The Georges appeared again, removing our plates from the table only to return with an assortment of what appeared to be desserts.
“For your third course: plum pudding, Bird’s custard, Furmity and mince pies,” one of them announced. I’d grown tired of trying to decide which George was which, preferring to just refer to them as the two Georges.
“And the Bratäpfel, George?” Christine asked.
“Coming momentarily, Miss Pelham.”
Before I even had the chance to ask, Christine leaned into me and explained what a Bratäpfel was. “It is a baked apple stuffed with marzipan, nuts and red current jam.”
“Sounds wonderful,” I said with a fake smile. I was too preoccupied by the fact that this might be the last time I ever saw Christine, Pelham (alive) and my Rand again.
“I do love a good pud,” Pelham announced and encouraged one of the Georges to add a bit more of the Christmas pudding to his plate, something which looked like a dark brown circular block with a few raisins and currants trying to escape. The sprig of holly at the top did nothing to make the pudding appear any more appetizing.
After everyone enjoyed the holiday desserts, with the exception of me, our plates were cleared again and Christine clapped her hands together excitedly.
“Shall I retrieve the Christmas crackers?” she asked.
Pelham nodded and she hurried to the Christmas tree, her skirts swooshing this way and that. She returned with a box from which she handed each of us a wrapped cylindrical little gift, maybe twelve inches long. Each cracker was adorned by a small paper crafted Christmas tree. I watched Pelham and Rand hold the cracker between each of their hands and copied them.
“Go!” Christine announced and we each pulled our Christmas crackers until they exploded with a small bang and the smell of gunpowder lay in the air. What surprised me were the few gifts that landed on the table after the crackers snapped. I unwrapped a crown and realized everyone else was already crowning themselves. Not to be outdone, I unfolded the gold paper crown and fashioned it atop my head. Then I noticed a small slip of paper similar to what you’d find in a fortune cookie.
“What is red, white and black all over?” Christine read, holding the cracker paper in her hands. We all shook our heads and a smile radiated across her pretty face. “Father Christmas after he has slid down the chimney!”
Suddenly the major event of the evening prodded me out of enjoying myself, and I remembered that I hadn’t let Rand know what was going to happen this evening. More than anything, I had to convince him sending me back to my own time was not up for debate.
Rand?
He glanced at me and there was such love in his eyes, I felt myself choking on a sob.
Rand, Mercedes is meeting us tonight, before midnight with Mathilda.
The smile on his face dropped. Why?
So we can attempt the spell to send us back.
Jolie…
I clenched my eyes shut and focused on my shaking hands. Please, Rand. You must accept this. It is as it has to be.
You have already decided then? His eyes revealed anger and hurt.
I want nothing more than to stay with you and be your wife but it isn’t a possibility, Rand. I love you with all my heart but I must leave. I’m so sorry.
He finished his mulled wine, refusing to look at me.
“Shall we retire to the drawing room to watch the snow fall?” Pelham asked, observing both our wan expressions.
I smiled and stood up. “Yes, that sounds wonderful.”
“And shall we sing carols?” Christine suggested.
I nodded. “That sounds even better.”
She disappeared into the drawing room and began playing “Away in a Manger” for her first sing-along.
Before I could follow Pelham into the drawing room, Rand grabbed my hand and whisked me aside, closing the dining room doors for privacy.
“Jolie, please tell me you have thought this through thoroughly.”
I nodded. “There is no way around it.”
“Does my love for you mean nothing?”
I shook my head, biting my lip as tears welled in my eyes. I stared at the floor then clenched my eyes shut, hoping to control my emotions. But, I failed. I opened my eyes as a stream of tears escaped, rolling freely down my cheeks. Rand wiped my cheeks with his fingers and blotted the tears away.
“I feel your agony,” he whispered hoarsely.
“I love you more than you’ll ever know,” I whispered. “But, I can’t stay with you. I have to return.”
He didn’t say anything for a few seconds, but pulled me into the warmth of his embrace and held me as I cried, kissing the top of my head. “I understand,” he said finally.
I felt a suffocating weight lift from within me and realized I was channeling Rand’s feelings. He had let go and was going to allow me to do what I had to do. He supported me and honored my decision even though he didn’t entirely understand it.
“Promise me something, Jolie,” he started.
I pulled away from him and noted the glassiness of his eyes. “Anything,” I whispered.
“You must make the me of your time understand our connection. We are meant to be together, I know it as clearly as I know my own name.”
I nodded. “I will do my best. I will tell you everything that happened here, now.”
He smiled before kissing me. His lips were so soft and warm. I closed my eyes and relished the feel and taste of him before returning to the drawing room. Even though Christine and Pelham had no idea I would soon be leaving, I had to see them once more, thank them for their hospitality and tell them how grateful I was. I knew I would see Pelham again, as my ghostly friend of Pelham Manor, but this would be a final goodbye to Christine and the thought wrenched my heart.
#
At ten minutes to midnight, Rand and I awaited Mercedes and Mathilda at the junction of the largest elm and willow trees on the property. I was impervious to the freezing night air as I was cocooned in Rand’s embrace. Not able to fight my tears, they fell freely.
