'Nick was a good friend,' said Maggie staunchly. 'I was so miserable I'd probably have thrown myself in the South China Sea if it hadn't been for him.'
'Were you, Maggie? Were you really miserable because I'd left? I didn't know that either. There was a hell of a lot I didn't know.'
Maggie waited, saying nothing.
'It's not a very pretty story,' Blake went on. 'I got back to my apartment in London late at night. I'd left Fiona there after our wedding—she said she had nowhere to go, so I gave her my keys and told her to use the place as her own.' He laughed bitterly. 'She took that literally. When I let myself in she was—entertaining a man in my bedroom. In point of fact, in my bed. They were having a high old time—they never even realised that I'd come in and seen them. So—' in the moonlight she saw his mouth twist '—I went out again and left them to it. The next morning I saw J.M. at the office and we had a heart-to-heart. I thought the time had come to make a clean breast of it, and I did.' He leaned back and looked up at the ceiling in silence for a while. Then he went on, 'He was surprisingly understanding, on the whole. I think we came closer together in that interview than we've ever been since I was a kid.'
'He's devoted to you, Blake,' Maggie said softly. 'And very proud of you. He's told me so.'
'He told you something else, too, didn't he?' Blake said unexpectedly.
'What do you mean?'
'He told you about Fiona being mixed up in some scandal in Hong Kong, and that if I had married her I should have been turned down for this job I'm doing out there.'
'Yes, he told me that,' Maggie said.
'And that explained why you turned up at the church that day, when I wasn't expecting you to. It was out of loyalty to the company and to J.M. and —' he added wryly '—perhaps you had some idea of saving me from making a bloody fool of myself, had you?'
Maggie shook her head. 'No, Blake, that didn't enter my mind, honestly. There was—quite a different reason.'
'Such as—?' But she went on shaking her head and wouldn't tell him.
Instead she said, 'You're not going to tell me you suddenly found you were in love with me, after your talk with J.M., are you?'
He laughed hollowly. 'Not suddenly. It grew on me slowly, like a glorious sunrise. I found myself missing you like hell all the time. Missing the way we could talk together, laugh together, missing always knowing you were there. I think I must have loved you all these years, my darling, without really knowing it. Do you believe me?' He held out a hand across the bed and Maggie put her own into it and was drawn close to him again.
'I couldn't wait to get back to you, to try and explain, and make it up to you for the way I'd treated you. And I found myself wanting you. Maggie, wanting to hold you in my arms, all the sweetness and the saneness of you. My God, I'd come to my senses all right! Then, the next day, I got that call from Denby, in Hong Kong, retailing the gossip about what was going on between you and Nick Grant, and I think I was out of my mind for a time. I'd never known what jealousy was before, but by God, I knew then. When I got back and sat in our room waiting for you and then you walked in with Nick, that night, I think all the devils in hell got hold of me. I thought I'd lost you, and it was all my own damned fault.'
There was a long silence. He held her gently and stroked her hair. 'Even now I can hardly believe you've forgiven me. You have, haven't you?' he added anxiously.
'Go on,' she said.
'Well, after that I tried to go slowly, to get back on our old terms, and I think it was partly successful. We seemed to be friends again. I didn't dare hurry you, or tell you how I felt.'
She said slowly, 'I knew you'd been out all night, for several nights running. And then I saw you with Fiona, the night of Ling San's party, and I thought—well, it seemed obvious—'
'So you upped and went.' He held her a little closer as if to make sure that she wasn't going to get away again.
She said, 'I had to—because I knew by then about the baby. I thought—' she bit her lip '—I thought you might want me to get rid of it.'
He groaned. 'Oh lord, was I really such a swine to you that you could believe that?' He cradled her in his arms as if he could somehow undo all the harm he had done. 'But you really did get all the wrong ideas, my darling. I hadn't the faintest idea that Fiona was coming out to Hong Kong, needless to say. Apparently the man she had in London had disappeared and she thought she'd have another try at getting me. She borrowed some money from one of her late husband's racing friends to pay for her flight and when she was there she contacted one of the men she knew before. Stupid, of course, but she had implicit faith in her own attractions and she thought she could get him to pay her hotel bills while she came to some arrangement with me. Unfortunately, the man was just on the verge of being picked up by the I.C.A.C. That's the Independent Commission Against Corruption, if you don't know. Fiona was with him at the time and she was picked up too. She panicked and gave them my name and they contacted me. I had to do what I could to get the idiotic girl off the hook. The night of Ling San's party was the time she was to be interrogated and I promised to go along with her. That was when you saw us together, Maggie.'
'I see,' Maggie said slowly. 'And did you? Get her off the hook, I mean?'
'Yes, fortunately, after a long hassle, they believed what I told them, that she'd come out to visit me and knew nothing of her pal's undercover activities. I gave her her fare back home and told her to keep out of my life in future, or else—'
There was a long silence when he finished speaking. They lay together, their arms round each other, her head pressed against his shoulder. 'So you weren't with her on those nights?'
Blake gave a hollow laugh. 'I was in the office working,' he said. 'Or rather, trying to work. It was getting more and more impossible to sleep on that damned sofa with you on the other side of the door. It was driving me crackers, but I didn't dare rush you. I was afraid I'd killed any affection you might have had for me. You were cool and friendly, but I wanted so much more. So very much more,' he groaned, his hands moving under the folds of her flimsy gown to find the soft, warm flesh beneath. He bent his head and his mouth found hers in a long, clinging kiss.
'See what you've done to me by making me wake up and talk?' he muttered.
She pressed closer to him, her need rising to meet his, and his mouth trailed over her shoulders and found the hollow between her breasts. 'Oh, Maggie, my little darling, I love you so,' he murmured. 'I don't deserve you, but thank God your loyalty to the company made you turn up at the church that day.'
Her mouth twitched softly against his hair. 'It wasn't as simple as that,' she whispered.
He lifted his head to stare into her face in the moonlight. 'Why, then?'
'Because I loved you,' she admitted. 'I've always loved you.' She drew him closer as she whispered on a choky little laugh, 'How could I let you go?'
Makeshift Marriage Page 17
