by L.H. Cosway
“Lee,” I whispered, trying to absorb the fact that he was planning to go clean, wondering what his brothers thought of it all. “I know who you work for.”
He exhaled. “I thought you might.”
“So, he won’t let you out of your…arrangement?”
“He wouldn’t at first, but we spoke this morning, made a deal. He’s gonna let me and all my brothers make a clean break.”
“If?” I probed.
“If what?”
“There’s got to be a catch.”
“You don’t need to worry about the catch, Karla. Just know that in a couple weeks’ time, I’ll be a free man.”
I didn’t like the sound of that, not at all. Nobody got out of working for a gangster like McGregor without losing something. You had to pay your way, and often money wasn’t the only currency. I wanted to ask more questions, but I knew I wouldn’t get anything out of him. Instead, I asked what my heart wanted to know.
“Are you doing this for me?”
“For you, and for my family. I never wanted this life for my brothers, but it was the only option in front of me at one time.”
Allowing my body to settle into his, I asked gently, “Will you tell me about it? The life you’ve lived.” I paused before adding humorously, “How you learned to jump through the air like Batman, etcetera.”
Lee emitted a soft chuckle, his hand moving to my stomach and feeling up toward my chest. “You wearing a wire, Snap?”
“Oh, shut up, you know I’m not,” I said, laughing when he tickled me.
His hand paused, his thumb brushing softly over my belly, as his smile turned contemplative. “The first time I met him was a couple months after Mum passed.” Instinctively, I knew he was talking about McGregor. “I’d just nicked some old geezer’s wallet, was halfway down the street when he came out from around a corner. I’d never seen anyone so flash — he had all these gold rings, designer suit, the works. Anyway, I thought I’d been caught, but then he started talking me up, telling me I thieved like a pro, said he had work for me if I wanted it.”
“How old were you?”
“Fourteen. Sounds young, but I know people who started earlier. He asked me where I lived and then began coming around all the time. In the end, I didn’t have a choice but to work for him. Stu got in on it, too, and before we knew it, we were turning over four or five cars a night. London’s a big place, ripe for the picking. The money started to roll in, and it felt good. Being able to feed Liam, Trev, and Sophie, put clothes on their backs and send them to school gave me a high. I could give them something our parents never did.
“There were other perks, too. I could buy nice things, go places, have fun. In the end, supply wasn’t meeting demand, so I had to recruit others. I couldn’t hide what I did from Liam and Trev, and I told them point blank they didn’t have to do what I do. They could go to college, get normal jobs, whatever they wanted. Stubbornness runs in the family, though, and they wanted to do their bit. Before I knew it, we were all fully embroiled in the life, no inclination of ever changing.”
“And the Batman stuff?”
Lee laughed softly. “It’s called parkour, you nerd. I suppose I picked it up sort of randomly. Saw a bunch of Spanish students doing it in Hyde Park when I was about fifteen and thought it looked cool as fuck. So I approached the one who seemed like he knew what he was doing the most and asked him to teach me.”
“Clearly, he agreed.”
“Clearly. His name was Alejandro,” said Lee, camping it by putting an accent on the name. I giggled. “Good bloke. I helped him with his conversational English, and he helped me learn how to drop twenty feet without breaking a leg.”
“I’m sure that came in handy.”
Lee nodded. “My brothers loved it, especially Trev. They all wanted to learn. Believe it or not, I never really set out to use it to my advantage. I just wanted to do something fun. I suppose the whole thing sort of…evolved.”
“Is that why you pretend you can’t do it?”
“Come again?”
“You’re not like Trevor — you don’t show off. I’m guessing it’s for discretion. If you see a man hopping off a building to get away from the cops, there are only so many people it could be.” Almost as if my own words had led me to it, I realised why I’d had déjà vu watching Lee jump. It reminded me of the video Tony had shown me of the burglar robbing the cash-for-gold scammers.
