She squeezed her legs together, curling them under her as she half sat up; to be seen this way made her feel at a disadvantage. While he’d seen her through the whole of their lovemaking, she hadn’t once seen him. She was too shy to turn around and face him, too mortified to look him in the eye after what they’d just done.
Should she leave the bed and dress? She wasn’t sure she had the strength to even move, let alone walk.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Nick drew Amelia’s attention back to him with a kiss to her shoulder. The feather-light press of his lips had her eyes closing and her body swaying closer to his.
She crossed her hands over her breasts. They were sore and tender from his attention. When she turned to look at him, his face was a few inches away.
“What has you so skittish?” he asked.
“You,” she whispered.
He placed his hands around her waist. She thought it was to keep her from fleeing, but she had no intention of running from what they’d just done.
“Are you hurt?” he asked.
She shook her head, but he was inspecting her body to make sure she was all right, and that melted her heart a little.
“No,” she said. Mostly, she was starting to feel sore in places she had never felt anything prior to their joining.
“Then why do you keep averting your eyes?” he asked. The tone in his voice made her think she was hurting him by pulling back, so she met his gaze and held it.
“What am I meant to do?”
His hand cupped the side of her face, and he gave her a tender kiss on the mouth before answering her. “Exactly what you are doing.”
“Is it always like that?”
He pulled her into his lap and held her. Parts of him poked at her, and it took everything in her not to look down and take in the sight of him. “It only hurts the first time. I won’t hurt you again.”
“I mean the other thing.” God, her cheeks were flaming. “The parts that felt good.”
He gave her a mischievous smile. “We need to get you in a warm bath before the pain really settles in.”
Lifting her from his lap, he stood from the bed, his penis still hard. Her eyes were glued to that part of him. The sight of him naked was primal and breathtaking. His body was muscled everywhere, his stomach a series bumps and dents that moved like a rippling machine as he pulled his trousers over his strong legs. It was a shame he had to cover himself at all; she wanted to study him for hours.
Trousers donned, he snatched up her robe from the chair near her window and handed it to her. “You can wear this to my room.” She realized she had to release her breasts and show herself to him if she took the wrap, so she stayed where she was until Nick leaned over the bed and kissed her full on the mouth. “Neither of us will be wearing clothes for the rest of the night, so your modesty is for a lost cause.”
She took the robe and tied it around her waist as he pulled his shirt over his head and covered the dark hair speckled across his chest. She wanted to run her fingers over every part of his body.
Not bothering with the ties, the front gaped open and gave him a clear view of her breasts. He held out his hand, which she didn’t hesitate to take.
Once her feet were on the floor, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her across the room. “What if someone sees us?” she asked, genuinely worried they might be caught.
“It is late enough that everyone will be in bed.”
“Does Huxley ever sleep?”
Nick chuckled at that. “He’s not here and will not be back for a few days.”
She bit her bottom lip. Was she looking for an excuse to end their evening?
Nick opened the door, and after a cursory look down the hallway, he walked with purpose toward his bedchamber doors, which felt so much farther than it actually was.
“What we did . . . what does this mean for us going forward?”
“I was serious when I said you were mine. I will not let you go, Amelia.”
“Why me?”
He looked her in the eye as he put her down on the edge of his high bed. His room was dark, except for the small fire burning in the fireplace in the sitting area at his back, so it was difficult to make out his expression.
“Why not you?” he returned.
He left her with those words as he went into the plunge bath, which was just off his bedroom. A light flickered on in that room, and she could hear the water being turned on.
Why would he choose her over a woman like Victoria, who was refined, beautiful, and already a part of his world? She hugged her arms around herself, pulling the robe tight around her body like a blanket. No, more like a shield.
Could she brave baring herself to him again? She was still coming down from the high of being in his arms. And while she knew she needed to distance herself from him, a larger part of her wanted the exact opposite. But how much could she insert herself in his life before she crossed a line between personal and professional? Hadn’t she already crossed that line? She nearly snorted at that but was distracted from giving it further thought when Nick came back into the room, shirtless.
She hadn’t been free to explore him when they’d been in her room. She hadn’t seen any of him and wouldn’t give up the opportunity, now that he was standing in front of her, and she had more light to see him.
The hair speckling his chest was as black as his beard; it covered his pectorals and trailed down his torso before stopping at his stomach. The trail picked up again beneath his belly button in a V-shape that disappeared in the band of his trousers.
The muscled lines on his stomach spoke of vigorous exercise. She had lived in the country all her life. Men took their shirts off on a hot summer day when they were working in the fields, but they had nothing on Nick Riley. He was sculpted like a Greek statue, every line of muscle defined, right down to his narrow hips. His arms were roped with sinew too, and her mouth dropped open with an appreciative sigh.
Her gaze trailed back to his eyes, and she saw a measure of pride in those stormy depths of his. “If you look at the rest of me that way, I won’t be able to keep my hands off you much longer, Amelia.”
Her breathing grew erratic again. She closed her eyes as he approached her. When the shush of his feet crossing the floor stopped, and she felt the heat radiating from his body and reaching out toward her, she put her hand out. Her fingers pressed into his chest as he leaned closer.
