I couldn’t stop the little groan that escaped my mouth. That earned me a smack on the thigh.
“Hush. Stay still.” I yanked at the ropes, but they were tied well. He’d probably been a damn boy scout or something. Or maybe not. I couldn’t see Fin at a boy scout meeting, not even when he’d been younger.
The torture continued until I couldn’t stand it anymore.
“Fin!”
He froze, and I hoped I wasn’t going to be in too much trouble. Or maybe I wanted a little trouble.
“If that’s what you want,” he said, and then thrust into me. Hard. It was like last night, when we’d battled with each other. Only this time, he had the upper hand.
I tried to reach for him, to pull him closer, to do something, but I couldn’t. The ropes stopped me. Fin noticed my struggle and he paused, halfway inside me, his hips grinding to a halt.
“Stop fighting and let yourself feel. Let yourself feel my weight on top you, my cock inside you. Let go, Marisol.” Easy for him to say. He wasn’t the one tied up.
The ropes were soft, but they’d still started to rub a little against my skin. I was trying to let go, but letting go when you were tied up wasn’t easy.
“Breathe for me. In through your nose and out through your mouth. Count to five with each breath and hold it for a moment.” He was still inside me. Breathing. I could breathe. I did it all the time.
In. And. Out.
“That’s my girl. Open yourself up. Feel me.” I had to admit, the breathing did help, but it was hard to keep up when he rolled his hips and started thrusting again, this time slower. Letting me get the feel of it. Of him.
Energy started building down below again, and I was headed toward yet another climax. Was this my gift? Orgasms wrapped up and tied with rope?
I came again, my hips rocking and pleasure flooding through me. Fin pumped his hips a few more times, and then I heard the sound of his climax.
He pulled out and climbed off the bed. “You may speak now.”
I turned my head toward the sound of his voice. “You can get these knots undone again, right?”
He laughed darkly. “Who said I’m going to untie you yet?”
By the time the dawn came, Fin had tied me up in several different ways and fucked me so much I could barely remember my own name. I didn’t know if I’d make it to class, but it wasn’t because of grief. It was because I couldn’t walk.
“That wasn’t your present,” he said as he coiled the rope back up and I rubbed my wrists.
“It wasn’t? Then what was that?” Other than mind-blowing, earth-shattering sex.
“That was me wanting you to remember me when I leave. Your real present is this,” he said, pulling something out of the top drawer of his dresser.
He handed me what turned out to be a picture. A picture of a cute chubby boy with floppy dark hair and beautiful blue eyes, posed against a background. Clearly a professional shot.
I sat up in bed and held the picture up to the light. “This is you, isn’t it?”
He pulled on his pants and sat next to me. “That’s me. Age ten, I think. Proof that I was a chubby kid. And proof that I don’t lie.”
I wanted to pinch that kid’s cheeks, but there was already a sadness in his eyes. Ten. That was the year he’d tried to kill himself. Was it before or after this picture was taken? I was afraid to ask.
“There’s something else, too. Hold out your hand.” I did as he said and he dropped a key into my palm.
“This is a key to the apartment. You can come here whenever you want. Stay, read my books, whatever makes you happy. It’ll please me to know that someone will get use out of it. And I’ll like knowing you’re here.”
“Wow, you really trust me, don’t you?”
“Yes.”
Tears started welling up in my eyes, and I knew this key was his way of saying goodbye. Or at least goodbye for now. Not forever.
“I’m sorry. I told myself I wasn’t going to cry in front of you.”
“It’s okay. I don’t mind.” He put his arm around me and I leaned into him. “But I think I should go now. I can’t … I can’t deal with the waiting anymore.”
No! He couldn’t go yet. We still had time …
“It’s for the best, Marisol. You know it is.”
I swallowed the emotions that threatened to overtake me and nodded.
So this was how it ended. Naked. Raw.
“Let me know as soon as you land,” I said, wiping at my cheeks and trying to remember all the things I’d prepared to say. “And when you get checked in.”
“I will.” He brushed his thumb across my lips. “I want to kiss you.”
“Then kiss me.”
He shook his head. “It would be a goodbye kiss. Those always taste of bitterness. I want to savor last night. It was pure. That’s what I want to take with me.”
Briefly, I considered ambush-kissing him, but I didn’t. What he said made sense. If he kissed me now, I’d probably cry and cling to him, and it would make everything worse. No, ending it like this was better.
“Can I hug you at least?” I asked.
He nodded and put his other arm around me, tucking me into his chest.
“Are you sure you can’t escape?” One last-ditch effort. I clutched the key in my hand so hard it cut my skin.
“I’ll be back, Marisol.”
“I know.”
With one last squeeze, he released me and stood up. I watched as he dressed in the clothes he’d worn last night.
“Stay as long as you want. No rush.”
I nodded, not trusting my voice. I had to keep it together. At least until he left.
When he was dressed again, he turned to face me.
“See you soon.”
I watched him walk out of the room, listening as he walked through the apartment and then shut the front door.
Then I let myself fall apart.
Don’t forget to check out
Deep Surrendering
Episode 5
when it comes out on July 17th!
I owe a debt of gratitude to my editor for keeping up with me and my formatter for rocking this out at the last minute. Thanks also go to family, friends, awesome authors, bloggers and YOU for hanging out with Fin and Marisol. I’ve got more tricks up my sleeve. Just wait.
The Noctalis Chronicles
Nocturnal (Book One)
Nightmare (Book Two)
Neither (Book Three)
Neverend (Book Four)
The Whisper Trilogy
Whisper (Book One)
Fall and Rise
Deeper We Fall (Book One)
Faster We Burn (Book Two)
My Favorite Mistake
My Sweetest Escape
(Available from Harlequin)
Surrendering
Sweet Surrendering
Surrendering to Us
Dark Surrendering
For Real
UnWritten
Chelsea M. Cameron is a YA/NA New York Times/USA Today Best Selling author from Maine. Lover of things random and ridiculous, Jane Austen/Charlotte and Emily Bronte Fangirl, red velvet cake enthusiast, obsessive tea drinker, vegetarian, former cheerleader and world's worst video gamer. When not writing, she enjoys watching infomercials, singing in the car and tweeting. She has a degree in journalism from the University of Maine, Orono that she promptly abandoned to write about the people in her own head. More often than not, these people turn out to be just as weird as she is.
Find Chelsea online:
chelseamcameron.com
Twitter: @chel_c_cam
Facebook: Chelsea M. Cameron (Official Author Page)
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Acknowledgements
Books by Chelsea M. Cameron
About the Author
Deep Surrendering: Episode Four Page 7