“There’s that,” said Lee, drawing me from my thoughts. “Plus, Trevor’s a flashy fucker. He can’t help it, really.” He paused to eye me curiously. “What’s wrong? You look like you saw a ghost.”
I shook my head. “It’s nothing, I just…well, no, it’s not nothing. Can I ask you something?”
“Might as well. This already feels like a This Is Your Life interview,” Lee teased.
I mock-scowled at him. “I saw this surveillance footage of a robbery once. I think it might have been you.”
Lee chuckled. “Was I wearing black and white stripes and carrying a sack with a dollar sign on?”
“No. You were wearing a balaclava, and climbed ten flights of a building before swinging down through the scaffolding.”
A tension fell as his eyes shone in the dark, but he didn’t say anything. Somehow, his silence was more confirmation than words.
“The people you stole from were scamming the elderly. You took their things back and anonymously handed them in to the police. Why?”
He didn’t look at me when he spoke, his posture stiff, almost like he was embarrassed. “You know Mrs Spencer who lives on my road?”
“The old woman you saved dinner for, yes, I remember, Lee. That was really sweet, by the way.”
He huffed awkwardly. “She’s a widow. Been living in that house all her life. When we were kids, she used to get on to Mum about how badly mistreated we all were. She’d even give us food when she could afford it. Well, Mrs Spencer told me how she sent her old wedding ring and a few expensive pieces of jewellery off to those scammers, hoping for some money to do her house up. Obviously, she never saw a penny. I found out where the racket was being run from and put an end to it.”
I stared at him, warmth suffusing my insides. “You’re such a liar.”
Lee frowned at me, confused. “Why would I lie?”
“You said you couldn’t understand why I help people with no payback, but you do it, too. You did it for Mrs Spencer.”
“I care about Mrs Spencer. She’s my neighbour, and she was kind to me when I was just a kid. I could give a fuck about your average Joe Soap walking down the street.”
I just smiled at him.
“I’m being serious, Karla. I’m no saint. Don’t go building any fanciful ideas about me. I’ve robbed from people just like those scammers. I just don’t rob from the vulnerable. I rob from the wealthy.”
“High-end motor vehicles, I know.”
“Yeah, well, not anymore.”
“You really want to get out?” I asked, ever hopeful.
Lee emitted a weary sigh. “I can’t stay on the second-last rung of the ladder forever, Karla. You either move up, or somebody else comes along and moves you out, and I don’t want to move up. Liam’s court date is a couple of weeks away, and if he gets sent down, I’ll never forgive myself. Maybe it’s too late, maybe it’ll be all for nothing, but I at least have to try.”
His words gave me confidence. Perhaps I didn’t have to stop seeing him after all, not forever anyway. We could stay apart until everything settled down, and then we could see where this thing went between us.
Lee picked up my plastic bag and began rooting through it. Pulling out the milk, he asked, “You mind?”
I shook my head. “Not at all.”
He opened the carton and took a long swig before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “I’m hung over as fuck, barely got a wink of sleep last night.”
Right after he said it, I noticed the bags under his eyes. He looked tired. Reaching out, I placed a han
d to his chest and rubbed. “You shouldn’t drink so much.”
Lee let his head fall back, savouring my touch. “Yeah, tell me about it.”
Sometime between us arriving on the roof and now, the sky had darkened to night. It felt peaceful and quiet up there, civilisation far below us. Streetlights glittered in the sky, cars moving along on the roads in the distance.
“Lee,” I said, my voice seeking as it broke though the silence.
“What is it, Snap?”
“What if something bad happens? What if even after you do everything he’s asked of you, he still doesn’t let you go?”
It was a while before he responded, like he was really thinking about it. “There are dishonourable thieves, and there are honourable ones. Despite everything you might have heard about my boss, he falls into the latter category. If he makes a promise, he’ll stick by it, no matter what.”