“I see them,” I whispered, observing Mathilda and Mercedes’ colorful auras as they shone through the skeletal outlines of the trees. I wondered why Mercedes wasn’t covering hers which radiated in a rainbow.
Rand tightened his grip on me and held me closer. As we watched them advance, the sinking feeling in my stomach increased. What if the spell didn’t work? What if I could never get back? That very thought that had plagued me only days before, I now welcomed. But, one thought I didn’t welcome was the concern that Gwynn’s blade might kill me.
“Do not think those thoughts,” Rand said and I realized I should have been blocking my feelings. It wasn’t right for him to know my private worries, not when there would be nothing he could do about them.
“Jolie, Rand,” Mercedes said, greeting us.
“Ms. Berg,” Rand started.
Mercedes smiled and said, “Please, call me Mercedes.” She glanced around, observing the scenery, while she placed her hands on her hips. Nodding, she faced us again and held out her arms, just as a giant sword appeared. It was the same sword I’d seen her use to create her magical circle when last we’d met.
I watched her perform what seemed like the same ritual, outlining a giant circle in the dirt around all four of us. She called to the different directions again, and to the elements of the earth, using fire and water in her incantation. Then she turned to face us.
“Please join hands.” We did as we were told. I reached for Rand’s hand while Mathilda took my other hand.
“Wait,” Rand started. “How can I be certain Jolie will not be in danger?”
I gulped, wondering this question myself.
“There is no guarantee,” Mercedes started.
“Then I will not agree to this,” Rand said, dropping Mercedes’ hand.
“Rand,” I started.
“Allow me,” Mathilda said and pulled him aside. I couldn’t make out what they were saying but Rand’s
mouth was tight and his body language showed his reluctance to accept whatever it was Mathilda was telling him. He finally heaved a sigh and nodded. Whatever Mathilda had told him, had worked. He returned to our circle, looking weary—as though he were supporting the weight of the world.
“This will require complete focus and projection,” Mercedes resumed. “Rand and Mathilda, the force of the spell will come from you both. Rand, you must channel Jolie’s magic through your bond.”
And that was when I realized this whole bonding scenario was necessary for the magic to work properly, as Rand never would have been strong enough to perform it alone. It disagreed with me like a bad taste in my mouth and made me feel more like a pawn in the Underworld than I ever had before. Was our love true, real? Or was it just the means to power this charm? It certainly felt real…
Mercedes faced me angrily. “Never doubt the bond, Jolie. It is not something I could have fabricated. It is whole, pure and cannot be manufactured.”
I swallowed hard and nodded, silently happy to hear it.
“Focus,” Mathilda said softly. “This will require a great deal of energy and power.”
I closed my eyes and tightened my grip on their hands.
“Imagine a portal opening in your mind’s eye,” Mercedes said, her voice sounding melodic in the still night air. “Direct all your power into that portal, allow it to open and remain open.”
Everyone became quiet as we imagined the portal opening, creating a passageway into my own time. After a few minutes, I opened my eyes and saw Mercedes’ frown.
“It is not working,” she said, eyeing each one of us. “You must put all your energy into making that portal real enough that you could touch it. The spell will not work if we cannot fully commit our intentions into it.”
She closed her eyes again and we all followed suit. I pushed myself to the edge, imagining the portal opening wide, imbuing it with my magic.
Mathilda let go of my hand and I opened my eyes.
“She is too strong,” Mathilda whispered.
Mercedes nodded and glanced at me. “Jolie, your barriers are stopping us and we cannot break them down.”
I swallowed hard. “What does that mean?”
Mercedes heaved a deep sigh, which was something that left me feeling nothing but anxious. When she looked into my eyes again, there was nothing I could read in her expression.
“We must recreate the event in which I was able to break through your barriers.”
It took me a second to realize what she meant and when I did, a bolt of despair and panic shot through me. “You mean…”
“We must stab you.”
twenty one
Rand dropped both my and Mathilda’s hands and stepped away, all the while shaking his head. “I will have nothing to do with this.”
Well, I couldn’t say I wasn’t thinking the same way. I’d been nearly stabbed once and that was one too many times, thank you very much.
“We are losing time,” Mercedes started, pacing back and forth as the full moon highlighted her long brown hair.
“I am finished. I cannot endanger Jolie’s life,” Rand said, running his hand through his hair in frustration. He moved to stand in front of me protectively, as if sheltering me from Mercedes.
“We will not endanger her life,” Mathilda started.
“You?” Rand faced her and his voice betrayed his disappointment. “You comply with this absurdity?”
Mathilda nodded and brought her gaze to the cloud studded sky. She held her hands upward and closed her eyes, looking like some sort of human antenna…well, fairy antenna. She reopened her eyes and let her hands fall, nodding. “It is the only way.”
A cold wind suddenly swooshed through the trees, their skeletal branches swaying with the gusts. The wind howled, chilling us with its icy embrace. I wrapped my arms around myself more tightly.
“Jolie’s protective walls are too impervious,” Mercedes started, capturing Rand’s attention again as she approached us. Her tone was level, informative. “If only we can break through her barriers, our magic will send her back.”
