by Nana Malone
“Don't know, but something’s off.”
Roone was still the perfect gentleman, but on the walk back to the car, I could see it. The subtle shift in him. The walls had been re-erected. It was probably for the best. If I wanted to keep my job, to keep my roots, I couldn’t keep him.
I just had no idea how to break the news to myself.
Roone…
I tried for levity, but I could tell exactly where her mind was. “Stretch, you’re gonna stay with Jessa now. She’s gonna let you come see me on weekends.”
She didn’t even crack a smile as I handed her the giraffe. I’d been shaken seeing Millston too. And since Ariel was behind the dates, I knew he wasn’t there because of the app. The real question was how he’d known to be there.
“He doesn’t know anything, princess.”
She swallowed hard. “I’m telling you, he does. I could hear it in his voice. He knows.”
I reached for her again. “It’ll be all right. I promise. We’ve been careful.”
“Careful. Are you kidding? We were almost caught tonight. I just – I don’t know why, but I’ve been risking everything with you, and I shouldn’t be.”
My stomach fell. “Jessa. Come on. Don’t say that, okay? We’ll figure this out. If push comes to shove, I’ll leave before I let this impact you.”
She shook her head. “What? That’s nutters. I couldn’t let you do that. You’re actually good at this. I couldn’t let you be fired and me stay. It’s not right.”
I held on to her tighter and pulled her to me as my heart raced. I wasn’t letting her go. I’d just gotten started. Just started to — I wasn’t going to let this happen. “Let me figure it out before we do anything drastic. Before anything happens.” I wanted to tell her the truth. I wanted to just spill the beans and let the truth hang between us. We could figure it out after that.
She shook her head. “Roone, this was never supposed to work. I’m pretty sure we knew that. If somehow we haven’t both lost our jobs already, we need to stop.”
“Princess, we’re just getting started. Whatever happens, don’t let him do this. I liked you from the moment I saw you. I liked you more when you fought me throwing you over my shoulder. But do you know the real moment I knew I was fighting a losing battle?”
Her lips quirked. ”When I stole your keys?”
I shook my head. “Not even close. Although, that was when I vowed to make you weak with orgasms so you couldn’t run away.”
She rolled her eyes. “Of course.”
“No, the moment was when I helped you carry in those boxes. You looked at me, and you were so vulnerable. I could see you. The real you. The one who tries to be strong and is afraid of failing. The moment I saw her, I knew I couldn’t stay away. Even when I most certainly should have.”
“You can’t tell me things like that.”
“Why not? It’s the truth.” Shit, I wasn’t above begging. It didn’t even bother me that Ariel could likely hear us. I didn’t want to let her go.
She shook her head. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I let my guard down, just for a second.”
“I liked that your guard was down. And this will be okay, I promise. He doesn’t know anything. He’s just trying to make you spin out and panic. I will take care of this, I swear.”
“How do you plan on doing that? I need this job. This job is everything right now. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. For the first time I have roots. I can’t just walk away.”
“You are better than this job. They honestly wouldn’t thrive without you. You know it, and I know it.”
“It doesn’t matter. What matters is I need the job. I can’t throw it away just to break the rules.”
Shit. How had our roles become reversed? I was the rule follower. I liked my rules. Liked that they made sense. Liked everything neat and tidy. Now I was on the verge of begging for complicated. “Look, just give me a couple of days, okay? We’ll figure it out. If you still feel the same way, I won’t stop you.”
She looked like she wanted to argue, but she let me pull her into my arms and hold her tight. It looked like Ariel and I were going to have to deal with Evan after all.
30
Ariel…
"Excuse me? Are you Willow James?"
The woman turned in front of me with a smile and a question in her eye.
"I'm Ariel. I wanted to ask you, if it's not too much trouble, about Evan Millston?"
Her eyes shuttered all of a sudden. And then she gathered her things from the tabletop at the café. "I'm not gonna talk about him. If you'll excuse me."
"Willow, I'm sorry. That name probably brings up memories you don't want to talk about. But I think a friend of mine might be in trouble with him, and I'm trying to get the facts so I can help her."
"If your friend is somehow caught up with Evan, tell her to end it publicly and painfully. The one thing he'll hate is a scandal."
"That's good to know. But they're not together. She works for him. He's just... maybe it'd be helpful just understanding what happened to you?"
Willow slung her backpack over her shoulder. "I can't talk to you."
I really hated to do this. The poor girl already looked terrified. "Can't or won't? Did they make you sign some kind of NDA?"
"You don't understand."
I put up my hands. "Look, it's completely off the record. I just need to understand what we're dealing with."
She slowed her walk, stopped, and turned to face me. "Look, I worked for him too. I was his assistant four years ago. I was still in college. I was more an intern really, it's not like they paid me a lot. He was helpful. Real helpful. At first, I was a little creeped out because I thought, 'Oh, that's weird. Why is he so helpful to an intern?' But then I realized that was just how he liked to do things. But before I knew it, he sort of... it felt like he was... he felt proprietary toward me. When I got a boyfriend, things got really bad. He just miraculously turned up where we'd be for dates. I would swear that he was around my flat. I finally quit, got a restraining order, the whole deal. That was four years ago, and now I still sometimes think that I see him."