I stared at him, not sure if I believed that. If McGregor had honour, then he never would’ve had Jennings beaten, or Liam, for that matter. People like him liked to claim they had a code, but when it came down to it, it was dog eat dog. Or maybe Lee’s version of honour was just a lot different from mine.
He looked at me, his eyes fierce. He seemed very sure of what he said. I just hoped his faith wasn’t misplaced. I hoped his plan worked.
Because I wanted to believe that one day we’d look back on all this and wonder how our lives had ever been so tumultuous.
Eighteen
“I bet I can beat you to the ground,” said Lee, his eyes flashing with devilry.
We’d been sitting on the roof for over two hours, talking about life, our past relationships, everything, really. I told him all about Gavin, and what a disloyal, narcissistic arsehole he’d been, and Lee told me all about his ex, Tammy, and how materialistic she was, only really with him so that he’d buy her stuff. What was left unsaid was how we both knew we were the opposites of our ex-partners. I wanted Lee for the core of who he was, and he would never cheat; it wasn’t how he was wired. He was too loyal.
It felt like we’d been trapped together in a bubble neither one of us wanted to leave, subtly finding new ways to touch one another that weren’t explicitly sexual, but still made my bones ache with need.
“What do you mean?”
“You take the stairs. Fuck, you can even take the lift, and I bet I’ll make it to the ground before you.”
His words gave me a little rush, my pulse starting to speed up. There was something about making bets with Lee that was always decidedly exciting.
“And if you win?”
He leaned close, his breath warm amid the cold night air. “I get to kiss you for the last time before everything changes.”
His answer made me shiver. “And if I do?”
He smiled widely, and it only enhanced his handsome features. “You get to kiss me for the last time before everything changes.”
I don’t know why, but I laughed loudly, smiling back at him and holding out my hand. “It’s a deal.”
We shook, and Lee stood. I watched as he walked over to the edge of the building, and all of a sudden my panic set in as I realised what he planned to do. He was going to jump. He still faced me, his back to the edge, and I got up hurriedly, rushing toward him.
“Wait, no, I’m calling it off.”
Lee took his final step backward, his foot meeting the last bit of concrete before there was nothing but air. He raised his hands, still smiling, “A bet’s a bet, Karla.”
Right after he said it he dropped, and I let out a startled yelp, my hand going to my mouth in fright. I ran the last few yards to the edge and looked down, shocked and exhilarated by what I saw.
The balconies of each apartment jutted out from the building, almost like steps on a ladder – if you were a giant. Lee leapt diagonally from one to the next, each balcony bringing him closer to the ground. I put my hand to my chest to feel how hard and fast my heart was beating, my fear lessening as excitement took over. His body moved with purpose, his rangy muscles perfectly aligned, his jumps measured to avoid injury. He was already halfway to the bottom when I realised what a head start I’d given him.
Even though we both got the same thing, no matter who won, my competitive streak set in and I hurried to the lift, no qualms about cheating. By the time I got to the ground floor, my breaths were coming out frantically as I ran from the carriage and outside.
Lee sat confidently on a bench facing the entrance, his arms folded and a cocky grin shaping his lips. I shook my head and laughed, hurrying toward him and stopping only a foot or two away.
“That was incredible. But I think you might be even crazier than Trevor,” I breathed, my words all air.
Lee got up from the bench and closed the distance between us. He was covered in a thin layer of sweat after his exertion, and I savoured his warmth. I wore his jacket, having grown cold up on the roof after a while. He cupped his hands around my face and stared down at me.
“Crazy can be a little exciting, though, yeah?”
I laughed again, this time more breathily. “Yeah.”
And then he kissed me, pressing his mouth to mine and coaxing my tongue to glide with his. I trembled under his assault, my chest on fire and my lungs too full. His kiss was piercing, too much and not enough, and through it I felt him communicate everything he felt inside. I gripped him tight, my fingertips pressing into the dips and lines of his shoulder blades, and tried my damnedest to communicate everything I felt right back.