“And if we fail to break through?” Rand demanded, holding me firmly in place behind him.
“Then I die,” I croaked and stepped out from his protection. The moon almost blinded me with its intensity. It was like the God of Night was shining a spotlight on me.
Mercedes shook her head and it felt as if her eyes were boring through my soul. “Mathilda and I will not allow you to die, Jolie. You must trust in providence. You have a purpose to fulfill which does not include you dying here.”
“I hope you’re right,” I started, wondering if the “fulfilling my purpose” stuff was all true or just a way for Mercedes to get me to do what she wanted. If nothing else, she was persuasive. She should’ve been a lawyer.
“Does this mean you agree to this insanity?” Rand asked, turning his anger and pain filled eyes on me.
“What other choice do we have?” I answered in a mouse voice.
His smile was as full of sweetness as it was sorrow. He grasped my hands and rubbed the tops of my fingers with his. “We can choose to forget this foolishness and share the remainder of our lives together,” he started, his voice soft, lulling. “As husband and wife.”
I tightened my grip on his hands, feeling an ache inside that spread like cancer through me. I started to cry and closed my eyes, dropping my attention to the ground in order to get my emotions under control. I didn’t want Rand to see me cry; that would be too hard on him. Granted, he could feel everything I was currently feeling so he knew how depressed I was, but I didn’t want to add to his pain.
“I want that, Rand, more than anything, but we can’t have it here and now,” I whispered. “We will have it in my own time, though, I promise.”
“Jolie,” he started.
“She cannot stay here,” Mercedes interrupted sternly. “The Goddess dictates that she must return to her present time. Her destiny does not include remaining.”
Rand wouldn’t look at Mercedes and instead, tightened his lips into a straight line, never removing his eyes from mine. I could read his love for me in his gaze like I was reading a book. His feelings surged within me so strong that my heart ached and I wanted desperately to agree to his proposal. He sighed deeply, as if expelling the sorrow building within him, and I knew he had come to accept the situation. Finally, he addressed Mercedes. “Can you ensure me that your blade will not kill her?”
Mercedes nodded emphatically. “Yes, I can.”
Rand shook his head and looked at me again. His smile was warm, sincere. As he gazed at me, he ran a finger down the side of my face. “Then it looks as if I have no choice but to participate.”
“Thank you, Rand,” I said, rubbing my sleeve against my face to dry away the hot tears that continued to fall down my cheeks. I was afraid and Rand was feeling it too. I trusted in Mercedes, but it was a wary trust as I knew she was only obeying the Goddess’s bidding. Did I think Mercedes would lie to us? No. Did I think she had my best interests at heart? I couldn’t be sure.
“Jolie,” Mercedes interrupted and I turned toward her.
“Yes?”
“When Gwynn attacked you, where were you standing? Can you demonstrate please?”
I closed my eyes and tried to remember. An image of the battle entered my mind like a nightmare and I could see our little alcove, with Sinjin acting as sentry while Rand looked on in shock. I’d been facing away from Gwynn, looking at Rand. At Rand’s verbal warning, I’d turned and Gwynn had plunged her dagger. But, I’d only ever felt the cold steel of her blade on the surface of my stomach. Why? Because just then, Mercedes had intercepted and saved me. I opened my eyes again and took a few steps away from everyone.
“Rand, you were there,” I said, pointing to a space just to the northeast of where I stood.
Rand nodded and with a heavy heart, walked to the location I pinpointed. I turned away from him, closing my eyes as I tried to recreate t
he scene in my mind, trying not to think of the gaping hole in my heart. Instead, I focused, focused entirely on staging the scene that had nearly killed me. I opened my eyes again and focused on Mercedes.
“Gwynn came up behind me,” I said and stood beside her, turning toward Rand while trying to estimate the distance between Mercedes and him. I stepped away from Mercedes and asked her. “Will you play the part of Gwynn?”
She nodded. “Yes.”
“I was facing Rand when he yelled to me to turn around and when I did, Gwynn buried her blade into my gut. At least that’s what I thought happened but you rescued me before her blade could even penetrate my skin.”
Rand’s hands fisted at his sides and Mercedes settled her attention on him. “And I will rescue her again, Rand. Nothing to fear.”
At the mention of “rescuing her again”, I thought I should probably bring up the question of timing once more, just to be sure she hadn’t forgotten. “So, we will go back to my time with at least ten seconds to spare, right?”
Mercedes faced me and her mouth was tight. “It is very difficult to predict timing.”
Not exactly the answer I wanted to hear. “But, you were able to pull me back before Gwynn did any damage.”
“That is not to say I can do it again.”
I shook my head. That wasn’t good enough. “So, I could die?”
Mercedes’ eyes were intense, powerful. “You will not die.”
“But, how,” Rand started, determined steps bringing him closer.
“You must trust in providence,” Mercedes interrupted and held up her hand as if to say she’d heard enough and didn’t want to bother herself with the messy details. Not waiting for us, she turned around to ponder the scene before her. She took a few steps forward, only to rest her chin on her hand as if considering the best layout for our reenactment. She sidestepped me and then nodded.
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