by Xavier Neal
My girlfriend shakes her head profusely. “God, no. Aside from the fact I have never been somewhere there was one, all of this,” she points to her curvy body I love caressing, “is not something anyone wants to see in that much motion.”
She does this. Often. Her hatred for her figure only feeds the ferocious feelings I have about consuming her. Once she’s under me and over me, she’ll be worshipped and understand why all of her backhanded remarks were wrong.
“I disagree,” my tone light and playful. “I wanna see all of that in as much motion as possible all the time.”
Abby gives me an elbow to the side. “You. Hush.”
Sienna giggles seconds before she states, “Personally, I think you look great! I like to think of women like cheesecake. Some are thin slices, some are thick ones, and some are the whole damn cake. All are delicious and there is a perfect size for every customer’s preference.”
My girlfriend can’t resist fighting the explanation, “And what about those who don’t like cheesecake?”
“Fuck ‘em.”
Her crass response receives laughter from all of us.
Eddie shakes his head with a large grin. “Gotta love her.”
“Anyway,” his wife pushes back to the topic, “you should try it! If not for any other reason than to say you did something crazy.”
Abby’s lips purse together in actual contemplation.
Just as my hopes begin to soar, an unwanted voice chimes in, “I thought I saw the Shaw men over here.”
The woman slides to the side of the table to be in view of everyone.
Should’ve known there would be some sort of wrench thrown into the situation.
“Hey,” I do my best to kindly greet. “How are you?”
She ruffles her brown hair and pulls it to one side of her petite face. “I’m good. Much better now that I’ve seen you.”
There’s an unmistakable huff of irritation next to me. I fight the temptation to smile over her jealousy. It means she finds me worth being possessive over. The feeling is beyond mutual. I thought I was going to have to bash some random dick’s brains in while we were grabbing breakfast together last week. I had slipped away to answer a call for work and when I returned not only was he too close for my liking, Abby was cringing at his compliments. One look at me and he bolted. It was for the best. That level of anger was new for me. Can’t say I enjoyed it, but can say the make out session reward was worth it.
The woman turns her attention to my brother and his wife. “Hey, you two. Long time no see.”
“Never long enough,” Sienna mumbles louder than I’m sure she anticipated.
Thank you beer number four.
I lean back in my seat and introduce, “Abby this is Chastity.”
“That can’t be your real name.”
Her lack of filter I love kicks up the corner of my lips.
“It is,” she snips. “And…you are?”
“Wondering how sad your parents are you missed their high expectations of the name they gave you.”
The squeak out of Chastity is comical as is the cycle of amusement on my family’s faces.
I clear my throat of my own desire to make the situation worse. “Chastity this is my girlfriend, Abby.”
Her stance noticeably changes along with her tone. “Girlfriend?”
“Yeah.”
“Thought you didn’t do girlfriends.” She folds her arms across her chest. “Thought you only liked your fun for one night.”
Seeing her brown eyes feel with sadness stings more than I figured it ever would.
Words I not only spoke but swore by before Abby. I never entertained the idea that any of the women I slept with actually hated hearing them or wanted more from me. Especially not her. We’d been falling into each other’s beds periodically for years. Not once, did she ever ask or imply she needed more. I would’ve stopped it otherwise. I’m not an asshole.
“Were you just um…here for a few?” Eddie tries to wade through the thickness. “You here on a date or waitin’ to meet one?”
She pulls her eyes away from me to him. “Just a few girlfriends. Came out to blow off some steam.”
“You know a great way to do that is to ride the bull,” Sienna suggest swiftly. “Over there. Way over there. As in way way over there away from this table.”
“Oh, I plan on it.” Chastity presents me with a smirk. “Damn good at ridin’. You remember, don’t you Blake?”
I drop my mouth to retort when she cuts me off.
“Make sure you’re watchin’. Just in case you’ve forgotten.”
There isn’t time to comment before she spins on her heels and struts off the way she came.
“Is it wrong to hope the machine malfunctions and sends her and her fake tits flyin’ across the room?”
We collectively chuckle at her comment at the same time my eyes move back to Abby who has placed an all too familiar steel wall around herself.
I give my brother and Sienna a slight head nod, which prompts Sienna to announce, “Come on, Eddie. I wanna go dance before the bull wears me out.”
He stands up with her. “You sure that’s a good idea? You’re four beers in. This is about the time you step on my feet.”
There’s a muffled exchange as she drags him away leaving the two of us alone.
The moment I turn to face Abby again, she bites, “Is this your watering hole for whores?”
