He needed to be alone so he could think.
No.
To get shitfaced drunk and mourn what he’d lost today out of stupidity and carelessness.
Before working for Elizabeth, he never got attached to a job. There was no point in doing so. The fact of life was that some people died.
Yes, it was his job to keep them alive, but shit happened and sometimes, things were out of your control. Unfortunately, for him, with this assignment, he had let himself care.
Elizabeth had become special to him.
When he and Blue were struggling, she stepped in and helped.
When he and Blue had been abducted, she’d saved them both.
Now he’d dropped the ball, and she’d been taken. He felt like shit. Worse, Ethan had tested him, and on top of letting her be taken, he’d offered his resignation.
And it was accepted.
Oh, he really needed to get drunk so he could wallow, but the whole six-pack didn’t help.
It only made him more miserable as he was forced to think about the whole, shitty day.
As he sat there, parked on his couch, he kept drinking in hopes to numb the pain.
It wasn’t working. Instead, he began getting angry. Angry at her for always being a target, and angry at Ethan for testing him in some shitty game.
Well, fuck them!
Fuck the world!
Ivan would move on. He didn’t need that protection duty. He didn’t need to worry about Elizabeth. He was going to be fine even if he would miss her.
God!
The anger was gone.
Here came the rollercoaster of sorrow.
As he sat there, he wanted to call her and apologize, but he wasn’t about to piss off Ethan Blackhawk. He’d get some shitty assignment as far away from her as possible.
Then he began worrying about his fiancée. She worked for them, and that meant constant contact. It meant hearing about them, and what he’d once had.
Well, she’d have to leave her job.
That was a whole other mess that scared him. Ivan only had her left. He couldn’t lose his girl on top of this.
When his doorbell rang, he chugged the last of his beer, and headed toward the door. As he opened it, he was a little surprised to see Ethan and Callen standing there.
Then again, he wasn’t.
Of course they’d show up to kick his ass. The two brothers did everything together.
Yeah, he didn’t understand that since he was an only child. The Marines were as close as he had to a sibling—until Elizabeth.
Well, here came the climb of anger as it came back.
“Go away,” he stated, slamming the door.
As he headed back to the couch, he heard the knob jiggle. Then he heard it open.
What the hell?
When he turned, he saw them standing there.
They didn’t look happy.
“What’s this? Come here to kick the hell out of me because I fucked up? Well, go ahead. I know what I did. I know I screwed-up, and it could have cost Elizabeth her life. I know that my carelessness nearly had a bad outcome.”
They let him rage.
Both men knew that when there was this much anger, there was generally another source. Ivan was being eaten alive by something, and they didn’t think today was behind it.
“Well, I’m used to fucking up. See, I was in charge of keeping my eyes open that day in the sandbox. I wasn’t paying attention, and I nearly died. Know who paid?” he asked, standing there all angry.
“Who?” Callen asked, clearly seeing that this was a long time coming. Ivan needed to vent, and it looked they were going to be the ones who listened.
If anything, Callen understood.
Life was a bitch at times.
“The three men I was in charge of protecting died. I let them down too. So, fuck you, Blackhawk. I did walk away. It’s what I do. I screwup, and I walk away! I don’t need your shitty-ass test to tell me I’m a fucking coward!”
Well, this was NOT what they were expecting.
Ivan threw his beer bottle so hard it shattered against the wall.
It was clear he was struggling.
Someone came home from the Middle East riddled with shrapnel and guilt.
“I get your anger. Only, I’m madder at me than either of you could ever be. She trusted me to have her back. I let her down. I don’t give a shit about me. I really don’t. I care about few people in this world. Next to Blue, she’s about it. She has never doubted me, and I gave her reason to today. That’s why I offered up my resignation. I can’t bear to see the disappointment in her eyes when she looks at me.”
“You’re an idiot,” Ethan stated, knowing it was time for all of them to get off of the pity party train.
“WHAT?” he asked.
“You heard me. You’re a coward. You can’t run forever. In our world, you fuck up, you fix it, and you don’t let it happen again. I gave you the rope to hang yourself or climb out of the shitmess, Ivan. This is on you—not me. I don’t know why I came here. You’re a lost cause.”
Callen saw it coming.
Ivan snapped.
He sucker punched Ethan so hard, his brother hit the wall. Before they knew what happened, Ivan was on him. He began wailing on Ethan.
Well, shit!
Callen couldn't let that happen, even if he thought his brother did something shitty with testing the man.
So, Callen jumped into the fray, breaking a table, a chair, and finally pinning Ivan beneath him on the floor.
He may be little, but the man was freaking strong—plus the beer didn’t help.
Ethan got up and crossed to him as he wiped his mouth on his hand.
He crouched down and stared the struggling man in the eyes.
“She would NEVER look at you in disappointment. She loves you too. Instead of thinking about yourself, all I was asking is for you think about her. For once, Ivan, don’t run. It’s easy to run from the Marines, and it was easy to run from duty when it didn’t work out for you and Blue at first. She fought for you. How about you fight for her? I wasn’t disappointed in you until you ran.”