"Did he ever hurt you?"
Willow shook her head. "No. But working with him was difficult. The moment I got a boyfriend, every question became about 'oh did your boyfriend allow you to do that?' Or 'does your boyfriend want you to eat that?' Or 'does your boyfriend know that you wore that to work today?' The constant digs, the picking, the needing to know who my boyfriend was. All of it was just so stressful. He never hurt me, but…"
"If you know anything, anywhere you can point me in the right direction."
"There were rumors that there had been this other girl, someone he'd gone to college with. I don't know her name. She left Evan to work with Rick. She left him to date Rick."
My brows snapped down. "His partner?"
Willow nodded. "Yeah. It was a huge scandal. I guess in college Evan had dated her, and after school when they started their own company, Rick dated her. I don't know how that worked out with all of them, but I know that the girl was so freaked, she left the country. Got some fancy job in Toronto or something. But she would tell Rick all the time that Evan was just around. He didn't believe her. She filed an order of restraint too."
"Has anyone heard from her since she moved? A postcard, letter, email, or something?"
Willow frowned. "I don't know. Maybe an email or something. If you want I can look around for you."
I breathed a sigh of relief. "Yes." I pulled out my card and handed it to her. "I appreciate you talking to me. I know I shouldn't have ambushed you, and I'm sorry. But I'm very worried about my friend."
"Yeah, I understand. I'd be worried too. Hopefully she's got someone looking out for her?"
I smiled to myself. "Yup. That's basically the plan."
Jessa…
I’d made a mistake. A horrible, awful mistake.
I'd completely miscalculated what it would be like to see Roone around the office. Not
that I'd been avoiding him. There was nothing to avoid. After all we were just colleagues, work mates, friends, sort of. Whatever. Also, you shagged him so good, your vagina needs a break.
Also true.
But locked in an office with him at Ben Covington’s office, discussing the restaurant announcement, I could feel the tension between us. I'd had another meeting just prior to Ben’s, so I opted to meet him there.
Liar. Okay fine. I hadn't wanted to ride over with him because his stupid soap would make me weak and melty. I was not a weak and melty person. I was strong. I was not going to lose everything I need and want because of some guy.
"The feedback from the team has been positive so far. They’re all excited to work with Evans. And just so you know, Ryder has been dealt with. Permanently reassigned.”
I blinked at him. I hadn’t said a word. Had Roone? Fuck. Another example of him dealing with something I knew how to handle.
“Well we’re looking forward to all the milestones. Marketing has been working on packaging and imagery already, so we’ll have designs for you to look at in time for the next meeting.”
Ben was watching me, but I was off my game today. Distant, distracted. I felt like I was walking through a fog. Ben stood and shook our hands. The guy was huge. No wonder they called him Big Ben. And he was stupidly good looking in that almost-too-pretty kind of way. But I barely notice because all I could focus on was Roone. It was as if he were sucking all the air out of the room and I couldn't breathe.
As soon as hands were shaken and we were released from the meeting, I bolted. I just needed air. I needed to get to a bathroom, splash cold water on my face, and just take a moment to myself.
Blindly, I searched for a bathroom until I finally stumbled upon a receptionist who pointed me to one down at the end of the hall. I was vaguely aware that Roone was somewhere behind me, calling out my name, but I couldn't stop. I shoved open the door intending to close it behind me, but Roone was right there. "Princess, what's wrong?"
"You. You are what's wrong. Before I met you, shit, I was on my game. Game face. Nothing rattled me. I was so good. I could do the work of three on my own. You turned up, and I can't even make it through a client meeting. All I can do is think about you and never touching you again, and it is fucking with me, and it is not fair. And I realized just how stupid it was for me to think I could handle this, that I could handle you."
I knew I wasn't making a lot of sense. I was blubbering. Honestly, it was embarrassing. But once I started talking, there was no stopping it.
"I just wasn't supposed to like you. And then I liked you. And then I more than liked you. And it isn't fair because Evan knows, and I need this job. I know you don't think that it's important, but this is mine. I fought for this little piece of real estate in the world, and I want to keep it. I promised myself I wouldn't move or run, and now I just can't stay. Every day locked in rooms and offices with you, knowing I can't touch you because it's against the rules. And I broke the rules, so now I might get fired."
Roone's hands were on my shoulders. "Jessa, breathe."
His command shut me up. Which consequently, I also hated. "Don't tell me what to do."
His lips tipped up at the corner. "That's how this works. I tell you what to do, you fight me. I like the fight."
"You realize that's not exactly healthy?"
He shrugged. "No. But pretending that we don't want each other, that's impossible."
"Yeah well, it can't happen."
"Let me be really clear, you and I, Jessa McLean, are happening. It's just a matter of how long you want it to take. I can wait as long as you need me to."
I stared up at him. And my jaw unhinged. "This is crazy."
"Yeah. It is. And there's a whole slew of things I probably need to talk to you about and tell you. But that's all you need to know right now. I'm not going anywhere. So if it takes you a million years to make up your mind, fine. I'll wait. I'll be right here."
