by Anna Antonia
He smiled. “And you’re as beautiful as always.”
Victoria didn’t mistake the tightness of his smile. He seemed distracted, nothing like he usually was when with her. She clenched and unclenched her fists with nervous rhythm.
Things had changed.
Adrian offered her a light breakfast but she passed. Victoria didn’t want to watch him break away from her completely. If one night was all they really had, then she wanted to remember that night and not the morning.
“Thanks for the offer, Adrian. I really need to get home if I’m going to have enough time to change before going to class. So…”
He stood there with an impassive expression as she explained. Victoria found her voice trailing off softly the longer he stared at her. After a night of passion, to see Adrian be so self-contained was like a dunk in cold water.
Unpleasant and bordering on pain.
“I see.” Adrian pulled out his phone and then ordered the person on the other end to “Be here in ten minutes.” Once he disconnected the call he said, “I’ve called for a driver. He can take you wherever you wish to go.”
“Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it. Please have a seat wherever you’d like.”
Victoria thought the phrasing odd. It only made her feel even less comfortable. “I can sit here,” she said while gesturing at the breakfast bar. “If you don’t mind.”
“Of course not.” He then moved about the kitchen before sitting down next to her and eating a meager meal of toast and fruit. His attention remained firmly on his phone. Victoria’s stomach tied itself into knots the longer the minutes ticked by.
It was as if she was already gone.
When she couldn’t bear the silence one second longer Victoria turned to him. “You can go if you want. I can wait here until the driver comes.”
It was only after she said the words that she realized the fallacy of her suggestion. She was a stranger in his home. How could he trust a stranger having free rein with his personal possessions?
Undoubtedly Adrian thought the same but was too polite to give voice to it. “No need, Victoria. It will be my pleasure to see you out.”
The words didn’t make her feel the least bit better. Victoria itched with the need to leave, to not continue to feel like an intruder in Adrian’s life. After the intimacies they had shared, it stung to think of herself as an intruder.
She couldn’t be angry with him because he never made her any promises come morning. She had made the decision to be here last night and now that it was over, it was increasingly obvious Adrian had already moved on.
Victoria blinked back an embarrassing rush of tears. She may not be angry with him, but it didn’t mean she wasn’t hurt.
As she lay by his side and watched him sleep, Victoria couldn’t deny the dreams she’d built with every draw of his breath. She wanted to see him tomorrow, and the day after that, and the month after that.
Victoria let herself imagine that maybe all her waiting throughout the years, all her lonely nights, all the dates she didn’t take, was for this man. And now…right now she learned the hard lesson that dreams were meant for the night.
Right now there could be no hiding the changes taking place between them. The magic binding them in the night disintegrated in the cold light of day. Just as she should’ve already known if she’d let herself really think about it.
Minutes ago she’d taken pleasure in seeing him dressed for his day. Now the difference in their clothing was more salt on the wound. Victoria’s clothes had made her feel like a princess the night before. Now they simply made her feel like a piece of the past that needed to be forgotten.
Adrian’s phone rang. He looked at it and then strode into the living room. Victoria debated on whether she should take the opportunity to leave and make her way to the subway. Adrian’s politeness and her dignity didn’t have to take a beating this way. She could slip out in a few seconds. Victoria was halfway to the front door when Adrian joined her.
“Going somewhere?”
“Ah…well,” she stammered before giving him a tight nod.
He merely reached into the entry closet, pulled out her coat, and held it open for her. Victoria slipped her arms through and tried not to think about what happened the last time he was behind her like this.
Adrian put on his overcoat, black like his suit and dress shirt, and then escorted Victoria out of his home. The hand at the small of her back burned like a coal. She had a masochistic craving for that piece of coal masquerading as a brand on her flesh.
Their ride down to the underground garage passed in silence. Adrian deposited her by the sleek Mercedes.
“Mr. Jordan will take you wherever you need to go, Victoria.”
She summoned a polite smile to match his tone. “Thank you.”
Adrian opened his mouth and then abruptly closed it. Whatever he was going to say had softened his gaze just the tiniest bit. “I’ll call you.”
Victoria looked away. She didn’t have to have tons of dating experience to know those three words meant the exact opposite. It was probably a good thing that he wasn’t going to be crossing her path at work now that his late nights had come to an end.
There was nothing left to salvage the rest of her dignity. She may not regret having slept with Adrian and the ecstasy he’d given her time and time again, but she did regret how dirty this parting made her feel. Pain shot through her.
So this is what it feels like to be discarded.
Victoria’s gaze met his unflinchingly. “Goodbye, Adrian.”
***
Victoria got home, showered again, and then went through the rest of her day as if nothing momentous had happened in the last 24 hours. The only way she made it was by keeping her mind blank. One foot in front of the other. Only the present moment mattered.
When she made it home for the second time that day, Shaundra was the first person she saw. Victoria knew her coping technique was about to be tested big time.
Reclining on the couch, she gave Victoria a saucy wink. “How’d it go, baby? Everything you hoped it would be?”
Victoria forced a nonchalant shrug she didn’t feel in the slightest. “It was…fine.”