“I-”
“How many women in this room have you slept with, Blake?”
My lips press together to prevent from making the situation worse.
“Answer me.”
“No.”
The response seems to infuriate her more. “What the hell do you mean no?!”
“No.”
“Are you telling me no because you don’t want to answer or are you telling me no because you can’t answer? Because your dick has more rides than that stupid bull you seem to love seeing women on?”
I give the side of my face a good scrub.
Should’ve known this conversation would get here eventually. Other than the one we had on our first date, we don’t spend much time on the topic of past lovers. Not only because she has none, but because why would we? I don’t date. Neither does she. There’s no reason to talk about preferences in bed when you’re not going there yet.
“Blake.”
“I won’t answer you because it doesn’t fucking matter.”
“How does it not fucking matter!?”
“Because they’re not my goddamn girlfriend, Abby, you are!”
Her hands fold tightly together in her lap.
“How many women I’ve been with in the past doesn’t matter. I’m not keepin’ score. I’m not lookin’ for repeats.”
“Shakespearian.”
“I’m not interested in rememberin’ anything about them. You are the only one I give a shit about in or out of bed.”
She lets her stiff shoulders finally drop.
“Look, Angel, if I wanted Chastity, which I don’t, I would be with her. Same story for any other woman I’ve slept with. Don’t let yourself get caught up in high school bullshit kinda games. That’s exactly what she wants, so it’ll put a wedge between us.” I slide my hand over to place it on top of hers. “I don’t know about you, but that’s the last thing I want.”
Abby’s fingers separate from each other to tighten with mine. There’s a small beat proceeded with a quiet confession. “She makes me feel inadequate.”
“Because you haven’t given any rides?”
My attempt to lighten the moment by maintaining the metaphor backfires.
“Is this all just a joke to you?”
“No. Of course not. I-”
“Because it’s not funny to me, Blake. I’m not embarrassed to be a virgin, but I damn well don’t appreciate being taunted over it.”
Rather than dig myself into a deeper hole, I lift a hand in surrender. “I was simply tryin’ to understand why you would feel ina
dequate to a woman like her. Is it because she’s had more sex than you or jus’ because she’s had sex with me?”
“It’s the latter along with the uncomfortable reminder, I will never look as good naked as she does.”
The comment shifts my eyebrows upward. “What?”
“She’s just like Sienna. Thin. And fit. And,” her free hand makes a bizarre hand motion to fill in the rest of the sentence. “I’m never going to look like that. Or be like that.”
“Why does that have to be a bad thing, Angel?” Before she can reply, I sigh, “I’ve already had that. I already know what that’s like. I’ve never had a woman like you, and I’ve never been happier in my life. Give up feelin’ like you have to measure up to anything other than yourself.”
Abby’s expression finally softens.
“What do you think about us getting’ out of here? We can go back to your place and fight over something to watch. You really like watchin’ Friends.”
“That episode where she says Tony Danza instead of Tiny Dancer…”
I smile brightly. “Exactly. Why don’t we go back to your place, make some popcorn, and-”
“No.”
Surprise showers over me. “No?”
“No.”
“No…”
Her head lifts a little taller and she declares. “You’re right.”
The unicorn of phrases.
“It only matters how I feel about myself.”
“Exactly.”
“And I feel like… I should spend more time around people and laugh more. I should hang out with people like Sienna and Ollie and Dana. I should keep finding things I like to do outside of my house. And I absolutely should do more crazy things. Starting with riding that giant death trap machine.”
I laugh loudly at her choice of words. “Angel, you don’t-”
“I know,” she cuts me off, “but I want to. At the very least, it’ll be a good story to tell someday and we know, I don’t have many of those.” A sweet smile graces her lips. “Though with you around, I finally have more.”
With a gentle tug, her face falls towards mine for our lips to lock. As soon as they do, she parts hers to mesh our tongues together. They briefly roll around before I have to pull away; knowing what happens if we keep this up for too long.
Abby immediately declares, “Let’s go get your brother and Sienna, so she can teach me how to ride the damn thing.”
Once we’ve summoned them away from where they’re making out on the dance floor, the four of us head for the bull riding area where a small crowd is gathered. The section with the machine is blocked off by a thin brown fence while the red floor surrounding the bull is inflated like a blow-up mattress for the inevitable bucking off.
Once Abby has gained the courage and Sienna has taken a turn to demonstrate it isn’t nearly as dangerous as it seems, she hauls herself up onto the bull.
The grimace on her face tugs harshly at my heart.
This isn’t what I wanted. She looks…terrified.