"You are the most obstinate, stubborn—"
Roone, of course, impatient as ever, didn't let me finish. His lips brushed over mine, but gently. Then he pulled back. "You were saying? I plan to kiss away any protest you have unless it's the words ‘I don't want this.’ You tell me you don't want me, and I'll leave you alone, I swear."
"You're a lot of things, but you're not stupid. You know I want you, but this isn't what I planned on. This is really unfair. I'm not ready. I just—"
He kissed me again.
Electric currents ran over my skin.
I gasped and parted my lips as a shudder ran through me. Roone groaned low and dragged me closer. His tongue slid over mine, and I couldn't think. He tasted like something sweet and sinful and dangerous, and I couldn’t get enough of him.
When he sucked on my bottom lip, I moaned, meeting his tongue with my own and lazily looping my hands around his neck. I threaded my fingers into his hair, and Roone growled low, his possessive nature coming through.
His thumbs traced over my hipbones, and I shivered. He angled his head and deepened our kiss. Roone kept up the teasing until I panted and breathed out a soft whimper.
With his hands in my curls, he angled my head so he could kiss me deeper and then pressed up against me.
Shit. Could I give this up? This high? This feeling of flying? It was all I’d ever wanted. To love. To have someone take care of me for once.
But the roots I’d planted, the plan I’d wanted for myself was in jeopardy. But Roone… For once I had a risk I wanted to take. One I wasn’t necessarily ready to give up yet.
31
Jessa…
The Covington meeting had ended at six. Then Evan had called me in to run a favor for him. He had some papers he needed delivered, and Roone had insisted on accompanying me.
I was still keyed up from the kiss he’d given me after the meeting. Like I was walking this lust tightrope and Roone was the net below.
He hadn’t so much as held my hand as we walked up the stairs into the block of housing units. But once we turned down our hallway, his fingers gently brushed mine. The hit of electric current was nearly enough to make me moan. Who was I kidding? I wasn’t going to be able to stay away.
One more brush of our fingers and Roone dragged me over to his door and fumbled with his key.
Once we were in, he kicked the door shut and we began tearing at each other, my bag forgotten somewhere near the door.
His hands dug in my hair as he angled me for deeper kisses. With each step, pieces of clothing dropped.
We were naked on his couch with me levered over him. He’d tossed his wallet onto the coffee table once he’d slid on a condom. Slowly, he dragged me down over him, his teeth biting into my lip, and I sank down, my eyes going wide as he nudged me open.
Oh, that delicious stretch as I accommodated to fit him. God, he felt so good, his cock sliding in and out of me slowly, which was just what I needed, just what I’d been craving.
With a growl and his hands on my ass, he shifted our position and stared up at me from under his hooded eyes. “Ride me, baby, it’s your show.”
And I did. Rising over him again and again, I took what I needed. I let go of the fear. Let go of the worry and just felt.
Roone clamped his hands on my hips and held on, digging his fingers into my flesh.
As he drove into me with thrust after thrust, he stared up at my eyes, adoring, full of lust and… something else I couldn’t quite place. Unable to take the intimacy, I closed my eyes, wanting to only focus on the feelings, how he touched me, how the desire and need unfurled within me. But Roone had other plans.
With his thumb and forefinger, he took hold of my chin. “Look at me, Jessa.”
I stubbornly refused to open my eyes. And he immediately stopped thrusting. I snapped my eyes open. “Roone!”
“I asked you to look at me.”
Heat flushed my face. “I can’t… it’s too much.”
He shook his head and started moving inside me again
. “No. It’s perfect.” Pulling me close and levering himself up so we were in a more seated position, he kissed me slow and deep, brooking no argument from me. When he pulled back from the kiss, he resumed the deep thrusts, gently this time, as if we had all the time in the world. “I want you to be well aware of who’s inside you. Who’s making you feel this. How much you need it. How good it feels.”
Pleasure rode my spine, urging me to go faster, and I rocked against him. “Oh my God.”
Roone pumped inside me again. “I’m glad you know.” Capturing my nipple, he pinched gently, and my inner walls quickened.
He repeated the motion. Harder this time. I groaned as bliss chased the initial sting of pain.
“You like that?” His piercing green gaze settled on me.
I nodded. “Y-yes.”
He repeated it, and I tossed my head back. “Roone, please. I need—”
With his other hand, he reached between us and stroked my clit.
“Roone!” To allow him better access, I braced my arms behind me on his knees as I enjoyed his deft thumb and his hard strokes.
My orgasm crashed into me so fast I lost my balance on his knees and fell back. Shocks rippled through my body, and I groaned.
With a muffled curse, Roone grabbed my hips and held tight as he increased his pace. With three more thrusts, he jerked and threw his body back. Inside me, his dick twitched, and I knew he was coming.
Unable to move on my own, I allowed him to pull me close. He kissed my temple and my forehead and my cheeks before settling the throw blanket around us. I made to get up, and he stilled me.
“No. Not yet. I want to hold you for a minute.”
As sleep snuck in like a thief on my consciousness, I prayed I would never have to leave his arms.
Jessa…
I was falling for him.