Shaundra sat up and cocked a skeptical brow. “Fine? Fine isn’t the first word of choice I’d use when rolling around in the sheets—if you know what I mean.”
Neither did Victoria. Sex with Adrian had been criminally exciting. A dream come true. Too bad the rest of it didn’t hold up.
“It was good and that’s all I’m going to say about it.”
Shaundra let out a mournful sigh. “You’re too shy, you know that?”
“I guess.”
“If you’re not going to give up deets on the goodies, tell me about what you did on your date. That should be PG enough. Where’d you go?”
Another jolt of pain shot through her. Reliving the beauty of last night would be so hard now that it was over. Victoria sat down on the other end of the couch. “Where’s Jenny and Krista?”
“At work and don’t change the subject.”
Seeing no other way out of it, Victoria briefly outlined her date with Adrian. She took care to keep her voice upbeat but it was hard going.
“He took you on a helicopter ride? Girl, he must’ve really wanted to get into those panties!”
Victoria fervently hoped she’d get to the point where she didn’t feel so raw about having what turned out to be a one-night stand. She’d love to be able to say something like “It was fun for a night and only for a night. Now I’m ready to see what else is out there.”
She was far from that.
“So when are you going to see Mr. Lover Man again?”
Never.
Victoria dreaded having to say it out loud. “I’m not sure. Actually, I don’t know.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know. I’m just not sure. That’s all.”
Shaundra considered her for a moment. Whatever she saw in Victori
a’s face made her say softly, “Understood. It happens, Vickie.”
The sympathy in her roommate’s voice brought a rush of embarrassing tears. She turned her attention to the television and pretended to watch the reality show rerun.
“All right, you’re crossing this…”
“Adrian.”
“Adrian off your list. Disconnect completely.”
I never connected at all. Not like I thought I did.
“If that’s what happens it’s not a problem. I won’t see him again at work. At least, I don’t think I will.”
“You only think?”
Victoria shrugged, gaze glued to the TV. “He never told me what he did. Just that he was only going to be working late nights until this week. I guess he’s some kind of manager or something.”
“Girl, do you even know who this man is?”
Victoria turned to see her incredulous expression. “Well, I’ve just gotten to know to him. I mean, we talked a lot and he never tried to do anything until last night. Even then he pulled back but I was the one…I was the one who…you know.”
Shaundra pursed her lips. “Have you Googled him yet?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“You know how I feel about prying into people’s lives via social media. It’s not my way.” Victoria would hate for someone to do it to her which was why she wasn’t on any of the sites.
Her roommate shook her head in disbelief. “Vickie, you have got to join the rest of us in the 21st century, okay? It’s a tool and tools are meant to be used.” Shaundra pulled out her phone. “What’s his name again? Adrian what?”
“Don’t do it. I don’t want to know.”
“Well, I do. Name?”
Victoria sighed. “Adrian Hawthorne.”
Shaundra’s thumbs quickly tapped across her screen. A minute later she looked up. “Victoria.”
Uh oh. She never calls me that.
Victoria squirmed in her seat, worried that Shaundra discovered something heinous.
Oh God, he’s not married, is he? Don’t tell me I gave my virginity to a married man? I never saw a ring! Ever!
“What?” Victoria dreaded hearing whatever awful thing Shaundra found out about Adrian.
“He took you on a helicopter ride last night and it took off from the building you clean. Right?”
“Yeah…”
Shaundra blew out a long breath. “He owns that building.”
Victoria’s current worldview collapsed. That couldn’t be right. “Come again?”
“He owns that building and a whole bunch of other stuff too. He’s a billionaire, Vickie. A real-life, under-the-age-of-ancient, gorgeous billionaire.”
Shaundra rattled off several stats but they went in one ear and right out the other. Victoria drew her legs up, trying to wrap her mind around the outrageous news.
“You scored big, Vickie. I mean, really, really big.”
Victoria broke out of her stupor. “I didn’t like him or go out with him because of his financial situation. I wasn’t trying to land anyone, Shaundra.”
“Well, you did.”
Victoria just couldn’t process this stunning bit of information. Not now. “I’m running late.” She shot up to her feet. “I have to get ready for work.”
Shaundra raised her brow. “Don’t shoot the messenger.”
“I’m not! I’m just…I don’t know.” Victoria stalked to her room. She stopped and turned back. “Is he married or engaged?”
Her roommate didn’t bat an eye. “100% single.” She scrolled through her phone. “He has dated a lot of famous women though—”
“Stop.” Victoria raised her hand. “I don’t want to know.”
Shaundra put her phone down. “I don’t blame you.”
Victoria took a quick shower, but she couldn’t run away from her thoughts. Every brush against her skin reminded her of Adrian. Of how he kissed her collar bones, her breasts, her belly, and lower. Her body didn’t feel her own anymore. The tenderness between her thighs made her want him even more.
What she didn’t want was the feeling that all this couldn’t possibly mean the same to him as it did her.
Why was a billionaire wasting time with the cleaning lady? Even if she worked ten lifetimes as a senior CPA, Victoria wouldn’t come close to touching his personal wealth.
