My lips parted and only a little breath escaped. Maybe we just need to talk at the cocktail party. We are too close right now and it’s hard for me to think straight. And I need to be able to think clearly. I should say something. Why can’t I think of anything to say?! My social skills are better than this. What would Dr. Summers have me do? Do I need to start apologizing for last night or for the last 7 weeks? Whatever I say, I need to open my mouth and say it now. It’s hot in here, I thought as I took a step back. I need to take a step back literally and figuratively.
Emanuel stepped forward, backing me into the closed door. I tilted my head up to maintain eye contact. Without a single word being said between us, he leaned down and kissed me lightly. His soft full lips only fleetingly grazed mine before he pulled away, pressing his forehead against mine.
My lips tingled at the brief kiss and I felt my face getting warmer. Okay this is the time to just say I’m sorry. Just say it, I thought as I brought my hands to his chest.
“I love you,” I blurted out in a heated whisper. Instantly, my mouth dropped open in surprise and my preplanned words evaporated from my open mouth. I wanted to look away, but I couldn’t. No no no no no no no no I’m sorry! I meant to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that. I love him…God, I love him. But I’m not ready to say it to him. I can’t get involved with him. I won’t survive hurting him again. I can’t believe I said that, I thought apprehensively as I watched the way Emanuel’s eyes enlarged at my unintentional admission.
Thunderous clapping and catcalling erupted from the auditorium and we both flinched. “Shit!” Emanuel mumbled as he quickly went over to the switchboard and started hitting buttons. With his back toward me, I took that opportunity to sneak out of the room. As soon as I was almost out of the door, he looked over his shoulder at me. I quickly pulled the door closed behind me and walked swiftly in the direction of the crowd.
Upstairs, there were four different dance rooms and the majority of the crowd was in one or the other. The first room I came to was the white room. Classical music played as the black leotard wearing wait staff served heavy hors d’oeuvres on silver platters. The linens were crisp white on the bar top tables. In the middle of each table were various white flowers. The room looked clean and bright.
The second room was the red room. Sensual R&B music played through hidden speakers and red drapes hung fluidly from the ceilings. The linens on the bar top tables were deep red and each centerpiece included a red flower arrangement. The wait staff consisted of two women and one man in black leotards and traditional ballet garb serving champagne and various desserts. The room screamed sex between the color and the pulsating beat of the music. The third and fourth rooms were locked.
Spotting Emily and Anthony, I made my way to the end of the long hallway. “Emily! That was awesome!”
Emily looked absolutely thrilled. “Thank you! I’m so glad that you’re here!”
“Me too,” I smiled warmly at her and we hugged tightly. Pulling away, I said, “You two are very cute together.” I motioned between the two of them.
They smiled widely and looked adoringly at one another. I laughed. We talked for a few minutes before we were interrupted by potential clients and investors. I excused myself and walked downstairs. I just need a quiet place to think. The bathroom down here is probably less crowded, I reasoned to myself as I scoped the room out for Emanuel. Not seeing him, I walked in the direction of the restroom which was near Emily’s office.
“Oh!” I gasped as Emanuel opened the door to Emily’s office as soon as I approached. I stopped in my tracks. He looked as surprised as I was, but he recovered more quickly.
Grabbing my arm, he pulled me into the office. I should walk away, I thought as I let him lead me into the office. After I walked through the threshold of the room, he closed and locked the door behind me. I matched his gaze to give the impression of confidence, but inside, I was a mess as I toyed with my clutch.
Emanuel took off his jacket slowly and I sucked in quick breath and took a step back. I need to leave, I thought as he moved forward so he could drape his jacket over the back of the chair closest to him.
“Sahara… do you have anything you want to say to me,” Emanuel uttered in a painfully soft voice causing my breath to hitch. He took a step forward and I didn’t move.
I opened my mouth and then shut it instantly. Why won’t my heart stop beating so fast? Breathe. Breathe. Breathe, I thought as I watched him run his hands through his hair.