Callen got off of him.
Ivan sat on the floor.
“I don’t understand any of this,” he said. “You don’t want me protecting her. I could tell today.”
“I was angry. I was protecting my wife and leaving the choice up to you. I can’t fight for you, Ivan. You have to fight for you. Only, I see now that I may have failed her too. She is safer with you than without you, and God knows you need a freaking babysitter. You can’t wail on a Fed!”
He didn’t understand anything.
“Why are you here?”
“We came here to get you to come back, but I can see that you’ve made up your mind. You don’t want to protect her.”
“I can’t.”
Ethan and Callen got up.
“She won’t have protection then. She refused it. So, if you don’t show up tomorrow, she’s out there with just Saint watching her and Callen.”
His heart skipped.
“She’s a menace! She needs a platoon of Marines to do the job! Don’t let her go out alone!”
Ethan fixed his shirt and tucked it back into his dress pants. He was glad he left the two security guys outside. They would have shot Ivan in the ass for this stunt.
“Too bad. I can’t find one good Marine let alone a platoon.”
Ivan stared at him as he let what he was saying sink in. It hurt, and it scared him.
“Good luck, soldier,” he said. Then he faced his brother. “Callen, let’s go.”
They headed out, leaving Ivan to stand there alone.
His heart was heavy.
His head hurt.
And now even more hung in the balance.
He needed to make one hell of a choice.
And fast.
* * * B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x * * *
This was bad news.
Word had travelled
through the White House. The FBI was going to be taking over the case. If that happened, this would be a nightmare.
There were loose ends.
There were people who knew too much.
Now, they had to be handled.
The truth couldn’t come out.
If it did, everything would be…ruined.
This was desperation now. It was time to cover it up so people would remain safe.
It looked like his death wasn’t going to be the first, or the last. It was time to clean up the trail.
And hopefully, escape.
* * * B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x * * *
Fort Whitefox-Blackhawk
Monday Nine P.M.
Oh, she was pissed at ONE of them—and not Callen.
As soon as Callen and Ethan returned to the house, they found her in the living room with their kids. She’d been talking to them, playing a board game, and gearing up for a marathon of a case. The entire time, she wouldn't even acknowledge Ethan’s presence.
Her anger was palpable.
It was on her face.
She and Chris were trying to be normal, but beneath the smile, there was more. Ethan would be an idiot to miss it. He’d really screwed-up.
His wife was not happy.
Angry.
Disappointed.
It was funny because he’d felt all that and more when he had been faced with Ivan and his mistake. Now, the irritation wasn’t aimed at him. It was all directed at Ethan.
Even though he tried to make it right, she didn’t want to hear it. Elizabeth was pissed, and she had every right to be. Ethan had overstepped the boundary in anger, and it was clear there was hell to pay.
“I tried,” Ethan stated, out of the blue. When she didn’t even acknowledge him, he’d had enough. “Really? You want to do this?” he asked. “You want to freeze me out? I thought we learned in counseling that this was NOT the way to fight when we had an issue. Isn’t that what I did once before, and it almost caused a divorce?”
At the mention of that word, the one he knew scared her, she glanced over at him.
“You’re right. Ignoring you isn’t going to work, and I won’t fight dirty. Maybe I should throw down some test.”
He got it.
He’d screwed-up.
“I said I was sorry.”
“Great.”
“Are you going to be angry at me for a long time over this? I told you I tried. I can’t hold him at gunpoint. He’s fighting his own demons, Elizabeth. He turned in his resignation not me. If he’d left me alone until tomorrow, this wouldn’t have ended like this. I had a really shitty day too! I thought my wife was dead!”
He had a point.
This day had worn them all down, and she couldn’t make him suffer. She wouldn’t.
“You’re right, Ethan. I’m just pissed. I don’t blame you. If he wants to leave, that’s on him.”
“He really tried,” Callen stated. “We both did. We went there to fix this, and Ivan isn’t there mentally over this.”
They told her what happened.
The anger abated, and there was sympathy. Ethan wasn’t a bad guy. He really wasn’t. If he tried, and Ivan wasn’t receptive to it, so be it.
She wiped her eyes.
Chris held her and ran his hand up and down her back to soothe her.
“Really, it’s okay. I’m sorry I got bitchy,” she stated. “You’re not the enemy. It’s been a shitty day for all of us. You were freaked-out, and he caught you at a bad moment. He has to make his own choices.”
“Take Wilcox tomorrow.”
“Oh, I’d rather screw a drunken porcupine on our first damn date.”
“Kinky,” Chris said. “Can you talk me through how that would work? I’m curious.”
“They might have porn like that if you want to borrow some lube and tissues,” Callen offered.
It made her laugh.
The men were trying, and she’d try too.
Ethan wasn’t giving up on talking her into security. He’d be inside all day. He’d be fine. The issue was they’d burned through a few guys.
Rory quit.
Ivan quit.
Heath was in Vegas.