I start to make a motion to stop her when Eddie drapes an arm around my shoulder. “Relax, Blake. Give her a minute. She’ll be smilin’ again in no time.”
My mouth moves to object when the machine slowly begins. Immediately, she squeals and hangs on for dear life despite the fact it’s barely moving. I motion again to stop her, but my brother tightens his grip. It takes a few more moments of the gentle bucking, but eventually my paranoia is pummeled. She starts to smile, and I can feel myself breathe again.
“You’re way in over your head,” he teases while I continue watching her.
“Yeah,” my voice barely replies, “tell me about it.”
Sienna claps gleefully as she continues to coach from her position beside us. She shouts encouragement without care about the other onlookers and snaps a few pictures I know she’ll send to me to let me post. As much shit as she gives me about constantly posting, she’s not much better. The big difference is most of the photos also contain my nephews.
Abby throws one hand in the air and grants her body permission to find sync with the rocking machine. Eddie frees me from his clutches and I rest my arms on the edge of the fence, eyes plastered on the fluidity of her hip movements. Her tits slightly begin to bounce and all of sudden I’m envisioning her on top of me. Dark hair swaying. Body bucking. Parted lips crying out my name.
Ah, hell. This was a terrible idea.
I try to nonchalantly adjust my cock yet Eddie leans down beside me to chuckle at my expense. “She’s punishing you. You know that, right?”
My girlfriend gives me a wink and my dick thumps against my jeans in immediate agreement.
“Yup…”
He laughs again, this time louder as the song fades into the next one. “Welcome to love, big head. It’s never an easy ride…”
Might be a bit easier if she were on my lap instead of that damn bull. Wait. Love? Is it? No…Maybe? No. Just because we’re having a good time without sex, doesn’t mean I’ve fallen in love with her. Sure, yeah, my days are always better with her in them and yeah, she brings me happiness I never knew I was missing, but love?
Abby giggles and tosses both hands in the air the second the machine stops.
The three of us clap for what would be a small victory for most, but what I know is monumental. Pride pumps through my veins rapidly and I grin wider when our eyes meet.
Yeah. He’s right. This is love. Just hope that’s not a bad thing…
We stroll in through Abby’s front door, a little before midnight.
“You sure you want me to stay, Angel?” I volunteer an exit from my position beside the door. “I don’t mind driving back to my place.”
She spins on her heels once she’s kicked her shoes off. “This isn’t the first time you’ve slept over.”
It’s not. Hell, I’ve ended up falling asleep with her in my arms so many times I started keeping a gym bag packed in my truck with workout clothes and something decent to wear to the office. But this time is different. This time I’m not sure I can keep the saint routine she’s accustomed to.
“No, but…” My voice hesitates to continue.
“But what?”
“Not sure it would be a good idea.”
“Why?” The less than innocent tone causes my cock to stir.
Because she’s fucking sexy. Because her playful nature is much sexier than her sassy one. Because I spent the majority of the truck ride here thinking of the least sexy shit I could to stop from pulling over to the side of the road to take her in the bed of my truck.
All of a sudden, Abby pulls off her t-shirt in a flawless execution. Her gorgeous full tits are practically spilling out of the red lacy bra I already know matches her underwear.
Fuck this is a nightmare masquerading as a daydream. A delicious, dark, succulent nightmare I will be replaying in my mind again and again, except there I’ll actually get to touch her rather than stare aimlessly.
“Don’t you wanna claim your prize from our bet?”
My dick swells to the point of pain. “Angel-”
“Don’t you wanna see what’s under these jeans?” Her fingers begin toying with the button to her pants. “Aren’t you curious to see if my panties match?”
I drop a hand to my crotch in an attempt to alleviate the discomfort. “Yeah and that’s…that’s…exactly why I should head home.”
Her actions cease. “I don’t understand.”
Relieved her hands are momentarily no longer in motion, I sigh, “Angel, I can’t promise to keep my hands to myself and I’d rather spend the night nursing blue balls than cross a line you’re not ready to.”
She offers me an unsuspected heated look. “How about you don’t keep your hands to yourself?”
Silently, I watch Abby reach behind her back to undo the clasp to her bra. The moment her dark, hardened nipples are revealed my mouth instantly waters in desperation.
“How about you come touch me like no one else has?”
Lo
gic battles with instinct.
This is probably just a little bit of jealousy still lingering over Chastity and her bullshit. I shouldn’t take advantage of the situation. I should shut my eyes, turn around, and just go.
With everything in me, I grind out, “Angel, we don’t….we don’t have to do this tonight.”