He closed his eyes tightly and sighed roughly. When his eyes met mine again, I couldn’t read his expression. “What do you want from me?” Emanuel demanded quietly.
Taking a trembling breath, I dropped my eyes to his shiny black shoes. I don’t deserve all that I want, I silently replied, shaking my head. The thought was unexpected, but completely true.
I shrugged slightly and looked through my lashes at Emanuel’s stoic face. When our eyes met, I shivered at the intensity and closed my own eyes. He’s too close. He’s too sexy. He looks and smells incredible. I can’t focus, I thought in a rush.
Suddenly, Emanuel had pinned me against the back wall. His body was pressed against me and his face was mere inches from mine. My eyes fell to his lips and lingered before traveling back to his eyes. He was so close and my skin burned in anticipation. Emanuel moved his hands from my shoulders and trailed them down my bare arms. Everywhere he touched seemed to ignite a fire inside me. He dipped his head so that his lips were right up against my ear.
“What do you want Sahara?” Emanuel growled sexily. His minty breath tickled my ear. His voice and his words made everything between my thighs clench.
“You.” My voice was barely audible as I breathed out my response.
As soon as the words were out of my mouth, Emanuel’s mouth was on me. He parted my full lips with his tongue and kissed me hard and deep. I ran my hands through his thick hair and tugged lightly. I’ve always wanted to do that, I thought as the kiss deepened. When he attempted to pull away, I whimpered and pulled his hair harder. He groaned in response and allowed his hands to slowly roam down my back and over the curve of my ass. Pulling me firmly against his body, I could feel how hard he was and that only turned me on more. He trailed kisses from my lips across my cheek and down my neck. As he was nibbling on my collarbone, his hands worked their way underneath my dress. When his fingers grazed the lace material of my G-string, he rested his forehead against my shoulder and made the sexiest noise.
“Your panties are soaked,” Emanuel whispered as he rubbed me through the damp material. He lifted his head off of my shoulder and wrapped his arm around my waist. Delivering soft kisses against my lips, Emanuel used his other hand to play with my panty line.
“You said you loved me earlier…” He kissed me deeper, allowing our tongues to caress before he pulled away. “And then you bolted…” He sucked on my bottom lip before catching it between his teeth, tugging gently. “Why?” he asked just as he tore my G-string from my body. I let out a noise that was part gasp and part moan as the thin strings of material briefly bit into my skin before shredding easily. My knees buckled.
Holding me steady with his arm and using the wall as a prop, his fingers made direct contact with me for the first time and I moaned loudly. Fisting his hair, I pulled his mouth to me and kissed him with a passion that had built up for over a decade. God, I want him. I’ve always wanted him, I thought longingly. The pull deep inside me built to be unbearable as his stroke became more focused. I felt how hard he was and my breathing became more labored. “Answer me,” he commanded as he brought his forehead to mine, his eyes flashed heatedly.
How am I supposed to think straight, let alone speak when he’s touching me, I mused as I struggled to keep eye contact with him. My eyes fluttered shut and he stilled his fingers. My hips undulated against his still fingers. I wanted more; I needed more. My eyes opened slowly and he was watching me. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop, I thought as my gaze dropped to his lip
s as his tongue slowly and seductively licked them. That tongue.
I bit my lip as my chest heaved. “I’m afraid,” I admitted softly. He resumed his stroking and his touch felt electric as his fingers slid across the most sensitive part of me. I gripped his shoulders, panting.
“What are you afraid of Sahara?” Emanuel was breathing as hard as I was in the soundproof room.
I didn’t respond immediately. He hooked two fingers inside me and held them motionless. I started to grind my hips on his hand, but he held me tighter, subduing me. I felt him starting to pull out and I whimpered again.
Closing my eyes and dropping my head forward, I breathed, “I’m scared of this. I’m scared of us. I’m scared of how I feel about you. I’m scared of how much I feel for you. It’s too much. It’s all too much.”
I couldn’t bring myself to open my eyes to look into his so I kept them closed and everything seemed heightened. I could feel him staring at me. I could feel his accelerated heart rate as it pounded against his chest. I could feel the rapid bursts of air from his ragged breathing. And I could definitely feel his fingers inside me. But he didn’t say anything.