“I want to kiss every inch of your porcelain skin.” His hands reached for the tie around her waist. Jerking the sash loose, the garment glided off her shoulders and caught in the bend of her arms. Hastily, she slipped free of the material, desperate to touch him again. Desperate to feel their bodies smashed together without any clothes.
She was no longer afraid of her nudity and hoped this newfound bravery didn’t abandon her any time soon.
Trailing her hand over his chest, she traced along the line that cut cleanly down the center of him before fanning out her fingers through the spatter of hair on his chest.
“What happens tomorrow?” she asked, hating that she needed to know. “Do I become your mistress? Or do we pretend none of this happened?”
“I promise you, this happened. And I will not let you forget it. You are a free woman, to decide as you please, Amelia. I will never cage you like a songbird. But make no mistake; you are still mine.”
“And what of the rest of the household?” She couldn’t help but worry what they would think of her. She’d only just been hired, and now she was intimate with her employer. They could never know what transpired between her and Nick.
“They have nothing to do with us.”
“They cannot know,” she whispered.
“I agree that secrecy is probably for the better. For the time being anyway.” He kissed her shoulder before standing again. “Come,” he said giving her his hand yet giving her the choice to go with him. “Your bath awaits.”
She didn’t hesitate to go with him and stood unashamed a
nd feeling braver by the moment, though she didn’t expect that bravery to last past tonight.
The bathing room was quite grand and tiled in beige marble on the floors and halfway up the walls. The tub was bigger than any she’d ever seen, and its decorative brass-clawed feet rested in the middle of the large room. There was a dressing table and sink on one wall and a toilet on the other, all encased in blond wood. She’d never seen a full bath in any house, and the luxury of it had her speechless. Water still filled the bath, and Nick reached down to turn the taps off when it was three-quarters full.
Taking her hand once again, he helped her into the water, which was hot but not so hot that it would burn her, just enough to soothe her.
Nick stayed outside the water, his trousers still in place and sitting low on his hips. Though she could see the bulge of his penis straining against the material, he didn’t seem to find any discomfort.
He reached down to gather a large sea sponge in his hand and soaked it with water. When he sat on the rim of the tub and squeezed the water over her thighs, she was mortified to see streaks of blood. She reached for the sponge and started to sink into the water in an attempt to hide herself, but the water was crystal clear.
“You have nothing for which you should be ashamed, Amelia. I should have been gentler.” Now that she was sitting in the water, he squeezed streams of water over her breasts, making her nipples peak. There were a few abrasions and scuff marks from his beard blotted across her pale skin. Nick thumbed the scratches he’d left on her body. “I like seeing my marks on you.”
She liked it too but couldn’t admit as much. What was wrong with her to want a stamp of ownership marking her skin? It was so she wouldn’t forget tonight when morning finally arrived. So she would know this had actually happened and hadn’t been a dream.
“The water is more soothing than I thought it would be,” she said, drawing his eyes back to hers. His gaze was pure hunger. She swallowed, not sure what to say, not sure what to do. She took the sponge from him and let it fall into the water.
“I have changed my mind,” he said, standing suddenly to undo his trousers so he could pull them down his legs. The sight that greeted her caused her breath to catch in her throat, and her heart paused for a full second in her chest.
When he tossed his trousers aside and stood proudly before her, she took the opportunity to study his form. She’d never seen a man naked before tonight. Never seen that part of a man’s body in any state or form, though she imagined men didn’t walk around with a bulging piece of flesh day in and day out; she would have noticed it. In fact, it was as thick as her wrist, and she wasn’t at all surprised that it had hurt so much when he’d entered her. The tip of it was a deep plum, and the heavy column was closer to his tanned skin tone. The hair at the base was clipped short and was the same color as the trail of hair snaking down the center of his abdomen.
Noticing where her attention was focused, Nick’s hand curled around the base of his penis. “This is what you do to me, Amelia. Do you know how many times I have thought of tossing you on my desk, throwing your skirts over your head, and fucking you senseless whenever we are alone?” His words were crass and raw, and they made her sheath throb to have him inside her again. That was a new sensation for her, for she’d never felt it before tonight.
“And now?” she dared to ask.
The faintest of smiles tilted his lips. To her surprise, he stepped into the water with her, his feet between her legs. She scooted back in the water to give him more room until she was stopped by the curved backrest. Nick’s hands curled around the edge of the bathing tub, and he leaned in close to her face, as though he planned to kiss her.
“Right now, all I can think of doing is having you wrap your legs around my hips so I can bury my cock deep inside you.”
With his words, her knees spread wider, stopped only by the width of the tub. If that wasn’t an invitation, she didn’t know what was. Nick moved closer, the head of his penis brushing the curls of her sex. His arms surrounded her as he leaned over her.
“What if I also want that?” It was a challenge and a dare. Even though she felt a tinge of soreness in her nether region, she wanted this too badly to say no.