So why her?
The question haunted Victoria all the way to work. And even though it was busy and Victoria practically ran her feet off, she couldn’t outrun the fear that Adrian was only playing with her feelings.
What if it was all a game to him? What if last night meant nothing to him because he did it all the time?
Victoria had to remind herself that Adrian never pledged his heart to her. He never lied to get her into bed with him. It was her decision to have sex with him. He never promised her forever.
So why did Victoria feel so cold? Why did she feel sick at the thought of Adrian using her because she’d been so gullible? Why did she want to cry at the thought that he would replace her with someone else tonight? That she’d never had a chance to be anything more than a lay?
Victoria’s eyes burned with sudden tears. She bit the inside of her cheek and sternly commanded herself to get it together. She had five orders to get out and no time to waste on her personal life.
You should be used to that already.
Besides, she was a big girl. If Adrian turned out to be a womanizing jerk, well, she’d have to get over it, wouldn’t she? This kind of thing happened all the time to people all over the world.
She wasn’t special in that regard. She would get over it and she would eventually find someone else who was able to see past her current circumstances and appreciate the good person she was inside.
Her pep talk lasted all of a few minutes because just as she finished delivering a final plate of wings, she turned around and ran right into Adrian.
EIGHT
Adrian could hardly believe what he was looking at. Victoria, his Victoria, was dressed in a tiny skirt and shirt, her dark hair in two saucy pigtails. A light sheen of perspiration dotted her forehead and the mouthwatering planes of her bare stomach.
She was sexy. Painfully so.
He’d watched her for a long minute, seeing how fluidly Victoria glided across the floor. She moved as gracefully here in this darkened, overly-loud sports bar as she did in his bed.
Before he knew it, Adrian had walked past the cheerful server and straight towards the woman who’d skillfully tied him into knots from the first moment he’d woken up today.
Although it wasn’t the first time he’d had a lover sleep over, it was the first time that he’d disrupted his entire routine for one. Adrian never overslept. He never missed his workout. And he positively, absolutely never felt disappointment when his lovely lady bid adieu.
Adrian didn’t know what to do with those emotions rocking through him like a chaotic freight train. He’d thought the sex would be enough to set him straight. It wasn’t. The strained minutes before his driver arrived should’ve been the impetus to prove his fascination with Victoria had come to an end.
Not even close.
When she’d entered his car, he had to kill the impulse to jump right in with her. Adrian had seriously considered cancelling all his appointments and seducing Victoria into cancelling hers. In those seconds before Mr. Jordan had closed the door, Adrian had to tighten his fist to keep from hauling her out of the car and over his shoulder.
He always trusted his instincts. For the first time in forever, Adrian didn’t trust them at all. How could he when they urged him to make decisions that didn’t compliment his structured life?
Adrian hadn’t planned on calling her tonight. He hadn’t planned on seeing her either. Not until the fever eased. And yet here he was…
He stopped a few feet away and waited for her to turn, to see him and prove that she felt the same madness he did.
Come on, kitten. Don’t let me be alone in this.
>
And much like the first time they met, Victoria turned around and ran right into him.
“Oh!”
He reached out and steadied her. The feel of her arms beneath his palms reminded Adrian of how he held them as he pounded into her from behind last night. Victoria had responded wildly to that position, especially when he let go of one arm and slid his hand around her hip to slide across her slippery folds…
Adrian’s shaft filled. He ached to bring her close, to run his hands beneath her short skirt and feel her as he did the night before.
Victoria’s mouth had been fixed in a friendly smile until she saw it was him. The smile disappeared. An array of emotions sped across her flushed face, too quickly to decipher.
“What are you doing here?”
He felt his brows snap together in a frown. She didn’t sound happy to see him at all. He thought about her distance from him this morning and didn’t like the conclusion his agile mind drew.
“Can we talk?”
He watched as she scanned the restaurant. Adrian wanted to just focus on Victoria, but he was acutely aware of the men appraising her. Some discreetly while others were blatant in their looking. Adrian immediately wanted to wrap her up in his coat, to hide her from the imagined leers surrounding them.
The rush of possessiveness and anger he felt took him aback. Adrian didn’t lose his cool. Ever.
“Okay. Follow me.”
Victoria asked another skimpily clad waitress if she could cover her tables for five minutes. Adrian wanted more but wisely kept his silence. She didn’t seem happy to see him and perhaps she had every reason to be unhappy. His presence pushed an unspoken boundary. Being on her turf put Adrian at a disadvantage versus being at his building and he didn’t care for the tactical error.
They exited through the back door and into the empty alley. Silence wrapped them close the whole time. Now they faced one another, her on one side of the alley and him on the other.
“Adrian, what you doing here?”
He searched for a ready-made excuse. “You forgot your leftovers.”
“Oh. Thank you. You didn’t have to worry about it. You could’ve just thrown them out.”
Adrian didn’t like her response. At all. Especially because she seemed so polite and sincere about it. He went next for humor. “I was hungry for some wings.”