Instead of responding verbally, his fingers expertly moved in and out of me as his mouth captured my own. I moaned as his tongue forced its way into my mouth. My arousal grew as we kissed with reckless abandon. My hands were all over him. Every inch of his body I could touch, I touched. The harder he worked himself in and out of me, the harder he became against me.
“I’ve wanted to touch you for so long…” Emanuel whispered hoarsely against my lips. “And taste you.”
Untangling my fingers from his hair, he positioned my hands to hold my dress up to my waist. With my back against the wall, he lifted my leg and placed it over his shoulder. He continued working his fingers inside me and I incoherently moaned his name repeatedly. In response, his tongue slid across my sensitive flesh, causing everything to go black as I arched my back violently and bucked against his tongue.
With that, the tension that had been building released from deep in my core and spread deliciously through the rest of my body. I feverishly gyrated against his hand and tongue. I let go of my dress and let my fingers work their way through his dark hair. I rode the entire wave and he never let up, he never stopped tasting me. Then my mind went blank and temporarily, I was immobilized. Once the last wave of pleasure vanished, I sagged against the wall. I opened my eyes gradually as he stood. Licking his lips slowly, he watched me as I panted. His chest heaved in time with mine and I saw a pained look in his eyes.
Pressing his forehead against mine, “Say it,” he commanded. His tone wasn’t pleading, but his eyes were.
“I love you,” I admitted breathlessly.
Chapter 14
The intimate admission was disrupted by the knock on the door. Our private bubble burst as we were startled into motion, straightening our clothes. The material of my dress wasn’t as wrinkled as I thought it’d be, but I didn’t look as polished as I had earlier in the evening. Emanuel bent over and picked up the lace material that used to be my G-string and stuffed it in his pocket. Glancing at the clock on Emily’s desk, I saw that it had been thirty minutes since I had been participating in the cocktail portion of the evening. Hurriedly, I fixed his bowtie as he pulled his jacket on. The second series of knocks were harder and more insistent.
Since Emanuel was still visibly aroused, I waited until he was sitting behind Emily’s desk before I opened the door.
Despite the post-orgasm glow, I squared my shoulders and conjured my most professional self. “Yes?” I asked as I whipped the door open.
“Hi. I’m Carlton Walter. I’m a journalist with Center Stage, The Magazine. I’m looking for Emily,” the journalist stated as he adjusted his thick rimmed brown glasses.
“She should be in one of the rooms upstairs. I can help you locate her,” I assured the man kindly. I glanced over my shoulder at Emanuel who was eyeing me with a slight smirk. He looked so sexy reclined in the chair, running his finger across his moist lips. Why does he have to be so sexy? I wondered as my entire body heated under the intensity of his gaze. Shaking my head, I walked out of the room, closing the door behind me.
Emily was not hard to find in the crowded red room. She was in her element and she shined. Emily and Anthony were discussing the logistics of bringing a well-known play to Thomasville with two casually dressed men when I walked up with the journalist.
“…and that will surely bring people out. Let’s schedule a meeting next week!” Emily said as we walked up. She shook each man’s hand and then smiled brightly at me.
“Emily, this is Mr. Walter from Center Stage, The Magazine,” I explained as the two shook hands.
“Hi Mr. Walter! Thank you for coming out tonight,” Emily replied excitedly.
“Call me Carlton. Thank you for having me. I must leave, but I would love to interview you for our magazine this upcoming week. Here’s my card. Contact me so we can set something up.”
“That sounds fantastic. Thank you again for coming Carlton. I will contact you Tuesday.”
They shook hands and Carlton disappeared in the crowd, heading toward the stairwell. We spent the next few minutes congratulating Emily on her upcoming interview. Emily filled me in on the prospective investors and shows she’s already informally secured. Anthony’s imitation of Emily’s excitement over striking a deal with Delta Southern University’s School of Dance was hilarious. We laughed as he poked fun at her excited hops good naturedly. Interrupting the laughter, bells and chimes simultaneously went off as the lights dimmed silencing the large crowd. Emily squealed and squeezed my arm. I smiled curiously at her before directing my attention to the door.