Hands holding tightly to the edge of the tub, she dared herself to be bold, to take what she wanted just once. Just this once. Curling one leg around his hip, she dug her heel into his backside to pull him into the V of her thighs. Still, he held back enough that he didn’t enter her, his penis teasing her and just out of reach from its ultimate goal.
“I want to feel you inside me again. I want you to make me feel what I felt before.” Amelia nibbled on her lower lip. “Before . . . when you were inside me, I never wanted it to end.”
Her admission must have driven Nick over the edge, for he roughly grabbed her buttocks so he could tilt her pelvis toward him, and he slid inside her. He didn’t slam deep and hard as he had the first time. This time he was slow, letting her get used to the welcome intrusion and adjusting to the size of him. He groaned when he was fully seated. Amelia wrapped both her legs around his hips, her hands on the edge of the tub the only thing keeping her afloat in the water.
Nick’s mouth was harsh and brutal as it smashed against hers in a drugging, all-consuming kiss. His teeth scraped against her lips, and he sucked at her tongue so violently that their teeth clanked with every thrust of his tongue into her mouth.
Being with Nick this way felt . . . right.
She knew if she asked to stop at any point, Nick would have respected that decision. But she wanted to be reckless, carefree. She wanted to be the type of woman who had the world at her fingertips. As did the other women who had been at dinner tonight. But she was only playing part of that role now, indulging in intimacy she’d never before experienced. Lavishing in every new sensation Nick let her feel.
Her focus turned solely to Nick as his mouth landed on hers again, gentler this time. His knees found purchase between her legs, while his hands curled over the rim of the tub and offered support for her head as he slid in and out of her at a much slower pace. Being in the water, her breasts floated on the surface in their position, the wetness all around them lapping at her nipples like hundreds of tongues. Nick periodically dipped his head to suck one of her hard nipples into his mouth, eliciting moan after moan from her. Every time he did that, she felt her sheath tighten around his cock in exquisite pleasure.
She couldn’t say how long their bodies moved together, but the water cooled enough that goose bumps rose along her arms and legs. Nick gently bit her shoulder and must have noticed that her skin was chilled.
He lifted them both from the tub, sloshing water around them and on the floor as he stepped onto the marble tiles. He remained buried deep inside her. Arms wrapped tight around his shoulders and ankles locked behind his back, she looked into his eyes and found herself breathless by the possessive determination in his gaze. It was a look that matched his earlier declaration; it said she belonged to him.
When she looked at the image they made in the mirror behind them, she could see a puzzle of scars crisscrossing Nick’s back. She lowered one of her hands to touch the raised welts. She didn’t know what to say when she looked back into his eyes, questions surely clear all over her face.
“Another time,” he said.
“It hurts me to see that,” she admitted out loud. And it had a thousand questions burning in her mind as to how such a thing had happened.
“Then I will try to clear it from your memory.”
When he looked at her, the stamp of possession was clear—he owned her body and intended to show her that throughout the night. And she could admit he owned a little piece of her soul, but perhaps that was because she’d chosen him above everyone else. Others had tried to take what she wasn’t willing to give, and she’d resisted and fought back, but when she looked at Nick, she wanted to give him everything she had to offer.
She hated that her lies stood between them. It was in that moment
she knew she had to tell him the truth about who she was, and what exactly she was running from. But not tonight. She couldn’t bear to bring any ugliness between them when everything was so perfect right now.
She kissed him full on the mouth as he carried her into the next room, her arms anchored around his neck again, though she couldn’t get the image of those scars out of her mind.
There was no harshness as their mouths came together; it was a gentle tasting, as if she was familiarizing herself with him, and he was doing the same. It let her see a softer side of him, though she thought he was only being careful because she was still tender from their first lovemaking.
To her surprise, he didn’t take her over to his bed but to the hearth flanked with an oversized chair on one side and a burgundy chaise on the other. There was a fire burning low and emitting enough heat that the droplets of water left on her skin soon began to evaporate.
Nick leaned over the chaise, pressing her back into the velvety soft material. Kneeling between her legs, he guided her knees toward her chest and seated himself deeper inside her. Her eyes fell shut, and her head tilted back, giving him access to her throat, which he rubbed his beard along. Though the position stretched her body oddly and gave her no control, it felt good to be trapped beneath this man, to give him complete power over her body—to do as he pleased with her, while she was at his mercy.
She wanted to touch every part of him, explore the scars on his back, and try to understand what that might have been like for him, but he anchored her wrists together above her head with his unmovable grip.
Then his body worked hard inside her, pushing deep, only to pull out and slam back into her. What was left from the water on their skin grew sticky and damp between them as Nick stretched her body to its limits of pleasure and pain. She was helpless to move beneath him and could only accept what he doled out. She didn’t ask him to slow down his punishing pace; she begged him to give her release. Begged him to never stop. She couldn’t say how long they moved in unison, but their bodies were covered in sweat again when he finally emptied himself inside her. After retrieving a wet towel from the bathing chamber, he wiped away the evidence of their lovemaking and carried her over to his bed.
Desire Me Now Page 15
