amish families, some on foot, most in buggies and wagons, were all headed in the same direction. Cheerful greetings and pleasant exchanges filled the crisp air. Everyone was glad to see a break in the weather.
Sarah declined numerous offers of a ride, content to stretch her legs on such a fine morning. The icy grip of winter would return all too soon.
She turned in at the farm lane where dozens of buggies were lined up on the hillside just south of the barn. The horses, most still wearing their harnesses, were tied up along the fence, content to munch on the hay spread in front of them or simply doze in the sunshine until they were needed to carry their owners home.
The bulk of the activity was focused around the barn. Men were busy unloading backless seats from the large, gray, boxlike bench wagon that was used to transport the benches from home to home for the services held every other Sunday. Bishop Zook was supervising the unloading. When the wagon was empty, he spoke with his two ministers, and they approached the house.
Sarah entered the farmhouse ahead of them. Inside, it was a beehive of activity as the women and young girls arranged food on counters and tables. Most of the small children were being watched over by their elder sisters or cousins. The young boys were outside playing a game of tag.
Catching sight of her aunt Emma visiting with her daughter-in-law Faith, Ada Kaufman and Mary Shetler, Sarah crossed the room toward them and handed over her basket of food. “Guder mariye.”
“Good morning, Sarah,” her aunt replied. “Isn’t the weather wonderful?”
“It is.” Turning to Mary, Sarah grinned at the child she held, “Goodness, how this little girl is growing. May I hold her?”
“Of course.” Mary handed the baby over with a timid smile.
Sarah took Hannah, enjoying the feel of a baby in her arms. Mary’s life had not been easy, but did she know how blessed she truly was?
Ada said, “She should be growing. She eats like a little piglet.” There was nothing but love in her aged eyes as she gazed at her adopted granddaughter. Ada had opened her home and her heart to the once wayward Amish girl and her baby.
Emma said, “I see the bishop and ministers coming. We’d best hurry and join the others in the barn.”
As she spoke, Bishop Zook and the ministers entered the house and went upstairs where they would discuss the preaching that was to be done that morning. The three-hour-long service would be preached from memory alone. No one was permitted the use of notes. Each man had to speak as God moved him.
Sarah handed the baby back to Mary. The women quickly finished their tasks and left the ho
use.
The barn was already filled with people sitting quietly on rows of backless wooden benches with the women on one side of the aisle and men on the other side. Tarps had been hung over ropes stretched between upright timbers to cordon off an area for the service. Behind them, the sounds of cattle and horses could be heard. The south-facing doors were open to catch what warmth the sunshine could provide.
Sarah took her place among the married women. Beside her, Katie Sutter sat with her three small children, the youngest, Roy, born four months ago. Rachel, the oldest, only four years old, slipped off the bench and crossed the aisle to sit on her father’s lap. The remaining child, little Ira began to pout and fuss at his sister’s desertion.
Katie slipped a string of beads and buttons from her pocket. She handed them to her little one. He was then content and played quietly with his toy.
From the men’s side of the aisle, the song leader announced the hymn. There was a wave of rustling and activity as people open their thick black songbooks. The Ausbund contained the words of all the hymns but no musical scores. The songs were sung from memory and had been passed down through countless generations. They were sung slowly and in unison by people opening their hearts and minds to receive God’s presence without the distraction of musical instruments. The slow cadence allowed everyone to focus on the meaning of the words.
At the end of the first hymn, Sarah took a moment to glance toward the men’s side. She spotted Levi sitting just behind the married men. His brothers sat near the back. The twins were chewing gum and looking bored. Sarah considered asking Katie if she had any additional toys. In truth, the twins were not the only teenagers looking restless. Levi, on the other hand, held his songbook with a look of intense devotion on his face.
He glanced in her direction, and she smiled at him. He immediately looked away and she felt the pinch of his rejection. Why was it that he turned her every overture aside?
The song leader announced the second hymn. O Gott Vater, wir Loben Dich (Oh God the Father, we praise You). It was always the second hymn of an Amish service. Sarah forgot about Levi and his brothers as she joined the entire congregation in singing God’s praise, asking that He allow the ministers to speak His teachings, and praying that the people present would receive His words and take them into their hearts.
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