In formal wait staff attire, a man with a bell stood in the doorway. “Dinner is served. Please follow me.” His tone was ominous which added to the intrigue.
Hushed whispers and giggles erupted through the crowd as everyone looked around excitedly. Emily’s smile was infectious as we waited for everyone to vacate the red room. Once the last person was out, the three of us walked to the exit. I wonder what the surprise is, I thought as all of the guests from both the red and white rooms were filtering into one of the previously locked rooms.
I audibly gasped when we walked into the dance room. The black, white and red décor transformed the dance room into a formal ballroom. The wait staff and band members wore black and white tuxedos. The tables were arranged in a ‘U’ formation surrounding a decent sized dance floor. The band was positioned on a mobile stage at the top of the ‘U’. With everyone seated, Emily directed us to the table closest to the band.
“Emily, wow,” I breathed as I took in the room. “You went all out.”
“Yes…you are looking at the contents of my savings account.”
I turned my head quickly to catch her eye, wanting to gauge how serious she was. Emily winked and then greeted her parents as we reached the table. Mr. and Mrs. Mills were seated at the round table with Mr. and Mrs. McMannus. Anthony pulled out the chair for Emily and she smiled up at him sweetly when he pushed the chair in. I pulled out my own chair and before I could sit, I felt a hand wrap around my elbow.
“Allow me,” Emanuel whispered in my ear, helping me into my seat.
I felt my skin heat instantly and knew everyone at the table was staring. Emily discreetly poked my leg to get my attention as Emanuel took his seat beside me. When I looked at her, she raised one perfectly arched eyebrow and smiled knowingly. Utilizing all of my strength, I looked back at her quizzically and gave her a little shrug. She giggled and I turned my head before she could see me smile.
The lights flickered and the excited buzz in the room died down to a hushed murmur. Waiters and waitresses brought out main course options of chicken, pasta, or black bean and cheese enchiladas. The food was cooked to delicious perfection and every morsel melted in my mouth. Emanuel and I stole glances at one another as we made polite conversation. It took everything in me not to participate as he c
asually flirted with me throughout the night, but it felt awkward sitting at the table surrounded by people I considered family wearing no panties. Besides that, the conversation flowed freely. We laughed hard and often. And even though I did more listening than contributing to the conversation, I felt at ease. I haven’t felt like this in a long time. I feel at home, I thought as I glanced at the smiling faces around the table.
“That was delicious,” I raved to no one in particular as our plates were removed from the table.
Emanuel leaned into my ear and breathed, “Yes it was.” Then he sat back in his chair like nothing happened.
When our eyes met, I knew instantly he was not talking about dinner. The blush that spread over my body was immediate and uncontrollable. I looked down at my tightly clasped hands and prayed no one overheard him. Glancing around the table to ensure no one suspected anything, my eyes landed back on his face. The amused smile that played on his lips pushed my buttons and turned me on at the same time. Oh he thinks this is funny. He’s doing this on purpose, I grumbled with embarrassment to myself as I crossed my legs to dull the ache between them. We haven’t all been together in happy circumstances in ten years and he’s over here trying to make this really awkward. He must think making inappropriate sexual innuendos in front of everyone to embarrass me is okay. I narrowed my eyes, glaring at him, before I turned my entire body toward Emily.
The band started with a mellow vibe playing jazz versions of contemporary songs. Although the majority of the attendees were dancers or dancing enthusiasts, most people seemed content with mingling and rocking in their seats. When the band started playing a jazz infused version of ‘Crazy In Love,’ my heart fluttered. I looked at Emanuel and gone was that self-satisfied smirk. In its place, a smile that was almost nervous as he looked away from me and ran his hands through his hair. Oh now he looks embarrassed, I thought incredulously as I watched the dichotomy of bad ass Emanuel and introverted, shy Emanuel revealed.
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