***
“Mind if I sit?” I asked as I stood by the table Jennings was occupying in the break room. There were a few other officers milling about, but mostly the place was empty. She looked up from her newspaper and frowned, her mouth turning down grimly at the edges.
After a moment of consideration, she motioned for me to join her, and I took the seat on the other side of the table. My lunch consisted of a cheese and ham sandwich, an apple, and a carton of juice. Jennings proceeded to ignore me, reading her paper as I began to eat.
“Anything interesting?” I asked after a minute or two of quiet.
She let out an impatient sigh. “If this is about the application for sergeant, then you’re wasting your time.”
“Don’t worry — I’ve long since given up trying to get on your good side, Katherine. And I’ll keep applying for sergeant until you finally get sick of me and decide to give in. Simple as,” I replied with confidence.
She glanced up from her paper. “Well, then, what do you want?”
“Is it so strange to imagine I might be here for the pleasure of your company?”
Jennings scoffed, and if I wasn’t mistaken, something almost like a smile began to shape her lips. But that couldn’t be right. Looking out the window, I didn’t see any pigs flying.
“I find that terribly hard to believe,” she said stiffly.
“Don’t sell yourself so short. If you’d actually take that stick out of your arse and quit treating me like a particularly unpleasant fungal infection, you’d realise we actually have a lot in common.”
Closing over her paper and giving me her full attention, Jennings folded her arms across her chest and levelled me with a cynical expression. “Now this I have to hear.”
I held up all five fingers. “Well, for one, we’re both tough bitches, and for two, we can handle working in a male-dominated environment without buckling under the pressure. Three, let me see, we both hate my dad. Four, we’re funny.”
Five, we both had love affairs that jeopardised our careers. I left the fifth finger standing.
“Funny?” Jennings asked with a huff of scepticism.
“The other day when Connors wanted to know if he had food in his teeth, you asked him if he cared so much about his appearance, then why was he walking around with a barnet like a crow’s nest?”
“That falls more into the bitch category, if you ask me,” said Jennings. “But he does have awful hair.”
“And a bad attitude. You give put-do
wns where they’re due. Well, except for with me, but I guess you have your reasons for those, which I’ll allow,” I told her cheekily. I was pushing my luck, but if I knew anything about this woman, it was that the only way to get on her good side was to stand my ground. If I tried licking her arse, she’d tell me exactly where to stick it. Sure, I was complimenting her, but with bite. In this instance, the bite was key.
“You’re persistent,” she said, eyeing me shrewdly.
“I have to be, with the likes of you.”
At this she surprised both of us when she huffed a begrudging laugh. “You remind me a lot of your father in that way. And just to be clear, that’s not a compliment.”
“Don’t worry, I know.” I paused to lower my voice. “He does feel bad for what he did to you, though. Well, as bad as a man like my dad can feel about anything, which isn’t much. Usually, his way is the right way, no ifs or buts.” I paused to eye her seriously. “You do know he’s been working so hard on the McGregor case so that he can finally get justice for you.”
“Yes, well, it’s all a bit too little, too late in that regard.”
“Maybe, but we’re all fallible. It’s the ones who can’t accept they’ve made a mistake who have problems.”
Jennings stared at me for a long time, so long I began to grow self-conscious. “Do you know,” she said, “none of the other constables have ever tried to join me for lunch.”
“Well, I’m happy to break you in.”
At this she let out another laugh, a real laugh. I looked out the window again. Yep, still pig-free. “Keep applying for sergeant, Sheehan. Who knows, maybe after ten or fifteen more attempts, you’ll finally get what you want.”
With that she stood and gathered her things, leaving me alone at the table. I picked up my sandwich and took a bite, and after a couple of chews, I started to smile.
***
“I’m telling you, the answer is 9 p.m.,” I told Tony as we discussed the riddle he’d given me weeks ago, the one Stu had solved. It was one of those puzzles that even when you had the answer, it still took a while to get your head around.