“Take Wilcox tomorrow. While you hate his guts, he won’t let you down. He’s very dedicated. I know he’s not Heath or Ivan.”
“No one could be Heath,” she said. “he was an original, and I wish we never brought him to Vegas. I miss him.”
He agreed.
“And no one will be Ivan,” she stated. “That’s why I pass on security. I have Callen and there’s Saint.”
Yeah, he saw that now.
Only, Ethan wished he’d thought about this when Ivan had been standing in front of him with that resignation letter.
Hindsight was twenty-twenty.
“I really am sorry. I tried.”
She was aware. Ethan had gone and apologized, and that was all she could hope for. In their family, if you made a mistake, you faced it.
There was a knock on the door.
“I’ll get it,” Ethan stated.
He headed toward the main door. When he opened it, he expected security. They did their final rounds around this time. Instead, he was caught WAY off guard.
It was Ivan in full military uniform. Beside him stood Johnny.
“Sir, he was stopped at the gate. I wouldn’t have brought him up, but it’s Ivan. Sir…”
He understood.
“It’s okay, Johnny. I’ll take it from here,” Ethan stated, curious what the man wanted.
“He wasn’t armed.”
Well, that eliminated him trying to gun them all down. That was good to avoid.
“Thanks, Johnny. I’ll send him out when he’s done talking to me.”
The man headed back down the driveway.
Ethan focused his attention on the man.
“Uh, the recruiting office is in town.”
He took off his cover and tucked it beneath his arm before he even spoke. His body stayed ramrod stiff.
“I would like to speak to your wife, sir, if that’s possible. I know it’s late, but it’s important.”
How could he say no? Ethan was too curious to see what the man was planning, so he invited him in.
“Elizabeth, there’s someone here to see you,” he called, getting her attention.
She left their kids in the living room and headed his way. As she reached the foyer, she stopped. When she saw Ivan, she didn’t know what to say.
What was he doing at their place?
He was in his full-dress blues, and there was a chest full of medals attached to it. His hat was beneath his arm, and his body was at attention.
Like a Marine.
“Ivan?”
“Ma’am, it’s been brought to my attention that you need a platoon of Marines to keep you safe. I may not be a platoon, ma’am, but I will do my best to make sure that you do not go down in the line of duty. I promise to uphold my duty, fight until the bitter end, and do anything it takes to never leave a soldier behind.”
Tears filled her eyes.
He was coming back. Ivan wasn’t bailing on her. He had worked through it, and he wanted to do the job. Elizabeth knew this wasn’t easy for him. He didn’t put on his uniform for just anyone. He was saving it for his wedding day.
“Ivan.”
“I am not going to run, ma’am. I am going to stand and fight. I’ve run too much in my life, and I don’t want to be a coward. I want to be a hero again. I earned every one of these medals on my chest, but they mean nothing if I leave someone behind. I won’t leave you behind. I can’t.”
Ethan smiled.
Yeah, this was going to be fine. His lecture sank in, and Ivan realized that family stuck—at least their family did.
“Ma’am, if it is okay with you, may I take back my resignation, and continue on as your personal protection duty, ma’am?”
“I don’t believe I asked you to resign,” she stated.
“No, ma’am, you did not. I failed, and I was embarrassed to face you. Failure is not an option. I won’t let it happen again,” he promised.
“I know you won’t.”
“I also, ma’am, would like to apologize for punching your husband in the face. At the time, he deserved it. I would do it again. He is infuriating, ma’am. You deserve a medal for putting up with that chip on his shoulder.”
“HEY!” Ethan stated.
“The chip on his well-dressed shoulder,” Ivan said, correcting himself.
She laughed, as did Ethan.
“Oh, well, at least someone sees it other than me. I’m not the crazy one.”
“This will be dangerous, ma’am, and I want to give you something.”
She didn’t know where this was heading.
“Okay.”
He unpinned his purple heart and walked toward her. This time, when he spoke, gone was the sharp worded staccato, and in its place was Ivan’s ‘street’ voice.
“You earned this today, Elizabeth,” he said, pinning it to her shirt. “You are the toughest person I know, and I want you to know that you are my sister. You may not have gone through basic training with me, but you’ve gone through plenty of battles and I am honored to be here for you like I know you’ve been for me. A Marine isn’t made. Sometimes, they’re just born to do the duty.”
And that was all it took.
Elizabeth broke.
“Oh, Ivan. You’re such a toadstool.”
She hugged him.
From the doorway, Callen smiled.
“Well, this worked out for once. I can honestly say I’m surprised.”
Ethan was too.
It looked like their luck was changing.
“Will you still be my best man?” he asked, when she set him free. “I’ll be in my uniform again on my wedding day, and I would love if you’d be there to get me through this. Marriage is scary, and a lot of work. I need you. I have never had a sister until I was saddled with you, Brunhilda. Now, I’ll never be the same again. You broke me,” he said, touching his heart, “and fixed me in ways I can’t even begin to explain.”
All the King's Henchmen Page 23
